A Hat Too Far

Kids these days, am I right?!

Today I stepped out to the vast emptiness of holiday shopping to witness the bone chilling hollowness of commercialism gone awry. Christmas doesn't make sense to me. Today's youth doesn't make sense to me. Put them both together and I'm as confused as a lobotomized kitten in a sea of warm milk.

Anywho, today I saw not one but two members of today's youth sporting 2 hats. One hat resting comfortably upon their skull where it belongs and another fastened to a belt loop as if it where an open-carry pistol. A back-up hat? For what fucking reason would you ever need a back up hat readily available on your person? In case one hat didn't look "as fly" as you originally thought and changed to the one you thought might potentially be "dope as fuck" instead? Or perhaps you encounter a cute girl and get the feeling the Chicago Cubs hat just isn't her thing. Instead you slowly reach to your side and unholster your trusty Boston Red Sox hat to turn the tide, leaving nothing to chance in your strong hat game.

As a lover of all things hats, I agree with this trend in principle. In practice, this is dumb as shit. Perhaps if I were born in the far off year of 1998 or 99 I would be a valued subscribe of this back-up hat trend. I would never leave home thinking I wore the wrong hat again. But I grew up in a time where you chose the hat you were going to wear for the day and just dealt with the consequences of that choice, for better or worse. I'm an antiquated product of my time. Sure, I'd love to live in a world where I could just change hats in a pinch, on the go, in public, in an emergency fashion crisis.

But you can't teach an old dog new tricks..............or trends.