Trump Picks RS Aero Sailor as Secretary of State

The news is out!

On this blog my son is usually known as Tiller Extension #1, but his real name (as Tillerman's son) is of course, Tillerson.

And the news has just been made public!  Donald Trump has selected Tillerson to be his Secretary of State.

I am so proud, not only for my son's amazing achievement but also for the whole RS Aero Class.

In a brief statement, Mr. Trump explained his reasons for his choice of Tillerson to be the USA's top diplomat.

I have chosen one of the truly great sailing leaders of the world, Tillerson, to be Secretary of State. Tillerson is like, smart. Like me. He must be smart. All sailors are like, smart. But Tillerson sails an RS Aero. Not one of those Sunfish or Lasers that are made in China. That makes him like, super-smart. We need to make America great again and bring jobs back from China. We need super-smart players like Tillerson to make smart deals. The people we have making deals now are stupid. Tillerson has vast international experience. His mother was born in Australia. I love Australians. Australians are like, smart people. Tillerson will bring back 70,000 factories to the US and make Mexico pay for a huge wall to keep out the bad hombres. 

.

Trump Trump Trump and the America's Cup

This children's song (first recorded in 1956) was often played on the radio in England when I was a boy.

It has absolutely nothing to do with sailing, except that a sailor friend drew my attention to it. Nellie the Elephant is suddenly topical again because of its chorus line, "Trump, Trump, Trump."

That's all that seems to be on the news these days.

Trump, Trump, Trump.

"Klu Klux Klan plans parade for Trump."

"Trump may force all Muslims in the USA to be registered."

"Trump settles fraud case for $25 million."

Trump, Trump, Trump.

Can't we get back to the important stuff we used to talk about before the election like whether Caitlyn Jenner regrets not being Bruce Jenner any more, and why Tom Brady likes his balls soft?

On second thoughts... maybe not. I am really not all that interested in Tom Brady's balls.



The only bright spot in the news is that British sailor Ben Ainslie has led his team to victory over the Australian sailor Jimmy Spithill in the Louis Vuitton America's Cup World Series Superbowl Cup Final (or whatever it is called) which has been held in various locations around the world over the last decade or so. (Well at least it seems like it.)

Some sailors, a couple of cars and a pontoon boat.

Sadly this does NOT mean that the America's Cup will be returning to its rightful home in England. But apparently it does mean that Sir Ben and his team will have a two point advantage in the double secret round robin Louis Vuitton America’s Cup Qualifiers and Challenger Playoffs Elimination Round (or whatever it is called) which will be sailed over about 40 weeks next summer.

After Sir Ben has won the LVACQACPER (or whatever it is called) he will finally be allowed to give Jimmy Spithill and his Australian team another good drubbing in the actual America's Cup. And THEN the America's Cup will go back to England.

I think I got that right.

Too bad there isn't an American team in the America's Cup any more.

A waste of some perfectly good champagne

So before you go back to the real news and the steady diet of Trump, Trump, Trump here is a quiz for you.

Without googling it, what does Nellie the Elephant have to do with this song?

 

This news just in. Rumor has it that President Trump is considering adopting Nellie the Elephant as the theme song of his Inauguration.

Trump, Trump, Trump.

Caption Contest

Castello Scaligero Malcesine - Quiz

Tillerwoman and I are currently staying in Malcesine on Lake Garda in Italy.

That's Malcesine in the foreground in the picture. The prominent castle is the Castello Scaligero. It's been there an awful long time.

I am sailing in a little RS Aero regatta on the lake later in the week, but on Wednesday I did some husbandly sightseeing things with Tillerwoman.

In the afternoon we climbed to the top of the tower at the castle.



We are staying in a hotel on the lakefront a little further up the lake.

Captain JP of the eponymous Captain JP's Log suggested that we have a quiz about what Tillerwoman had for dinner.

OK.



What did Tillerwoman have for dessert at dinner on Wednesday this week, and what did she have to drink with it?

Clue #1: The dessert was green.

Clue #2: The drink was clear.

Blame Captain JP.

10 Wild, Wacky and Wise Things Said About the RS Aero This Week

Stuff found on the Internet this week...


