Victoria Jackson's Latest Train Wreak Music Video

Former SNL castmate Victoria Jackson put her new music video There's a Muslim Living in the White House on Youtube. This is painful to watch. Jackson mumbles conspiracy theories about Obama being secretly a Muslim. This is so bad I literally couldn't watch the entire video.

Let's hypothetically say Obama is actually a Muslim. Are Jackson and her fellow tea party patriots saying that anyone who is automatically a terrorist or a terrorist sympathizer? If they are then that is a highly simplistic and racist way of thinking. Jackson does wonder why there isn't a White History Month.

Wonkette posted this gem that Jackson later deleted from the internet. Preach it, sister.

I’m just really tired of the white male, and especially the white conservative, Christian male being attacked in cartoons, movies, TV shows, politics, Affirmative Action, etc. It’s like in order to fix the “discrimination” problem, culture flipped the racism from “against blacks” to “against whites”. Why do we have to be “against” anyone? Aren’t we all equal?

Just for the record, white men invented rockets, space travel, airplanes, the automobile, the English language, the U.S.A., most medical advances, electricity, television, telescope, microscope, Ivy League Universities, the computer, the Internet, and on and on. I think white men should be praised and respected. White Christian Conservative Men especially, should be loved and adored. They were the backbone and originators of the greatest nation on earth. We need more of them now.

In November, 2012 The Blaze reported that Alec Baldwin tweeted, “…Obama’s re-election signaled the end of white, middle-aged Christian male dominance”.

Maybe that’s why our country is going to pot; our huge deficit, foreign attacks, crashing economy, racial and class warfare, immigration problems, bigger government, disappearing freedom, growing poverty, sky-rocketing unemployment, rancid immorality, more pregnant teens, etc. etc. – “the end of white, middle-aged Christian male dominance.” I’m just saying.

Find a white, middle-aged Christian man today and hug him. And then, encourage him and your white Christian sons to stand up, be leaders again, and save our country from the God-hating communists like Alec Baldwin and Obama.

I'm with Jackson on saving America from Alec Baldwin. The rest of her rant is hysterical nonsense.

L7 - Fast And Frightening (Reading Festival)

This is the infamous moment at the 1992 Reading Festival when Donita Sparks threw her used tampon at the audience. The crowd was throwing mud at L7. Sparks had enough and responded with the tampon throw.

Dave Naz has a famous rehearsal space in Los Angelas that was used by Redd Kross, L7, Chemical People, It's Ok, Pandoras, and Muffs. Naz left this note in the bathroom.

"L7 ladies - don't put tampons in the toilet."

The World's Most Understanding Mother

This is one of the most bizarre, hysterical and strangely beautiful things I have seen on the internet. Porn star Mia Malkova brought her mother to one of her earliest porn shoots. Malkova did not inform her mother was taking her to a porn shoot. The male performer/cameraman did not know that Malkova was bringing her mother. Needless to say, he was surprised when he was introduced to Malkova's mother.

Malkova was working under the name Madison Swan at the time.

"Wow! This is awkward," said Ray the cameraman.

That might be the biggest understatement of all-time.

Blogger Paul Hellion documents the confusion that follows.

"Well, it’s modelling!" assures Mia. Although her mom keeps a polite and warm smile, her eyes dart from Mia to the cameraman, evidently wondering what the fuck she means by modelling.

The camera guy, quickly assessing whether the shoot is still on, hastily adds, “Uh, you do know this is adult modelling, right, Mom?”

"So what is adult modelling?"

"Well, she replied to one of our ads," camera guy begins, "We’re going to be taking some photos of her… she’s a very adorable girl… uh, perhaps scantily clad, perhaps a little nudity." (Mom: "Oh!")

Paul the camera guy is extremely respectful to Malkova's mother during the whole conversation. He is in trying to figure out what the Hell is going on and if he is going to have a shoot. He still can't bring himself to say the P word to Malkova's mother. He has Malkova explain it to her.

MOM: Are you going to be naked?

