Grandpa and Grandmas. Grans and Gramps.

"Ruby Rhino" and the "One Two Red Blues"

this is my sweet mom playing "Ruby Rhino" and "One, Two, Red, Blue" with our boys. They really love it. They really lover her.

Pass it Along!

When I started reading about permaculture, I was excited and yet...a little overwhelmed. Overwhelmed, because I knew that in a few months time- we would have saved enough money to finish our backyard. But, a few months was not enough time to know what we wanted to do, and why.
To my surprise, after a google search, I was pleased to find a legit, experienced, permaculture landscaping company right here in Utah! And I want to share it...
If you are interested, here is his website!

http://sagesway.net/

We hired him, and would recommend him to others.

Pass it along!

Finished at last!

I passed the MBLEX, the "Comp", and have officially graduated from school!
Aaaaaaaahhhhhh.
That means, I am a Licensed Massage Therapist!
That means, I know what psoriasis is, where bile is stored, which chamber of the heart pumps blood to the lungs, and what really causes a brainfreeze! I know how to manually move lymph fluid, ease edema, and help relax a hypertonic muscle. I know how to work out "knots," and the name the bone and attachment of every muscle in the body. I know the Oriental meridians, and Ayurvedic chakras.That means, I got everything I wanted from my schooling!

I am proud to be an LMT.
And excited to break some of the misconceptions of what that means.

And...this means, after 15 months, we get our nights back!
Yaaaaaaaaahhhhh!
aka: I get to snuggle in bed with Brandon before we drift to sleep.
I get to go to bed by 10:00...or 9:00...or 8:00!!!
I get to put our kids to bed without a nightly "pass-off."
I get to live, practice, and experiment with what I have learned.
I get to someday write down the volumes of thoughts about health that I have had churning.
I get to give a gift that helps ease another's pain.
And love my career.
I get to go into hibernation for awhile.
And start gathering the licensing to work out of my home, when the boys are in school next fall.
I get to dig my toes into the dirt, and take care of our plants this spring!
And enjoy the best summer of our lives (without a thought of homework)!
I want to shower Brandon with gratitude.
Because it would have been absolutely impossible
To complete or even attempt school without his most loyal support.

I am so grateful and happy.

MBLEX

2 days until I take the MBLEX!
Not nervous or anything.

happy birthday baby benny.

When an Apple is not an Apple

I once watched a television program about the challenges in Ethiopia.
It aired images mothers holding their starving children.
Little bundles of skin wrapped bones that looked intently into their mother's faces seeking nourishment. And yet these women had nothing to give them.

My heart broke, imagining such a predicament.
What those mothers must have felt like!
I stored it away, deep within my soul.

A few years ago, I looked into my own children's eyes. At the time had two, "healthy," darling boys. DJ, at the time, was 2 years old. His bright and compassionate eyes could draw in a stranger. Yet, below, were weighed with shadows... literally. Grayish, half moons sunk his skin. Well child exams reported that all was well. But I felt uncomfortable. Something was wrong. Eventually his difficulty breathing, and itchy skin at night sent us to an allergist. And the results shocked me.

Wheat. Corn. Dairy. Oats. Peanuts. Cats. Pollen. Grass. "Air"...

He was allergic to America.

The irony began. That although I lived in one of the richest, most developed nations in the world, I couldn't find food. And just a few miles away was a building full of it. My child looked into my eyes, three heart wrenched meals a day, and I had "nothing" to feed him. Or, in other words, I didn't know how to feed him. Did you know flour is in all of my home-baked, personal comfort foods? Pasta, waffles, tortillas, bread, pizza, muffins, cookies, crepes, birthday cake...out of the question. And that corn syrup- is in just about everything. Oats takes out 99% of cold cereals, (and oatmeal of course.) Dairy knocks out icecream, cheese, milk, yogurt - and all of the wonderful products that are topped or prepared with these things. Soy is damaging in excessive amounts for boys. And, over time we found that DJ would start developing intolerance to some of our trusty substitutes! This, by the way didn't even begin on the long list of long-named, trusty preservatives that aids our retailers in preserving the appearance of our food. Mac & Cheese, for example...instant rash, and a volcano of mucous...every time. And even in my trusty fruits and vegetables. I soon discovered the consequence of the genetically modified. I found myself strolling the grocery store isles, like I was in a scene of the "Labyrinth," and I was as crazed as David Bowie. It felt like an illusion.

An apple was not an apple.

It looked delicious. Plump, crisp, and red spotted with luscious drops hose-sprayed droplets...
And yet the nutritional value and compatibility to our bodies was and is changing. Could it sustain life? For some time. Could it sustain disease? Without an end.

It was depressing to me. Diets, budgets, and emotional connections to things don't change overnight, but mealtime incessantly arrives. And my 2 year old's body was already showing signs of toxicity. It takes time to find new foods. You have to find them. Buy them. Prepare them. Store them. And convince that 2 year old that that dense, dry crust of a bread can actually be eaten. And convincing everyone, including myself, that there is nothing unusual about bring our own "special" foods to every social gathering. It made me sad.

