Hi again. It's a been a while.
As I lay in bed last night at the end of another busy day I thought about updating the blog, and then thought something like,"No rush --- no one's holding their breath waiting for our latest news." But then I thought, "If I don't write it down we won't remember these things. I need to update it." I will try to be better about keeping a record.
The past few weeks there's been a familiar change in the air. My locust tree out the front window has started to turn gold. It's a little taller than last year, like my kids (a LOT taller in Noble's case). With the change in the season this year have come a few other important changes.
Speaking of the change of the season...
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| We took a breakfast hike up Yellowfork. River loved it! (He loved it so much he got giardia from the stream he was drinking from. No kidding. He spent 2 full days the next week throwing up and having diarrhea. The vet helped got him back on track... G.I. track. Now we know that a young puppy's stomach is considerably less resilient than older dogs. Live and learn. |
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| Sully enraptured by nature. He kept yelling stuff like: "Nature is waiting! I feel the nature!! There's so much nature just waiting for us! Wow! Nature is getting so awesome!" |
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Abner with his "mustache stick"
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Big Change #1.
Four of our kids started at the new Montessori charter school near our home. Everyone has been over the moon about it. The method, the atmosphere, the new friends, the gourmet lunches...
Everyone, that is, but Tillman.
We didn't make the decision to change schools lightly. We had been involved with our old school for 10 years, but felt in the last few years that things were changing. When the option of enrolling at this Montessori school presented itself in the spring we thought a lot about it, prayed and felt right about it.
We knew it would be really different for all the kids. And we knew that Tillman is the one that has struggled the most with change in the past. When we moved to this house Tillman cried every day for weeks, and begged us to move back to our old house. Eventually he got over it.
Tillman is also a kid who likes to have every detail laid out. He wants to know exactly what to expect. So we knew it would be an adjustment for him. We just didn't understand how MUCH of an adjustment. A few days in he started to complain that it wasn't like his old school, that he didn't know the kids. (It didn't help that he and Grace and Sully had to miss the first day of school because they had strep.) Day by day he escalated the situation. He went from whining about it after school, to crying in the bathroom at school, to calling home sick, to leaving school without telling anyone and walking the 2 miles home
across Bangerter Highway.
That was a nightmare day for me. Luckily he wasn't hurt, luckily the police were not involved, luckily everyone was able to get in touch and I found him by chance before they were able to ,get a hold of me by phone (I would have freaked out). Lucky all around.
After asking him (in a very loud voice, I'll admit) what on earth had happened that would cause him to leave school like that (and hearing the same stuff: "it's different from my old school, I don't like it, I don't know the kids", etc.), I made it clear that that kind of stunt was COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE. Then I drove him back to school, had him apologize to the director and his teacher, and checked him back in for the rest of the day.
The thing with Tillman is, he has a stubborn streak sometimes, so this has been exhausting. He gets into a panic cycle and then there's no stopping him until he finds a way to reboot. He needs to change the way he thinks about it...but he is unwilling. He has let his anxiety grow beyond any reasonable response to the point of desperation. His siblings are totally confused by the whole thing. I've heard them shushing him in frustration when he starts to get anxious, afraid that he'll spoil everything for them in their new-found Shangri-la.
He insisted that if we let him switch to a classroom where he knew a couple of kids he would be fine. After a series of meetings with his long-suffering teacher, the director and the school counselor we agreed to change him to a different class (not the one he wanted), and made it clear that if he chose to switch classes he was responsible to make it work. He agreed, and chose the new classroom. At first it seemed to be the reset button he needed for his negative thought cycle. Since then it's been mostly better, but we've had a few tough days lately. So we will keep on working with him. I don't know that there's a magic approach that will make him want to change his attitude, but I sure hope he figures it out soon.
That kid. We have been learning a lot about him in the process. We are also learning a lot about agency.
That was a long story.
Big Change #2.
Jessie comes of age.
Jessie started high school, got asked to Homecoming, turned 16 and got her driver's license all in less than a month (and our auto insurance doubled). BIG changes.
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| Her friend from the neighborhood (son of Kris Kemp - for those of you who share my history) dressed up like Napoleon Dynamite, his little brother dressed up like Pedro - they pedaled over with Napoleon on the pegs to give Jessie a delicious pie and this drawing of Jessie. "There's a lot more where this came from if you'll go with me to Homecoming." And then rode away again. It was classic. |
Her 16th birthday was magic. A few days before the big day one of her friends texted me and wanted to set up a surprise birthday party. I kept her occupied that day with a pedicure (her first!), and later that night Mike and I took her to dinner at India Palace while the invited guests arrived at the house and set up for the surprise. She claims she had no idea, but I'm not so sure.
On Sunday (her actual birthday) we thought we would just have a quiet family dinner and invited the grandparents over for cake after. Didn't turn out that way. Her good friend from next door filled her bedroom with balloons while we were at church and then brought over this DELUXE Captain America (Jessie's favorite super hero) cake. W-O-W!
Earlier in the day we had been looking at old scrapbooks, and we were laughing about how when Jess was little every member of our families came to every birthday party (a consequence of being the oldest and only grandchild/niece for many years), and how that was definitely a thing of the past. When it came time for cake that evening however, along with both sets of grandparents, a steady stream of Sullivan family (all 5 of my siblings and their kids) filed through the door. They all happened to be over at Sullivan's before that and so they came to wish the birthday girl many happy returns. What fun!
Big Change #3.
Noble's big reveal.
Noble got his braces off last week. He was actually supposed to have gotten them off almost 2 weeks before that but some how we totally spaced the appointment. We have to be the first people in the history of braces to actually forget about the appointment where you get them OFF. Unprecedented.
He can't stop smiling.
Big Change #4.
Mike has a doppelganger!
Mike has River trained to sit, stay and come. Pretty good for a 10 week old. So far however, the potty training is largely unsuccessful, and he barks a lot, and has started something called puppy nipping (a normal phase where a puppy tests his place in the pack by challenging everyone). We are working with him to nip it in the bud...more nipping. ha ha ha.
But the thing is, it scares the kids - and makes me frustrated. Why did we need a dog?
At least he's cute. Both of them.
