How I feel about sharing the title of "Griffin's mom" — thoughts on open adoption

by candace

As I woke up on the morning of Griffin's first birthday I felt a little like something was missing. I let my thoughts wonder to the year before, the events of that Sunday morning in Arizona. As I reflected I thought about how Heidi must have felt as she was wheeled into a c-section that she had informed me she wanted to avoid if at all possible, how she felt as she watched a nurse comb griffins hair into a little Mohawk while she was still in recovery, and how she felt as Dave and I walked into her room to take this perfect, beautiful baby from her life. 

Within days of finding out that we couldn't have children I was filling out adoption paperwork. I knew that I had to do my part, and do it quickly. Suddenly we had to decide if we wanted to choose if we had a boy or girl first, if we were cool enough to raise children that we a different race than we were, if we were willing to take on the complications of a fetal alcohol baby, if we wanted to have an open adoption. We didn't know much about open adoptions. I remember the case worker encouraging us in that direction. "It's just more people to love the child." Little did I know how profound that statement would become.

Heidi first contacted us in May and told us she was due with a boy in early September. We were reeling with questions but didn't really know when or how to ask so we moved forward with our communication cautiously. One morning in June as I was running out the door to be a leader at our youth camp I decided to check my email before I left. There was an email from Heidi telling us that she wanted us to be the parents of her unborn child.
  

There we were, in late July, knocking on the door of Heidi's parents' home. Two hours later we left feeling full. Full of love. They became family that day. They already loved that baby so much that they were willing to place him with a couple that they knew were his parents. I was blown away by their surety. In the middle of the conversation Heidi interrupts, "He keeps moving when you talk...come feel!"  They genuinely cared about us and they made it so easy for us to love them.

Over the next several weeks I learned so much about love and family from that wonderful family. They loved and supported Heidi and they loved and supported us. In the hospital room that Sunday Griffin was born there was no doubt that he was so lucky to have so many people to love him...from all three sides of his family.
   

As the excitement of Griffin's first birthday progressed throughout the day I knew exactly what was missing. Heidi. I supposed that this birthday brought more pain than joy for her. I wanted her in my home, standing next to me, feeling what I was feeling. I wanted his smiles to brings smiles to her face. I wanted her to laugh as he hesitantly played with his chocolate cake and ate his birthday presents. I wanted this day to be a day of joy for her.
 

Each year on his birthday I find myself feeling the same way and each year my hope is that some of that pain is replaced with joy. I hope that all of that pain is replaced with joy. Because she did something incredible. And will always be family. She is his birth mom. And always will be. And we love her for it.

Happy Birth Mother's Day Heidi!

Sunday dinner minus pot roast, mashed potatoes, and gravy

For the past couple weeks Merlin, his sister Kim, Kevin, and I have been eating a ton more veggies and fruits, hardly any processed foods and dairy, and no cookies.  We are learning a lot and coming up with some decent menus.  Our systems (some more delicate than others) are adjusting quite well, and we have all been surprised that we have been able to make some significant changes in our diet.  Tonight's meal was especially colorful and appetizing.  The menu included asparagus spritzed with Balsamic vinegar, Luana's sun-dried tomato pasta salad (whole wheat pasta), grapes, and nectarines. (Yes, the text is red to match the plates.)

Your new food guide pyramid

by candace

From Joel Fuhrman's Eat for Health book

Sweet Potato Recipe

by candace

Again, from Joel Fuhrman's Eat for Health book

Made this tonight and it was tasty. I think the kids would like it too.

Healthy Dinner

by candace

Dinner was pretty successful tonight so I thought I'd share:

(Both of these are from Joel Fuhrman's Eat for Health book)

Cranberry Roasted Brussel Sprouts — these are really good!

Cut off ends of 3 c Brussels sprouts and cut them in half

Combine with 1/4 c coconut oil (I used 1/8 c and think you could omit it all together) and 1/4 c organic pure maple syrup and sea salt to taste. Place in casserole dish and roast in oven at 350F for 20-30 minutes until slightly browned. Add 1/4 c cranberries the last 5 minutes and serve hot!

(Recipe from Graci...don't know where she got it)

Smoothies

by candace

So here are some of my smoothie recipes/tips...

Always start with water (1-2 cups) and then fill your blender with greens...the more the better. Mix that up then start adding fruit.

In my opinion, every smoothie is better with banana. Then I either add some apple or some orange, then I add the fruit that I want to be the main flavor.

Protein is optional. Dave was feeling like he needed more protein so he now adds it to his smoothies. We buy the Garden of Life Raw Vegan Protein. Looks like this:

http://www.gardenoflife.com/Products-for-Life/Foundational-Nutrition/RAW-Protein.aspx

There are comparable ones...this was the cheapest last time I bought it so that's why I went with this one. I think Stef said Green Smoothie Girl sells in bulk in the fall and it's much cheaper so maybe that's a good option.

