<body>
FLIMSTRIP
of love, in words of mine.

bold italic underline link

PHOTOGRAPHS .


Profile- just glance through
Entries- my flimstrip of love
Links- i'm hanging on
Archives- alley of history
Miscellaneous- out of this world


unspoken .





jukebox .


MusicPlaylist
MySpace Music Playlist at MixPod.com




credits .

Designer: X X X
Image: X
Style: X
Hosts: X X X
Font: X



WELCOME
to my flimstrip, his-evolution.blogspot.com.

bold italic underline link


Friday, June 29, 2007
12:16 PM

The late nights took their toll and i fell asleep almost immediately the moment i hit the bed. Sighs. Supposed to go online after slacking for a while but i didn't.

Yesterday was a mixture of good and bad. Physics paper 3 was a killer. Didn't get to study AC and it CAME OUT. Dangs man. Al said it was pretty easy. Nvm la. Hahahah. Paper 3s are meant to SLAY. Waited in the library and chatted for a while but guess the mood wasn't there because of the crappy physics paper. Headed for lunch then TRANSFORMERS at amkhub. The movie was much, much better than i expected. The effects were cool and plot was simple yet intriguing! AUTOBOTS are hilarious lols. And picture a robot being slain by fire extimguishers la. BRUTAL. Hahs. Kept being reminded of the BLACKDOG i used to have. *sheds tear* LOLS.

Slacked at subway and saw al's mum. Crapped with her and then headed to orchard. Walked here and there and saw the bag which ky was interested in. It was ______. Lols. Hahas. Later on, she lost something which can never be found. So true. The general mood was downcast and remained that way for sometime. Hoped the dinner helped. We saw two transformers. One transformed into a CRAB and the other into a LOBSTER. JK!

Saw the girls off to their bus stop before heading off. Had some impromptu guys talk and MAN. ITWASGOOD. Again, it's been quite some time since we really talked like that for so long. Gonna have more of these gay talks at the right times. Hahs.

drawn


Wednesday, June 27, 2007
2:53 PM

ONEMOREWEEK to LIBERATION!

3 papers down. It's physicspaper3 tmr and i've studied 5 chapters till now. KNS. Gotta brace myself for yet another late night. Just a little bit more...

Yesterday was horrendous. Too easily distracted and slacked waayyy more than i should have. Ended up with a brain at 2am. Had some hunger pangs in the middle of the night and had to make do with some crackers. Crammed more content into the super shagged brain before school started. Managed to pon assembly for 2 days already. Gonna make it 3 tmr.

I didn't manage to finish studying chapter 6 on some MACRO crap. Prayed and prayed and prayed and my prayers were answered. To date, this is my smoooothest paper. I probably screwed the rest lols. Case studies were okay but lousy time management skills la. Smiled the moment i saw the essay questions (:

Lunch-ed at macs with gaypartner again. Frequency tuning and the girls laughed till they were as red as baked lobsters lols.

Damn sleepy now. Gonna take a shower then a nap.

progression


Tuesday, June 26, 2007
2:05 PM

Done with chempaper3 today.

Dangs! Not really a difficult paper. Such a waste that i didn't finish studying everything. Skimmed through some really important chapters in the morning and ponned assembly. It PAIDOFF. Hahas. I was praying for tonnes of organic chem to come out, like 4/5 questions? But they only came as parts of 3 questions. WTH la! At least i think things went OKAY, taking into consideration that i studied about 14/20+ chapters. I've been slacking WAAYY too much.

Enough of whining lols. Lunch-ed at the usual coffeeshop with gaypartner after that. KY and HC came out of nowhere. Lols. We were like stunned for a moment.

Speaking at the right time is IMPORTANT. Hahah.

stand


Monday, June 25, 2007
1:41 PM

ONE down, SIX to go.

Only managed to embrace the tender comfort of the bed after 3am. Sighs. That's what you get for last minute revision. Didn't really screw up this paper. Neither did i do as well as i've wanted. Ohwell.

Yesterday, i had to rush out 12 chapters. Today, it's more than double according to al. I'm really dead. Guess i've been taking things too easily lols. Played and slacked around too much.

candid


Sunday, June 24, 2007
3:00 PM

Just dropping by for a quickie.

It's maths tmr and i'm barely halfway through. Things are about to change though. Lols. Hahahs. Everything is pretty understandable, just don't have the time to finish studying. I'll aim for honour roll during the prelims if there is one then. For now, i wanna scrape through this and enjoy the few days of holidays with FRIENDS. Hahs.

Lunch was alright, i guess. Feeling kinda full now after rushing home from clarke quay. Saw some guys from youth on the way home. LOL. They had a nice way of saying HI with their fingers lols. Gonna mug already and BURN the midnight oil if i have to. Hahas.

