& my world will be coloured.

Thursday, March 31, 2005

End of another month...

Gonna be april soon, and two more weeks of attachment, will be out from this place. and back to study again. Kinda boring, but i do enjoy the time that i don't have to come school so early every morning, only to go home after 6pm. though no homework or nothing, just come and slack in school everyday. Tired, back ache. damn it.. my aunt haven't visit me. Maybe soon...

Rest well...

(joanne) ♥ 7:26 AM

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Cursed

Whatever it is, i don't wish to think anymore further. leave if you got to, cos i believe we are both exhausted.

(joanne) ♥ 6:22 AM

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Good FRIDAY

Yesterday was a great day, though a tired one. Cos i won $ in mj. well, win so much compared to those past few times i had played. so lucky of me, and of cos this make me smile.

Today, no program, so i guess just stay at home, and slack. well, had my dinner, finish up all the prawns, though im lazy to peel, and it stain my shirt, i just shower and change to a new set of clothes, and then it is dirty again. How clumsy of me. I better go get changed, before my shoulder smell of prawn.

Have a good weekend.

(joanne) ♥ 12:02 PM

Friday, March 25, 2005

Late for school

Waking up late means i will be late for school no matetr what. Spend 10 mins having my breakfast at home, since my mum bought, so no choice i gotta eat.. no matter what, give her face right?

Traffic lights beaten: 2
Camera: 1 (no flash)

I knew it, my phone will ring at 9.10am, cos my office clock is 9.15am at that time. and true indeed, it rang while i was already in school compound. didn't dare to be late for so long.. or else faces will really really change... to black color?

Step in the office, taking out my ear phone going in there, ot else i will spend more time taking out my stuff before i go to the front desk, and then they will think i am like not responsible.

Customer is always right, now i begin liking to work here, not cos of closing sales but customers are happy with my services, and they are nice too, though sometimes i meet some nasty ones. And over here i get to learn alot of things..

Going for lunch soon.. Hungry!

(joanne) ♥ 5:06 AM

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Nothing to do DAY

Raining just now, but now rain is over.

thanks to my friend, i just love her so much, the one that can help me do my stuff, without asking much. that's what friends are for. i owe her one.

Well, settle one case, with cheque on the way. another one might cancelled due to the very high price that the airline quoted, not my fault. very expensive, try to quote him other airline, but can't. well, shall wait for his call. made few mistakes defintely. regardless in natas or over work.

But today is so quiet, not like other day. maybe a rest day for me. ate nuggets, was complaining hungry, and since is raining, no customers. phone call...

(joanne) ♥ 9:15 AM

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Busy again

Though NATAS is over, but im busy still. what to do, cos its still the 1st week after natas over, the post natas offer. Managed to close 2 sales on sun, after talking much to customer, and then realise that i forgot to charge something. i think so, so forgetful of me. If the person come pay deposit tomorrow, omg.. my target will be $10k then.

Watch the movie, Robot.. wanna watch bogeyman, but supposed to watch together with my friends, but in the end never again, so didn't wanna watch, in case next time gotta watch with them.

Was supposed to do research but here i am typing in my blog. my gf ask me to read up more on books, but i rather read on travel destinations. and ask me not to spend so much time doing my blog, but it been a while since i last done my blog right? ha.. been busy this while.

Night night.

(joanne) ♥ 4:51 PM

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Crazy

Today the first day of the NATAS travel, somehow i was thinking did i ever regret to come into this TTC, when i got the chance to switch to other stopovers. Phone calls and enquiries have been driving me mad, depriving me of my food and love ones.

I miss her. It just seems like it been a while since i last saw her, talk to her. but did she ever know what i really feel? Only to recieve msgs that doesn't even look sweet, or anything.. everything just started to change, change to worse of course, when things ever change to the better for me? NEVER!

Something wrong in our relationship. I do feel that. I enjoy every fun i had. Go if you wanna to, but i will miss you.

IF you ever treat me right.

(joanne) ♥ 10:46 AM

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Hungry...

Now taking a short break before the briefing continue again.. well, it has been going on since morning. Didn't eat my breakfast. but had my lunch. and now, my stomach very hungry, but is bloated. something's wrong with it.