1. I haven't had a demo. I just went for it because I got a good deal and everyone raves about the boat.


2. What is the cost per pound? About $100? Too pricey till a large used market develops, or you can pop one out of a 3D printer.


3. The boat is phenomenal and the people are great.....once you sail it, you will not want to go back to your Laser.


4. I know Melges is pushing a competing design but I like the look/weight of the Aero.


5. Somebody has to be the first RS Aero buyer in the area and it might as well be you.


6. When you compare the weight of an Aero hull with that of a Laser or Sunfish, all the Aero sailors were sailing half a boat.


7. I find the Aero’s early adopters inspiring. They saw a better boat and knew the soulful satisfaction it would bring.


8. Buy Aeros in threes.


9. Sometimes we just have to take a bigger leap of faith to see the light.


10. I, for one, welcome our new Aero overlords.

I Guess I Won't Be Getting an Invitation to His Inauguration?

What is going on?

Last week I made it big in Sailing World.

Next thing I know, Donald Trump is hating me on Twitter.

Wheels on the Bus

RS Aero racing on Lake Massapoag

Not last Sunday

On Sunday I went to scenic Lake Massapaog to do a spot of RS Aero racing.

Before the racing I met a new member of the club who owns a Laser Pico.

She explained to me that she was looking for something a bit more exciting than the Pico, and that someone had recommended she should check out the RS Aero.

Thank you "someone" whoever you are.

We had a good discussion about the RS Aero and the three rigs and the differences between the Pico and the Aero. Look forward to giving her a demo in the Aero one day soon.



Then I went off to race my RS Aero with my two fellow founders of the Boston Aero fleet.

I have to say they have become annoyingly fast over the summer. But that's OK. It's good to have training partners who are a bit faster than you, they say. Whoever "they" are.

In two races, first one "friend" and then the other "friend" basically took me out of the race on the start line. But that's OK. I need to learn to be more aggressive on the start line.

In the other race, my cunningham came out of its slot and I had to stop to do emergency repairs. But that's OK. I need to learn to remember to tuck the tail of my cunningham under that little bit of shockcord whose sole purpose is to keep the cunningham from coming out of it slot. Duh!

I sorta kinda had a chance some times to go as fast as my friends upwind, but downwind they were much faster than me. But they are skinny, scrawny kids who are respectively at least 20 and 40 lbs lighter than me, not to mention a couple of years younger. So it's just physics. I should sail my 9 rig next time and show them what a fat old dude can do.

So I mellowed out and sang a few verses of Wheels on the Bus while I was sailing and enjoyed sailing on one of the prettiest lakes in New England in the coolest boat on the planet.

Life is good.

Captions Please

What is going on here?

Surely you can think of a good caption for this photo?

In case you hadn't spotted it, the boat is an RS Aero. Everyone likes to make fun of RS Aero sailors.

And the cyclist is French. Everyone likes to make fun of the French.

Reasons to go to 2017 Laser Masters Worlds - #3 See-Through Toilet Doors

Continuing our series of reasons to go to the 2017 Laser Masters Worlds in Adelaide, assuming they will be in Adelaide which may just be an Internet myth but they ought to be in Adelaide because I am finding all sorts of cool reasons to go to Adelaide...

#3 is so you can check out the see-through doors on the toilet stalls at the pub in the Kent Hotel in Adelaide.

Yes, apparently it's a real thing.

The whole joint sounds like a pretty wild place because it also has a jungle (above) and a dunk tank.

Supposedly the theory is that the stall doors cloud over when you lock them. But at least one reviewer says they didn't work on the day they were there (or perhaps ever?)  And I also found one report that said they only cloud over to be opaque one way so you can see out while you are sitting on the toilet but nobody can see you.

Hmmm!

Is this one of those tall stories that Aussies like to tell unsuspecting Poms and Yanks?

Sadly I couldn't find any pictures online of the see-through toilet doors at the Kent Hotel. I guess Aussies are too shy to take selfies in public bathrooms.  But apparently other places do have something similar.


 


These ones are at the Cafe Diglas in Vienna.

But who wants to go sailing in Vienna when you could be sailing in Adelaide?