Thanks for the NICE words (:

contentment


Thursday, June 21, 2007
11:27 AM

Burned an hour or more away thinking before sleeping yesterday. Man, it was WEIRD. So many thoughts dangled from where i left off in the past and i revisited them. Occasionally paying attention to the lyrics coming from the mp3 kinda made it easier. Lols. Seems like i've left out more and more stuff but again, i think it's clearer. Just have to get my perspectives in place again. OHWELL.

I hope it's just over suspicion on my part but after the lock-in, i think something is coming back to me DAMMIT. So much for the early morning "sharing" session that day lols.

Now the fatone and mom has gone to catch surf's up and i get the house to myself. Not a bad time for meditation. Hmms.

Starting today, these two weeks will probably stress the shit out of most but gratification is not out of reach.

ALLTHEBEST to all taking the mids! :D


Wednesday, June 20, 2007
9:28 AM

(: Well, that's what probability is for. HA.

Won't continue any further or i'll grow to be more like what it denies.

Sighs. Trip to the doc made it look more serious. Hahahs. Wanted to recover in time to enjoy the lunch on sunday. Dangs! Looks like i'll have to refrain from getting a recurrence of it in future or the consequences would be BAD. Lols.

If 3 comes out, i'll get it!

lovingit


Tuesday, June 19, 2007
10:31 AM

Woke up feeling slightly better so i decided to go out with the youth if mum allowed. Surprisingly, she did. Left for orchard after lunch. Chocx was late as usual. Instead of there being the pathetic 3 which hongz told me, 6 came altogether, excluding me.

The show was good. Duration was JUSTNICE and the plot was engaging enough too. Lols. Stan Lee also appeared in one of the scenes. I think this movie was better than the first fantastic 4 movie la! The swapping of powers was pretty intriguing too.

Hung out with them for a while before i really felt sick and left first. Hahas. Guess a sick person shouldn't be roaming around in town so much.

(: GOODNEWS! There probably won't be anymore hypocritical barkings and rantings if words are to be trusted. Though there's a high chance that it'll turn out to be another SHAM, it's better than nothing.

When we say nothing, it aint because we're in the wrong. It's because you're just too pathetic to notice all the glaring contradictions in the things you say.

trust


Sunday, June 17, 2007
10:10 PM

Woke up feeling real bad but i today's a special day. Didn't really have anything much in store for my dad, just a simple dim sum lunch @ marine parade. Headed to jeffrey's house to settle some stuff before going for lunch.

It was wrong but i was extremely temperamental, pissed off and impatient today. Walking here and there and even shopping at parkway parade was NUTS. I was practically dragging myself around. The only thing was that we bought shirts and yeah. Caught a glimpse of PERFECTION and BLISS in the shopping centre.

I pissed mum off. My head wasn't really clear at that time so i just took a quick shower and headed to bed. Sleeping didn't help much. Still felt awful. The CONSOLATION was, while others had a guardian angel, i had a guardian ALIEN. YEAH. Though it doesn't seem significant to ya, it really made me feel much better. THANKSAGAIN!

Not sure if things are gonna remain like this but i HATE feeling sick. Fever, headaches, swelling tonsils and aching joints don't seem like good signs. I should be considerate and maybe impose a quarantine on myself lols.

Loads of work awaiting me.

tenderness


Saturday, June 16, 2007
10:55 AM

I was pondering on 2 issues before coming home. First was something that only occurred to me during the lock-in and the second was something that i thought about eaarrrly this morning.

Before i start on the lock-in, i'm gonna briefly summarise the events that happened prior to the BIG night. So i ended up mugging ALONE in school since 7am in the morning. After all that buzz in school, headed to church with lunch. TAKEAWAYS. Helped wherever i could and yeah. The cold war with pat finally ended yesterday. Things seemed pretty cool. Received a call from KY and went to fetch them.

NIGHTMARE. That's the word to describe them in my room. Man. They ransacked, messed-up and tore my room apart! Man. I really gotta admit that these 2 aliens were more than a handful. Alien 3 finally came and they left. They managed to catch a glimpse of some personal stuff but yeah. Hahha. DISCRETION!

Saw them to the bus stop and headed straight back to church. Nothing much except for slacking till the worship and sermon. The worship had loads of new songs and just tried to follow whenever i could. Sermon was alright, just a little draggy. BBQ-ed food was low in supply, thanks to the small lil BBQ pit we had. Ate our fill later on.

