Showing posts with label comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label comedy. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 20, 2023

Hump Day Holiday Humor

After a lot of hours of taking pictures and editing them in the past 24 hours or so – plus making some holiday treats – I'm thinking I'm not the only one could use some stress-relieving hump day holiday humor.

First, I love that area news stations are sharing this funny map. I mean it's funny to me since I am not dreaming of a white Christmas – not with the kids driving halfway across the country for a cool Jul. Let's just keep all the severe and wacky weather patterns on hold for the rest of the year, please.

And this made me giggle inappropriately (sorry, not sorry) on this hump day. I'm not mocking the real Christmas story in any way. Just struck me as funny. And I needed a good morning laugh!

This took me a minute and then I also laughed out loud. I think the stress of the holidays may have turned me into immature 13-year-old boy who snorts like Beavus and Butthead. Lord, help me! 

Thankfully I only have to work one more day for the rest of the year! Then I'll let humor – and Hallmark, of course – de-stress me.

Finish strong, everyone!
 

Thursday, May 18, 2023

Off the Rails Date Night


Hubby and I finally celebrated Valentine's Day tonight in grand style at The Grand Theater in Wausau. Well, we used the tickets I bought him, that is. And seeing comedian Lewis Black in person was pretty darn cool.

We've been fans of this sharp-witted, sharp-tongued sense of humor and sarcastic rants for a long time. He was a regular on the Bob and Tom Show we'd listen to on the radio on our hour commute to Iola for 10-plus years. We've also seen him on the Daily Show and very funny guest appearance on Big Bang.

We headed up to Wausau after Jim got home from baseball practice. Since The Grand is located on the 400 block, we parked near the theater and walked to check out nearby restaurants. And who should we run into behind the theater but the man of the hour...


After gushing all over him like a fan girl, Mr. Black happily obliged to a selfie with us. We really couldn't stop smiling after that. How cool, right?

And after a quick Italian dinner at Ciao, we resumed our smiling and laughing until after 10 p.m. My face hurts!

But boy did we need that! Other than running into a former co-worker, there was 4 blissful hours of no thoughts about work or any stressors in life. Just like running into Mr. Black in the back alley, the timing of this date night was impeccable.

Laughter might just be the best medicine!

Sunday, December 4, 2022

Ugly for the Win


I'm starting to understand how an ugly Christmas sweater could be the winner of anything. We were actually able to watch the Vikings on our TV today. And it was ugly. And they won. But it was ugly.

Somehow we find ourselves at 10-2 for the first time in a long minute, and we're too cautious (read: burned dozens of times in the past) to get excited just yet. But I did wear purple to church this morning to garner all the good spiritual vibes I could!

Speaking of spirit...

After the early football games were done, my friend Cindy and I went to see the movie Spirited. I think it's loosely billed as a Christmas musical. I say that because neither Will Ferrell or Ryan Reynolds are particularly good singers.

But I don't have a problem staring at Ryan for 127 minutes, do you?

Anyway, it's hilarious. Not for super little kids since there are some mature themes and language you wouldn't want a 5-year-old repeating. But for adults – entertaining as heck. And so funny. And a few pretty catchy holiday songs. And honestly, not a bad a plot line. Though I think it's meant to be mostly predictable that way.

Anyway, see it if you need a new Christmas movie in your life! Plus we need to get this movement of telling people "good afternoon" going. 

That might be a little bit too ugly. If you know, you know. See the movie and you'll know!

 


Monday, July 25, 2022

Oh, That's Nutty


Love this. There is definitely joy in finding people who love you for your weird self. Though "weird" is subjective.

On Saturday as we were driving through Green Bay on the way to a wedding, we got to a stoplight and hubby says something along the lines of "Dang. And here I thought YOU were the biggest nut in the state."

Then I turn my head and see he was looking at this...

Funny guy, eh? And yeah, I know I'm nutty, but nutty can be funny. Right? Right? 

And side note: I didn't ask him to elaborate if I was just a "nut" or a "nut job" or if I just have a screw loose. Don't need to know the details. He's stuck with all 3 of me! I mean, I'm sure he loves all sides of the weird, strange, and nutty me. 

And he also knows I love a good pun. So calling me a big nut in this case was well played. Very well played. I'll laugh about it eventually – when I get over my disappointment that I didn't come up with it first!

Hope you find your own joy this week!

Saturday, November 13, 2021

Gratitude Challenge Day 13 :: Funny

They say laughter is the best medicine. And I believe it. Even when you laugh so hard you can't breathe – as shown in this picture of spontaneous laughter from sister weekend – it still feels so good.

