Anyone Ever Been To Orfglimt?

Sorry I’ve been AWOL here lately, lots going on but nothing interesting or funny to write about. Or it could be that there were many things to write about I just didn’t feel like writing. Yea, that’s probably it. Let’s see, how about a quick recap of my weekend.

Friday:

Spawn and his girlfriend represented the eleventh grade at the basketball game as Sweetheart couple for their class – they didn’t win, the seniors did – Spawn pretended he was crying out on the basketball court – mom was giggling. He spent the night at a friend’s after the game to go hog hunting early the next morning.

Spawnette had a friend spend the night as they were partners for the history fair project –they planned out and prepared to finish up the following day – they stayed up late, ate a lot of junk food, and watched scary movies.

Saturday:

Spawnette due at softball field by 8:15 a.m. for pictures and field clean up. Friend stayed at our house to finish writing history project while Spawnette suffered in the cold. Took both to the mall that afternoon because that’s what teenaged girls want to do.

Spawn was home by 10:00 a.m. after “bagging” four hogs. He mowed grass, cleaned room, and then took off for girlfriend’s house.

Both offspring went to Sweetheart Dance and I got to play taxi for Spawnette and friends. YES. I LOVE THAT PART…. At least we ate at a decent restaurant before the dance but the dang thing didn’t end until after 11:00!

Sunday:

I cleaned house and got ready for Super Bowl Party while Spawnette “worked on her history fair board” and cleaned her room. Spawn hung around and offered to help but didn’t want to scrub toilets or clean kitchen. I guess he watched TV and played Wii and Playstation. The King went to the grocery store; my mom came and helped us prepare food for the guests prior to them coming over around 5:00. We ate, watched a FANTASTIC football game (that’s what a Super Bowl Game should be like!!) and after the game and everyone had left I stayed up with Spawnette to make sure the board actually got done. Went to bed around 1:00 a.m. The board looked good……FINALLY!!!

Nope, boring weekend after all, nothing funny or too exciting yet I didn’t have a free minute to come on and visit with friends. I’m going to try and get caught up as quickly as I can but I actually have work to tend to this week so I won’t be able to sneak peeks here, DANG IT! Look for me lurking around your blogs with a comment here or there and know that I wish I were there instead of here.

Do lurkers tell people when they’re lurking or should I have kept the whole lurking thing a secret so that the lurking was done properly?

Sorry I was gone so long, I Googled “lurking” and got sidetracked on “filksinging”. FYI – for any of you filksingers, I’d like a song dedicated to me to include some kind of ninja assassin from the land of Orfglimt, please.

What A Drag

No, Spawn has not taken to purchasing sequined gowns, stilettos, and really big wigs. In fact Spawn hasn’t been home in almost a month. Spawnette has been gone this week as well and to top it off, my mom left for ten days and my longtime boyfriend decided he could no longer do the long distance relationship thing. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed the slovenly lifestyle I’ve been living this week. I come home from work, throw on shorts and a T-shirt, and have Cap’n Crunch for dinner if I want to. The TV stays off and there is always a book or twenty-seven to keep me occupied for the quiet evenings at home. Coop is with me…..wherever I go…..following, following, always there…..and he’s great company. Never demanding (unless his food bowl is empty); always with a kiss on the end of his tongue. But I must say that without my mother, the spawn, and the Man around providing me with inspiration and awkward situations to write about I’ve come to the realization what a big bore I am.

I. Am. Boring.

I have yet to do something to make myself giggle. I don’t roll my eyes at myself. I don’t tell myself I’m gonna take my phone away if I don’t start talking to me in a better tone of voice. I don’t complain about what’s for dinner and stomp my foot in a fit of anger because something on the plate is green. I don’t make excuses to avoid doing the dishes and I actually brush my teeth and go to bed when I’m supposed to without being told fourteen times that it’s way past my bedtime.

I. Am. Boring.

I need a hobby. A hobby that takes me out of the house. Out of the house in something other than cargo shorts, Vans, and a T-shirt advertising Guinness. Something that does not take place at the retirement center six blocks from the house. (Although those velvet paint-by-number classes look fun; everyone needs a velvet Elvis!) I enjoy photography but haven’t had the opportunity to hone my skills lately. SHIT…that huge glob of mendacity just disgorged itself from my lips, didn’t it? That is what my father, in his all-encompassing wisdom would have called “an excuse”.

G-R-E-AAAAAA-T. I hate it when I’m right. I hate it when those light bulb moments take place illuminating my self-deception.

I. Am. Not. Boring.

I. Am. Lazy.