As I was filling out a personality test and self-evaluation, I came across a question that I have addressed in this blog before. What other jobs have you considered? To name a few: writer, pilot, career military, law enforcement, rock star, etc.
What if I had some other cool job choice? A job where I wouldn't have to work as hard. Or maybe a job where it's a different type of "hard work." Such as an Elvis impersonator That's not hard, per se. I doubt it takes that much effort to dress like The King, look like The King, and adopt similar mannerisms. I think the hardest part of that job would be living up to Elvis. Think about it. That's your job. To be someone else. Kind of. That's it. That is your career. Your sole purpose in life is to follow the exact footsteps of someone' else's already successful career. Nice.
Acting would be a sweet gig if you were successful. Being "good" at acting isn't exactly a prerequisite for being successful in the field either (Bonus!). There are plenty of horrible actors who get paid obscene amounts of money to do what they do. How awesome is that? You show up on set, have a few of the snacks, make people do your bidding, have an inflated sense of importance, say a few memorized lines based on your crummy interpretation of the writer's script. What is there not to like? That's hardly work at all. I can't stand to hear actors whine about how hard it is to do all these things. Boo-fucking-hoo. "I'm overpaid and the pressure to be entertaining and good looking is too much for my rippling deltoids to handle."
Yeah. I could handle that.
I've previously mentioned writing as a prospective career in the past. I don't think I could write anything cool or noble like some of the great classical or modern writers out there. My writing would likely be low brow in nature. Not that I'm incapable of writing deep, complex or serious material. But I enjoy writing humorous material far more than anything else. A career derived of writing poorly thought out dick jokes would be the life for me. Not to mention my other low brow sub-specialties of humor that include, but are not limited to: poop jokes, sex jokes, mean jokes, tasteless jokes, offensive jokes and so forth. I try to cover the spectrum. I could do that. I wouldn't know where to begin with such a career so I haven't tried. I've also never been convinced that career choice would necessarily make me happy either. But in an alternate universe, I could see myself as being happy with that decision.
I'm all for lazy high paid work. I'm also a huge fan of obscure work that you rarely hear anyone ever take credit for. I've always entertained the thought that somewhere out there, during the Christmas party season, is a guy in a bad sweater who casually brags that he is the successful owner of a factory the manufactures dice and/or phone cords. That's it. That's the only thing his factory produces. And he owns it and runs it on a successful high paid salary. I could do that. Someone has to, right? Perhaps I could operate a factory that only produces the top hat for the Monopoly board game or maybe a factory that produces silver handles for a Swedish kitchen apparel company. The options are limitless on what kind of factory I could own and operate for inoccuous and under-appreciated objects.
That's right, I'm back to wasting your time with all the energy I can muster. You missed it, didn't you?
Sure you did.
Happy October.
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