Serious mode

I am extremely sleepy. I am fighting the urge to just take out my cushion and blanket and curl on my carpet and have a snooze. There's hardly anyone around. The PA's on leave, my next door colleague is busy attending her clients and my little boss has been lured to Ike@ by her husband. Lest you think that we here makan gaji buta saja, rest assured (especially you MG), when we work, we really work hard. Try juggling between seeing clients, lecturing and supervising the trainees, doing research (supposedly. Bab ni i lemah sikit) and doing admin work. If we here do not have the freedom to sekali sekala disappear or indulge ourselves in sesi tenggiling, i would have gone crazy a long time ago. This job which allows this flexibility (unofficially. Don't let the biggest boss know about this) is what made me decided a long time ago that i would not have it any other way. If i do indulge myself in sesi tenggiling, i may risk being left all alone here until night time kalau tak terdengar alarm berbunyi and with no one to kejutkan i.

Just a moment ago i surfed the Air@sia website...tengok2 for any good bargains etc. Planning for holidays excites me. Out of 10, mungkin satu je yg menjadi. You see, i married a man who is into military precision. There is no such thing as grabbing the RM15.99 ticket to KB at the click of the button. By the time MG tengok schedule kalau boleh ambik cuti, check internet 10kali for the best hotel, things to do etc., that best deal yg RM15.99 most probably dah jadi RM159.99! Humph! That's what happened to the KB RM400 for 3 adults and 2 kids airfare deal. MG couldn't decide dan dan tu jugak if he can/wants to come along, therefore at the click of the mouse i'm going with a friend and he's looking after the kids, haha.

One factor that contributed to my sleepiness today was because of this information i had from a colleague. According to this little birdie, 1 senior colleague of ours has commented that i am not serious at work (or rather at workplace B) so unlike the Baung. He also said that he's going to have a word with me. My bubble was burst. It's true, i'm not a serious person. I have to keep myself amused or else i'd go crazy. Nak je cakap kat si Mamat tu, well hello, for your info, Baung complaints all the time about having to go to workplace B. (FYI, just because i was back at work last week, he excused himself from the thurs afternoon session at workplace B). He grumbles all the time about not having enough support dlm segala bentuk etc. and wants me to threaten the establishment that kalau tak dapat support by so and so we'll withdraw our services. Haiyoh! Still this is not about the Baung...this is about me, the class joker...itu la, kalau banyak gelak either you tembam (terlebih angin) atau people question your credibility at work. I guess, instead of gelak cam pontianak yg confuse, i should start grubling, just to appear serious. That kept me awake last night.

So this morning i came in and announced to the little boss, from now onwards since i dah kena tegur, i'll be in a serious mode. So, if i shut my office door, keeping quiet, i may not necessary be doing anything wothwhile, but you bet i'll be serious about it! If that guy does come to me to have 'a quiet word' with me, i will resist the temptation to kick his balls (how dare he!) and just say, i have lost the zest for teaching or operating, in fact of doing any work at all. All i want to do is to go home and tido or watch Astr0. But since, i have my hutang keliling pinggang, i just have to carry my big arse to work every morning, still.

(The little boss and next-door colleague said, what?? You're going to be in a serious mode??? So boring lah!! Well, at least i know i'm loved by some people, me the class joker)

Lelaki, laki dan dot dot dot

My desperate hoswipe cousin no.1 called me last week utk mengadu tentang anak and laki dia. Her youngest child is sitting for SPM this year. Kisahnya budak ni suka nak berglamer...for a start i don't actually blame her because maknya i.e my cousin yg galakkan..but takkan nak kata 'i told you so' because i pun tak pernah bagi tau kat my cousin 'elo, what are you doing?' kan..criticise the way people bring up their children tengok2 anak awak yg tak jadi nanti.

This girl walaupun dah dekat nak SPM, masih bersibuk2an dlm some fan club of reality tv star. Pi trip and lepak2 sana sini dgn the other f c members. Mak pak budak ni bangga anaknya boleh bergaul dgn people yg way lebih tua dari dia..kononnya dia pandai menyesuaikan dirilah..galakkan sangat sampai mak sanggup jadi drebar ke sana sini, beli or tempah baju glamer utk anak pi photo shoot dgn artis tu...but they forgot that these people dah takde nak sit for any exams! So budak ni sekarang memberontak bila mak kenakan curfew dah tak boleh nak ikut the fc activities until lepas SPM. I setakat dengar je lah kan..takkan nak kata nak melentur buluh biar dari rebung or nasik dah jadi bubur ke....seriously, in school, i was a nerd. Dgn specs plastik besar macam goldfish (seriously la kan, jaman2 tu apsal la our parents made us wear those kind of Miss Courtney (mind your language) specs?). I suka lepak kat rumah, kalau tak baca buku, i baca buku cerita...sebab tu la i socially inept sampai sekarang agaknya.

