The Things We Do For Research

If you follow me on social media, you might have seen comments about me surviving scuba diving lessons or something to that degree. I use the word surviving for a lot of reasons, but I'll get back to that. 

I have now written two books in which scuba has played an important role, and I am about to dive headfirst (see what I did there?) into a third. So I figured it's about time I stopped researching how to do it and actually learned in person.

For the record, I might not have gathered the courage to do this if my husband hadn't signed us up for this class as my Christmas gift. We have been talking about getting certified for years, and have been putting it off for various reasons (read: excuses). And we both knew that it's time. I mean really. I'm writing about mermaids now! Come on. 

Just so you know, I am slightly claustrophobic, so wearing the scuba goggles freaks me out because they cut off my peripheral vision. And wearing the BCDs (see that? I'm using scuba terms and everything!) freaks me out because the vest has lots of gadgets attached, including a super heavy tank filled with air, and I am not that heavy, but I am also filled with air, so together my tank and I don't sink so well. Not being able to stay underwater when I'm supposed to freaks me out too. And then there's the whole thing of it being unnatural for humans to be able to breathe underwater. (Like, really, are you kidding me? I'm not Emma.)

Yesterday was our first "open water" dive. (Not necessarily open, because it was in a crater, which is not all that huge, but it's like 90 feet deep.) So there are all these reasons why I sat on the edge of the platform trying not to have a panic attack. But I pushed through it, and I put on my goggles, and the ridiculously long fins that make me feel like a fish, and I stuck the regulator in my mouth and I jumped in.  

Guys, I didn't die! 

And after we figured out that I need a whole lot of weight added to my vest, I managed to sink below the surface and I kept breathing. And I swam around a bit. I practiced losing my regulator and getting water in my goggles and managed to get it out without rising to the surface. I ended up diving to 40 feet below the surface.

And it was fun. 

I'm not going to lie. It was expensive, and difficult, and ridiculously scary at first, but I pushed past all that and I am so proud of myself for being brave. Later this week, I'm going to do it again. And then I'll have a shiny pretty card with my picture on it, and it will tell the world that I know how to use all that equipment to breathe underwater. And then I will know how my characters feel as I write this next book.    

This is the kind of thing writers sometimes do to bring stories to life. But more than that, this is the kind of thing people do to overcome our fears. 

Okay, now it's your turn. What hard thing / scary fear are you facing right now? How are you facing it?

Totally Random Thoughts (October 2013 Edition)

Fear happens when we have something to lose. So how brave would we be if we believed—even for just one day—that we would win?

Trust is a gift of faith that is, more often than not, destroyed by imagination and insecurity, rather than reality.

A hero is someone who you know will always show up for you, even when they can’t necessarily save you or your world.

The most popular TV shows, movies, and books elicit strong emotions from people watching/reading. It is those strong emotions, along with strong questions, that keep us those characters in our heads, feeding our need to continue returning to watch the next episode, sequel, or volume. Or, barring that, it feeds our desire to continue watching or reading things by those same creators.

Sometimes a walk on the beach or a drive to nowhere is the best way to see the best parts of the world.

Any thoughts you’d like to add?

Fear of the Unknown

I think it’s safe to say we all have fears. Lots of them. (Not that some of us would admit to them, but they exist.) But have you ever made a major life decision based on fear? Or maybe you went with courage instead?

Seriously. Life is scary. Success is scary. Failure is scary. Commitment is scary.

Some people fear staying in one place long enough to matter, while others fear leaving that place in order to spread their wings, make more of themselves or their lives.

Playing sports, or letting our kids play them = scary. Skydiving, scuba, traveling to new countries, learning to drive, riding on a motorcycle, skiing, anything you’ve never done before. Starting a new project, changing careers, anything that signals the beginning of a new phase of life can be REALLY FREAKING SCARY.

Because once we do those things, there will be some kind of result. Good or bad. And sometimes, when we do something big, the results can be ridiculously terrifying.

But if we don’t take those chances, do those things, how boring would our lives be? And more importantly, how would we ever discover the most amazing parts of life?

Sometimes we all have to take the scary road.

Submit that novel. Query that agent. Apply for that job. Move to a new city. Ask out that guy/girl you like. Plan that party. Go somewhere foreign.

DO SOMETHING BIG.

This weekend, I challenge you go do something you’ve been putting off because of fear. And when you do, I want to hear about it.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Go! Go now!

Good luck.

Dauntless

You know what I’ve discovered in all my thoughts about success and failure? Both require a large amount of bravery. Serious bravery. Because in order to succeed, you have to be willing to also fail. In order to fail, you have to be trying to succeed. (Unless you get into something deliberately planning to fail, but seriously, who does that?)

Whichever way you look at it, the only difference between the two is the end result and how we react to it.

Every success story is told with an interesting sequence of failure-type events which drove the story forward. They’re probably the most thought provoking, interesting stories you’ll ever hear, because they tell about how one person set out to succeed and FAILED, then failed again, and then a few more times, before finally reaching a level of success. And then they probably failed a few more times before making it to the top. If they ever made it to the top. Maybe they made it to a completely different location and decided that was where they should have been going all along. You never know. The point is they made it somewhere great. Somewhere AMAZING.

That’s how success goes. It’s how every game is won. It’s how every plot is driven. It’s what keeps us pushing on and shooting forward with a mad desire to get to the other side.

I am not afraid to fail. (Say it with me.) I AM NOT AFRAID TO FAIL.

But I’ll tell you what I am afraid of. I am terrified of never reaching my arms out and trying to pull myself higher. Because that is when I’ll realize how many times I’ve fallen down. No one wants to have to face that.