Day 13. Something funny.

I am grateful that I find plenty of moments to smile and laugh each day. It helps that my hubby has a great sense of humor and that when he's not around, I crack myself up. Hey, I'm a great audience! 

But I do love hearing funny stories or great puns. 

We had a wedding today for Jim's cousin's daughter. There was always a funny anecdote shared during the toasts at tonight's reception. Even if you didn't know some of the people involved in the little stories, they were still worth a chuckle at least. 

Especially when the DJ informed the crowd that the bride and groom would not kiss if you clinked your glasses. You had to come up and tell a story about them. So one of the little flower girls went up there, grabbed the mic and said, "Once upon a time, Hannah and Gary got married. And they lived happily ever after!"  

How precious is that?

Humor is often best when it's not planned out – despite the popularity of comedians. Jim and I still laugh about something funny Carter said years and years ago. And it was about being funny of all things...

It was probably his most memorable "lost in translation" moment. I don't recall exactly what it was that Carter did or said, but we told him he was funny. He said, "Like Larry?" And we're thinking, Larry who? Is that an imaginary friend or what? So we ask him, "Like Larry?" And he replies, "Yeah, funny how Larry is."

How Larry is. 

How. Larry. Is? 

Oh, that's how-larry-is. Hilarious!

Every time we'd hear something and point out it's was hilarious, he thought we were saying that's "how Larry is"! 

That is hilarious, isn't it?

Thank you, Lord, for reason to smile! So grateful.

#gratitudemonth

Thursday, November 12, 2020

J is for Just Blessed

 

Our alphabetical gratitude month continues today with the letter J which means am just so blessed!

A = Autumn, Austins, Assumption
B = Ballots, Books, Book Club, Bible
C = Casey, Clay, Carter, Church, Creativity, Camera
D = Dad, Daughters, Deck Chair, Dar, Design
E = Eggs, Election, Energy, Empty Nest
F = Family, Friends, Faith, Flu Shot, FastForward
G = Games, Golf, Guilty pleasures
H = Hugs, Hurricanes, Humor
I = Ice cream, Impromptu Invitations

Jim: You saw that one coming, too, didn't you? I would hope so. He's my much, much, much better half.  He does the laundry and cleans the toilets. And best of all, loves me for me. And that's a huge undertaking. I've obviously hit the jackpot! Did I mention his sense of humor? He's quite the jokester, in that sly funny way that makes me laugh or makes me mad when I don't realize he's just joking. But he has the biggest heart. Ever. 


And even after 23-plus years bothering each other, I still love him to the moon and back and even to Jupiter and back. Blessed doesn't cover it.

Jokes: Speaking of joking around, though. I do love the occasional clever pun. OK, as often as I can hear them, read them, think them, say them. I'm like my mom that way. In fact, Jim had emailed some pun-filled jokes recently to share with mom the next time I talked to her. So tonight when I called her I said, "Oh Mom, I have to tell you some jokes Jim sent me." She replies, "He sent you? Aren't you living together anymore?" Oh gosh. I forget my 88-year-old mother doesn't realize we say sent emails or sent texts. It's not send me a letter via USPS from some other house not on Blue Jay Drive. I had Jim talk to her a few minutes just to allay her concerns. Funny, not funny. Right? Jeez, Mom.

Job: I never thought I'd do anything other than being a newspaper reporter or editor. Then I got into magazines and online publishing. Then, after a brief stint in the ed-tech sector, I'm writing creatively (mostly) in a growing marketing department at an insurance company of all things. And I love it! I feel especially grateful in 2020, that I have a job and that I can do that job from my home office. Even though I may jest that this is Day 252 in captivity, I am beyond blessed to be in this situation!

Java: Finally, I couldn't handle any of these blessings today without my morning coffee! And anyone I come into contact with before noon is grateful for what my energy juice does for me. Yes, I am a princess and require tasty flavors in my Keurig (ope, a K word for tomorrow) or flavored creamer. Still, I drink it. I like it. Plus, once you're 50, you deserve to spoil your jolly self. And you don't have to explain yourself. Judge away.

#gratitudemonth #gratitudealphabet

Tuesday, November 10, 2020

Heart-Felt Blessings

Our alphabetical gratitude month continues today with the letter H which stands for blessings of the Heart.