Anak tak happy pi komplen kat paknya. And paknya pulak kalau between anak and isteri will side the anak. Walaupun isteri dilimpahi wang ringgit emas permata pelbagai, sakit gak hati bini kalau sampai ada anak yg dah tua bangka dah kerja and tinggal rumah asing pun pak suruh maknya yg ironkan baju bebudak ni...and do their laundry for them. And this is just the tip of the iceberg...kalau mak tegur anak, pak akan tanya why mak nak keriau2 kat anak..obviously my role was just to listen...kalau ikutkan hati nak je kata ces, jantan jenis membesarkan dot dot dot je..but kalau berbuih mulut you kata something pun tu tetap laki dia kan...

I told MG that kalau la laki i jenis cam tu, mau i karate je. Doesn't matter la bawak balik emas permata..my self pride is just too big.

Kejap ada kejap takde

I was off work again last Friday, baby X pulak kena chicken pox. Sekarang ni cycle dah complete kat rumah so hopefully no more pox-day-off anymore. Lainlah kalau boleh jangkit kat cats kan...speaking of cats, Melly has been extremely naughty! She keeps on peeing atas cushion, newspaper, rug tak usah cakaplah...at first i kesian because of her incontinence dia mungkin tak sempat ke litter boxnya..but now ni i rasa dia saja testing kat mana2 nak melepas. My nose is always blocked, i can't detect pee smell even if she were to pee on me. So now MG has appointed himself as the PSI hehe..pee scene investigator. I prided myself that the house doesn't smell of cats as testified by my friends, but now i'm not so sure anymore....obviously we have given in quite a lot to the cats: 2,3 bijik kerusi rosak diaorg cakar, baju lekat bulu diaorg, curtain berlubang2, poket rabak (beli food and litter, bawak klinik, beli toys etc. and not mentioning ambik maid primarily for the reason that we need someone to vacuum the house everyday once the kids arrive) but a house that smells of pee? I don't think so!

Still trying to finish off the dry, boring lecture...but my concentration span is at the most 30 mins. Lepas tu mulalah gatal nak buat benda lain yg lebih memberangsangkan (OK Esah, i don't go that far) such as blog hopping etc. When i was an undergrad, there was this lecturer yg bagi lectures on Embryology. Bukan saja topik sungguh membosankan, she also tend to mumble to herself. But it was an important subject, we got examined on it. But being me, i still attended the lecture because attendance was compulsory, kalau tak tak dapat dok exam. But i would always write letter during that time. Lagipun masa tu mana ada email2 kan. There was this kiasu guy name Geoffrey..once i was sitting behind him in the lecture hall and dia pandang belakang 2,3 kali kat i. Habis je lecture dia mintak nak pinjam 'notes' i..nah hambik 'surat chenta' ku Geoffrey!

Masa i student, i baca buku depan tv sambil meniarap. A lot of the times, buku and tv akan tengok i because nescaya i akan tertido. I am not a genius but i think god has been kind to me, i would like to think.

My little boss called me to her office this morning and nak membagi tugasan...she said i'll try to make it quick because i can see that your eyes are starting to get glassy...Ada sekali tu ada lah minah hyper kat sini panggil meeting..for a start i was against that meeting pasal well, she wasn't in charge of that project pun tapi set2 yg gila kuasa terus take over. It went on and on and i was damn sleepy...so i excused myself konon2 cam nak pi toilet and sebenarnya i tido kat office..hehehe...

Random ramblings

I have been trying to prepare this lecture since last week. It is such a dry subject! When giving lectures, i like to make them interesting by diselang seli kan dgn own experince etc. This would perk the trainees up. Everybody likes a good story, esp. kalau yg ada berbau2 gossip tu. But this lecture i'm working on, no way can i selit2kan cerita. Unless i put in a slide yg takde kena mengena dgn topic...When i'm giving a lecture of a very dry subject, when i see people yawning, far from being offended, i feel like i have offended them and sometimes i do apologise (door mat!)

