Learn From Matures

In this very dynamic world, where everything is almost working in a fast pace, it is very inevitable that dull and boring moments come across. How do you handle these times? Some go out and chill with friends. For bookworms, they satisfy themselves facing tons of books. And for sporty people, spend all the time in kicking. But what if your tired with what you are used to do?

One of my friends introduced me this kind of website. A very new way to spare your self from dull moments for you'll gonna talk to "mature" people. Yes, its a mature chat. Asking what you'll get in indulging yourself in this free mature chat? Maybe it is your first time to know this. But it is very undeniable that people like are experienced one. They have gone through a lot in this life. Which implies that advices is one of the benefits you can achieve. This free mature chat rooms are not only intended for mature ones. Anybody can enter and it is for free. Never let yourself die with dullness. Learn and be advised with the newest chatroom in the cyberworld. Learn while enjoying!

Looking for Cars?

Nowadays, cars are not just for showing-off. It is now a necessity that almost everyone want to achieve. And looking for cars, quality cars to be specific, is not an easy thing to do. It takes a lot of effort and trust for you to have your own dream car. As what I always say, I believe that internet has it all. So to help my readers achieved convenience in looking for cars, brand new or previously owned, I have searched the internet and looked for companies that offers cars. As always, internet never disappoint me. The site that stands out is this www.BuyYourCar.co.uk. What makes it excellent among other sites or companies is that it doesn't focus only on selling or on car leasing. It also offers search engines for your cars on where you can find valuable information. It even supplies independent car reviews and is linked into car loans and insurance companies. Because of its uniqueness and for its services offered, I personally recommend this site for those looking for cars. It is now up to you to believe.

pics from http://www.spectrum.ieee.org/images/apr08/images/cars01b.jpg

What's with Party?

me in green cap
Who doesn't love party? Of course, everybody does love party. Especially if you'll gonna spend the whole time with your closest friends, relatives or to anybody. A lot of people asked me and keep on asking me why I love going out and have some drinks when in fact a beer or any drink for that matter doesn't taste good at all? What I keep on telling them is that it is not the drinks that matter, its the people you with. Chit chatting with my friends is my best way to keep my stress out of me. And moment with friends is boring if you'll just have sodas and snacks, a beer is perfect. Thanks to my friends who are always there and ready to listen to all my murmurs...hehehe...Keep on rockin' guys!

Who Doesn't Know Harry?

Yesterday was a day of fun for me. Do you know my friend Harry? Yes Harry, Harry Potter. No, no, no, just kidding. Of course how on earth he'll know me. But everybody does. Well, who doesn't know him? Actually, I'm not really a fan of him. But I'm a person who loves adventure, travel and fun. When my classmates/friends invited to watch a movie of him in a cinema which is 88 kms away from the city we live, I never hesitated. I automatically said, of course why not. I don't follow his movies. In fact, I have only watched the first and the second book. But for fun sake, I went with them. It was a long travel and believe me, for one who loves travel, it didn't bore me. We arrived at the mall pat 12pm and the screening has already started. So what we did is we wait for the next screening which means will wait for almost 3 hours. So we strolled around the mall, took our lunch and strolled, and strolled, and strolled. It was tiring yet fun. My classmates/friends were so excited upon entering the cinema. How about me? Well, a bit...hehehe...To sum it up, it was full of fun. The movie was great and the day too.

Its Coming Up

pic from Angelofdeath341x

Oh my Gee! Few days form now, I'll become a year older. I only have few days left to enjoy myself as a teenager. It sounds very depressing for me. I'll be turning 20 and I feel like I'm so old already. Actually as usual, no plans for that day. I'm used to spend it at home feeling like it's a normal day. Of course, texts of greetings from my friends will fill my phone. Am I expecting? I hope I'm not...hehehe..Anyways, this is my first birthday that I have my blog. Will blogspot greet its bloggers like forums? I'm a bit excited but depressing really. I dunno why. Maybe it's because I'll never be called teenager. What's the good thing about beeing a teenager?..hehehe..A lot. Anyways, for those who haven't read my profile, my birthday is on July 17, that's Friday, party day. I hope that since this is my last birthday as a teenager, it'll be something very memorable, something special. I hope my friends will help me achieve this simple wish. And my personal wish is (secret)...hehehe..

Best Blog Award

I am so grateful that one of my friends gave this award. To be specific, I wanna thank LINGZ for this. And now that I'll be passing it to my friends, I got some names already on the list...hehehe...

And this award goes to....

Ate Meryl
ATENEAN101
Earl
Jelai
backdrop

If I Could Then I Would

I am not used to tell my dad "I love you!", hug him and tell him how important he is in my life. Yes, I am not that showy with how I feel towards my parents. But that doesn't mean that I never loved them, of course I do. Now that my dad departed. How can I tell or greet him "Happy Father's day Pa!". Yes, it's too late, very late indeed. Yes, I am full of regrets. If I could turn back the time, I would tell my dad how I love him, tell him that I am so sorry for all my mistakes, that I value all he have done. Only if I could. But, reality check, it's so impossible. Al I can do is to talk to him in prayers. It is too late I admit. I even wish that one night my dad will appear in my dream and we'll talk. I just really hope. So as an advice to all, show what you really feel towards your love ones. Coz, you'll never know, this moment is your last encounter with them. Never let that happen.

