Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts

Friday, 25 November 2011

Closing Down the Wilderness

I have been going in to Z's school once a week to help the older students set up a blog. One of the students wanted to take a photo of his classmates in the giant tree that they look out onto through their classroom window.

Just before recess their teacher said yes they could all go outside, but they were only allowed to climb the bottom two limbs.

How has it come to this: that needs of litigators are defining our school curricula not the needs of children? It reminded me of this excerpt from Michael Chabon's Manhood for Amateurs:

What is the impact of the closing down of the Wilderness on the development of children's imaginations? This is what I worry about the most. I grew up with a freedom, a liberty that now seems breathtaking and almost impossible. Recently, my younger daughter, after the usual struggle and exhilaration, learned to ride her bicycle. Her joy at her achievement was rapidly followed by a creeping sense of puzzlement and disappointment as it became clear to both of us that there was nowhere for her to ride it—nowhere that I was willing to let her go. Should I send my children out to play?

There is a small grocery store around the corner, not over two hundred yards from our front door. Can I let her ride there alone to experience the singular pleasure of buying herself an ice cream on a hot summer day and eating it on the sidewalk, alone with her thoughts? Soon after she learned to ride, we went out together after dinner, she on her bike, with me following along at a safe distance behind. What struck me at once on that lovely summer evening, as we wandered the streets of our lovely residential neighborhood at that after-dinner hour that had once represented the peak moment, the magic hour of my own childhood, was that we didn't encounter a single other child.

Even if I do send them out, will there be anyone to play with?

Art is a form of exploration, of sailing off into the unknown alone, heading for those unmarked places on the map. If children are not permitted–not taught–to be adventurers and explorers as children, what will become of the world of adventure, of stories, of literature itself?

Monday, 23 February 2009

The Ambush

My sister Kate and her family, who live ten minutes away, were evacuated this afternoon because of fires. We decided not to take any chances and joined them at a safe house in town, where we all still are.

The kids ate icy-poles, played and watched DVDs. The adults stood on the balcony in amazement at the smoke like monster's breath, not too far away. Z's mum came to join us, her house under threat.

Inside the radio is turned to the emergency fire station, outside sirens herald the presence of brave fighters.

We are all exhausted now, the kids picking up on our angst. 

The wind wants to carry us home.

Sunday, 1 June 2008

Love = Space


This morning my loved ones left me. 

They jumped into a canoe and drifted away as I stood on the shore; PJ, Z and a friend of Z's. The adult in the middle, the boys at either end with the paddles.

There was no room for me, and I didn't want to go. But still I had the feeling of being left, while they headed out into the unknown.

We received an email yesterday from the principal of Z's school, a just and kind man. He said Z had stolen a butter knife from the kitchen and had threatened some of the other kids, and when he was asked about it, he had lied and said he didn't know where the knife was.

Both these stories are about letting go, about learning how to relinquish unnecessary anxieties, how to be OK with loved ones going out into the world over which I have no control, trusting that I have done my best as a person and a parent.

As John Cage said, "Love = space around loved one."