City Killer (1984)

 
Network: NBC
Original Airdate: October 28, 1984

As a genre that sort of falls somewhere in the middle of highbrow and lowbrow entertainment, the made for television movie was able to play around with expectations and the types of stories it could bring to viewers. But then somewhere in between the betweens of The Burning Bed and Diary of Teenage Hitchhiker lies another middle, where films that set out to entertain weren’t sure if they should aim for that high or low bar. One of those films, City Killer, which is somewhat befuddling and perhaps overly ambitious, is also, for the most part, high entertainment, thanks to an extremely engaging Terence Knox and some decent special effects.

And, then there’s that common trope of 1980s TV. We all loved Heather Locklear. Circa early – mid 1980s, Locklear was all over the, ahem, boob tube, appearing as a series regular on the popular T.J. Hooker, while also showing up periodically to stir the pot at the Carrington mansion in Dynasty. She also somehow managed to appear on things such as Love Boat and even Firestarter. So it’s no shock that the indefatigable charmer found the time to star in a Movie of the Week, although it is really what the MOW is about that makes City Killer so interesting (Sorry Heather, you’ve been upstaged by a mad bomber!).

Locklear is Andrea McKnight, a general workaholic who has a dog she never walks, and who also enjoys slightly warm relationships with her co-workers. But she tends to be a tad aloof, choosing to keep herself in a self-imposed state of solitude in her airy apartment (she could walk that dog once in a while though). Things take a weird turn when she comes home late one night to find an attractive, but creepy man waiting for her. He’s Leo (Terence Knox), an ex who would prefer to be a current. But considering how he picks locks and waits in the dark for pretty blondes, he's not made of great boyfriend material. Even worse, when Andrea flat out refuses his advances, he decides to blow up buildings to get her attention! Nicknamed The Love Bomber, Leo joyfully sets explosives throughout the city, eventually targeting Andrea’s job amongst other random buildings.

Enter Lieutenant “Eck” Eckford (Gerald McRaney), a handsome but humorless cop who is assigned to protect Andrea and bring Leo to justice. Mostly though, he seems almost as sinister as Leo, constantly telling Andrea that she’s a target because she’s “a very nice person,” who understands when a guy can't get an erection. Then he quietly ogles her. In short, I was sort of rooting for Leo.

City Killer is, pardon the expression, a blast. Locklear and McRaney seem to be phoning it in, but the supporting cast, especially Todd Susman, John Harkins (best know to me for playing Ham Lushbough on an episode of the Golden Girls), and Harkin’s little rodent co-star, not to mention the lovably weird Knox are up to the task of making the ridiculous material work. Knox in an absolute joy as crazy Leo and if anyone can make terrorism adorable, it’s this guy.

The screenplay was written by one of the stalwarts of the Movie of the Week, Michael Wood, who was responsible for the excellent telefilms Savages, Haunts of the Very Rich, Outrage and Death Car on the Freeway. By the 1980s, Wood was still penning some interesting fare, including The Execution and The Penthouse, but City Killer honestly seems a little below him. Don’t get me wrong, it is a fun film, but considering how small scale and intimate most of his TVMs are, it felt as though Wood was dipping into his Death Car repertoire and perhaps overshot expectations.

Director Robert Michael Lewis (Pray for the Wildcats, y'all!) moved predominately to TV movies by the 1980s, and this was just one of eight films he directed between 1983-1985! It appears some of the explosions were done with miniatures with the rest comprised of footage of actual demolitions, all to decent effect. Things go boom quite nicely, and you quickly understand that Leo isn't joking around! He pulverizes the city, and kills several people along the way… all in the name of amore. Awwww, ain’t love grand?

As entertaining as City Killer is, it may be worth noting that it can be an uncomfortable viewing in our post 9-11 world. It’s mostly a flight of fancy and is so gloriously over the top that it’s 99% inoffensive, but (and maybe this is just me) it can be difficult to watch buildings pancake, even all these years later. At the same time, it also sadly recalls a bygone era of innocence adding a nostalgic flavor to the proceedings… but Heather’s intense feather cut basically does the same thing without making you feel bad. City Killer is worth a watch. You’ll fall in love with Leo and root for the bad guy. It’s a good time.