"THERE"

I miss my blog really.
I was lost again for almost four days in the blogging world for I was sick. At first I thought that it's just a simple fever than can be cured by self-medicating. A mistake that almost lead me "there". What I've learned from the experience is that I must live life right. Right in all aspects. Right in food, in manners, in valuing life and the likes. Thoughts like being not able to post again in this blog even crossed my mind. And that made me push myself to feel better. I wanna thank my friends, my text mates for being so cheering and consoling and who are still. Most of all, I wanna thank God, even if at first I doubt Him, for giving me another chance to live this wonderful life. Maybe if t9me will come that I'll really reach "there" what will I miss most aside from my family and friends, is this blog and my friends in this world. So take it from me, love life.

Time to Move On

After all the troubles and the tribulation that I and my family has faced, I still looked up and realized that I still have to move on. The best thing that had happened despite all, is that I knew who my really friends are, those who wiped my anxieties out and consoled me the moment I was so down. Time is very precious indeed. So precious that I must not waste it with just doing nothing. So to me, "Live Life!"And to those who love me and will always do, "Thank you!"

Our Grievest Moment

I'm so sorry guys if I wasn't able to update my blog for me and my family is grieving right now. After all the pains that my dad had felt because of his infirmity, he is now alleviated for he is now in heaven if there is. He spent three days in the hospital crying because of deadly pain. Last Friday, May 22, 2009, it all ended and my father died. It was one of the saddest moment if not the saddest time of our life. We were not expecting that he'll die that soon. That time was full of tears and condolences from relatives and friends. I felt darkness. I felt despair. I felt helpless. This coming Saturday, May 30, is the burial of my father and I am not attending. I couldn't dare to see my mom crying, my brothers and sister grieving. I dunno where will I spend my Saturday. I'm still puzzled.

Dad in the Hospi

I missed my blog a lot. For almost a month of not posting any, I am now in my classmate's house, using his PC and connection just to visit my blog.
We are now in one of the saddest moments in our life. Early this morning, my father was rushed in the hospital. He got no sleep because of severe pain. His body is bloated and he really looks like he's losing hope. I got a phobia with hospitals, so I dunno how to face that fear now that I really have to visit my dad. I dunno how to cheer my father and the whole family up. Even myself, I dunno how to console. Only few of my friends know my situation and I am thankful to those who extended their sympathy and prayers. I dunno til when will I be strong to take this all.

How Hard

Behind my bubbly look are difficulties, hardships and struggles that I am trying to conceal. A lot of people say, it is us who made choices in our own life. That it is up to us if we wanna live it joyfully or in any other way. But I tell you, if you’re in my shoes, you’ll really say that it’s not only you (us) who’ll make your life, because if it’s only me who’ll gonna make choices, then I’ll always choose the best option.

How can I be really happy if whenever I got home, all I can hear is my father’s struggle with his infirmity? That I am so helpless and couldn’t even alleviate his pain. I’d even rather stroll outside than seeing my family crying because of helplessness. Yes, believe it or not, I may not look or sound one, but I belong to those Filipinos living below. I’ve been so very grateful still for I got friends (Yvette, marky and augrae especially) who’re there, letting me use their PC for this blog, lending me some penny if needed and best, listening to me if I need some ears. The question is, if all of these are just trials, when will it end? I even think that it is no longer a trial but a picture of how’s life is unjust. I really hope that I could stand with all of these and not fall in despair. I got a new bestfriend, who really listen to me and makes me feel lighter, this BLOG.

"I'll March, For My Dad"

You know what guys why I am dying to do anything just to march in the isle and step up myself onto the stage?

If I were to ask, I'll never hurry myself in order to graduate on time. Because what matters most to me is the quality of the education I have. It doesn't mean that if I'll receive my diploma on the prescribed period of time, then I'm well-equipped and prepared enough to face the world of employment. I know myself better that anybody does, and that of I believe that I still need more time to feed myself with ideas and education related to my course. But, why is that I'm pressuring myself to march this April? The answer is that, "IT IS ALL FOR MY DAD".
My dad has been diagnosed with cancer when I was still in junior high. That was one of the most devastating turning points in our family. We have to look strong even if deep inside we're dying. We have to look happy, even if were saddened. That's how we fake ourselves just to make every moment with our dad happy. The doctor guessed that my father has only 5 years to live. Therefore, this year is his 5th year. Though it is hard to admit the painful fact, but I have to. I know that my dad also hide the pain that his infirmity caused. But I can feel and sense it in his eyes. The moment he bleeds, my heart bleeds too. I promised to myself that I'll make him proud of me. I'll let him see his son marching on the isle getting his diploma. It will be my very gift to my dad before the moment of conviction comes. But I don't think I can give it. I don't know how to say this to him. I don't want to give him more worries. And I know I can never hide it from him the way I hide my true emotions. I just hope that he'll never leave us without seeing me graduating. My only pray.