Been busy for the past few days, found a new interest. that's why i seldom call or meet you nowadays. and you told me to keep up the good work. Thanks for complimenting me, cos indeed it make you love me more, that's what i had felt, from those msgs you msg me. You seldom msg, i'm always the one taking initative, but this time round, its different. and i enjoyed that feeling..

Felt disgusted from what i had saw earlier, maybe that's why my stomach is aching. Still haven't get to do my project, the MMD, photoshop and flash. be doing it sometime this week. HOpe that i can finish in time before the dead line due.

Anyway.. im trying hard to get sleep, trying to get ample sleep before the big day come.

Missing you.

(joanne) ♥ 8:30 AM

Monday, March 14, 2005

Indecisive

Other matters.

I'm missing you, are you missing me?

Weather is very hot, so take care.

The furry soft coat chincilla on my neck.. Ticklish (that's what i'm scared of)
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

(joanne) ♥ 7:48 AM

Sunday, March 13, 2005

i'm still @ home

Its sat, and i'm still stuck here, but not to worry, be going out soon for dinner. Oh, just remembered my dad warns me not to use this comp again, cos of the comp hang this morning, and recieved numbers of call, asking me to come home straight after school. Was very tired, close none sales, i wouldn't say i'm lousy, cos i'm not like that, maybe i'm just not having luck, but once again.. i feel that my luck will be here soon, soon and i mean it.

My gf home playing mj, so we changed our outing to tomorrow, i will be shag, of cos. but is going out with her lor.. so how can be right? now i think i'm more cheena.. speaking in chinese most of the time, THANKS to my friends in TTC, they speak chinese most of the time. But then i still managed to use the chance to speak english at home, oh ya.. Btw, my verbal skills in chinese does improved, isn't that good? i'm just too smart for everything ya? :p

I forgot to settle a payment, and my dad must be thinking i'm taking the food for free again.. well, time to pay that bill, before he nags at me, taking away his stocks and then blamed me for those missing ones.

I gonna be late.

(joanne) ♥ 10:33 AM

It's gonna rain

With the supervisors beside me, here i am still typing my blog and surfing online. Tried to see where is the location of the GBC travel company, only to find out that is near my jap school. around bugis area, ohh..so its easy for me to go, at least i know which route to take. Will be pilloning a girl who i used to don't really like her, cos she used to be the admin and when i always late, then she like wanna deduct my hours. but now is okie. not that bad, can get along. sometimes first impression doesn't count after spending long hours with the person.

Suddenly, i look up but it seems sunnier and brighter. i bought a don pie black pepper one, which cost actually $15 but bought it for $10. At a reasonable price, but don't know if the food is nice. they say is nice. i tried. it hurt my stomach, cos is spicy. ate that for 2 mornings, nobody wanna eat, so no choice.

Another 1 hour and i will be off from job. Today, no sales for me. damn boring. no phone calls. can't use msn, or anything else, cos the supervisor saw, and was told not to use. Think i very forgetful, cos i always forgot where i put my flyers for the upcoming promotion. Always misplaced my stuff. Oh..damn..

Happy birthday Sherri..

(joanne) ♥ 4:00 AM

Thursday, March 10, 2005

What does it say..

Some people are plain weird, funny. People change very fast, maybe the temper, the way their character is, but we shouldn't blame ourselves for that,cos i believe its our nature. Just like you, a moment you can be very sweet, a moment can be very bad. planning about going rome with me.. or i should say your juliet. and me with my romeo. and i don't even intend to go there with romeo.. cos you're not romeo... does romeo even exists? maybe thousand years ago. Its in my literature book. i read that, and watched that movie. Not really fascinating, but is still watchable. As for me, i prefer to do what the romans do. Like travelling on Vespa looking at scenery? that should be real awesome. You said you're gonna work, and yeah.. you will be. and there's where you shall save the money for electronic gadget and of cos our holiday trips. Be it melbourne or rome. and next stopover... Prague. Its a place where one of the movie.. "passion of christ" took place in.. i guess so.