A = Autumn, Austins, Assumption
B = Ballots, Books, Book Club, Bible
C = Casey, Clay, Carter, Church, Creativity, Camera
D = Dad, Daughters, Deck Chair, Dar, Design
E = Eggs, Election, Energy, Empty Nest
F = Family, Friends, Faith, Flu Shot, FastForward
G = Games, Golf, Guilty pleasures

Hugs: I didn't realize until the coronavirus took over the world how much I take human touch for granted. I miss hugs! Social distancing is not for huggers! I miss giving and receiving a heart-felt embrace that can deliver everything from comfort to love to strength. Hugs are just plain magical. Too bad they can't double as our vaccine.

Hurricanes: OK, I'm cheating. I am grateful we do NOT get hurricanes in central Wisconsin. Today though...


More than 2 1/4 inches of rain. And it was still raining. I just had to take the picture before it got dark. So yeah, I'm grateful it's not accompanied by gale-force winds or, in a lot normal November instances, ice or snow. We don't board up our windows around here. Sometimes we use a hair dryer to add plastic wrap in the winter. But that's about it.

Humor: Holy cow. Where would we be without humor? I get my sarcasm-poking fun humor from my dad and my clever with a side of pun humor from my mom. Of course, growing up we don't think anything our parents do is funny or remotely entertaining. Now, though, I am so blessed they passed it on! I'm hilarious! Ha. I obviously passed on the helping of humble pie.

Hope: Today I'm most grateful that despite the poop show that is 2020, I still have hope. If I can say that on Post-Washington Trip :: Day 250, then anyone can! Even in this climate of negativity and unrest, I still witness random acts of kindness. And it gives me hope that humans will act with more humanity. We can do this. If you don't see kindness, be kindness.

If all else fails, HUG it out! Hug it out.

#gratitudemonth #gratitudealphabet

Thursday, February 21, 2019

Uff Da, Dat's Good Lutheran Humor


A couple of years ago, I had the joy (much joy and laughter) of seeing the musical comedy Church Basement Ladies. Tonight, I got to see one of the sequels to it – this time focusing on the church basement guys. Uff da. Church Basement Ladies – Rise Up O Men was a hoot.

Maybe it helps to be both Lutheran and Norwegian. Totally my kind of humor.

I know you're wondering how I could have time for such frivolity one night before Camp Crop-A-Lot. Well, I'm ready. When our friend Lisa texted hubby and me Tuesday night and said she needed a date to this, Jim passed and I jumped on it. So, I've kicked butt in the "getting ready" category and freed up my night.

Worth it.


Very fun Church Ladies Night Out. Like my hubby, Lisa is Catholic, but there were plenty of jokes for "those people who eat fish on Fridays." Saw several friends from my church, too. I'm pretty sure they'll agree it was pretty spot-on.

Just nice to get out, not think about any "to do" projects, just listen and laugh.

Now it's off to bed because my weekend starts NOW.


Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Comic Relief


After waking up to news a relative had died during the night, I didn't think today would end on a high note. But it just kept getting more entertaining.

There's a segment of the population that does not think golf is entertaining.

They haven't seen me golf.

Tonight was our first night for golf league at SentryWorld, which is part of our campus at work. It's an employee league and we have two foursomes from our Marketing Department that alternate weeks. It was our turn today. My buddy Tom (who we've known since working together in Iola) and three ladies who don't know how to take the game seriously. Well, we want to. Just aren't skilled and capable. Very much his comic relief!

Good thing it's the noncompetitive fun league. We had a blast. I was so proud of not losing any balls. And then I blew it and lost 3 – yes 3, a tough course – on the last hole. Wowza. Score not good. But on a positive note... no mosquitoes!

From there, I raced back to Rapids (within the speed limit, of course) to meet a few book club members at the movie The Book Club. Good thing they saved me a seat. It was basically sold out. One, it's $5 movie night. And two, I think every book club in town was there. What a hoot! Loved the movie. Just laugh out loud funny.

Sometimes we just need to laugh. It just feels good, doesn't it?

Sunday, April 8, 2018

Holy Rollers on the Floor Laughing


Probably fitting that Easter fell on April Fools Day this year – the empty tomb had to be the biggest prank ever – and now a week later, we have Holy Humor Sunday.

Yes, it's a real thing!

Many American churches are resurrecting an old Easter custom begun by the early Greek Christians – "Bright Sunday" or "Holy Humor Sunday" celebrations on the Sunday after Easter. For centuries in all Christian faith traditions, the week following Easter Sunday was observed by the faithful as "days of joy and laughter" with parties and picnics to celebrate Jesus' resurrection. So it makes perfect sense.

And our substitute pastor did an outstanding job with it today! Pastor Dale and I have humor right up the same, pun-ny alley.

Among other fun, we had a few knock-knock jokes...

