denial

so. I don't know what to do with this. my last mission email ever, right? it doesn't feel real enough to write like it's my last one. 
so I'll just write like I normally do.
I remember last week Gibbons told me to expect to see miracles in my last two weeks like I haven't seen before. I have a lot of examples of just that. but maybe I talk about two of them. so first, Rose. not sure I mentioned her before...she is african. she had beautiful african hair wrapped the african way like they did it in tanzania so I started talking to her about that. I invited her to church, she came  that sunday, but when she came she told us about all the anti stuff she had heard. it was pretty heavy. we tried our best, but we were fairly certain that she wasn't gonna come again. well, saturday night rolls around and I call her just to invite her to come to church again, and she says she would! and she did! just like that. she said she didn't like the stuff she heard but she can't deny the feelings she has at church. and in sunday school she very actively participated in the whole class as if she had been a member for a long time already. she's incredible. and she's insanely beautiful. and she is one miracle, I think. 
the other miracle involves Amika. I'm pretty sure I've talked about her before. she was a miracle find when we were faith finding. and now she has come to church twice. but the first time we met her, she mentioned an experience she had with some "missionaries" (not sure what church) that came and talked nonstop about baptism and how she needed to get baptized again. she didn't like that one at all, and she made it clear from the beginning she was gonna have none of that from us. which worried us! haha. we come to help people prepare to be baptized. you know? so we prayed a lot about that and how we were gonna go around that. so then this past sunday she comes to church, and a members son had just turned 8 so it was his baptism. and tooooons of people came. and it was really special. and amika stayed to see it. well, after, I asked her what she thought and if she had any questions. and she said, "well when I was baptized I was a baby with water on my head. but you guys do it, like....the same way jesus did in the movie. is it?" so then I explain to her we follow his way because we are his church. and she tells me about how much she loved it and the feelings she had and then she says, "I would like to be baptized. is it okay??" hahaha. which, of course, was a MIRACLE to say the least. so she'll be baptized soon too:)
also, elvis is getting the priesthood!!! and the other night we were teaching him and his two best friends, which want to be baptized as well, and we told elvis after he got the aaronic priesthood he would be able to baptize them. WOW! they were all so amped on that!!!! again, I selfishly hate that I won't be here. but it will happen and it will be a miracle. oh, and elvis went out and bought two pairs of mens trousers and two more ties for church. haha. he wants to look good!
this is a funny one, since its been a while. so many many weeks ago, I bought this very obnoxious creepy looking cat toy that meows and his eyes light up when you turn it on. it's loud and obnoxious. but I bought it so I could put it on sister pinkston when she was sleeping. which I did, and it was awesome. it was such a big hit, a few weeks later we did it to gopinath, which was awesome because all she did was pick it up and chuck it at me. haha. so we had been saving this cat to wait for a good time to do it to noordy. we didn't want to do it too early for fear she'd think it was like hazing or something. so we kept waiting. it never felt right, and we just weren't gonna do it. until one night rhodesy steals it and decides to put it on me. I'm dead asleep, and in my dream I see this cat in my face meowing at me. I guess it was going off for some 5 or so minutes without me waking up. finally I wake up, halfway, recognize what was happening, so I turn it off and roll over to go back to sleep. but then my sleep was very rudely interrupted by rhodesy's mad giggles coming from her bunk bed. when I say mad, they were mad giggles. so loud. her laughter was what woke me up completely from my sleep, which I was quite annoyed about. I think we all were. but she couldn't stop. so I yell, "pull it together rhodes!!!!!!!!!!!" and immediately fall back asleep. I think she laughed the remainder of the night cause she was quite tired the next morning. haha. her fault! it was funny though. we both occasionally start laughing all over again about it.
also, this was cool. we went to see our investigator balu at his shop yesterday, it's the place I bought all my indian outfits. and we also love eeeeeeveryone that works there. it's a party every time we stop by. they usually give us something or dress us up or whatever. but yesterday we walked in and I had just bought tied jasmine flowers that the girls always wear but I didn't know how. so they sat us down and did our hair for us and gave me these huge elizabeth taylor style clip on earings complete with the sticker on our forehead and they were dying. I guess we are indian already. the switch has happened:) but we walked around like that the rest of the day and I loved it. I must go to india ASAP.
I'll end with a cool quote that mum had given me in a card at the very beginning of my mission. I wonder if you even remember. "the mind determines what's possible. the heart surpasses it. follow your heart." I have reflected on that a lot this past week and it has touched me all over again. the heart is important. I try every day to get my heart right. and I really think the heart, or love, is like, the catalyst for everything. if theres love for what you're doing, you do anything to accomplish your goal. and you accomplish it. 
well, I guess this is it. 
I love you all. 
see you soon.