Ate real full today, my dinner like chilli crab, chicken rice, and more i guess. I always wanted to eat cereal prawns, but only to feel that its a waste of money, eating crab and prawns, cos i know you're running low. And our dinner always cost a bomb, i should say our outings always.. should i say i couldn't help it, or used to it?

(joanne) ♥ 3:39 PM

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Wasn't a day to live with at all..

I speed and get away, trying to throw my sorrows aside. I didn't think if it could cause a hurt to my life, cos when i did that, i could not think. Tears could not flow out from my eyes, cos of the wind. I wouldn't want it to flow out either, i told myself. Nothing came to my brain, except the things we left off. The way you say me, just reflect on the way your character is. that's what you had said just now. I can still remember. I wasn't even thinking of others, only the word you last said to me, which make me wouldn't even bother about the way i rode, cos everything of you just pisses me off, even little telephone calls. i don't care if you have to pay 20 cents for each drop call, but then no much money should be wasted. i rather let the phone ring, hear the music sing. I have never left you like this before, i guess its the very 1st time. you ought to learn your lesson, how to treat your girl right. I felt i wasn't even myself, when i gotta stop myself from calling you bbbbbbbb today at the table. It doesn't matter if i lose, it wasn't because of losing that's why i'm like this. You should have seen it earlier. You should have know what its coming. If you guess, everything is none of your fault, and i'm screwing myself here, let it be. cos i couldn't really bother anymore. You never understood what i felt.. never will anyone.

(joanne) ♥ 3:41 PM

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

A bad experience

Went to ssdc today, to enrol for my car. didn't remember to bring my i/c, never carry in my wallet for a while already, ever since i threw that billabong wallet aside, and use back my brown epi leather wallet. bought that few years back, but still in very good condition, maybe i didn't use for a while back then. Only brought my licence with me around, cos i felt that is more important, maybe sometimes the TP wanna stop me for illegal riding. Didn't lift up my leg today, and ooppies.. the TP saw, and look at me. only to realise thats part of dangerous riding.

The girl at the service counter was like, why didn't you bring your ic when you know you attend the briefing, you gotta bring ic or passport. pls, what the hell, when i didn't know until i went for the briefing. it has been a while since i last went ssdc, cos of the parking lot. but today, that's a parallel parking one, hope that lot can be mine always, so i don't have to worry about parking at the difficult spots, probability is like 0.6%. managed to book the peak period sessions which caused me coming to $70 for each session, and burn a big hole in my pocket. well, half of my savings are like gone. gonna spend thousands on it. The more i think of it, can't stand the counter girl, my gf was like.. you see people say cannot, then your face black. of cos la.. i wasn't happy at all with her like that. making a trip, wasting my time to listen to the 20mins briefing, which i felt was a waste. cant they just ask the counter staff, rather like have a briefing which wasted everyone's time?

But gonna look forward to this month end driving lesson. Heart will beat fast, hands will sweat, with the nervous & stress written all over my face.

(joanne) ♥ 2:56 PM

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Its weekend...

Which means weekday is approaching. Mon, gotta wear the company's t-shirt provided by school. Managed to ask some of my friends to get tickets through me, if its cheaper than other agency outside. Trying hard to get sales for myself, wonder how the satisfaction will be like.

I drop my helmet today, its just like having a crack in my heart. Got a scratch. ohhh... what the hell!

My auntie say i'm fat ever since she last saw me that day. i gotta watch my diet. talk to my gf about it while we were munching away in geylang the dim sum store. She say if i'm determined enough, she will also slim down. cos she doesn't have any determination, well.. and of cos i push to her, saying if she doesnt wanna eat, i will slim down too. Went McCafe as usual, every sat/sun weekend hangout place to sit down and chit chat, drinking my current hot fav-mochachinno. something like that. medium size and a slice of oreo cake. i was thinking where did i last eat that oreo cake, only just now could recall was at mccafe. That place was crowded today, maybe guess its sat. usually sun was quieter. My gf says she wanna have a kid, asking me to give birth, and get sperms from handsome guy. well, but i didn't wanna suffer the 9months only to find out that she wasn't with me. and i gotta look after the baby myself, which is very hard. I'm thinking negatively by the way. She only wanna look after when the baby is like not wearin diapers anymore, i wanna take care from that age too. Not only her.