US VHS release

Promotional still

Who cares?!? I love it!

Incredible foreign VHS art (image from Rare Cult Cinema)

Nature's Fury Blogathon: Ants (aka It Happened at Lakewood Manor, 1977)

Network: ABC 
Original Airdate: December 2nd, 1977 

Before I start any review, I always conduct cursory research on my chosen film and hope for the best. Some of the most famous TV movies have little to no information, and sometimes the most obscure movies pull up all kinds of stuff (Dude, I can read all about Sorority Kill even if I can’t watch it). Associated Press was a fickle beast is all I will say about it. And then, I’m just Googling-along all innocent-like for info on Ants, and one of the first returns is SUZANNE SOMERS BREASTS ANTS! Well, that just about sums up what is arguably the most iconic scene in Ants (aka It Happened at Lakewood Manor). But let’s be honest, Ants ain’t exactly rife with “iconic” images; however, it is certainly well regarded, and well remembered by those who caught it when they were young enough to accept some of the more ludicrous moments. Upon a recent rewatch of Ants for this review, I found that the film is even more delightful than I remembered. Crazy and inconceivable for sure, but also a bit darker in tone than I was expecting and a little icky too.

The plot is as straightforward as they come: When a construction site accidentally unearths a swarm of poisonous ants during a dig, nearby Lakewood Manor is overrun by the little guys. Chaos ensues.

Well, OK, so there’s a lot of melodrama in there too. This is what we call character development, and some of it is clunky and awkward, especially anything with Ethel, played by the great Myrna Loy. Now, I’ve seen Myrna in a few TV movies and she’s generally a treat (Do Not Fold, Spindle or Mutilate and The Elevator are two great examples), but it’s obvious that she was not into the material. However, the main stars Lynda Day George and Robert Foxworth make the most of what’s been given to them, and I actually felt invested in watching them crawl out of that hotel shaped anthill with all their lovely bits intact.

Most of the subplots are romance driven, which is always a plus for my starry-eyed inclinations. For example, Valerie (George) and Mike (Foxworth... or Foxy-worth as I have been known to call him), who make one of the most gorgeous made up couples ever, are interested in getting Valerie’s mom, Ethel to sell Lakewood Manor so they can move to San Francisco and live happily ever after... and send her mom packing to Florida. There’s also a pretty and hippie-ish drifter named Linda (Karen Lamm) who is tired of life on the road and hooks up with OMG gorgeous Richard (Barry Van Dyke), and love instantly blossoms. Heck, even the construction inspector (Anita Gillette) seems to have a bit of chemistry with the ant expert (Bruce French)!

And, if it isn’t about falling in love, it’s about the end of love, such as the story with Marjorie (Barbara Brownell) who is staying at the Manor with her son, Tommy (the forever adorable Moosie Drier) as she recovers from a divorce. And, of course no epic TV movie about insect invasions is complete without a little sinful love, and we get that with Miss Antsonbreasts herself, Gloria (Somers) and the evil Tony (Gerald Gordon) who is obviously lecherous and easily tagged as the guy who’s going to mess everything up. He does it in a spectacular fashion though, so all is forgiven. See, TV movies have never been about subtlety, which works in the favor of this compact, and economical little disaster/insect amok flick.

But, despite all of the romantic shenanigans, audiences really showed for the creepy-crawly treachery, and it is done very well. While I miss the Empire of the Ants ant-cam, there’s plenty of up close vermin shots, and lots of brave actors let those buggers crawl all over them (the above referenced Somers to name but one). And no one is safe from potential victimization. There’s a great scene with Tommy frantically jumping into a pool even though he can’t swim because he’s covered in coffee grounds… er, I mean... ants. Yikes.

There is also a fantastic firetruck ladder stunt, which leads to an OK helicopter stunt that ends with a horde obnoxious stunt onlookers finding themselves in the line of fire. At this point, I was definitely rooting for the ants.