We usually add Chia seeds and Flaxseeds to our smoothies...about 1 tablespoon of each per serving.

THE SMOOTHIE DAVE MAKES EVERY MORNING (1 serving)
Water and greens
1/2 frozen banana
1/3 to 1/2 apple
Blueberries—not too many
Lots of frozen mangos—maybe a cup

(Protein, flaxseeds, chia seeds)

CHOCOLATE MINT SMOOTHIE (from Stef) — love this one, it's like dessert

1/2 cup coconut milk (or almond, flax, etc)  —  Candace uses Almond

2 spoonfuls of avocado 

1 scoop vanilla protein powder

1/2 cup or more of spinach

2 packed tsp of mint leaves

2-3 drops peppermint oil

1/2 banana

8 ice cubes

Blend well then add 2 tsp cacao nibs and briefly blend

BERRY LIME SMOOTHIE

Water and greens

1 banana

1.5ish cups of frozen mixed berries

1 T lime juice

(Protein and seeds)

FESTIVAL BLEND SMOOTHIE

Water and greens

1/2 - 1 banana

Some apple or orange

1-2 cups of the Festival Blend mix from Costco (Papaya, Mango, Pineapple, Strawberries)

(Protein and seeds)

These last two are nothing special—just trying to show you some of the things I've tried that have been good. They are not quite as good as the mango one above. We love mango in our smoothies so we use them a lot. I don't love the smoothies as much when I dump a bunch of random fruit in. I like them more when one flavor is stronger. And if you've made a smoothie and you don't love it add more banana. That usually helps.

Delayed Carving

by Marci

Even as The Soldier ran dozens of errands while packing for deployment, we could not remember to have him purchase pumpkins to carve for Halloween.  So, as I drove our kids home from dropping him off I stopped at a fall harvest stand on the side of the highway.  I hoped to calm (or at least distract) some devastated children, two of whom were screaming, "I don't like the Army.  I wish Dad would just quit his job!" It worked quickly, as each started pointing out what he or she thought was the largest pumpkin.  I chose a Cinderella gourdish one.

For family home evening last night, we finally carved the pumpkins.  The kids seemed just as excited as if we would have pulled it off in time for Halloween.  Our method (which I remember from my dad) includes cutting out the top, carving out the guts, designing the face on a scratch paper, cutting out the paper design, and lightly straight pinning it to the pumpkin for a successful cut out.  Before I could blink my oldest had dozens of straight pins punched through the paper and "hammered" all the way through the thickness of the pumpkin.  Wish I had a picture of that.

Hi Dad

by Marci

Our new primary communication.  It's already a fight to get it away from her OR to convince her that not every ring means The Soldier is calling.

New Items for Sale!

Hi family and friends!

We've been working hard to get more items on our website this year so go check it out:

seefishcreate.bigcartel.com

There are Christmas cards and great Christmas gifts.


I'm excited to announce that this year we are having a special on our website until December 31, 2012—

100% of the proceeds from the sale of The Gathering of Friends cookbooks,

100% of the profits from the sale of Christmas cards and word art by Candace,

and 25% of the profits from the sale of calligraphy by Julia

will be donated to benefit Natalie & Alice Fish

Read their story at fishesformarrowwishes.blogspot.com


Want to help but don't want to buy anything?

Feel free to send this email on to your friends or pin some of our items on your Pinterest boards so we can get the word out.


One more thing...we always love custom work so if you want something and don't see it on our website let us know!


THANKS and Merry Christmas!
candace & julia & maggie

And "Kri" We Did

by Marci

The Soldier left today to Ft Dix for training prior to his 9-month deployment to the Horn of Africa.

Packing for 10+ months in 3 bags is a little tricky.

Northeastern Leaves

by Marci

For each extended training or deployment, The Soldier has asked me to make him a quilt. This time he scoured Google images for a pattern that would remind him of home.  The colorful New England fall was in full swing, and we were beginning the annual process of leaf blowing, so it seemed fitting that he found this pattern.

The Soldier helped choose the fabrics, then I worked on it diligently for about three weeks (between outdoor leaf blowing and periods of household catch up).  I even worked on it during our three-day, no-child Cape Cod getaway.

(I must insert here that he gave me very strict instructions that I could only work on the quilt when I had love in my heart for him, so that would transfer to the finished product.)

I took a week break...huhah!--not for lack of lovey feelings--then finished the tag on the back, just in time to take it to the machine quilter.

Planning and sewing in my formal dining room.  

Does anyone in my phase of life actually use a formal dining room for formal dining? 

The Soldier's Insanity workout while I completed leaf row #8 of 11 at 

a friend's cottage in Cape Cod.

 I've hardly bordered any quilt and was surprised how long it took to 

center the seams and make the corners just right.  I should have planned better 

before I jumped into it.  Typical.