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce pray.

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Oliver.
Oliver who?
Oliver answers are in the Bible if you look.

And right before offering...

Knock-knock.
Who's there.
Phillip.
Phillip who?
Phillip the plates when they pass by.

See? Funny ha-ha. I love that stuff!! He was right when he referenced the Family Circus comic strip...


There's always a good lesson that when you spread love and joy, it grows – and comes back to you.

Good stuff. It put me in a good mood all day. Such a good mood I even went for a run (not a joke) and thoroughly enjoyed some recliner time (along side hubby) watching the final round of the Masters. I like when it's close and you just cheer for everyone. It's more enjoyable when you don't know until that last putt who is going to win the green jacket.

I talked to my mom tonight and that put me in a good mood, too. Of course, I forgot to tell her the church jokes, which she would have loved. So I'll have to call her back this week. It was her turn to crack me up, though not intentionally. She somehow managed to work "hoodlums" and "hooligans" into one conversation! I just chuckled to myself.

We gotta start resurrecting some of these words and phrases. Young people – even those loud hooligans – need to know what's really funny.

In my o-pun-ion.

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Runaway Nun Running at the Mouth


This year marks the 500th anniversary of Martin Luther's famous 95 Theses, which helped spark the founding of the Reformation and the division of Christianity. Legend has it that on Oct. 31, 1517, Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the door of the church in Wittenberg, Germany, the town where he was based.

Although last Sunday was actually Reformation Sunday, our church had confirmation so we waited until today to have a special 500th anniversary observance. Instead of a regular church service, we watched the movie Luther (2003, starring Ralph Fiennes), had a potluck brunch, and welcomed two visitors to First English Lutheran – Martin Luther and his wife, Katie.

For real.

Awhile back, our pastor's husband – the coordinator of the event – asked if I'd do some research on Katie Von Bora Luther and present it as part of the celebration. Oh, and dress the part. How can I turn that down? I agreed only if I could do "Robyn style."

Katie Luther was a very interesting woman. Found a lot of different sources of info and culled it together in a monologue / screen play of sorts, with a touch of entertainment and hopefully humor. I found / created the costume thanks to the school music department, which had a few old things laying around from previous madrigal performances.

My only hope this morning was that I would not get into an accident driving to church dressed like this! Thankfully, God watched over me! And I had a great time greeting people and doing the "performance." I was not nervous at all. I just had a lot of fun with it.

"Martin" did his part before the movie played and I did mine during the potluck intermission. So whether you want to read it or not, here it is. And it is about 98 percent factual, 2 percent creative license.

Straight from the mouth of a runaway nun... this week's star of the Real Housewives of Wittenberg... Katie Luther!

Guten morgen!
Oh, let me switch this to Midwestern English so you don’t have to read the subtitles.
Good morning!

Katherina Von Bora Luther.
That’s me. My friends call me Katie. And my Marty calls me LORD Katie. And with good reason. But we’ll get to that…

I didn’t always live in this glamorous yet ghostly monastery. Despite my long, fancy-sounding name, I came from very humble beginnings.

Although women never give their age, I will tell you I was born on January 29, 1499, and let you do the math.

My father was an impoverished nobleman. When I was 6, my mother died so father sent me to the convent school to be educated. When I was 9, I entered the convent. In 1515, when I turned 16, I took my vows and became a nun at the soonest possible date.

Two years later, the good Dr. Martin Luther nailed his 95 theses to a church door. Word spread quickly – but not to us. I was in a very, very secluded monastery under the local province of a man who was an enemy of the Reformation. In other words, no internet or cable at our place.

When we did hear about the Protestant Reform movement, a number of us grew curious first, then dissatisfied with the cloistered life. So a dozen of us conspired to flee in secrecy – a dangerous move, punishable by death.

I contacted Martin Luther via a letter, begging for his assistance, because well, he seemed kind of gutsy. And it turned out, he was.

On Easter eve in 1523, Mr Luther sent a merchant to help us escape. A man who was delivering fish in 12 barrels came in late one night to the convent, unloaded the fish and then loaded us nuns in the barrels. It wasn’t exactly a first-class operation!

But we made it to Wittenberg. The wagon rolled up and the group of us – smelling like we do not even want to think about – got off the wagon, right there on the steps of the church. Mr. Luther was there to meet us and what does he say? He says he felt so sorry for us. And here's why.

We were such a wretched little bunch and even if we washed the fish smell away, we had a problem because most girls were married at age 15 and 16. And we were well past our prime. What was going to happen to us? Martin asked parents and relations to take in the “refugees,” but most declined. Taking in escaped nuns was a crime under canon law.