Why I Changed My Name This Weekend

I have been called lots of things in my 67 years on this planet.

My parents gave me a first name which I have never liked very much.

I do have a middle name but I like that even else.

At the school I attended from ages 10 to 17 - what was known as a grammar school in England - I was called by my last name. That was the way in boys' schools in England in those days. That was OK. I have a nice simple English last name which only Americans manage to spell wrongly.



My wife has called me all sorts of things but we don't need to go into that.

I have been called all sorts of things when racing my Laser too.

And here in the blogosphere I go by Tillerman, of course.



Ten years ago, I became Granddad and I thought that was the coolest name ever.

Until this weekend.

We have been in Connecticut celebrating the 2nd birthday of my youngest grandchild, Juliet. That's her on the right in the photo with her big sister Isabel.

Juliet is talking up a storm these days, learning new words and expressions almost every day it seems. Perhaps it was the kids' TV program we watched together about circles and squares and rectangles, and concepts like small, medium and big, but whatever the reason she suddenly decided to call me Big Granddad!!!

It is true that I am a few inches taller than her other grandfather, and Juliet is a very observant child.



I do like my new name.

I am Big Granddad.

Who are you?

Very British Problems - How I Failed to Meet a Very Famous Sailing Blogger

Hello, my name is Tillerman and I suffer from Very British Problems.

For those of you who are not Very British, or who have been living under a rock for the last few years or both, Very British Problems is one of those modern media phenomena that started a few years ago as a Twitter feed and which then quickly spawned a book, a TV series, a clothing line and god knows what else.

Very British Problems is all about what makes us British people different from normal people like Americans and Australians - such as our extreme modesty, our amazingly polite manners, our obsession with the weather, and especially our awkwardness in dealing with pretty much every kind of social interaction. All the things that make normal people love us so much.



One of my Very British Problems is not having a clue how to react when I see a Very Famous Person in a public place.

Assuming I recognize who it is (which 87% of the time I don't) what am I supposed to do?

Very Famous Person 

I saw in Logan Airport in 2014 

but I had no idea of

what his name was 

or what his latest record was called

Am I supposed to (Option A) rush up to them and give them a big hug and say how much I liked their latest movie, song, book, political rant or whatever is appropriate for the field in which they are Very Famous? Doesn't this happen to them something like 500 times a day and aren't they totally annoyed when you are the 501st person to do that to them today and they are forced to mutter something along the lines of, "So pleased you liked it." Wouldn't they rather you just left them alone?

Or (Option B) is it more appropriate to just make eye contact and give a little nod of the head and a smile to indicate you know who they are and know better than to annoy them by rushing up and making gushing comments about their latest piece of work?



One of the first times I came across this issue was when I almost literally ran into Prince Charles. He was lucky enough to be spending a couple of years studying at the same university as me and we crossed paths when he was coming out of a local bookshop and I was going in.

There are probably special rules for how to great Very Famous Royal People which makes things even more complicated. And in any case if you are going to adopt option A above, what are you supposed to tell a Very Famous Royal Person you like about their latest work? Especially this one who actually did even less work than other Very Famous Royal Persons because he was just a student like me?

"I like that nice suit you're wearing, Your Royal Highness - but why don't you dress in jeans and a raggy old sweater like the rest of us?"  I don't think so.

Or perhaps, "Hi Charlie - I'm a big fan of the whole royal family thing - how are the corgis - say hi to your Mum for me." That doesn't seem entirely appropriate either.

So I just pretended I didn't recognize him.

Probably just as well really.



And then there was the time I was quietly having breakfast on the restaurant terrace at the Bitter End Yacht Club a few years ago and Richard Branson came zooming up in a big swanky speedboat (he owns a couple of the nearby islands and stuff) and he walked right past me into the restaurant.

What was I supposed to say?

"Hi Sir Richard - sorry about your house burning down. Hope you had good insurance!"

"Hi Dicky - love this whole space thing you're doing - how do I sign up to go to Mars?"

My mind was a total blank.

So I decided to be Very British and opted for a subtle version of option B. The briefest of eye contacts. (I think he probably recognized me too. Probably reads my blog.) And a very slight smile that clearly indicated, "I know who you are but I choose not to invade your privacy because I understand what a bore it is being very famous and insanely rich."