The ant expert gives us the lowdown on why the ants are out for blood: buried for years, these insects have sucked up all of the toxins we humans have tried to entomb and hide away within the earth. Yes, humans are pretty much to blame for everything, so I’ll buy it. But, then we are told these ants, which have already killed at least two people and injured a few more, aren’t aggressive if you are just real still. So, then we get a shot of three actors sitting motionless with little tubes (made out of 1970s wallpaper!) in their mouths so they can breathe. I remember when I first saw this as an adult and I wondered if it was really so hard to step on them and just leave? But, ludicrous is part and parcel for our little insect amok flicks, and I’ve learned to take my ant havoc with a grain of salt. Wait, doesn’t salt kill ants? Hmmm, maybe they could have done that?

In the confident hands of journeyman TV director Robert Scheerer (Changing Scene, Poor Devil and tons of episodic fare), and with a script by TV movie veteran Guerdon Trueblood (The Love War, Sole Survivor, and Ants' companion Tarantulas: The Deadly Cargo), and thanks to the actors who wanted to be there (and also to Myrna for just showing up cuz I still love her so), Ants is a good reminder that even if a telefilm doesn’t get under your skin (ha!) television factory filmmaking was often much better than it should have been.

This review is part of Cinematic Catharsis's excellent Nature's Fury Blogathon! Check out more of the reviews here and here. 

A Town Has Turned to Dust (1998)

Network: Sci-Fi Channel
Original Airdate: June 27th, 1998

Before the SyFy Channel (then Sci-Fi) produced A Town Has Turned to Dust in 1998, the original story and its many adaptations already had a long, and varied history. Originally conceived as a stage play about racial injustice, and inspired by the horrifying death of Emmett Till, Rod Serling wrote Noon on Doomsday, intending to showcase the power behind defying and inverting mob mentality to create a proper justice system. Although it was met with a bit of controversy, a recording of that play was produced by the United States Steel Hour and aired on April 25, 1956. This version was directed by Daniel Petrie and featured both Jack Warden and Lois Smith (I loves me some Lois!).

It was then restructured into a story about the lynching of a Mexican boy and how this act haunted the townspeople who did nothing to prevent it. This version, titled A Town Has Turned to Dust was produced as part of the Playhouse 90 series, and originally aired on June 19th, 1958. It also featured some fine people working on and off camera, including renowned director John Frankenheimer, and actors such as Rod Steiger, William Shatner and James Gregory, among others.

Then (are you following this?), Serling adapted his story yet again for a Twilight Zone episode titled Dust, which explores how the opportunistic prey on the desperate. This episode aired January 6th, 1961. (For more on Dust, check out Tom Elliot's amazing Twilight Zone podcast. Details with links can be found at the end of this review.)

Jump ahead some three decades later to a completely (well almost) unrelated event. In the early 1990s, the Sci-Fi Channel (I hate writing SyFy... whoops! There I go!) began producing original films, the first of which was titled Homewrecker (OAD: December 17, 1992), which debuted in their Planetary Premiere slot. The incredible Fred Walton (When a Stranger Calls) directed this telefilm about a computer who falls in love with its programmer, and features Robby Benson as the aforementioned hottie coding nerd, and Kate Jackson as the voice of the computer! Not that this film fared so well critically, but, following in the footsteps of the USA Original, it is a reminder of the early days of cable and how they took a page out of the book of old school network programming.

So, with all of that in mind, sashay up to 1998 when Sci-Fi gave yet another nod to golden age TV and re-adapted A Town Has Turned to Dust, restructuring it yet again as a post-apocalyptic tale about a beaten down town divided by the indigenous peoples and the settlers seeking mob justice (and, ultimately, the price they pay for such an act).

Whew! That’s a lot of history for what is a fairly by the numbers, but arguably watchable, made for television movie that essentially came and went. Director Rob Nilsson was a bit of a indie film scene renegade, pioneering the video to film transfer, which would help revolutionize the digital filmmaking of today. I remember Nilsson’s Heat and Sunlight (1987), which was completely improvised, and shot in black and white. And while, quite honestly, I wasn’t all that taken with the film, it would seem Nilsson was an incredibly interesting choice to direct Town. At this point, he had never worked in television (and as far as I know, had not worked in the sci-fi genre either), and was an indie filmmaker who thought outside the box. What better way to re-introduce Serling’s work than with another outsider who had a better understanding of film as art than most workmanlike TV movie directors (not a slate against my TVM guys, just to be clear).