We also had the option of going to a convent that was a little friendlier to the Reformation, or we could get married. Ya. 12 nuns smelling like fish and Mr Luther was expected to find us husbands!
Within two years, he was able to arrange homes, marriages, or employment for all of the runaways – except me.

Martin tried to marry me off to two suitors, but neither arrangement worked out. I had picked somebody out, but he did not want me. He said I was too feisty. Can you believe that? Then the helpful Mr Luther chose somebody for me and, frankly, I turned up my nose because he was too sanctimonious. He was holier than thou and I did not like him.

So I said to Marty, “After those two you might not make such a bad husband yourself.”

To set the record straight, I wasn’t proposing to him. But it did make him consider.

Finally, he decided it was an OK idea because, and I quote, "the marriage would please his father, rile the pope, cause the angels to laugh, and the devils to weep."
How’s that for romance?

The result was the joining of a 42-year-old former monk and a 26-year-old former nun in holy matrimony on June 13, 1525 – 8 years after the composition of the 95 theses.

And even though my girlfriends were all like “oooh, you married a doctor.” He was a doctor of theology. Not a highly-paid surgeon.

Let me tell you about marriage to the esteemed Dr Luther.

Granted I wasn’t exactly a domestic goddess at the time. I knew how to sing and pray and that was about it. But I soon realized one of us had to be in charge.

To be frank, Mr. Luther brought nothing into the marriage but some old books and smelly clothes. Oh and a roof over our heads.

Marty was living in the building that had been the Augustinian monastery at Wittenberg. It was called the “Black Cloister.” Does that not sound appealing? It sounds awful – a dark, gray, place in Germany called the “Black Cloister.” And guess what? The electors gave it to us as a wedding gift!

That’s what every new bride wants… a home called the Black Cloister with 40 rooms to clean!

It goes without saying that we started off with little financial advantage. Marty could quote the Bible frontwards and backwards and do so in several languages but he couldn’t balance a checkbook if his life depended on it!

Needless to say, I managed the family finances and freed Mr. Luther for writing, teaching, and preaching. He earned an income from the hymns and books he wrote and the sermons he preached. And I ran a small farm and sold chickens and eggs at the local market in town. So we managed to get along.

The responsibilities around the house were not light either. My dear Marty called me the "morning star of Wittenberg" – not because of my obvious good looks, but because I rose at 4 a.m. every day to get to my “to do” list. I took care of the vegetable garden, orchard, fishpond, and barnyard animals, and like a good German woman – brewed my own beer. I even butchered the hens, pigs, and cows myself. There was no time for a woman to be squeamish in the 16th century.

Or lazy.

Let’s not forget running the household, too, and eventually caring for our family and other loved ones in our full house. How did we fill 40 rooms?

Mr Luther and I were blessed with half a dozen children – not 40. In addition to our own 6 children and the 4 orphans from Marty’s sister that we raised, I had a relative living with us, and there were as many as 30 students, guests, or boarders staying in the monastery. Thankfully, many of them were paying guests.

They all came under my care. Was it overwhelming? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes. Did we still have fun? Definitely yes.

Mr Luther doted on our large family but was able to devote himself to the simpler pleasures of life, gardening, and writing music.

For recreation, we enjoyed a bowling lane of sorts in our garden, board games such as chess, and music. And we had a pet dog named Elsa – that’s spelled E.L.C.A.

One of the most legendary aspects of our home was our dinner table. And not because of my cooking. Mealtimes often included many invited guests in addition to our family including relatives, adopted children, and Martin’s students.

Some of his students compiled many of their memories from our table into a collection that has come to be known as “Table Talk”. It possibly mentions I invented the potluck. But you'll have to read it for yourself. You may be more familiar with Dr Luther’s formal correspondences like the 95 theses, or his heavy theological works like his commentary On Romans. “Table Talk” provides a glimpse into the less formal side of us and life in the Luther household.

For example, Mr Luther rarely called me Katherine, but preferred “Katie.” And he often used even more humorous titles to address me including, “the boss,” “Lady Doctor Luther,” “Lady of the Pigmarket”, and a German term similar to “ball and chain.” His most favorite name for me was “Lord Katie,” to which he added the title for himself: her “willing servant.”

So I must be off.
You have a movie to watch.
I have a list of things to do today and hopefully will get some help from my willing servant!

God bless and auf wiedersehen! 

(Copyright Robyn Austin) 
 

"Martin" and I after the fun. Our heights matched and we were very color-coordinated in the 16th-century brown, don't you think?