Anyway, i'm leaving the office in 10 mins. Am meeting up with the desperate hoswipe cousins of mine for some R&R. Dah lama tak jumpa diaorg, since i delivered baby X. I do feel guilty because whenever i go to meet them, i mesti sampai rumah between 7-730pm. I mean Baby X or Little D are not going to be permanently scarred just because i take a few hours off to have some fun, kan? But i guess it's just normal for a mother to feel so.

A staff commented that i have lost some weight and i felt slightly embarrassed. If that person only knew how much i eat..esp. at breakfast time. Dgn selection of kuih yg dekat 2 dozen, it's hard to limit oneself to just sekeping dua. Anyway, i fikir, ni tak boleh jadi ni..kalau masa breakfast pun dah mentekedarah, maunya by the end of the month i akan membelon. So, in the morning i avoid the canteen totally or kirim kat staff je. Obviouslylah disebabkan malu i would only ask for satu karipap and satu apam..idak le satu karipap sardin, satu karipap ayam, pau kacang, apam, cekodok 4 etc. etc. I am a fat person trapped in a er..medium build body..no matter how much weight i might have lost, i'd still feel conscious people watching me eat.

For e.g. kalau kat kenduri kahwin, if i nak tambah lagi (yg selalunya pun kalau hari tu ada kenduri kahwin, MG and i would be starving because satu hari tak makan apa2, tunggu nak pi kenduri je), i would definitely send MG to the buffet table to get it for me. segan nak pi ambil sendiri because terasa2 org kata, wah! no wonderlah tembam! If i were to go to hotel buffet pulak, kalau boleh i'd make sure that i get a table yg dekat2 dgn buffet bar supaya bila nak ulang alik tu tak payah lalu celah2 orang ramai. Once when i was an undergrad, bila naik bas kenkadang tu kat belakang tiket tu ada coupon, buy 1 free 1 pizza from Pizza hut. i remembere that once, my friend and i ordered 1 large pizza, obviously got another large one free yg kononnya nak tapau bawak balik. pas tu because our pizza sampai lambat and other hangit sikit at the crust, the management bagi lagi another one free. so we had 3 large pizzas between the 2 of us! Although my friend ni kurus kedengking, dia kuat makan! Mengalahkan bagai ada membela je! I was sure the waiter gave me a filthy look when delivering the pizzas to our table. Apa nak buat, kan? Nasib si budak tembam.

Fat Cat Diary 5

Monty didn't come home last night. When i was walking Melly yesterday evening as soon as i got back from work, he was around. I saw his big fat face peering at me from the hedges. i know he was up to no good. Selalunya he'd come bouncing to greet me and gesel2 badan kat kaki i. But when he doesn't want to be found and has his own agenda, he would usually lay low. But i was not worried, i just left one window open last night and if he was hungry he'd come home. I asked the maid this morning if she had seen him in the house but she said no, was begining to get worried. Ye la, houses here takde pagar. Even though stray dogs are rarely to be seen, Monty had been chased by them once. With nothing to fence the intruder out, he was lucky that my neighbour was around then to shoo the dogs away. I thought, OK, sebelum pergi kerja ni kena pi cari si tembam. But as i was getting ready, i heard a familiar sound of bunyi loceng, and there was the fatty outside my bedroom door. Mummy's boy has come home.

I took Melly to the vet last week. She's still peeing once every hour. The vet told me that in 70%of cats, the cause of FLUTD (feline lower urinary tract disorder) is idiopathic. Basically, we don't know what causes her bladder to play up. She was given some more of the cystaid medication, 2X sehari. Stress!!! But as long as she gets better. On second thoughts, she is behaving much better at ubat time. What i do is to open up the capsules, pour the content into 3ML of milk and syringe it into her mouth. With lots of baby talk (I know I'm mad) and a coat brush afterwards.

Btw, i am seriously thinking of changing the pronounciation of her Ugi's name to U-ji instead of U-gi. Ugi comes from the word Ugly...ok, that's bad of me, but doesn't mean i love her any less (well, ok, Monty's my favourite). Little D calls her U-ji...and i don't think she's that bad looking anymore...if you look real hard, she has put on weight thus her face is rounder, she has some pointed hairs on her ears (like a lynx's), she has the softest voice and her coat is always so shiny.
I would have liked her name to be spelt Oogy..at least it's cute...but when MG took her for her first vaccination, he wrote down her name on the card at the vet as Ugi (such little imagination he has...) thus lekatlah ejaan tu. Ugi does everything in slow motion...for e.g. kalau nak masuk rumah after her walkies, she'd be doing it so slowly and 10 ekor nyamuk sempat masuk rumah sementara nak tunggu dia masuk ikut pintu.