GUY: Yeah, it is nude modelling, but it’s actually going to be a little naughtier than that. I’m going to be honest with you, Mom.

MOM: Okay…

GUY: It’s, uh… you can tell her, Madison.

MIA: It’s porn.

MOM: Porn like… porn porn? Like with nudity and… people? Seriously, this is what you guys are going to do? You’re doing naked porn with… men? Women? Both? Wow, okay. Can we just have a few minutes to adjust? Because this is completely unexpected.

Mom understandably asks for a moment. Ray turns off the camera.

When the camera comes back on Mom says these words to Malkova.

“If this is something that you want to do and it makes you happy, well, I wish you’d told me first, but if this is something that you want to do then, yes, I guess.”

Mom obviously loves her daughter very much. The then 19 year-old Malkova came out to her mother as someone who was going to pursue porn as a career. It's wonderful that they have that loving of a relationship.

Side note: I am so glad I don't have a daughter.

Tom Brokaw Gets Weird On-Air

Tom Brokaw has an embarrassing imaginary on-air conversation. This guy really needs to not get shit-faced drunk before he goes in front of a camera.

I Kid You Not, Rick Scott Butt Plugs

#rickscott and #chrischristie are both campaigning in Florida. @govchristie @flgovscott #destroyingamericaonestateattheetime #florida #pambondi #bridgegate #fangate #fanghazi

A photo posted by Politicalsculptor.com (@mstyle183) on Oct 10, 2014 at 12:36pm PDT

Instagram user Mstyle183 is selling Rick Scott and Chris Christie butt plugs. I wonder who is in the market to have Rick Scott up their ass?

Quote of the Day

"I've had people say, 'Hey, you know, there's nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks.' Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it's a different kind of fighting, it's a different kind of war and if you're sitting around getting massages all day ready to go into the big, planned battle, then you're not going to last very long. It's guerrilla fighting. You are going to be ultimately vulnerable to terrorism."

Louie Gohmert

Apparently, Gohmert believes that U.S. troops in places like Afghanistan weren't be trying to stop terrorists from killing them because they will be too busy getting massages. I wonder if Gohmert did his military research from watching lots of gay porn. I am really starting to wonder about this guy.

Winnie The Pooh Sings About Child Molestation

This was from Too Smart for Strangers with Winnie the Pooh. Winnie singing about how not to get molested is disturbing in ways that I couldn't even imagine. Shockingly, there are other songs about child predators in the Winnie the Pooh special.

WTF Photo of the Day

Via our good friend Ginger Lee: I laughed my ass off when I saw this photo.

Write A Caption: Justin Bieber Fan

Shakespeare couldn't find the words to properly describe this level of stupidity. A sincerely hope this person doesn't add to the collective gene pool by having children.

Worst Idea Ever: Osama bin Laden Action Figure

The Washington Post reports that the CIA had the horrible and pointless idea of making an Osama bin Laden action figure. The CIA recruited Donald Levine, the late CEO of Hasbro to make the doll.

“It appealed to [Levine] because it had nothing to do with actually hurting someone,” said a person familiar with his decision to get involved. “It was the softer side of the CIA.”

The agency approved the production of the gift items, which were put in backpacks for distribution — blue for boys and pink for girls.

There is nothing a kid wants more than a Satanic looking Osama bin Laden doll.

The stupidity of giving this action figure to children amazes me. Although, it is not certain if any children ever received the action figure. According to CIA spokesman Ryan Trapani, only three dolls were made. One is still housed at the CIA.

Raver Loses Finger and Parties On

A 16 year-old named Josh lost his pinky finger at a rave. Josh went to a rave in the London Borough of Croydon. Josh made the bad choice of trying to rip off a building fire alarm.

Well, at about 1AM we were up in the house room, but I don’t really like house so I was waiting for the drum 'n' bass to kick in. As soon as I heard it, me and my mate went down there. Five minutes in, the fire alarm starting going off and everyone was like, "Rip it off! Rip it off!" So I thought I’d give it a go. I was completely sober at the time. I jumped up, grabbed it and my little finger got caught in the case because it was all broken, and as I came to rip it back down, my little finger got ripped off completely.