Somehow this dear couple agreed to long-arm quilt this for me in a 24-hour period.  And when they discovered the quilt's purpose, they upgraded the design and refused to take a cent for payment.  An unforgettable gift from strangers.  I still get a little weepy thinking of their kindness.

They delivered the quilt, and I finished the binding within 14 hours of The Soldier's leaving. Plenty of time, right?

Front

Zoom

Check out the variegated thread.

Back

Silly that I didn't even see the pattern in this flannel to match the center seam
until someone held it up for me.  A lesson in working too quickly
and looking too closely.

 Zoom

When I saw the scrap in my stash, I just had to add the rooster, hen, and four chicks 

to represent our family.  Big D is still bothered that his place is as a chick 

and not the rooster.

The quilters insisted that the quilt have a name for their records.  The Soldier decided on "Northeastern Leaves." Not much of that where he's going.

Happy Birthday, Amy!

by Marci

I'm not sure how this one didn't make the cut last year.

Go Cougs!

Going Away

by Marci

So, The Soldier is getting ready to deploy and church friends wanted to surprise him with a goodbye party.  They pulled off the surprise, even with three of our four young children knowing about it in advance.

Adults and kids wrote notes on patriotic cards that were compiled in this album.  The message below is from our Sweet #2.

Thank you for a memorable night and such a thoughtful, lasting gift!

SEE FISH SALSA

by Stefanie

Well, I wish I was coordinated enough to do the salsa.  Zumba has taught me that it's not exactly my forte...but this is a salsa I can do:

There is nothing better to do with fresh, summer tomatoes than making salsa.  We make it in LARGE batches at our house with really no set recipe but here is the gist:

In a food processor we blend 6-8 tomatoes, a handful of parsley, two handfuls of cilantro, one large onion (yellow or red or a little of both), several cloves of garlic, 3 or so stalks of celery, a sweet pepper, a hot pepper (if you want--we often don't), two or more tablespoons of fresh lemon juice (or lime or a combination of both), and sea salt to taste.  You really can't go wrong--unless your onions are strong and you put in too much.  Sometimes I don't have all the above veggies.  Today I made some and was lacking sweet peppers.  I had some radishes, so I threw several of those in.  It's just kind of whatever--  although I would say the essentials are tomatoes, onion, cilantro, and lemon.  Make it for your taste and how it looks.  I personally like to see a lot of green in mine; I don't want it to look like straight tomatoes.
Enjoy!

FISH FAVORITES

by Stefanie

My favorite thing to eat--hands down--is a cookie.  (Actually not a cookie, but cookies--one is never enough.)  I think most of my family would say cookies are one of their favorite things as well.  We didn't have a lot of store bought treats growing up, but my mom did make homemade cookies and pies.  She loved to make chocolate chip cookies and eat the dough...who doesn't?!  She always had a stash of chocolate chips in food storage room--I think specifically for cookies--and I stole more than my share for midnight snacks.

Unfortunately, cookies are not the most healthful thing, so I've tried many recipes of healthful alternatives--none so great that I would make them again and again.  When we are hunkering for a treat at our house, we default to our Mrs. Field's oatmeal, chocolate chip recipe.  I've made it so many times I can do it without the recipe, with my left hand, and with my eyes closed.  Tonight I experimented (again) with the recipe trying to make it a little more nourishing.  A woman told me about a flour mix--equal parts of spelt, barley, and brown rice--that she uses in place of white flour in all her cookies and cakes.  She claimed her kids love the substitution, and she never makes her cookies with white flour anymore.

Well, I thought I would give it a go since I will eat just about anything that has chocolate chips in it.  I happened to have those three grains on hand, so I ground my own instead of buying the flour.  (For those of you in Utah, you can get the flour mix at the Bosch kitchen store.)  I didn't want to chance ruining a whole batch of cookies, so I still used half of the white flour.  And...THEY TURNED OUT DELICIOUS!  Here's my modified recipe:

3 cubes of butter, softened
1/4 cup coconut oil
4 eggs
2 cups organic sugar (at Costco!)
2 cups brown sugar (and if you're daring you can substitute sucanant)
1 T real vanilla
Cream together in a Bosch or Kitchen Aid mixer.  Then add:
2 cups organic white flour
2 cups of the spelt-barley-rice flour
(The original recipe calls for 4 cups of white flour.  I've also modified it by doing 3 cups of white flour and 1 cup whole wheat flour without my kids noticing.)
1 tsp salt
2 tsp baking soda
2 tsp baking powder
Mix. Then add:
4-5 cups of rolled oats (part of this can be quinoa flakes!)
2 cups coconut (raw, shredded, unsweetened to be most healthful)
1 1/2 - 2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
Then if you wish, you can add raisins if you are weird like me or if you are like my mom, you would add nuts.  If you do add these extras, I would stick with only 1 1/2 cups of chocolate chips.
Bake at 400 degrees for approximately 9 minutes.  Enjoy!