Will have to return the dress, apron, and scarf this week and get back to my undomestic goddess self.

Thank God my real husband has 500 years' worth of patience!

Monday, April 11, 2016

Senior Moments :: Shenanigans

Since senior class pranks are frowned upon, the senior class decided to participate in some "shenanigans" last night instead. Apparently, that is one step down from a "prank" and therefore, shouldn't get anyone in trouble.

Or something.

Not to get anyone in trouble, but these shenanigans may or may not have been in the works since Christmas. I personally did not catch wind of it until around 6 p.m. yesterday from a senior who may or may not have participated.

Snapshots of shenanigans...

The Assumption principal was greeted with this "package" this morning, which the graduating class clearly took credit for.

 
 What could be hiding under there?

 It looks like a car, but how did that get inside the school?

 
 "Are you kidding me?" he says, but laughing, not yelling.

Upon unwrapping, he finds it indeed is a car... that may or may not have been wheeled into the lobby and then jacked up and tires removed. Where are the wheels? Open the clearly marked hood and find your first clue, Mr. Klinkhammer. 

He thoroughly enjoyed a creative scavenger hunt and found all 4 wheels!


Then wanted a picture of all the seniors – not to book 'em – but because he considered it the greatest senior prank in school history!

The danger, of course, is some future senior class trying to top that and doing it in an illegal, prank style versus a shenanigan with cerebral challenges!

The kids are lucky they don't have to do a remake of The Breakfast Club, 2016 version. And they are lucky their parents may or may not be proud of their creativity!

(Photos courtesy the mother of another senior who may or may not have been involved.)



Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Modern Family

Hubby and I don't watch a ton of TV together, but when it comes to sitcoms, there's a few we both find laugh-out-loud funny. Big Bang Theory is one and new this season -- Modern Family. It is a hoot and half!

Since the family is "modern," it reflects every possible familial situation from parenting to adoption and inter-cultural marriage to domestic partnership. Pretty much any role you have in your family is portrayed in the show.

Tonight, one of the female characters was getting a chair massage at the mall and was very vocal in her appreciation of it! Hubby looks at me and I am immediately on the defensive. "What? That is not why I get a chair massage every week!"

Well partially it is. I want them to work out the knots so good that it hurts and feels good at the same time. Since I am getting this done at work, though, I try to keep my moans of pleasure (or pain) to a minimum.

Chair massages work wonders, by the way. Now when my month is up and it's time to see the chiropractor again, it doesn't feel like I have to see him or I'll die. The massages really have helped get my back in order (as good as a person can anyway).

It's also a good time to either clear my mind or do creative thinking. Today, naturally, I had scrapbook layouts on my mind. I sense I will be dreaming about them for the next 5 nights at least. But I'm not complaining!

I did not get a chance to do any packing tonight. Had to chauffeur Carter into town for confirmation, run several errands and then shuttle him over to basketball practice.

We got home with 2 minutes to spare before Modern Family started at 8. Then Jim and I had our 31 minutes of quality time. It was nice.

Now if only I could get him to watch Glee with me! OK, we may be a modern family here, but not THAT modern!

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Gimme A Break

Hubby and I love the Monday night comedy line-up on CBS. I'd have to say our favorite sit-com is Big Bang Theory.

At first you wouldn't think a show about 2 physicists would produce many laughs. But you throw in a hot blond neighbor, a geeky friend and foreigner afraid to speak when women are around, and you have a lot of funny story lines. The main character, Sheldon, takes anal retentiveness to a whole new level. I know, coming from me, that must mean a lot. He makes my sometimes "over-structured" life seem normal.

In the episode the other night, he was really stuck on some equation. Two sleepless nights' stuck. So he figured he needed to walk away from it and do something menial to occupy his mind for awhile. That worked. The answer came to him suddenly. It had been there all along.

I'm sure those of us lower on the intelligence scale than Sheldon have experienced this. Have you ever been working on a puzzle, can't find the piece, keep looking, can't find the piece. You step away from it for a bit, sit back down and it's right in front of you!

That's how this family tree project has been for me. For years I was looking at a connection between 2 families one way -- two guys being brothers -- when I never considered it could be something different -- say a brother and sister that connected the 2. It took some time away from the project and the endless Internet searches for me to see the light. That and some help from a couple of strangers who had a different angle. And information to back it up!

No, this isn't some mind-boggling scientific equation (fiction or otherwise) that can save the world. But it could open some new windows in my research. And it definitely will erase some headaches!