A missing pinky doesn't stop Josh. Not when the bass is hard and the girls are hot.

Well, what can you do? There are fit girls around you, the bass is hard, the music is popping. I didn’t want to be the sore thumb sticking out – or the sore pinkie – so I was like, "Fuck it, let's skank on and enjoy it."

Josh didn't have time to go to the hospital. He did have time to post a picture of his injured hand on Instagram. You can't go to the hospital when you got to skank.

Terry Bradshaw: National Security Expert

Fox News brought out their leading national security expect to discuss Benghazi. Yes, I'm talking about NFL Hall of Fame member Terry Bradshaw.

Bradshaw said this when asked if he trusts Hillary Clinton's version of the events after the Benghazi attack.

“Not really,” he grimaced. “Don’t particularly like her, never have. The best thing to do here because she’s selling a book — the only reason she’s on Fox is because she’s promoting books.”

“I always say this, if you tell the truth, you don’t have to worry about covering up some other story,” he continued. “The truth sets you free. Just tell the truth. And now you can hang it — you’ll never forget it, and it becomes your foundation.”

Political views aside, I have always liked Bradshaw. That doesn't mean Fox News should Bradshaw on to talk about Benghazi. Fox News could bring conservative political science professor Dan Drezner on the show. The problem is Drezner is too reasonable for Fox News. Fox News does not do reasonable.

Quote of the Day

“Stupidity cannot be cured. Stupidity is the only universal capital crime; the sentence is death. There is no appeal, and execution is carried out automatically and without pity.”

Robert A. Heinlein

In related news: In Honea Path, South Carolina, Blake Randall Wardel decided to test out a bullet proof vest by letting a friend shoot him. Wardel is now dead. This is another case of people not understanding the danger of guns.

Quote of the Day

"This should be a lesson learned: Never have a three-way with a gun."

Anomaly One Hundred

Talking Points Memo reports a couple in Alabama were shot in their bed.

Jeff David Massey was preparing to clean the gun when it went off, shooting himself in his left hand and his girlfriend, Tammy Lynn Harris, in her right leg, Detective Joshua Fisher told the Decatur Daily.

I'm speechless.

Write A Caption: Alligator Edition

This image is by ABC 7 Sarasota - WWSB. Apparently the gator got itself stuck.

Rob Ford Dancing

Mayor Rob Ford by decree declared Feb. 6 Bob Marley Day. Ford got into the spirit by dancing. Rob Ford is the gift that keeps on giving.

Least Important Breaking News Story Ever

This is hyterical. MSNBC anchor Andrea Mitchell interrupted Rep. Jane Harman for Justin Bieber's bond hearing. Moments like this prove cable news is infortainment. Justin Bieber's bond hearing is not important.

Mitt Romney Dances Gangnam Style

Former presidential candidate Mitt Romney was at the Arizona LDS YSA Regional Conference. Morman singer. Alex Boye pulled Romney onstage to bust a move. I give Romney props for being a good sport.

Write A Caption: Floriduh

I don't even know how this is physically possible or why a women would think it is a good idea to use a squirrel as a weapon.

Jim Greer Update

Via GottaLaff: Former of Republican Party of Florida chairman Jim Greer is now selling La-Z-Boy furniture. Greer is serving out the remainder of his 18 month prison sentence on a work release program.

He was transferred there — a privately-run facility called Bridges of Orlando — Oct. 29. Before that, he was assigned to a Florida Department of Corrections work camp in the Florida Panhandle.

He told the Tampa Bay Times, in an interview published Sept. 6, that while at that camp - Gulf Forestry Camp - he worked six-hour days pulling weeds and picking up trash.

Now, his routine is different.

The Department of Corrections would give few specifics about his life now, except that he lives and sleeps at the center and has worked at a La-Z-Boy Furniture Galleries store since Nov. 18.

There are four in the Orlando area.

He is paid $8 an hour plus a commission, the department reported.

Greer was convicted of stealing $125,000 from the Republican Party of Florida.