Crossroads

Today is my first day back at work from the chicken pox fiasco. I have been away for nearly 3 months, kejap ada kejap takde. Kalau kerja private agaknya dah suruh tender in resignation dah.

There was nothing romantic about chicken pox like they potrayed on Friends...i.e. when Phoebe and the submarine guy got the pox. For a start, there was no officer and a gentleman for me. The "Jack D@wson" i have with me was busy (better not serenading another Rose!) and i have 2 kids mind you, how romantic a feeling can one get? Habis i garu like crazy, only the ones on my face were spared.

Today, the little boss asked me ke mana hala tuju i? Am i going to maintain status quo, nak pi sambung belajar or....to greener pasture? Frankly speaking, the first is really out of the question. I feel that i don't have the zest anymore in what i do compared to say, 5 years ago. My lack of enthusiasm shows.....i wish i could be doing something else but i don't have any other skills other than what i am trained to do. Venturing into private practice is really not for me because i do not enjoy the rigid schedule doing the same thing day in day out. Another option is to go for phD..but they say it is short form of permanent head damage. Do i really want to go through being a student again? Nanti kang i'd be doing it for all the wrong reasons i.e. the thought of staying where i am is more unimaginable. Decisions, decisions! And half the year is gone already.

Memang kena sembahyang istikharah ni..

Aku budak lolah

If you have been waiting for the outcome of my matchmaking scheme between my colleague's daughter and Siamang, sadly to say, zilch! Siamang sent her 2 smses but she didn't reply at all. Her mum thinks that the daughter is shy2 would probably reply lambat sikit but siamang said to me , podah!

Just as well, i couldn't go on hiding the truth from my colleague. She asked me these questions, how well i know the family (very well infact), can he masuk with other people's family (mm..well..yes..he was very pally with my brother, selalu lepak kat Kafe Batu Keras dulu), how was he at uni (let me see..he rode a bike, part time jadi cleaner, main 5-A side etc. etc.) . Basically the questions got more and more in depth..unless i was his ardent admirer or stalker or girlfriend (bingo!) i shouldn't be able to answer them so precisely!

When talking about his family, i terkenang kat nenek (wan) dia. She was this strong, matriach like N9 woman. She had her resrvations about me...that is understatement of the year, she disliked me. Tu belum pernah jumpa lagi tu. I memang hot ngan dia but of course i tak spell it out loud to siamang because he was closed to her..he called her as often as he called his mum.

One year i came back from summer hols and i brought back this kulat or cendawan whatever you call it. Yg dah dikeringkan and selalunya masak gulai lemak with it. Siamang rang his grandma from my place because rumah dia takde phone and he informed his grandma that i was in the kitchen cooking that blessed kulat. You know what that old woman said? Ko jangan makan, nanti mati kena racun (of course in thick N9 dialect). What the feck! What? Dia ingat i kutip benda tu kat dinding belakang rumah i???

At other times she'd be asking siamang where exactly is my hometown?? Ada jalan tar nak masuk ke rumah i ke?? Like pund## je kan. Helo...! It is probably as urban as Paroi Jaya! Siamang gelak je, menghumour org tua tu. Once she said to siamang, ko tak payah la nak kawin ngan budak Peghak tu, budak tu lolah, nanti susah nak bela. When Siamang got married, dia main punya suka because the menantu cucu was from N9, boleh omong2 channel yg sama. Tapi tuhan nak tunjukkan, siamang ex was found to be chronic hep B carrier! Ha! Ambik kau!

When she passed away Siamang smsed to inform me.
I said, sorry.
He said, is that all you have to say?
I said, yes. She was never nice to me. (Dalam hati cakap, eiii! She was and evil fussy pot)
He said, she never knew you!
I said, My point exactly!

So Wan si Siamang, wherever you maybe, rest in peace (and that's the nicest wish i can have for you).

Smog and curry

The smog is back. On Sunday afternoon, ada bau2 asap je kat hidung ni. And i thought, ni mesti kerja org2 gomen bercucuk tanam ni..i was riled! The only thing that was holding me back from jumping into the car and cruising kat tepi kebun tu (lagak cam stalker) was the spots on my face. Imagine twenty big 'jerawat batu' on the face plus putih2 calamine lotion tu. I looked hideous! (Since the local paper didn't publish my grouse, i was contemplating of writing to Pak Lah..not that he'd bother i'm sure. Little did i know that there was man-made peat fire near Dengkil).