I agreed to take up my driving licence finally, after she agreed to ferry me there. Though is near my school, i hate the bike parking area. its damn tough to reverse, when coming down from the lot. Gotta make a trip down to SSDC to check out the Trial theory test that i gotta take before practical i guess. No choice, my pocket gonna burn again. My mum hoping that i will give my bike up if she buys me a car. but it isn't cheap. bike cheaper alot def. I didn't wanna learn to drive so soon cos i got to run errand for them. My sis alwz blame me that having a bike is of no use to the family. im looking forward to the car driving lesson anyway.

wanna get a new hp soon, just remembered to check out for my gf and i the 3G hps. My bills finally arrive.

Stuffing my ears with MUSIC...

(joanne) ♥ 6:40 PM

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Tomorrow another day!

Gonna go back to school tml again for half day, listening to talks on australia packages. anyone wanna go? i'm trying hard to get sales. It isn't cheap, guess it will be hard to sell to my friends. Most of them just like shopping. Planning to go Rome one day, one of the countries in my list. Top of the list. Wanna travel about europe again, australia is fun too. maybe canberra, and melbourne, blue mountains. i like one, the grand canyon in states i guess?

I am always that confusing, running from points to points, halfway, incomplete. but i guess its me, i always say what i have in mind, didn't bother to think in any ways.

gotta wake up early tomorrow again, just can't wait for the day that i can sleep a while longer, though now i always take evening naps. i miss you, though its only a day since we last met. i overslept, and didn't wanna wake up for the prata feast we supposed to have just now. i didn't know that you're having something on, and won't be meeting me, if i know that.. i would have met you just now. You're busy with your games as usual.

nitey.

My feel: Being pissed= tears rolling down from cheeks

(joanne) ♥ 6:05 PM

Why can't be friends after break up?

i'm sorry if i wrote about this, its the past. i know that. but i just couldn't understand it. maybe due to the love songs they are playing now on class 95, making me recall back the past. i don't love you now, that's for sure. i might had love you in the past, when we were together. maybe i just needed to have someone at that point of time, and you came along. i thought a chance should be given, you deserved more than one. You were sweet, maybe too sweet to me, i took you more than granted, but it doesn't mean i need someone not sweet to me. Only to know that somehow we are not very compatible, i was wild, i needed someone to party with me. i was bored, i needed some kind of night life. but why am i not like this now? i rather stay at home, then go pubbing. i rather chose to be with you, spending quality moments together, then to go elsewhere with friends. my time are always yours. maybe its just due to a different kind of love.

I admit i love you, love you much since the past when we started to be together with each other. Love i guess is still the same, although trust is still not there, but somehow its increasing. The fear of losing you is coming back, or already back. i hate the feeling that you will leave me one day, hopefully not. i don't wish to see it coming, but if you really gotta leave, i got no choice. This time hopefully will not be like last time once again, i hate myself. I'll be your angel, this song really make me wanna tear. i'm getting pretty much emotional typing this.

I don't get it, maybe due to the attitude you gave me. i remembered you did tell me once that when i need help, i can get back to you. i didn't shun myself from you, you did. maybe the love is really gone, so there isn't any impact. i treat you as a friend, no more than that. i remember the very last msg you msg me, and till then i didn't wanna reply in any ways, cos i felt that there's no need to, from that bloody attitude you got there. and i guess its working well for you to forget me. :)

(joanne) ♥ 5:43 PM

Friday, March 04, 2005

2nd day @ TTC

1st day, wasn't that good. was falling asleep while the person's talking. too much things to absorb. quoting the correct fare, finding the right airline, is not easy.. same goes to everything. package to sell, which can cost more than 2000 bucks. new zealand & aussie package, sales target to meet at the upcoming NATAS fair @ suntec city on the 18-20 this month, and i am going to meet thousands of people. standing up for hours for these 3 days. yesterday was already tiring me out, i was sleeping while eating, and when i'm home. just too tired to think of anything. Like today, fall asleep while the tutor was helping other students doing the flash stuff.