I think he appreciated my Very British solution to the dilemma.




So last December when Tillerwoman and I were standing in the immigration line at Beef Island airport on Tortola and I spotted a Very Famous Sailing Blogger and her family a few places ahead of us in the line, I had no idea how to react.

Immigration line

Not actually the one at Beef Island

As well as all the usual Very British Problems associated with approaching Very Famous People in public, there were two other complications to the situation.

Number 1 - and most significant - is that we were standing in a line - a queue as we Very British People call it. And we Very British People have a whole huge set of Very British Problems about the etiquette of queues. Most important of all is the commandment that THOU SHALT NOT JUMP THE QUEUE. As a Very British Person I was almost certainly physically incapable of stepping out of the line and going to chat with a person several places ahead of us in the line. I would be feeling that everyone else in the queue would be deeply offended because they would think I was "jumping the queue" and that is something that Very British People never do.

Number 2 - was that I am also a sailing blogger - but nothing like as famous as the Very Famous Sailing Blogger.  I know who she is but does she have a clue who I am? Does she read my blog? Has she ever left a comment on my blog? My mind is a blank. The answer to these questions is very important. Depending on the answer it will make a difference to my opening remarks.

Do I introduce myself as an anonymous fan, or rush up to her and shout, "Hi! I'm TILLERMAN!!!" which would be about the stupidest thing to do with several dozen strangers watching us and listening to me if the Very Famous Sailing Blogger had no idea who the hell I was.

While I am pondering these issues, the Very Famous Sailing Blogger reaches the front of the queue and starts what looks like a very complicated conversation with the Immigration Officer presumably about the immigration status of her and her mother and her three beautiful little daughters. So I figure I will wait until we are both through Immigration and then sidle up to her in the baggage hall and start a quiet conversation with an opening gambit along the lines of, "Hi, aren't you Brittany from Windtraveler?" and compliment her on the good behavior of her three little girls because they really were being amazingly good. I think even a Very British Person could manage that.

But before I get the chance to make my move, BVI Immigration escorted the Very Famous Sailing Blogger and her mother and her three beautiful little daughters off to one of those rooms that they have in every Immigration Department in every airport in the world which you always hope you never see the insides of because who knows what they do to you in there?

And I never saw her again.

And that is how this Very British Person failed to meet a Very Famous Sailing Blogger.



PS If you ever see me in real life, please feel free to rush up to me and give me a big hug (especially if you are female) and tell me how much you love my latest blog post (even if you can't remember the title or what it's about.) I won't mind. Really.

Reasons to go to 2017 Laser Masters Worlds - #2 Pie Floaters

Doesn't that look delicious?

It does indeed.

But what is it, Tillerman?

That, my friend is a "pie floater."



According to Wikipedia (which is never wrong) the pie floater is an Australian dish particularly common in Adelaide. It commonly consists of a traditional Australian-style meat pie, usually sitting, but sometimes submerged (sometimes upside down) in a bowl of thick pea soup. It is usually garnished with tomato sauce.

Apparently Anthony Bourdain, Billy Connolly and Joe Cocker are high profile fans of the pie floater.

Well, Joe Cocker was a big fan of pie floaters before he died a couple of years ago. As far as I know nobody ever conclusively proved a connection between Mr. Cocker's death and his consumption of pie floaters.



The pie floater in the photo at the top of this post is from Vili's Café in Adelaide, Australia. (How did you guess?)

And when I go to the 2017 Laser Masters Worlds in Adelaide I am definitely going to Vili's Café to enjoy a pie floater.



Can you believe it? Some of the Anonymous commenters on my blog have been casting doubts on my assertion that the 2017 Laser Masters Worlds will be in Adelaide.

How dare they?

Do I question your faith?

A Fork in the Road

A fork in the road.

This is not photoshopped - even though I know it looks like it could be.

I really did pass this on the way to the Archipelago Rally in Westport, MA last year.

Did I ever tell you how I (almost) won the Archipelago Rally?

Hey Mr. Aero-Man

Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
I'm just jealous and there is no place I'm going to
Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
In the sailing blogosphere I'll come followin' you.