I Promise

This day is so great for me. No frowning nor dull moments. It's just that I was so happy, "never-minding" all the stressors that I got inside. So I came to think that if I made this day to be a joyful one, why won't I make my every day more joyous than today? Why not opt to be happy and forget all the worries and anxieties and just think of something happy? So from now on I promise to be not so "emotional". I really swear I'll be. It's better to wear a genuine smile than faking it. I don't know if tomorrow this promise will be kept. But my another promise is, I'll try my best to keep it. It's now time to help myself and enjoy every bit of my moment. Never mind all the problems for I believe we all humans have it. It's just a matter of severity or chronicity and of course the way we handle it. Now that I realized that it's all about choices. I promise to be the most jolly person you'll ever know.

Suicide Attempts

Why am I feeling this way?
Let me ask you, is it normal to think about ending yourself, committing suicide? Maybe you'll say, no, it's not. Loneliness kills me. I can't handle problems. I have a lot of anxieties. I can always remember what my Psychology teacher said, that there is really something wrong with me. Well, of course I believe I'm not insane. It's just that I always think of ending my life whenever I'm alone and my mind is loaded with problems, lots of problems.
But I am doing my best not to think about it. I always mingle with my friends even if I don't feel it. It's just that I can't help it. I really don't know how long can handle this thoughts and not do acts that will devastate me. I'm still hopeful that as I get more mature, all this thoughts will be buried into the deepest pocket in my memory and whenever I'll remember it, I'll just laugh about it.

I'm Alone

I woke lousy this day. I don't even feel like going to school. I can't explain it but I felt like I haven't eaten for a whole week for I really don't have energy to do my daily routine. But you know, even if I felt that way, I still went to school or else I'll end up listening to my mom nagging. In school, I felt very alone even if my classmates are around me. I don't know if this is a sign of insanity, which I hope is not. Or it is just simply a part of lousy day. But what is the best thing is I survived the day. I wasn't complaining about my day for I've learned a lesson still. And the lesson is, it's all about mind that matters. My friends told me that it was all my feeling. I am not really alone. I have friends, lots of them.

My Blog, My Life

Most of the bloggers I know have their own internet connection at home. They say that it is one of the requisites in order to be a certified blogger. Lucky for those who have their connection at home. They don't need to queue in internet cafes just to rent for a PC and enjoy blogging. My story is very different. Maybe I am one of those bloggers who still patient enough to go to cafes and do the hobby. I have to walk from home to this computer house just to write. It takes a vigorous passion just to be able to sustain this routine. Yes, at first I was motivated to do blogging for the reward that it can offer to me as a writer. But I learned to love it. I feel like I'll be sick if I miss one day posting in my blog. Though I don't have the equipment to sustain this intelligent hobby I consider, I still hopeful that I'll never be tired. I love blogging. Blogging is part of my life. Without it, I will be a man walking in one leg.

Being An Addict

What makes you addicted? Or are you addicted on doing or having something?

When people hear the word "addict" or "addicted", they always think of it as a negative situation. It is often associated with illegal drugs addiction or smoking inclination. But I believe, addiction comes in two forms, the positive one and the other side. For instance, I am addicted to "writing" or "blogging" and it doesn't bring any bad effects to me. So that's the good side of being addicted to something. But on the other hand, being addicted on something in which in a way brings a lot of bad effects into yourself is the negative side of addiction. This is now the time when the person needs addiction recovery. If you feel like being inclined into doing something in which you feel has done devastation to you, stop doing it. Love yourself, never indulge on something that'll bring you harm. Life is so short, so live your life to the fullest.

I'm Pissed

They say that I am too emotional. They say that I am too weak. They say that I am coward. They say that I am a loser. But I am not. I may be crying but I am not too over with it. I may be sad but I am not coward, I am not weak. I take all those comments with an open mind. Thinking that they'll be over it to. But I never expected that my patience with this matter has and end. Yes I am pissed. I am annoyed. I wanna cry out. But I don't want anybody to hear this my mourn. They just don't know how victorious I am. They just don't know how brave I am. If I just have a chance to tell the world that the true loser are those people who couldn't understand me, I'll grab it as if I'm yearning for it. Yes, I wanna fit in. Who doesn't wanna fit? But fitting in means pretending to like what you really don't. Fitting comes with going with the flow even if your current is the opposite with it. When this will end?

A Beautiful Night

 Tonight is the best night I've ever witnessed. I am so astonished with how the stars arranged itself. The sky is so clear with stars glittering. The moon is so eye-captivating. The temperature is not so cold yet not irritating. The night is a picture of peace and tranquility which is the best moment to reminisce all the best moments you have in your entire life. I know you'll envy me for having this chance to witness this beautiful night. I know that my word is not enough to express how wonderful this night is. But one thing could say, you'll see the true beauty of nature at night.

pic from http://coolcosmos.ipac.caltech.edu/cosmic_kids/AskKids/images/venus_sky.jpg