Sometimes we just need a break.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

The Bypass

I sort of feel like we're living in anti-snow globe today. It seems everyone around us -- north, west, even south -- got snow overnight and we got nothing. Somehow it totally bypassed us in Rapids.

And I'm OK with that.

It still was pretty darn cool -- hovering around the freezing mark when soccer kicked off at noon. We made sure Carter was dressed in layers -- but not enough that he couldn't move freely (picture Ralphie's little brother in The Christmas Story!)

Jim and I basically threw on the same clothes as yesterday. Hey, if it kept us from freezing to death one day, it should work the next!

The game started out pretty good. When we score first, we figure it's going to go our way the whole time. Not always. Carter played some good defense, stealing the ball as much as possible. He did get called on one penalty for pushing, but it's better than standing around doing nothing, right?

He claims he didn't get the ball much but that's because was goalie for awhile (didn't let anyone score on him) and on defense, too.

He still had plenty of opportunities to kick it! Unfortunately, the other team kicked it more and ended up winning 5-3.

We were cold. He was tired. But we all survived.

I figured since it wasn't snowing or raining or even cloudy here, I better go out for a run today. That felt pretty good. Glad I put a stocking cap on. The wind was/is still a bit wicked (and our naked trees can attest to that!).

Tonight, Jim and I are going to a comedy show featuring several comedians we hear on Bob & Tom on the radio each morning (The Bob and Tom Comedy All-Stars Show). We have tickets to the late show (which doesn't start until 10) so now that I've got my exercise in and even the housework done, I'm contemplating a nap.

Even if it's not a snowy day, burying myself under a warm blanket on the couch seems in order, doncha think?

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Parental Guidance

Our typical morning commute consists of little or no talking. Hubby listens to his radio show and I typically am reading, emailing or blogging. In the summer, Carter sits quietly in the backseat playing his Nintendo DS or, on rare occasions, reading.

We pretty much keep to ourselves, just easing into the day.

Thankfully Jim is the most awake (Good thing since he's the driver!) -- usually having a few laugh-out-loud moments over the Bob and Tom Show. Now the humor on that show is quite often adult-oriented. I pretty much tune it out when my mind is otherwise occupied. However, I forget we now have this impressionable young mind in the back seat.

For one fleeting moment I remembered today. Some comedian was about to share some story about Santa so I tell Jim to turn down the volume and motion to the backseat to indicate "we don't want him to learn the truth about Santa from the radio." So we wait it out for what we presume to be long enough for a story, then turn the volume back up. We timed it right and nothing was revealed to unsuspecting ears.

Whew. Dodged that bullet.

Then it hits me -- a thought, not a bullet. Why are we protecting the 11-year-old from a big fairy-tale reveal but not shielding him from the PG-13 comedy?

I guess Mommy needed a wake-up call!

I can't guarantee I'll be any more alert and coherent in the mornings, but at least enough to be mindful of our pipsqueak passenger!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Laugh Tracks

Carter gave his third and final class presentation yesterday. These presentations are based on original writing, but not necessarily original material.

For the first one (last fall), he presented the basic rules of football. The second one was a completely original story about a hobo and a spaceman (this involved those cool cardboard cutouts). For this final one, he decided to do a stand-up comedy routine of sorts.

Anyone who knows Carter knows this is right up his alley. He's always Mr. Entertainer. Always looking for a laugh. (So unlike his introverted parents.)

He found some classic jokes, new ones, even revised a few and offered "points to ponder" like why is there an expiration date on sour cream? I also downloaded a laugh track sound byte for a sound effect the teacher played occasionally during the routine.

I wasn't too concerned about how this would go. His teachers have always commented on his keen sense of humor and say Carter is quite comfortable speaking in front of the class.

Despite the fact he had to explain a few of the punchlines (like why the guy got fired at the M&M factory for throwing the W's a way), Carter said it went very well.

I'm pretty sure he's willing to do an encore, so if you're planning a summer party and looking for fresh (cheap) entertainment, just contact his agent...

Saturday, February 7, 2009

A Temporary Reprieve

Not sure what time Carter and his friend went to bed last night (since I sort of passed out) but I'm pretty sure it was after 11. So I was surprised to hear them tip-toeing downstairs at 7:10 a.m. Ugh. On a Saturday? C'mon! I reluctantly dragged my keester out of bed by 8 so I could make them some cinnamon rolls.


When I saw how nice it was outside -- one of those deceptively sunny days that make you think we should have the front door open -- I put my nose to the grindstone to get some things done. I had my last batch of Sunday School curriculum to write and I wanted it off my plate. When I say last, I mean last one after 5 years of doing this. It's time to pass the baton. And I am soooo ready! I finished it late morning and let out a whoop. One, because I was done. And two, the thermometer out back said 45 degrees!