I am not afraid. I am NOT AFRAID. I AM NOT AFRAID! I. Am. Dauntless.

The question is, are you?

What Becomes of the Broken Hearted?

On Monday, I promised to tell you what kids need to know after a trusted adult breaks their heart and/or spirit.So here it is, the raw truth (for all kids and adults alike):

It does not matter what church you attend, or how often you go. It does not matter what sport you play, your position, your skill level, your choice of uniform colors. It doesn’t even matter if you play a sport at all. Or if you do art, or dance, or music, or writing. It doesn’t matter if your hair is blonde or brown or black or purple or RAINBOW striped, any more than the color of your skin matters. It doesn’t matter where you live, how large your house, the kind of car your parents drive or if you walk everywhere.  

None of these things have anything to do with your value as a very important human being.

You have a purpose, and it is not to be what everyone else in the world thinks you should be, but rather to be YOU. The best you possible. There is always room for improvement. Because no one is, or will ever be perfect. But YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.

That person who let you down? Obviously, they’re not perfect either. And it’s not up to you to make them see the error of their ways (though, your parents might if ever given the chance). No. Your job is to NEVER listen to the voice they’ve installed in your head that makes you look at the ground instead of straight ahead, that makes you back away from a challenge instead of meeting it head on, that makes you feel the need to apologize for NOTHING.

You are good enough. You have the potential to climb mountains, swim oceans, jump chasms, and visit outer space if that’s what you want to do. What you do with your life is not up to them. It’s up to you. And you have the ability to do it, if only you will conquer your fears and try.

And you know what? You may not be perfect, but your hopes, your dreams? They are. And you have every right, every ability, to reach for them.

Never, ever let anyone—no matter who they are—tell you, or make you feel otherwise.

Okay kids, thanks for listening. I’ll jump off my soap box now. Good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.

*Yep, still working toward what all this has to do with writing. Friday, peeps. Friday. 

The Defining Factor

I’ve been thinking this week about fear, and passion, and battles worth fighting. In real life, everyone has struggles. All of us. That’s kind of what life’s about. But it isn’t necessarily our trials in life that define us. Is it?

Trials may shape us, but passion can, and often does, define us. A passionate person will fight for something they want, something they believe in. I dare say that passion has been a big factor in war and revolution in our world. If the American people didn’t feel passionate about their freedom, the revolutionary war would never have been fought, and especially not won. We were then, and remain still, a passionate country. Why else would elections become so heated? Debates so nasty?

It’s all due to passion.

Granted, that doesn’t mean people don’t often take things too far. That’s a given. Still, passion is an important thing to feel, to own, to have. Unfortunately, along with passion, we also have fears. Fear of reprisal, retribution, consequence. What will happen if we follow our passion? What will happen if we speak our minds? If we rock the boat? If we change the norm? What if we follow our dreams?

Fear can bind passion more tightly than steel, paralyzing us, removing us, restraining us. But there comes a time when some battles need to be fought. The trick is figuring out which battles are worth fighting, and which ones are best to let die.

Do we fight the revolutionary war or run and hide from the redcoats? Do we speak up about injustice or wait for someone else to do it for us? When someone pushes us in the wrong direction do we step away or push back? Unfortunately, the answer isn’t always cut and dry, isn’t always easy.

I believe that our passions decide our life path and make us into stronger people. It makes us who we are, or even better, who we want to be.

Forgive me, I’m about to forge into literary territory again. Can’t help it. It’s what I do. I’m going to use The Hunger Games as an example. **Spoiler alert** We have three characters.

1. Katniss, the main character. From the very beginning, we know what she feels passionate about: Her family, and more specifically, her little sister. We know this because right off the bat, she’s hunting, working hard to feed her sister and mother so they don’t starve.

2. Then we have Gale, a secondary character. Throughout the book (as well as the sequel, Catching Fire) we see him expressing anger toward the Capital, the laws, the disgust at the conditions under which his society, his family, is forced to live. Gale feels passionate about change. And he recognizes that in order to bring about that change, eventually, there will have to be a revolution.

3. Character number three is Peeta. At first, I wasn’t sure what Peeta felt passionate about. It took a little more thinking on my part before I saw the obvious. Peeta may want revolution, or he may not. He likes art, and baking, and he’s strong. But none of those things are his passion. The one thing he wants most in life is for Katniss to survive. She is his passion. (Le sigh.)

If you look closely, you’ll notice how the motivations and actions of each character are driven by passion. Personality, disposition, and reaction all play a part, but passion is definitely the driving force behind everything, behind all of them. And it’s what makes this such a compelling, great story. The goal may change in each book, but the driving passion remains the same.

So, yes, passion is definitely important in writing. Not to mention that an author will never succeed unless he/she feels passionate about what they are writing, or about writing itself. But even more than writing, passion is a huge important part of life. No matter what your goals, passion is the driving force that will ensure you succeed. Without it, the goal becomes an empty shell. There is nothing to win, lose, or gain.

What are you passionate about? And how does fear paralyze you? Is your battle (internal or external) worth fighting? Why? Really, I want to know. And no, I’m not just talking about writing for a change. I’m talking about life in general. Let’s have a sharing moment.

Discuss!

**UPDATE: In my contest post the other day, I originally forgot to mention Karen Hoover, who's book, The Sapphire Flute, is also being released next week. She's hosting an ongoing contest on her blog in which she draws a winner every Saturday this month. Check it out here. Sorry, Karen. Bad, bad me.