Ate breakfast today, but don't know why i am hungry again. so fast, since about 10am, i'm starting to complain about my tummy feeling so weak. Have i eat mcdonalds this week? i don't think so, kfc have of cos, for two days.

Morning @ TTC wasn't that good too, learning about the packages of different airline companies. At this rate, we gotta come back on sat again, which i hate hate hate so much. Its just a dread to me, having to go back to school on sat. its weekend, a day which i thought i can sleep later. didn't have the mood to go school today, but i'm going to run out of MC days.

gonna lunch soon!

MY Mood: Tired

(joanne) ♥ 4:04 AM

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

I'm still working my way through..

Mistook that today was the handover, but it was actually later, which is hours away from now. Mistook because of the msg i save in my hp, i wrote it as 2-4, thinking it was tuesday, wed and thurs. damn. was so rush in school this morning, and now here, sitting till my buttocks hurt and back aching cos of my menses. this morning, i was still talking to my friends over breakfast about it, about me skipping this month, and now at night, it came. pisses me off, it came without me wearing my pad or liner, which i been wearing for those past few days, and deicded to give up after it never came ever since i stop popping the pills into my mouth. I thought the delaying menses pills will come 2 days straight after you stop eating it, but it didn't. Maybe because i consumed it many times, it work for me for the 1st three times, and not anymore. Maybe i should get the docs to change their prescription.

My dad blames me for all the computer hangs, cos i'm the one who surf all these websites, and msn. what the hell! Early in the morning, and its me. cos im the last to touch the computer last night. same goes for tonight. always the last... but it doesn't mean its me, just blame on the comp, that it just couldn't take it.

My buttocks hurts after all the 1 hour odd staring at computer doing my report! and of cos lastly, this blog.

i am thinking: am i still having another menses for this month, cos this one i'm having was last month one? .......

Today's feel: you make me feel like a snowball, cos whenever i see you, it just melts.

(joanne) ♥ 4:55 PM

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

its time to sleep again.

its midnight again. time to sleep soon, took my med, hoping this time can cure my sickness. been tired after the 1 hour of washing bike and waxing it. it doesn't make a diff. i didn't see any difference. but overall, its still a sense of satisfaction washing bike together with my gf. oh.. what an activity we ended up doing, but is fun. seeing who wash the fastest and whose bike is cleaner. my mood is just so short lived, after a while, felt so tired, so i just anyhow wax. erm, but it seems no diff, but after its dry, ha.. it looks shinning and defintely no dust and dirt. that's what i like.

My gf saw a dead fat rat while going into the kitchen, asking me to come over, i knew it is a rat, cos seen it a couple of times, but just didn't dare to go near it. At least she have the courage to throw it away though she claimed that she scared of it too, and she swept it with the broom and walked towards the dustbin, chasing after me with the rat. omg! and the words just suddenly came out. i say: 1 more time, and i will break up with you. i mean it. and after that, both of us are shocked. but i just couldn't stand. i don't like. i'm scared of the dead rat, its huge. but then she will not really throw at me. if she did, i think i will freak out and cry. Then she asked me if i really meant what i say just now, yeah, i guess so but not really after all. hee..

(joanne) ♥ 4:45 PM

Something came over me

today, didn't go to school, my cough is getting worse, didn't really have the voice to talk. didn't sleep for whole night until 7am this morning, couldn't get to sleep, been tossing and turning,hoping that i will get well. the med didn't help, so gotta see doctor today, ask for a stronger dose? don't know how did the presentation goes, miss it today, the individual one too. i already set alarm wanting to go to school, but just somehow my body felt so weak that i couldn't get up. slept till afternoon as usual like yesterday. Menses had been delayed, thanks to the med. i skip this month one, for the 1st time in my life. i didn't skip any before, i don't know how will it be. hope my body system is acting well.

Though im ill, got many things to settle at home, invoices and bills waiting for me. finally get to finish up some, before i can use the comp to do my personal stuff. the internet is tempting me, making me thinking what should i do first, or next. too many phone calls for me to settle, wishing that these calls will stop. it did only now. Everyone here at home is sick, virus do sure pass very fast.

Last day of the month..

(joanne) ♥ 10:54 AM