Promise hide a mis inside

Am I over trust a person?
The one I told them I wont have a secret and I think I can share because I trust them
However, others people secret I wont tell others
I always keep my promise to the one who willing to told me
Because they trust me
This is the faith I always believe and keep it
Promise always very important for me

When third party ask me
" Do you tell anyone else"
That time I try to think and think very hard, again and again
" Who else I told them?"
And I surely answer the third party
"No one"

The moment the third party told me that the one who tell them is 

The one who I not aware on

The one I truly believe in

I quite a bit shocked

Suddenly I think that am I over trust a person

Is it I dont have any awareness to the person that I think I close with?

The one who ask me to keep the secret is the one who tell my stuff to others

How fool I am...

I dont blame anyone but I blame myself

Not because I over trust a person

Is because I make the misunderstanding become deeper

I make the conflict among them become deeper

That's my fault

All the time I try to convince them to try to know more about each other 

I just hope that they change their perspective to the person and can getting better 

But I did a thing that just make the situation become worse

At the same time, I just hurt a innocent person that didnt know anything 

The person shouldnt involve in this conflict

I might be make others misunderstanding the person who innocent 

I feel guilty...

I feel sorry to the person who dont know I hurt him or her

Believe really hide a lie inside there

Promise also hide a mis inside

I should aware on it

Executive Board Application

Finally I sent my application form for Executive Board AIESEC Year 2011/2012
Seriously, I not satisfied for my application
At the beginning, I already made a big mistake
This mistake REALLY is a big mistake
I didnt read the instruction clearly
This is a common sense from primary school
During exam, teacher always said read true the instructions


But I made this mistake again.
The question only request to answer the top choice 
And I answered the questions for my 3 choices...-.-
Sigh~
I wasted my time...
I used my time to answer the questions that unnecessary and not familiar for me


When I wished to send 
I read through the instruction again 
Then I just realized it.
That time I really fell down....


All those questions I really spent much time to answer it
Actually If I just focus on my top choice
I can answer much more better on it.
I just came out the plans hasty
And If I got more time to think, I know that I can came out a better plans
However, in reality, No IF...


Last night I really stress to answer all those question
I ran out of idea to answer it
After 12am I already lost myself.
Time sent the application form is related to the impression you gave to interviewer
Although I really dont know the detail about it
But I promise to send it as early as possible


Thinking too much always is my weakness
I started care about others people
I kept in mind that I will be the last one send the form that time
I started blame myself that I should start to fill the application early 
but not last minute 


Fortunately, a friend asked my about my application
And I kept blaming myself and I kept telling him I will be the last one
That time I really want to cry already because I still got a lot of questions need to answer
He just told me take my time to answer it
Dont caring others but caring your own application
A short conversation can made me wake up


thank him inspired and encouraged me when i felt sad... 
When I low power, thanks for giving me power to move forward.. 
Thanks for remind me what is the most important thing.. 
Thank you so much for everything.... 
So luckily you're there..

Failure in my first interview in university

Just last week i went to first interview for becoming the committee of accounting society...
Unfortunately, i just know that i eliminated...

This is my first interview in usm...
And i dont know how i feel now....
Just think that i am not good enough...

Before i know the result,
i still have a small ray of hope...
When others received the message they get the second interview,
i still hope that my handphone rings...

Waited awhile...
i totally know that i eliminated,
that time i really felt sad...
i just try to ask why dont just give me one chance...
Am i really the worse one??

Now i am in university,
after graduate,
I have to adapt myself to society,
I have interview to get my job,
no more practice there,
i know that chance waiting for no one...
Just like a competition,
who run faster, who will be the winner...

What i have to do now is...
Learn what i have to learn in university,
Learn from mistakes
Practice more...
That why i'm being here...

And i hope that i can do it...