someday

I am back from camp. Haahaa... It was a goooooooood one. And praise God for that! =)

Oh well, due to the slow-like-snail internet connection, I shall blog about some camp stuff someday. Someday...

Pictures? Someday ya....

some noise

It has been a long time since I typed something here. =)

All thanks to the slow connection in my hometown. It really dampens my mood to blog. I don't even have the mood to feed my fluff cowe. Oh poor MooLoo.....

Oh yeah.. I am off for PKV T.H.E. Camp tomorrow. Yay!

Potential

Alright, I just came back 2 hours ago from a fantastic outing with my roomie at KLCC and Sungei Wang. We went for this exhibition at Galeri Petronas. I felt that it is a good exhibition, featuring artworks by Malaysian women artists. Go here and find out more. The paintings, the photography, the creativity and the hard work they have put in... those artworks really gave me a 'wow' effect when I looked at them.

This picture shows some of the artworks in exhibition. I like that 4th artwork from the left. She used charcoal to draw and there are different layers overlapping each other to create a kind of effect. I don't know what effect people called that but it's very nice. Well, I could not imagine how much time they spent doing and how much effort they have put in to come out with such beautiful works. Beautiful and thought provoking, I would say. =)

Some quotes I saw in the exhibition...

In the relationship between art and society, it follows that if the nature of social, political, economic and cultural landscape changes, then art's identity and its potential changes too. While focusing on the recent memoirs as Malaysian women, this new generation of artists examines and responds to the transitional conditions and paradigm shift that in its description relates to the multi-faceted Malaysia domain.

The importance of these artists lies not only in the representation of the sheer complexity of their artworks - but more importantly their art conjures fields of visual experience outside any rigid boundaries of media - though irreducible from the processes and terms of contemporary art practices.

They examine the flouting of boundaries of place and persona, bringing together the various Malaysian psychological cultures and reconfiguring them to experience the complex hybrid nature of Malaysian society.

I somehow felt that this exhibition meant something more than just artworks. These are artworks coming from the women's perspectives about life, about the society and etc, voices which are often unheard of and are being regarded as not of utmost important, not very logical, subjective and so on so forth. There is one by Nur Hanim Khairuddin, entitled 'Tudung', it gives you one kind of scary feelings. But it is actually trying to portray that kind of struggles where truths are being masked. A state of voicelessness. I guess it's something like what I learned about Muted group theory. Aha.

Hmm, to quote from what my roomie said... it goes something like this..

"Potential is a very scary thing.
You look at a piece of wood, you can say that the piece of wood has a potential to be a table.

The potential of an object(or a situation, a person and etc) depends
on another being that defines it(him/her).

It's something like how we are created.
God sees the potential in us from the very beginning.
HE defines who we are......"

Indeed, only God knows the potential we have in ourselves. We may not see it. But HE knows us through and through -- how much we can do, how far we can go, how much we can bear and handle... What a comfort to know that HE knows me, HE knows my potential! And He will make me(a piece of cute wood) into a (cute)table which serves HIS purpose for my life.

Dreams

I found this in PostSecret this morning. It says, "Dreams. Please don't let me forget everything. I don't want to forget."

And later in the afternoon, someone threw me a question. "So, what is your dream? You know, dreams as in ambitions, goals and etc."

How to answer this type of questions? Enlighten me, will you? What kind of dreams are we referring to? Personal dreams? Selfish dreams? Erm, 'holy' dreams? Childhood dreams? Well, I guess the questions will be much easier to answer if it's worded like this...

"What are your childhood dreams yeah?"

Then, people will start giving you all sorts of standard textbook answers. Just ask a young boy or a young girl who is still schooling and see for yourself. Doctor. Nurse. Lawyer. Teacher. Policeman. Soldier. Air stewardess. Well, those choices may be socially constructed and are gender-biased. I am skipping that point(again). Whatever it may be, you will get a list of standard answers because that's what the adults are telling the kids nowadays(oh, not really nowadays. It has been like that all this while) directly and indirectly. I am not saying that it is wrong. But the main point behind all these is.. To be successful, you have to dream big. The bigger the better. The higher you go the better! People have been telling me this. Has anyone told you this before? Don't tell me 'No', k?

When you get older, you may start wondering..

"What on earth am I here for?"

"Is my dream(s) really that important in comparison to what God has for me and what He has called me to?"

Well, and not to leave this out. We start to dream for our family. Our country. I don't need to say much about this. I felt that sometimes and at certain situations, dreams for the family and dreams for the country are kind of like going against each other, esp when things are not going well in the country(don't tell me this is an understatement, please), and when the dreams you have for your country is nowhere near realization. I wonder if you could understand what I am trying to say here. Well, never mind. Anyway...

For the sake of your family, will you choose to leave the country for a better life?

Or will you continue to stay, believing that God is going to provide and take care of you and your family as you try to do your part in making the dreams you have for your country come through?

It's not easy. It is never meant to be easy. Some of us are very angry with things that are going on in the society, I know. But what are we going to do? Continue to lament and complain? I don't know what I can do with all the Education and Gender theories, Biology, Mathematics, and a bit of knowledge on Social Sciences which I have learned through the 2 and a half years of university life. But I just pray and hope that I can really put them into practice even though I may not fully believe in some of those theories. Making a change in school when I go out later? Walk the talk? It all starts with me. My heart. Let not the words I speak and teach be at odd with what I feel in my heart and the way I live my life.

***

Wait. Just Wait.
The greatest dream is perfected in the loving hand of God. A deliberate, expectant pause is all the invitation God needs to encourage us on... or check our spirits, preventing us from making the worst of mistakes. So take a deep breath, listen expectantly, and step out with boldness!