However, maybe that was the issue. TV movies have to accomplish big ideas with very little time or money. For his part, Nilsson assembled a great cast, which includes Ron Perlman, Judy Collins (!), and Stephen Lang, but while it seems fairly faithful to Serling’s story at least in terms of themes (in fact, Serling gets sole writing credit), it just doesn’t click the way it should. Subsequently, Town was met with mediocre reviews, both People magazine and Entertainment Weekly were less than impressed with the final product, with People aptly synopsizing Town as a “disappointing trip back to the future.”

So, what went wrong? It’s hard to pinpoint. Town is not necessarily a bad film, but it’s not very good either. It lacks pacing, and doesn’t have the emotional oomph it should, especially considering the rich subject matter and source material. Part of the problem stems from its futuristic setting, because even with all that neat red dust and dystopian imagery, the story feels completely dated. There is an awkward mix of apocalyptic towns dubbed “New Angeles” and that old school approach to the themes of race and class.

What it does have going for it though is genuine performances from all involved. Lang is particularly good, even if the character isn’t all that memorable, and Perlman is appropriately sleazy. It’s really too bad that things didn’t work out for Town because although it is playing with traditional beats, it unfortunately presents what seems to be a timeless tale of marginalization and the sad state of mob mentality. Perhaps Town is due for another retelling, but instead of trying to update the story with spiffy modern visuals, it should concentrate on its original inspiration and reflect on whether or not the world has changed much since Till’s death. Now, that would be a chilling tale.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This review was inspired by Tom Elliot's excellent Twilight Zone podcast. In the latest episode Tom takes an in-depth look at Dust, which is yet another adaptation of Town. You can download the episode via the site or through iTunes. (Also check out Tom's other podcast The Strange and Deadly Show while you're at it, cuz it's, like, the best thing ever!)

TV Movie Marathoning!

Oh, the glamour! 

I made it through another semester, and to celebrate, I watched a gaggle of TVMs! I thought it would be fun to jot down some brief thoughts on each film, making it a one-woman-blogathon!

Eyes of a Stranger 
Network: NBC
Original Airdate: December 7th, 1992

First up was this early 90s curio starring the babe-a-licious Parker Stevenson and the gorgeous Emma Samms as an upper class couple who run afoul of a two-bit hoodlum (Michael Easton), and his lovely professor/girlfriend (Joan Chen, working some nifty silver flats in the last scene). The couple's lives collide during a rainstorm, and all paths lead to accidental murder, badly thought out cover-ups, some not bad small screen sex scenes and exploding boats.

Written and directed by Richard Friedman, the mastermind behind the goofy but lovable Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge, Stranger is a bit of a convoluted mess. The worst issue was the timeline. For example, Samms finds a videotape on a boat, and after some major mayhem, the boat is burnt to a crisp, and then at least two days pass before the tape comes into question again. Samms tells someone she found the tape yesterday, which would have been impossible.

It’s also ridiculously predictable, but watchable because of the cast, and the overall confident and slick look of the film. I wouldn’t be surprised if a sexier version of this movie exists, but was edited for television. It has all the markings of those early 90s erotic thrillers that I enjoy so much. Interesting then, that it was produced by Doris Keating, whose father directed such films as The Diary of Knockers McCalla and Fanny Hill Meets Dr. Erotico. I don’t necessarily recommend this to anyone except the Samms or Stevenson completest. Since I fall into the latter, I can’t really complain. Stevenson takes off his shirt just enough to keep me interested! Yes, I'm superficial, and easy to please.

Valentine Magic on Love Island 
Network: NBC 
Original Airdate: February 15, 1980

As if Supertrain wasn’t enough of a disaster for NBC, the execs tried to put a spin on Love Boat and Fantasy Island yet again in this choppy, and chaotic romantic comedy that is somewhat watchable and sometimes fun, but not nearly as great as the similar Three on Date.