When i was on leave (ceh, mcm sekarang tak on leave) i contemplated to menyahut seruan kerajaan of taking the public transport. Not so much of trying to be a good citizen but trying my best not to add pollution to earth (bunyi cam bagus je!)(rasa cam deja vu pulak, have i told this story before?). So one day i decided to check out the route to work. Off i went, all fresh around 9am, i hopped onto the ERL (RM19 return i think). So far so good. Nyaman je dlm train, org pun lawa2 (a ah, the steward and stewardeses airline yg van tak ferry the employees around). So far so good...Then tiba KL Sentral i had to make my way to the monorail station. Adoi, kena turun tangga yg sebesar 2 bontot i je, (kaki gue dah capek dah by this time), lalu celah2 bazaar, cross the road to get to the monorail station. At this time ketiak dah start bau kari (from the mamak restaurant nearby). Boleh tahan lagi ni...then got the monorail (RM2.50 one way) after 5 stops kut, alighted. Turun mega tangga, 5 mins walk to the big gate (entrance to work place) and another 5 mins walk nak sampai bawah bangunan i. Mak tuan!!! Masa tu dah takde catwalk2 dah. Ketiak dah belengaih kata org! Terus singgah canteen tibai 1 can of coke and 1 cornetto (RM4 altogether). Kata la i get to save about RM10 taking the public transport instead of driving, itupun lepas minus coke and other jajan to soothe and encourage niat murni ni, mungkin dapat save RM5 sehari je kut. But, i was hot! I smelled of curry, and i looked like i have been dragged through the bush, backwards!!! Sorry Pak Lah, i think i shall take the car, menghabiskan duit bayar petrol and tol as well as polluting the environment. I draw the line at smelling like curry.

(How people manage to look 'not hot and bothered'while taking public transport aku pun tak tau).

The curse

I've got the pox. Yes uols, i am so spotted now that if i were at the zoo, it's hard telling me apart from the leopard. On Wed straight after i got back from work, i jumped into the shower and washed my hair. Masa cuci rambut tu terasa eh napa my scalp ni ada benjol2 macam nak keluar aliens je? Bila i terjaga tengah malam tengok dah ada lesions kat lengan i as well as my abdomen. Obviously we know what it is! The first two days i thought, OK, kat muka ada satu dua cam jerawat je, not bad..but starting yesterday muka i cam org kena sengat lebah uol....habisla parut kat muka aku ni!!!! Pasrah aje la kan...yesterday dah start gatal2...i'm so not a disciplined person. When i was pegnant i scratch my tummy like nobody's bussiness sampaikan the marks on my tummy now looks like broken up caramel pudding. Ni tangan rasa gatal je nak menggaru...

Anyway, semasa bininya terlantar sakit, MG had his annual dinner. Apa yg menmunsykilkan was that no spouses are allowed or invited sama (i know ada gak company yg camni so i tak heran sangat tapi their staff seramai 30 org je according to MG. Kalau minus 4,5 org yg laki tak bagi datang apa sangatlah dinnernya kan? Anyway, don't mind me grumbling. Even if spouses were invited pun i was hardly in the position to party). They had to dress up as characters from movies. MG brought back this shiny, fluorescent, orange costume: an aladdin pants and a cute bolero. Just a bolero as a top! What the f@@@! Dalam hati i cakap, mamat ni biar betul! Dah buang tebiat ke? There is no way i am going to allow him in that costume: menayang segala bulu dada, perut, nipples pelbagai oops! Sib baik MG pun sedar diri and opted to put on a t-shirt underneath.

Nak dijadikan cerita, his colleague who was supposed to be Jack Dawson couldn't come and he had to take over because they did a sketch. I said Jack who? Aye? From Dawson's Creek???? Ngok, from Titanic la! So, MG got to say those famous lines 'íf you jump, i'll jump'. Oh no uols, that was the highlight of the decade for him, i keep hearing those lines now. He really fancies himself as Leonardo Di Caprio and it shall be another 2 weeks before the thing will die down. Kasi can la kan..

He was gone for the whole day, didn't come back until god knows what time because i pun dah tertidur. There i was, sick with the pox, manning the two kids, feeling sorry for myself...sib baik mamat tu menang 2nd prize 42 inch LCD tv in the lucky draw!! So, all is forgotten, at the end of the day, i pompuan yg ada ciri2 materialistic sikit..ye la..of course we expect something from our 'sacrifice' kan??? On second thoughts, why didn't he win the 1st prize plasma tv?? Hummph! He should have tried harder!