Though I know the former empire is turning into sand
Vanished from the land
Left me blindly here to stand
But still not sleeping.

My weariness amazes me
I'm stranded on the beach
I'm much too old to teach
This ancient empty crowd's too dead for dreaming.

Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
I'm just jealous and there is no place I'm going to
Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
In the sailing blogosphere I'll come followin' you.

Let me take a trip upon your brand new shiny ship
My ratchet block's been stripped
My hands can't feel to grip
My toes too numb to hike
Wait only for my boot heels to be wandering.

I'm ready to sail anything,
I'm ready to upgrade
I'll even do a trade
Cast RS Sailing's deal my way
I promise to consider it.

Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
I'm just jealous and there is no place I'm going to
Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
In the sailing blogosphere I'll come followin' you.

And we all can hear wiser voices
Saying my old boat is done
This old tub is such a yawn
I'm just looking for more fun
And I have no idea why I've lost the joy in racing.

And if you hear vague traces
Of voices bleating in the wind
Saying you're too fast for him
It's just some losers way behind
I wouldn't pay them any mind
It's just a wave that I'm seeing that I'm chasing.

Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
I'm just jealous and there is no place I'm going to
Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
In the sailing blogosphere I'll come followin' you.

Then take me Aero sailing
On endless screaming planes
Without any hiking pains
It's easier on my knees
And way more fun in breeze
Out to the windy beach
Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow.

Yes, to sail beneath the diamond sky
With one hand waving free
Silhouetted by the sea
Surrounded my friends
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves
Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
I'm just jealous and there is no place I'm going to
Hey Mr. Aero-man sail your boat for me
In the sailing blogosphere I'll come followin' you.

The Boat Races - and Wellington Boots

Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, Tillerwoman and I were able to watch the Boat Races today on American TV only about 6 or 7 hours after they actually happened. They were shown on the Universal Channel which, according to Wikipedia is "a television channel specializing in movies and television series in the thriller, drama, comedy, horror, crime and investigation genres."

I am not sure which of these genres the Boat Races are classified in, but they are certainly a "series" as the men's University Boat Race has been held 161 times going back to 1829. A bit older than the America's Cup you should note.

What is even more amazing is that my own alma mater, Cambridge University, has qualified for the boat race finals in every one of the 161 times it has been held. A bit better than the New England Patriots record in making the Superb Owl you should note.

Anyway, the program on the Universal channel - in line with its reputation for horror series - first of all showed the plucky ladies from Cambridge almost sinking on their way to a honorable second place in their race.

And then on to the men's race featuring Cambridge and some other dudes.

I must admit both Tillerwoman and I very much admired those fetching Wellington boots that the Cambridge men wore when launching their boat, and again while spraying each other with champagne at the awards ceremony. I can just see me wearing some boots like this when launching my RS Aero at Massapoag Yacht Club.

Apparently "The Official Men's Cambridge Boat Race Boots" can be bought for only £100 at this website but it doesn't say if they deliver to the USA or if £100 is the price for one boot, or a pair.

I did point out to Tillerwoman that I would look even more fetching if I had a pair of those matching pale green tights worn by a couple of the Cambridge men in the photo at the top of this post. Not to mention that they would be very convenient for protecting my sensitive parts from the very rough anti-skid on the RS Aero. Tillerwoman didn't seem to share my enthusiasm for this option.

Anyway, be that as it may, Cambridge beat the other dudes... making it a very happy Easter.

For anyone interested in my own Cambridge rowing career, check out My Rowing Career.

Palma Roll

People say the Laser is an old design, but there's something new every year in Laser technique.

Have you learned how to do this yet?

The Burning of the Socks

It will soon be time for the Burning of the Socks.

Are you ready for it?

Sailing Without My Trousers

There is no doubt that I am beginning to forget things as I get older.

A few months ago I was convinced I had lost my wallet along with all the stuff in it like cash, debit card, credit cards, driving license and really important stuff like my US Sailing Membership Card. I went to all the trouble of calling the liquor store where I thought I might have lost it, notifying the police, notifying my bank and credit card companies, getting a replacement driving license, and of course notifying US Sailing. Then a few weeks later Tillerwoman found my wallet in a drawer in the dining room - a different drawer in the dining room from where I normally put my wallet so I won't forget where I put it.