Eight singles visit Love Island in the hopes of becoming four couples, and… hmmm… if I do my math correctly, yeah, I think we do end up with four couples. I guess that’s a testament to how haphazard the whole thing is, that I had go back through my mind to remember what happened (and the movie just ended 10 minutes ago). Still, gotta love (even if just a little) anything that stars Bill Daily, Lisa Hartman, Dominique Dunne, Christopher Knight, Janis Page, Adrienne Barbeau and Dody Goodman, right? And that’s just part of the game cast, who make the most of the crap material they were handed. (Random trivia: This was the second time Knight and Dunne appeared in a TVM together. The other telefilm was 1979's Diary of a Teenage Hitchhiker)

Paige is the Mr. Roarke who mixes up her “white” magic in the hopes of helping people reach complete coupledom (or consciously couple as the young kids might say). Of course, there has to be a little mismatching and mischief first, where little to no hilarity ensues, but there’s a pretty cool costume party. Unfortunately, this Dick Clark production does not have a good beat and I had a hard time dancing to it (see what I did there). But, like the small screen sucker I am, it was good to finally see it.

Sorry, Wrong Number 
Network: USA
Original Airdate: October 11, 1989

This movie has been on my “To Watch” list for what seems like forever. A TVM based on a theatrical film, which was based on a radio play sparked my interest, and yes, I like Loni’s TVMs quite a bit (thinking of My Mother’s Secret Life right at this moment!), and it’s a USA Original… and… and… well, you get my drift. Despite mixed reviews, there are some films I simply need to see for myself. Luckily, although this remake isn’t, like, the best movie ever or anything, it’s a pretty fun timewaster with a surprisingly suspenseful ending.

Loni is Madeline, a Dynasty-rich invalid who has a wild New Year's Eve getting her lines crossed over and over again. Overhearing two men planning a murder of an unknown woman in Madeline’s neighborhood, this housebound heiress starts to uncover the mystery behind her strained marriage, and the real danger that lurks just outside of her door. Slick and confident, Sorry is also helped by a wonderfully capable cast including Patrick Macnee, Hal Holbrook, and OMG hawt Carl Weintraub. It’s not like you don’t know where this one is going, but the wonderful pacing and crisp and glamorous aesthetics are well worth a look. My favorite of the three films I watched.

I also took two naps. It was a great day.

Doctors' Private Lives (1978)

Network: CBS
Original Airdate:March 20th, 1978

During promotion for the soapy telefilm Doctors' Private Lives, the film’s star, John Gavin said, “Barbara [Anderson] plays my wife, and Donna [Mills] plays a widow with whom I become involved. But only physically and emotionally. It doesn’t go any deeper than that.”

If I could insert the sound of a car braking right here I would. As is stands, I just have to giggle at Gavin’s comedic response to starring in one of the most overwrought melodramas I’ve seen in some time. In his defense, Gavin does not play it tongue in cheek during the film, and it’s all the more entertaining for the straight-faced, and genuine performances from an amiable cast of wonderfully familiar faces.

And anyway, Gavin had me at Donna Mills.

Gavin is Dr. Jeffrey Latimer, a gorgeous and successful professional married to the equally sublime Frances (Barbara Anderson looking ridiculously divine), who is just as ambitious with saving the world as he is with saving lives. The one hiccup in an otherwise perfect relationship is that they have no children. This obstacle doesn’t seem like that much of an issue, until Jeffrey embarks on an extramarital affair with Dr. Beth Demery (the perfectly perfect Donna Mills), a widow who can’t fight her attraction to Jeffrey (I don’t blame her). Strangely, and maybe sadly, Jeffrey loves his wife, but has an affair just because he can. The scoundrel (and he's our hero)!

While all of this is going down (insert dirty joke here), Dr. Mike Wise (Ed Nelson, dusting off his Peyton Place dialog delivery) is dealing with a divorce and the generation gap, which is driving his son Kenny (Leigh McCloskey) away from medical school. Kenny has an adorable girlfriend named Sheila (Robin Mattson), who quickly throws him over for his dear old dad, creating even more tension in the house. And in-between all of this, people die, there’s blackmail and an airplane full of Korean orphans (!) crashes! If that’s not an overflow of awesome, I am not sure I know what is.

Yessir, from the ski slopes to the operating room to the bedroom, Doctors' Private Lives is one of those glamorous 1970s telefilms that I live for. It’s got philandering, conniving, and well to do professionals who wear the best clothes, drink the best wine and sometimes deliver the best lines. Although, admittedly, I was surprised to see it was released in 1978, only about one month before Dallas premiered, setting the bar for high drama. Dallas is far more nuanced and complex, but Doctors makes the best of what is has, and what is has is pretty good. Along your journey through soapland, you’ll catch John Randolph as Mike’s gregarious uncle, Elinor Donahue as Mike’s grumpy ex, and Anne-Marie Martin as a sexy nurse secretly romancing her friend’s man. And for the record, Randy Powell, who went on to Dallas, plays one of the worst extortionists ever. That's how you do it!

And I’m apparently not the only one who feels this way. Doctors' Private Lives was successful enough that a 4-part followup mini-series aired the following year, featuring much of the same cast, and the addition of another familiar Dallas face, William Smithers, who played the contemptible Jeremy Windell. It makes the whole affair feel full circle (emphasis on affair).

And remember, in an era of car chases and gun fights, Gavin points out, “[There’s] no violence in this show, except in the bedroom.”

‘Nuff said.

Heatwave (1974)

Network: ABC
Original Air Date: January 26th, 1974

Summer is just around the corner, so why not dive right in with… Heatwave? Yeah, probably not the best movie to watch before the onslaught of the scorching season. But it was raining the other night and it just seemed like the right movie at the right time. And wouldntyaknowit? Heatwave is pretty good.

Ben Murphy is Frank Taylor. He’s working in the financial sector, but is in one of those I-have-to-wear-a-tie-but-get-paid-crap type of positions. It makes him cranky. He has an adorable wife named Laura (Bonnie Bedelia). What she lacks in cranky she makes up for in pregnancy. She is about to P.O.P. Life is tough for everyone in L.A., but this down and out couple are splitting at the seams because of the heat, and decide to take a break and head for the hills. Unfortunately, their car is stolen and the heat is just as intense on the picturesque mountains as it is in the city. The baby arrives, and then the real problems start.

Disaster movies on the small screen were not an unusual occurrence in the 1970s. In fact, the Master of Disaster, Irwin Allen shrunk the scope and made a few decent timewasters, including Fire, Flood and The Night the Bridge Fell Down. He didn’t have a hand in Heatwave, and maybe that’s a good thing because the filmmakers took Irwin’s more grandiose flourishes down a notch, shrinking the cast and chaos, bringing a more intimate story to the forefront.

The movie starts in Los Angeles, and, certainly, if done right, watching the residents go insane in the heat might have been really incredible. But instead screenwriters Peter Allan Fields and Mark Weingart (based on a story by Herbert F. Solow, who also produced) focus on the hapless Taylors, who frankly see no end to their woes. I was surprised by how human the film was, and how it rejected only showing people at their worst, opting to place a nice little rainbow across the blazing sun (as the eternal optimist, I related).

The cast is full of familiar, likable faces, including the gorgeous Murphy who unsurprisingly rocks a pair of glasses, and who manages to stay a good guy even when his disposition is vinegarish. Bedelia is easy to root for, and while I think I prefer her more enigmatic turns in Sandcastles and Then Came Bronson, she makes the most of the beleaguered mom-to-be role. But the big draw here is catching the great character actors David Huddleson, Lew Ayres, John Anderson and Dana Elcar. The telefilm seldom had the luxury of big budgets, total artistic freedom or long shoots, but they almost always had extraordinary performers, who brought oodles of charisma to the plate. Huddleson is the standout as the maybe-heartless opportunist trying to cash in on the misery of others, but everyone is great to see, and their presence definitely brings the film up a notch.

Director Jerry Jameson brought four small screen disaster flicks to television in 1974 (along with Heatwave, he also helmed Terror on the 40th Floor, Hurricane and The Elevator)! Obviously no stranger to claustrophobic catastrophes, Jameson was a pro at generating an oppressive atmosphere within the brisk 74 minute running time. Certainly, Heatwave is not going to bring about world peace, but it is fairly engrossing, and a nice way to spend an afternoon. Just bring a cool glass of water with you!