It was asinine.

The solution? Regular visits to get the "pokeys," and a lifetime membership of Zyrtec.
Cured.

What about many of my friends children that are starting to experience the same conundrum? What about our children's quality of life in the future?
What about our connection to true life-giving substances?
It feels as though it is slipping through our fingers, like desert sand.
But, I refuse to let it.

Eating wasn't supposed to be this hard.

say ahhhh!

night night benny.

like a weed.

wow. my kids are getting tall. keeping flood-free pants in the house can be a challenge. it is fun to see what their genes are cooking up...

#24. Happy Thanksgiving!

This is my favorite holiday! The very best one. Gratitude is so vibrant and living! It is one of the most bonding gifts, and so much fun to have. Gratitude improves everything, every time. Gratitude makes life blossom. And sheds light in to the deepest, darkest abyss. Those crevices that forgot light was possible. It comes from within, for that which is without. And transforms both. It is powerful. And wonderful. Thanksgiving is happy!

#23. Marraige.

I believe in marriage. I believe it works. I believe it is good. I believe that a relationship can be fruitful, peaceful, and kind. I believe in dreaming big. Love is not what I thought. But better. I believe that living as a married person is not the same as living single. And working to unify with Brandon has brought more growth and joy to my life than anything else. This picture was taken over 10 years ago, before ours, back when I could only hope. I am grateful to Brandon for all the lessons of love I have learned through his wonderful companionship.

#22. Good Friends.

I am grateful for you, my friends.

#21. Turkey Trouble.

Turkey will forever remind me of one of the greatest moments of my life. Or one of the funniest. I bum Costco trips with my mom. And one magnificent day, while loading our groceries onto the automatic conveyor belt- Mom's shirt button snagged the packaged turkey's netting when she leaned her bounteous bosoms across the belt. Off she went! All... the way... to the end. A free, and wonderful ride.

#20. Rog & Tricia

It is a rare occasion in life to be blessed with an aunt and uncle like Rog and Tricia. I feel they are like my own eldest siblings. And I admire them greatly. Roger's dry wit can happily make an uncomfortable person more uncomfortable, and a comfortable person chuckle. Tricia's acceptance, kindness, and down-to-earth nature makes me want to lay my head on her lap, and divulge all my life stories. They are parents to be honored, with children very dear. I will always remember the wonderful time at The Cape. Catching starfish and eels, and enjoying your friendship. You have a wonderful influence in my life. I love you both.

# 19. Grandma & Grandpa B

The stellar couple on the right are my grandparents. Oh, how I love them! My grandma is a wonderful home "maker." Their home is still one I love to be in. She has always been a support to me, and I am grateful to her for that. I can still smell wafts of homemade maple syrup coming out before the sunrise, and nabbing frozen o'henrys from their freezer. Grandpa ingenuity and proactive approach to life is still holding strong in his 80's. They are incredible sports, willing to humor any activity...including skydiving together last year. I made my first slingshot under Grandpa's direction, and want to finish memorizing "Sam Magee" to recite at his funeral someday. "Strange things done in the midnight sun, from the men who moil for gold..."

#18. Books.

I love books. I love the pages. I love the covers. I love the way they smell. I love their words. I love that each one is different. I love records. I love references. I love illustrations. I love to read. In the medical field, it is said that "if it isn't documented, it isn't done..." and when it comes to books- somewhere, someone wrote what was on their mind, and it is a done deal.

#17. Benny.

Bennett brought relief to our home when he was born. I am not sure how, but he did. And when he was born, that was my first impression. Relief. (On a deeper sense than from labor pains....) His spirit is joyful. His hair has curls. His nature is warming and pleasant. Lately, he asks "did this gwow?" at least 20 times a day. His first word was "tree." He loves his dad. He loves his brothers. And adds sweetness to our place. We love Benny.

#16. Our Street.

I am grateful everyday for our home. Our house is dreamy to me. It is our place of roots. It is our place of trees. It is our place to learn. And our place to heal. It is the place of togetherness. Of hammocks, and fruits. It is a place of neighborly love. I love it here.

#15. DJ.

This is DJ. If you want to know how he feels, take a peek into his eyes. His sincerity is transparent. Not an ounce of poker face. He loves to wrap up in layers of warm, fuzzy, soft things. This is how he makes you feel when you are around him. Warm, soft, and fuzzy. He is pleasant and comfortable. Our neighboor had a "moment of silence" the other day, in order to hear DJ's laugh. If you ever want some validation that your jokes are funny, tell DJ. His first word was "pi-der," and I once found him coddling, and having a conversation, to a spider in his hands. His intent for life is good and he is good to the core. When they put DJ into my arms the first time, I was filled with admiration. And I do. So much.