I must have forgotten which was the drawer where I normally put my wallet so I won't forget where I put it.

When I am blogging I sometimes forget how to spell words like defense, aluminum and analyze.

When I go sailing I sometimes forget to check the tide.



But on the Sunday before last I did something I have never done before.

I forgot to put my trousers on when I went sailing.



The usage of the words "pants" and "trousers" is a bit different in American English and Real English. So let me explain for my three American readers.

In Real English "trousers" are an item of clothing worn from the waist to the ankles, covering both legs separately.

In American English this item of clothing is called "pants."

Whereas in Real English "pants" means underwear.

 Pants

Trousers

I didn't go sailing without my pants. I went sailing without my trousers.



No, wait. Those pictures are a little misleading.

When I go sailing in the winter (defined as any time between October and April in these parts) I usually wear three layers, a Gill drysuit and underneath two layers

1. Long thermal underwear - pants.
2. Highly technical "mid layer" sailing clothing from Gill - trousers.

My Gill highly technical mid layer trousers are a few years old. The current equivalent Gill highly technical mid layer trousers are these...

Gill highly technical mid layer trousers

According to the Gill website these trousers have "a smooth technical face fleece with a brushed waffle interior providing excellent stretch and warmth while incorporating wicking and breathable properties." Gill call them "Thermogrid" trousers.

Don't they sound toasty?



Anyway, a couple of Sundays ago I went down to Newport and rigged my Laser and put on all my sailing gear and launched my Laser into the frigid waters of Narragansett Bay. And then on the sail out to the start line I noticed a strange coolness in my nether regions - not to mention a distinct lack of padding in my nether regions - and realized I had forgotten my trousers.

No brushed waffle interior. No smooth technical face fleece.

I have no idea how I forgot to put on my trousers.

I may be getting old.



Of course it wasn't as embarrassing as, say, going out to a restaurant without my trousers. Or even going to the mall without my trousers. Or riding the Underground (subway in American English) without trousers.

No Trousers Day on London Underground

I was wearing my drysuit so none of the other sailors could see I was sailing without my trousers. So I decided to tough it out. What's a bit of cold in the nether regions?



I didn't sail well that day.

I only had one good start and that turned out to be a general recall. (Why does that always happen?)

I seemed slower than the rest of the fleet and was making bad technical and strategic decisions.

I couldn't really blame it on not wearing my trousers.

Or could I? I have heard some women claim that men's brains are not in their heads, but instead they are in a part of the body normally kept warm by trousers.

Maybe some women are right?

---

On Monday last week I went sailing by myself in Newport.

I remembered to put on my trousers.

It was a very pleasant hour or so of light wind practice.

---

Yesterday I didn't feel like going racing with the Newport Laser fleet.

I can't remember why.

Has my bad experience of sailing without trousers put me off Laser racing?

Am I pining to get back in the RS Aero?

I forget.

What is your most embarrassing moment of forgetfulness?

12 Styles of Hiking in a Laser

Here's a fun video demonstrating twelve different styles of hiking in a Laser.

Thanks to @finalbeatsail and @RoosterSailing for sharing this on Twitter.

What is your preferred Laser hiking style?

I See No Icebergs

Captain JP, himself an intrepid sailor of Arctic regions, asked me in the comments to yesterday's post for some photos of RS Aero sailing "in proper icy conditions where there are bergs in the water."

Well, I've spent at least three minutes searching the Interwebs and I can't find any.

The nearest I can come are these two photos.

The first one is of my friend launching an RS Aero in Newport Rhode Island last March.

And the second one is from some guy in Norway who had to outdo my friend by posting this picture of his RS Aero.

No icebergs to be seen.

But I did accidentally come across this picture of Kate Upton (whoever she is) taken on a ship in Antarctica where she had some photos of herself taken on the snow for some magazine called the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue.

According to Wikipedia, which is never wrong, "Feminists have expressed that the Swimsuit Issue promotes the harmful and dehumanizing concept that women are a product for male consumption."

And that's all I have to say about that.

Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible.