Trust Me. . .
Monday, February 16, 2009, 12:31 AM
Got this mms early in the morning from dalilah sweets and brighten up my day completely.. Hahaha!! Yes!! Jason Mraz tickets are here!! Yay!! Hahaha!! I'm like shouting like crazy la!! Haha.. Ok over-exaggerating. No i didn't show but it somehow put a smile on my face when i got her mms. My 2nd concert that i'm going ever since Black Eyed Peas in singapore havin their 1st concert like 2005 i think.. Haha.. can't wait for the date.. Coldplay's coming on 23rd march!! I want!!
I was reading Naha's blog and somehow it gave me a smirk on my face that reminds me wad she told me earlier. Haha.. Ape nak buat, nasib baik bukan PI. Haha.. Kalau dia PI, abis la kau.. Haha.. Personal joke so can't translate.
Anyways, juz got back to work earlier juz now in the afternoon after a looooong week of hiatus, well not really looong, was only about 3 days. And yes, i really have to say this no matter whoever reading this entry, RETAIL SUCKS!! Haha.. yes.. I'm not allowed to typed out the next sentence i'm about to type cuz it's quite sensitive but when it comes to serving i hate, and i really hate to serve this people that starts with a P and end with an O. Why is it so difficult for people to reply with a smile whenever we greet them? Seriously, it's really disturbing, act like some DIVAS or wadever, ugh, seriously disgust me.
Oh ya! I have a klutzy story to tell u guys, to make u guys enlightened by my misery, most of u all know how clumsy and silly i am in doing things, i did something quite stupid yesterday. Yesterday as u all know is Valentine's day, and i can't go out because of certain reason which i shall not mention, i decided to do my Spring Cleaning in my room. Yeah, i know, me? spring cleaning? Seriously?
Haha.. yes yes, i know, i cannot stand the mess in my room so spring cleaning here and there, i calculated there was like about 5 or 7 thrash bags in my room to be thrown out after that cleaning, coins were scattered everywhere, 5 cents ,10 cents were like everywhere, so picked them up and put it in my wallet, ok few minutes later, i took out the freakin thrash and throw in the dumpster. I cleared a few thrash and continued my spring cleaning, so i happen to have found more coins lying around, so i picked it up again, and i wanted to put in my wallet, then, i found out that my wallet was gone, i thrashed my clean room juz for to find that fat wallet of mine, but nowhere to be found. I panic, i sweat and it was driving me crazy la!! Hahaha!!
So the idea struck in my head that i need to check in the dumpster, so i check, with my bare hands rummaging thru the dirty filthy thrash, and i found the plastic that i tied with all my rubbish and found my wallet inside. DOTZ!!! WTF Rite?? Sigh. i was laughin to myself and cursing myself of course... LOL.. haha..
mrklutz signing out.
Saturday, February 14, 2009, 12:40 PM
Hey ya every1!! So sorry for the super loooong hiatus from blogging, been preoccupied lately with work, so kinda super busy. How's every1? I'm sure everyone is ok, oh yeah, to everyone out there, HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! Hey, even if u're single, don't be sad, cuz u can spent your valentine with your close frens too, single ones that is.
Updates!! Project Valentine was super success, i was flabbergasterred by the launch, seriously, till now, i'm juz super speechless with wad Md Nor and Dan had did for us. Their talents and creativity left us speechless and totally mesmerized. The launch comes with an album with 2 double disc inside. Exclusively for the 16 chosen ones, not selling at HMV!! HAHAHA!! That's why it's exclusive!! Hahahaha.. 1st disc is all of the 16 love songs that each individual chose, very interesting and yet surprising. Hahaha.. The other disc is our shots, our shortlisted shots among the hundred frames that dan took.. Hahaha.. Nice la, not bad, Kudos to Dan's photography, he'll make a fine photographer.
Next, as most of u all know, that my workplace, Mooks is closing down, in 3 months time i think. Well, of course i'm sad if u asked, miss the peers that i work with, the Everlast neighbours that we drive each other crazy, dancing inside the store with the upbeat songs when there's nothing to do and no1's around, being too vulgar to Kyler most of the time when working with her, having my distress-ing moments by people-watch at all the cute looking people outside (u know wad i mean.. haha..) and yes, exchanging jokes with my boys and our ta-hui night.. Hmm, when was the last time yea? Yes, i really those moments, even they're gonna go back NUM soon, i'm gonna miss them dearly.
Ok, now i dunno whether should i or should i not continue Dragonboat due to recent events. Cuz i lose my freaking $200 Adidas shoe that i like dearly. Stupid me for misplacing it, so it's partly, i fucked up. ARGH!!!!! Now i can't even freakin gym or run. I can only workout at home.. So now, i'm waiting for my pay to buy that same pair again. I really want it badly!!
Ok, i miss my 3 angels, even tho i'm not close to Ana, but gonna be soon though, i miss the 3 girls, super funny la, Diki and Hadi as well, nice chaps. Caught up with Naha, well things are stable with her i suppose, i'm glad she's slowing letting go and moving things on slowly, i'm happy for her.. Miss dalilah as well, can't wait to meet for the next meet, Jason Mraz concert!! YAY!!! haha!! Can't wait for that..
Went to Sally's birthday that day, which i don't practically know who she is but i bumped onto Sheera!! did i spell her name rite? haha, yana's fren, haha.. I barely recognised her becuz she was wearing glasses and untied her hair. Surprised she remembered me. I guess i'm old already. haha..
oh yeah! I'm starting a website soon, for my work, i mean my writting, when i'm ready, i'll let u guys know.. haha.. juz watch out for it yeah!! haha..
Anyways, till next time, and i promise, i'll update regularly. .
mrklutz. signing out..
Sunday, January 04, 2009, 9:46 PM
Hey there readers!! A very Happy 2009 to all of you! Haha.. The pictures below were taken for the past few days since the 1st January. Haha.. It was a fun start for the new year for me, spending time with my RandomZ: Yana, Draz and Danger Dan of course.. Hahaha.. As u can see from all the pics, we've been enjoying ourselves so far, with Project Valentine coming, and Staircase Story, we all are looking forward to it. And of course taken by the professionals, like Danger Dan and Md nor, the camera just can't stop clicking aye? hahaha...
I love this shot, really cool huh? Well, I look like HUNK TUAH(HANG TUAH ACTUALLY.).. Well Danny always love playing the villain, it looks as if it was taken from a movie preview.. Hahaha.. But anywhos, love the shot!
Went Karaoke with the RandomZ on New Year's day, well apparently Yana was so sick, she's like a freakin walkin zombie!! Haha.. Miss ya guys a lot!
Who's that girl over there? hmm, that's Bee! Nice gal and she's a comic freak too!! She loves Jonathan Rhys Meyers like I do!! Hahaha.. the reason why we can get along so well is we're both Taureans!! Hahaha!! like 3 days apart i think.. haha.. She's really cool gal, wanna hang out more with her again.
And of course the Dynamic DuO, Danny and me, danny acting cute as always, and me, looking shag like hell.. haha.. Well, gonna do my Project Valentine Photoshoot soon though, damm, hopefully it'll be good, since danny's taking it.. Haha.. Oh well.. I love the start of my 2009, well apart from the workload from Work.. Hahaha..
mrklutz apologise for being too rude for his last entry..
Wednesday, December 31, 2008, 2:59 AM
NOTE: DUE TO THE FOLLOWING ENTRY, ANOTHER SUPERVISION MATURED READER SITTING NEXT TO YOU IS ADVISED.
To whom it may Fucking Concern,
this is wad u fucking sms me:
I guess u wudn't xpect to noe bout d recording tht u accidentally recorded while talking to me last few months uh? Apparently u recorded it out of goodwill. to mend things with me n rusty.
Well well, aren't u doing d opp darling? to think i actualli asked u wad d beepin sound was n u acted blur bout it. such a gd actor aren't u. oh i forgot u do acts sometymes.good acting skills u got dere, helmi of all person dear, i din xpect it to be u.im not mad, jus disappointed.
n jus wonder, hw cud sumone who actualli calls u up n ask how ure doing but little did the person knw, he has done sumting WICKED, i mus say.. oh well, it's done. it's a good thing tho tht rusty heard it. no lies from me to her. juz tht i cudnt relli remember wad i said cuz i was in an angry mood. u now hw wen pple is angry n deyy say d stupidiest thing n pple take it seriusli?
haha. n on a note, actualli rusty do wanna b fwen with me again. BUT tht was b4 d recording which i din knew about at all. too bad uh for me? congrats on ya "achievement of tryin to mend us back".. u kinda "succeeded" woohoo!! happy new year helmi.
nice noein u. :)
nice noein u. :)
i received ur fucking redundant sms at 130am, and now at 0309hrs, i'm bursting my every vein of anger in this fucking dirty entry. U mess with the wrong guy bitch!! I'm fucking sick and tired of being nice now.
Let me tell u somethin, i have no intentions, none wadsoever to keep the fuck from seperating you 2. u both hav been best frens and i hate to see the crumbling friendship fall juz over one fucking stupid issue.
Yes i hav every fucking rite to be fucking angry. Cuz why? everything i did, u see in a different light, u deliberately put the fucking blame on me whereas i am tryin to put a stop and tried to make peace to the both of u.
And i am done trying, this is not the fucking first time it happened to me. It happen to me and Naha that it cost me her friendship over a breakup. Now, it's the both of u.
Juz to be clear, wad the fuck is that acting thing suppose TO fucking mean?? Danny saw how I AM FUCKING TRYING to get u guys back together, and u think it was all an act?? YES, is my damm mistake to record u maybe i wud get somethin good out of the recording that u say something fucking nice and sincere to get back with ur best fren. AND I DID ANOTHER BIG FUCKING MISTAKE, that i got involved that is none of my FUCKING personal BUSINESS!!
You juz hit MY FUCKING nerve now and i WOULD NEVER EVER FUCKING BE ABLE TO FORGIVE U AFTER THE FUCKING MEAN WORDS U HAVE SAID.
Juz to be fucking Clear, i hav never looked at u at a different way neither to RUSTY'S cuz u both are my frens. i never judged the both u, i was FUCKING neutral. and it was the BIGGEST STUPID FUCKING MISTAKE that i made trying to fix this debacle between the both of u.
Rusty, if u are reading this, u can get mad at me all u want, but i am DONE here, innocently being thrown by accusations from a SADISTIC BITCH LIKE HER.
I'm DONE BEING FUCKING NICE.
AMILIA, if u happen to be reading this, FUCK YOU!! IF u want ur boyfren to beat me up, by all means! i am done. U misjudged my intentions, my morale and my dignity. I may be Gay, but i still have a brain that i can think like a man. I'm not stupid, but wadever u juz said to me, it was hurtful and insightful. the recording can be hurtful to u, but wad u did to me, it's twice as wad i did to you. and ur sarcasm, is so fucking unrealistic, can't u do better than tht?
Btw, It's Hilmi not FUCKING HELMI!!!
IF u know wad's best for the both u, stop this childish act, grow up and do something about it. forgive and forget!!!
I need to lay low and i wanna stop fixing other's people fucking mess from now on. cuz it never will be fixed and i'm the one being blame for everything.
mrklutz has cracked. . . . and i hav the right to be angry..
Wednesday, December 24, 2008, 1:44 AM
Hey ya everybody!! So sorry been away for like friggin long.. Gomenasai!! Hahaha.. Here are my recent updates for the past 3 weeks.. haha..
~ I juz got dumped like 3 weeks ago.
~ Haven't been sleepin enuf due to work.
~ Attended Draz's Corrupted Princess 21st birthday.
~Izzam has been a neighbour who stays opposite my block and we're hang out buddies now!
~Life juz got more sucky than ever on saturdays since drama productions are over.
~Work stress from all the nonsense going on in store.
~Work stress from all the nonsense going on in store.
~Surprised visits from an entourage of drama production people/old colleagues/regular people/ best frens.
~went tanning, like finally!
~Stopped going gym due to the workload i have.
~Owed danny a belated birthday gift.. Haha!!
Ok yesterday Danger Dan treated to watch Twilight, oh my god, i was like, wow this and wow that, and i can't get my eyes off 1 family member from the Cullen, haha, Carlisle Cullen, the father figure in the Cullen family. When i look at him i was like mesmerised.. haha.. Really, i was like fascinated.. haha., With that dreamy eyes.. Omg, *orgasmic rush*! Haha.. Now i know why every1 is so crazy reading the book, as we were sitting having our dinner at Pastamania, Dan somehow book-reviewed to me. I was like taken aback from wad my ears are hearing, i never though Danny is the kinda who reads. Hahaha..
So when i get my pay, i'm gonna read the Stephanie Meyer's Collections. Haha.. I hate to admit this but i'm addicted rite now.. haha.. Gonna buy the whole set. It's good for me though, cuz i haven't been catchin up on reading for a very long time.
Guess wad?? Mr mraz is coming to singapore again!!! Yay!! And I'm not gonna missed it this time round. I missed him for Singfest but not this time!! Going with my sweet Dalilah, haha, any1 wanna tag along? Concert is in March.. Jason Mraz, here i come!! hehe..
Work has been stress lately for me cuz been preparing for the new collection, and i'm like making space for the new stocks, my storeroom is f-ing messy la, omg, driving me crazy. Hmm.. Sales has been improving, not too bad lately, since it's like the season of giving, and of course Mooks is like having this ongoing giving of 1 for 1 sales inside the store which is like crazy juz now, but for wad it's worth, I'm glad that the stocks are moving, if not i feel like i'm having a garage sale or like i'm selling my house. Haha..
Here are the retarded pics:
xoxo mrklutz wishin every1 a Happy 2009!
Wednesday, December 03, 2008, 8:51 AM
Morning fellow readers, after a long weeks hiatus from gym and exercise, i went for a run today, early in the morning, well not early but somewhere 8am i suppose, yeah i know u guys might be asking why, despite the stress at work i am facing.
Well, it's because i think i'm losing my shape that i used to have, and i have to keep reminding myself that i gotta discipline myself back again, like during my NS days, i remembered that i always went to gym almost like 4 times a week with Herms, and now he has no longer a member in the gym, now, i'm gymming alone.
It's been quite a while i have not been running outside instead of a treadmill, so i felt the rush while i was jogging, as if i'm taking my IPPT, haha.. I still remembered that the last time i took mine which was early June this year my timing is still 9.16, but now, hmm, i don't think i can achieve that. Haha.. Gotta discipline..
Anyways, something has been up lately with me, i had trouble sleeping, i don't even know wad's bothering me, is it the Play this coming Saturday, that i kept forgettin my lines or is it work? Every1 at work is having a stressful time, especially the full-timers, and the management of course, i can see from their faces. It's because of the festive season i guess that every1 is feeling the pressure with the recession still going on in Singapore. Wow.. I wonder how long will this last. Hopefully, it'll get better soon.
Brothers and Sisters season 3 is finally here!! Yeah!! Jeremy helped me download it, and i've yet to watch it. I love this show cuz it shows the chaos of the Walker family, very interesting, but u've got to watch it from season 1 then u'll understand why i love this show so much, moving and gratifying of course, not to mentioned the mishaps and misfalls in the family. U won't regret watching.
Oh yeah, when i'm stress and feeling super down, i watch my FRIENDS dvd. It never fails to cheer u up. seriously, even though i can't sleep, it'll helps u relax and take ur mind off things for little while.
Psst.. Happy World AIDS Day every1!!
xoxo mrklutz signing out..
Sunday, November 30, 2008, 12:23 AM
Saturday is juz another Sad-urdays
Hmm.. Usually i'm quite a quick observer when it comes to people, but when it comes to me, I'm a bit S-L-O-W. Seriously, i juz realise that after my drama rehearsals on Saturdays, I immdeiately went home after that. I mean seriously, I stopped going out with my frens, prior to them being busy dealing with ur stuffs, yeah, and it's like my only off day on Saturdays. The clubbin interest is there but, it's slowly killing me. I mean dealing with the PLU issues and all that, Ugh, sometimes i find people are a bit bias, well, that's life if u called it. It's never been fair.
Pardon my negativity, but usually when i have time for myself, i like to think, for myself, thinkin about the future, thinking about wad's gonna happen to myself and wonder am i going through the right path. Like Hafi told me the other time at work he say something like 'I like working alone, it gives time for yourself to think, what u want for urself in life, and it's like reflection period.' I couldn't agree with the 17 year old optimistic guy. Before i was typing my entry for this post, i rummage through my past blog www.backyardjunkie.blogspot.com, going throught the entries of my past, as i was at it, it tickled me with the entries i had, especially the ones is 2006, before my time to serve the nation. I was telling myself 'wow, is that what i wrote?' Yup, i guess i had quite a few issues back then, was so naive, stupidly fallen in "love" which i don't even know what that means. Not even now.
Like Jason Mraz says: "it takes no time to fall in love but it takes you years to know what love is and it takes some fears to make you trust it takes those tears to make it rust it takes the dust to have it polished"
And during that point of my old blog i realised it's beem flooded with my sappy emo poems, well not professionally written like the O level students or writers like Alfian Saat or Boo Junfeng, but it's juz a localised and easier to understand i suppose. Though my dream is to be a Playwright of course, but the journey is still long and undecided.
With the song 'Disappear' by Beyonce Knowles that's been taking off from her new album 'I Am.. Sasha Fierce.' I felt that I'm hooked to it that i could relate to the lyrics. Somehow actually. Anyways, talk about Beyonce, her 3rd album is not too bad, i was expecting more jumpy and dance, but less dance in this 1 but more ballads, but still, i really like it.
Something happened to me 3 days ago, it was quite disturbing tho, yet surprising, i find. I got a call, from my sister, asking me how am i doing and all that, she was talking to me on the phone and my reply was a bit cold, not that i couldn't care less but was questioning my ego, 'Why?' I can't really elaborate more as it's complicated as it looks already, I'm wiring up myself with work and hoping to get a part time job soon at some 24 hour cafe maybe? like Gloria Jeans? the one in front of Cine? hmm. i wanna check it out soon whether they take night shift ppl. No matter what, i got to tell myself i need to be strong, always tell myself 'it's for the rent.'
As it was past that he was living in torment,
he paused for awhile as if his heart stopped beating at that moment,
He resides in the dark where fear conquers the mind,
Unsure of himself where he had deliberately crossed that line,
Entangled in despair, angsty and hatred,
Can't managed to find his own cup of comfort.
A mask of uncertainty lies on his face,
Yearning for love or dying to be saved?
Something abstract I wrote i guess, like i art i suppose, maybe suggestions or comments from the panel? yes, u readers are my panel, been a while i haven't wrote anythin, pardon my grammar though.. Working tomorrow again, and next week's my show and no1 have yet to tell me whether they're going or not.. hmm.. seems like there's no1 coming though, oh well..
xoxo mrklutz sleeping off..