Sometimes Mother Nature can be such a tease, giving us a nice spring-like day when we know it won't last. We are so desperate in Wisconsin, though, we take the joke and get on with our day, enjoying the temporary reprieve. I was able to get outside for a walk in the fresh air and that felt great! Didn't hurt to log a few miles, too.


After lunch, we took Carter's friend home and later took Carter over to Grandpa and Grandma Austin's. They kept him for the night so hubby and I could enjoy a date. Yup, you read that right! A date!


We met some friends over in Appleton for dinner and then went to a comedy show. The comics were hilarious! As usual, I will never remember the jokes -- and could only dream of the same delivery -- but it was entertaining as heck. I smiled so much my mouth hurt (that and the toothache!)

All in all, today was a nice reprieve from the dead (or dread) of winter. Thanks, Mother Nature. (And hubby, too!)

Monday, September 15, 2008

For Sense of Humor, Press 1

I realize there isn't a "how to" manual for parenting out there. But it must be written in some code of conduct somewhere that daddies handle the wrestling, teasing and practical jokes, and mommies always keep a steady supply of Band-Aids, warm fuzzies and morale boosters on hand. At least that's how it works in our house.

Often heard within the confines of our car or home are the words: "Not funny, Dad!"

And while hubby has resigned himself to the fact that he is not funny, he still gives humor an effort. Quite often, in fact. And sometimes, it works.

Last week was a good one. Why am I writing about last week? Well, I have been fighting the angel on my right shoulder who says "Don't blog about this or Carter will be embarrassed," while the devil on my left shoulder whispers, "Yeah, but it's funny."

Forgive me, Carter. The devil won.

I will try to keep this generic enough, however, to avoid complete humiliation.

So Carter and I have a routine set up where he calls me on football practice days when he rides the bus directly home -- just to let me know he made it home and in the house OK. Nothing major. The other day, before hanging up, he mentions something "personal" to me. Just something a boy isn't embarrassed about telling his mother or father when he knows no one else is listening.

On the way home that night, I mention this thing to Daddy, not knowing the "let's play a joke on Carter" wheels were spinning rapidly inside his head. I didn't give it another thought until after football practice when they came home and Carter was a bit miffed.... About a conversation on the way to practice that I imagine went something like this:

Daddy: Oh Carter, you really embarrassed me at work today!

Carter: How?

Daddy: Well you know how our phones have a paging system? If I can't get ahold of your mom, I just press "page" and say "Robyn Austin, dial 281. Robyn Austin, 281" and she'll hear it anywhere in the building. Well Mommy must have just paged someone when you called because the page was still on and everyone could hear your entire conversation. (This is where Daddy is really good at carrying it one step further.) So after you hung up, I'm getting all these emails from people saying, "You must be so proud!"

Carter (quite, quite, quite embarrassed): Oh I'll never be able to set foot at (our workplace) again!

After hearing this playback, I rolled my eyes and said to Carter, "C'mon. Do you really believe your dad?"

When realization dawned, he pretty much tried to tackle Daddy with a teeth-gritting "That's not funny, Dad!!!"

Jim says: "April Fools" (a bit early). And, gasp, "Miss I'll Always Protect You" Mommy was laughing, too. I guess you had to be there. But it was funny!

Since then, when Carter doesn't believe something Daddy (or evil, laughing Mommy) say to him, he just responds in his "paging" voice: "Robyn Austin, 281. Robyn Austin, 281." That's his code for saying, "You guys are full of poop." (Not that this had anything to do with that.)

Monday, June 23, 2008

Bye, George

I'm a big fan of comedy and was saddened to hear this morning that George Carlin died. I should take a cue from him and develop a list of "7 things you can't write in a blog" but I am sure I could not be as clever.

There are all kinds of stories and quotes on the Internet from George. Here is just a sampling of some the quotes spoken by one of America's hippest comedians.

When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?

When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.

Women like silent men, they think they're listening.
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your money called a broker?

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately
.
Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll go to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!
This is a little prayer dedicated to the separation of church and state. I guess if they are going to force those kids to pray in schools they might as well have a nice prayer like this: Our Father who art in heaven, and to the republic for which it stands, thy kingdom come, one nation indivisible as in heaven, give us this day as we forgive those who so proudly we hail. Crown thy good into temptation but deliver us from the twilight's last gleaming. Amen and Awomen.

Amen. Bye, George!