I wait.
Dear Lord, Thy ways
Are past finding out,
Thy love too high.
O hold me still
Beneath Thy shadow.
It is enough that Thou
Lift up the light
Of Thy countenance.
I wait --
Because I am commanded
So to do. My mind
Is filled with wonderings.
My soul asks "Why?"
But then the quiet word,
"Wait thou only
Upon God."
And so, not even for the light
To show a step ahead,
But for Thee, dear Lord,
I wait.
-Elisabeth Elliot-

taken from Bright Hope for Your Future, Heidi S. Hess

Well. What is(are) your dream(s) then?

I wanna show you this...

Okies. This is the BerryBlueBeaniePlant I blogged about yesterday. Oh was it yesterday? It seems like ages ago. Mind you, I am having exam now and it makes me go nuts. Oh well, I can't show you how BerryBlue looked like when it was healthy. All I have are pictures of it dying. Oh, not 'dying' but 'already dead'.

Did you see that? The roots poked through the gel! I am amazed. These roots looked so weak and yet they managed to poke through the gel, holding it together with the soil. The gel didn't even fall even though I was only holding the stem to take the pic.

Oh by the way, the word on the bean was this...

Faith

Mind our English? Or Manglish, perhaps?

Hmm.. the transcript and video clip on the interview between our Minister of Information with Al-Jazeera is pretty a big hit now eh. Just go google or whatever lar, you will be able to get the transcript and the video. Haha. I am trying not to laugh at him or/and his English. Abuthen... Ah..

Another thing worth talking about during your free time with family and friends (if you cared enough)... UM has dropped out of Top 200 in the world. All Malaysian universities are out. Dei sei? Padan muka? Serve you right? Erm.. Whatever lar~ We are always good in giving excuses. Never mind lar~

Something caught my eyes. Oh boy, sometimes I wonder what happens in the Parliament besides all the sparks and fires and verbal hadouken and etc. Missing MPs. Why lar like that wei? What are you for if you are not there to represent those who voted for you, to be the voice for your people wei?

I don know lor...

whatever lar~

d' weather

Hmm, the weather now is something like this. At the other side of the sky, the sun painted it light orange. Another rainy evening. And here I am laboring for my last two papers. I can't wait for the exams to be over. Tomorrow 5 pm. Yupz, that's it, man, I tell you.

My BerryBlueBeaniePlant is dead. Confirm. Just when I was happily celebrating the little leaves, oh boy, later in the day the leaves bent down and I know the plant is dying. Oh well. The plant served its purpose. I used it to study for my plant structures and functions. And I learned a lesson from this experience of growing a bean.

A precious lesson about tender loving care. The other one is this...

the LORD gives and takes away

It was the first thing that struck me when I saw the plant that was already half dead by then. How I mourned over its 'first death' and how I celebrated its 'resurrection' when I saw new leaves sprouting out a few days after that! I thought the plant is gonna make it to a bigger plant. Go, BerryBlue! I thought it will grow strong and healthy.I thought...

I just couldn't stop thinking about this...

the LORD gives and takes away

I guess that's what life is all about. Life and death. Some survived. Some didn't. Literally and metaphorically. We all live by the grace of God. HE knows what HE is doing.

social discriminations?

I came across this post. I am thinking the same thing. How many others out there are also being oppressed, exploited, and etc?

I saw Dr. Irene Fernandez' (Executive Director of Tenaganita) picture when I was browsing thru' some blogs which blogged about 10-Eleven Bersih rally. The picture of her brought me back to the sessions I went through during the 2 weeks of Social Work Exposure and Embracement Program(SWEEP), esp the one on Social Discriminations by Dr. Irene Fernandez. I remembered how she speaks with passion and hope, how she committed her life fighting for a cause she believes in, and the ups and downs she has to go through. It's truly encouraging to listen to such people sharing their life experiences and at the same time, challenges us to make a difference from where we are. One thing she said and it stayed with me.

If everyone is made in the image of God.

why social discriminations?

d' heart

Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.
Prov 4:23

ABOVE ALL ELSE, guard your heart! A strong message on how our heart directs our thoughts and actions, how it defines who we are. Questions to a self-conduct heart check-- What do you fill your heart with? Where is your heart?

A heart of flesh versus a heart of stone.

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;
I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.
And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees
and be careful to keep my laws.
Eze 36:26-27

Jesus sees my heart. And all that is within it. The good and the bad.

A broken and contrite heart,
O God, You will not despise.
Ps 51:17

I woke up one morning wondering what is ahead of me. It's scary, you know. And later on, I came across this verse...

When I said, "My foot is slipping,"
Your love, O LORD, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
Your consolation brought joy to my soul.
Ps 94:18-19

and I know HE will never leave me nor forsake me.

Tak Nak?

I was wondering how effective the Tak Nak! campaign has been. Well, the government dumped a lot of money into this anti-smoking campaign to educate the nation about this, you see. It's just some thoughts which came across my mind over the past few days hanging out with friends. If smoking is really so so so bad.. why would people want to smoke?

"Girls shouldn't smoke," they said.

"She is so pretty and she looks good. But once I saw her smoking.. aww.. all my good impressions on her is gone," she said(he said).

"Eh, that fella is a Christian, right? Why la is he/she smoking?", someone said.

I have been thinking why smoking gives people such a negative impression. A sign of rebellion? Being defiant? Cool? Sexy? Equality between the 2 sexes? Argh, whatever. And a lady who smokes 'suffers' more comments from other people compared to a man who smokes. *Oh well, here comes some gender theories. I shall not dwell in it*.

Perhaps we are being a bit too judgmental about people who smoke. Aren't we?

Under construction....