Bag Game with new features added! Crap. Forgot all the strategies and yeah. But it was still FUN! Night catching followed, where the whole church was made as dark as possible. It was 1 plus by that time. Ran like crazy children and hid at some new places. It pretty much rocked too. WELLDONE banglas!

Took our turns to shower and had some super late night supper with the leftovers. Played some card game while waiting and it was something new. Had an update session with hongz later on, as promised and man! We talked, on and on and on. It was pretty good listening and telling EVERYTHING (: Most of us couldn't get to sleep so cas, stewart, chocx, his stead, hongz and me went below to listen to talk. Dangs! A supposed ghost story session kept getting cut here and there. Headed back up by 6 and when i felt guilty for not making my word count(yeah, sorry man!). 4 of us crammed on a little sofa and tried to get some sleep.

At the end, the lock-in this time was a great success and i'll upload the pics as soon as i receive them. Carrying on from the start, the first issue was resolved after coming online but the second issue remains to be seen.

sweet!


Friday, June 15, 2007
12:19 PM

Slacking in the com lab after mugging for like 5 hours. Shit! The efficiency just aint there. Man. I only managed to complete the beginning 2 chapters for econs and my brains were already soaked sponges. DANGS!

Gonna have some food in a while's time. Tragic life, ALONE. Lols. Enough of self pity. Youth lock-in tonight!! Hope it would be fun and won't be just another time-waster. Most of the guys in youth are attached and probably gonna need some private space. Guess it's just the fish and me gaying today. sigh.

axiom?


Thursday, June 14, 2007
1:04 AM

FATONE just returned from his npcc camp. Man. I normally won't hear myself speaking/mentioning anything good about him 'cos that's the way our brotherhood works. Today, it suddenly dawned on me that perhaps having this lil bro wasn't as much of a curse as i used to think.

3 days of experiencing life as an only child made me realise how monotonous it could get. Maybe all the little squabbles, arguments and fights we had aren't that bad after all. The house suddenly became unnaturally quiet and time just crawled. Hahahs... For all his flaws, i probably wouldn't want anyone else as my bro.

BACKTOLIFE! Finally got down to serious studying and i completed yet another tutorial which leaves me with... 5 more?!? LOLS. And i guess revision was pretty slow moving. Gotta speed things up!

It's been a pretty busy day getting people to come for the youth lock-in on fri. Not much success but let's just wait and see.

AL's caught the EMOBUG! Don't think too hard but rather take things as they come. I'm just an sms/phonecall away so yeah. Free advice/consultation/couselling from an ex-debater. Don't feel shy/paiseh to come forward yeah?

INNATE


Wednesday, June 13, 2007
12:03 AM

Never had a day like this for as long as i can remember. CONTENTED with the world and myself. Those who know me might have heard me talking about my purpose in life- nothing. Well, i guess i have a new purpose in life- to be contented.

Sounds dumb and unambitious but it makes quite a lot of sense. At the end of the day, working so hard and slogging your guts out for whatever reasons is a journey towards contentment. HAHS!

For the first time during this holidays, i actually woke up at 12pm. Man! But at least it was worth it. Spent the time thinking and thinking and thinking. SOMETHING came out of it. Hahas. No more worries about it, at least for the time being. Caught the ch55 drama about the armed escorts which i missed ytd and tried to clear up the mess in my room before studying. Time flew and the sky darkened as i cleared and organised my notes. Left with the stack of maths before mum told me to clear out some old clothes and before i knew it, it was time for dinner with dad.

We were early so we did a bit of window shopping at raffles city. Headed to raffleshotel as it neared 7pm. Man. The place we went to was POSH. Felt pretty out of place la! Bar & Billiard Room sounded kinda wrong for a place which serves such food. The seafood buffet was impressive man! Lobsters, crabs, salmon sashimi, oysters and what-have-yous greeted us aw we entered. I thought that it was a waste for me to go since crabs and lobsters weren't really my cup of tea but the other food there just MADEMYDAY. Ate till my jeans almost constricted me like some python. Hahaha.

That's not all. Had some guy-to-guy talk with my dad. Never talked to him like i did before. I didn't know why but in the past, we were like somewhat distant. At least i think the chat today is a good beginning to some father-son bonding. Spoke about studies, GIRLS, the family and of course rubbish! Hahahah.

Everything about today that i didn't mention(or purposely left out :)) still rocked! Somehow, i have a good feelnig about things from now on. YEAH.

SETINSTONE


Tuesday, June 12, 2007
1:15 AM

OKAYS. Today wasn't productive as i planned but at least it wasn't wasted.

Met al for lunch and i was late, as usual. I should really change this bad habit man. Headed to 455 after that and this marks the first time we've ever come back to school and studied together. Aint bad and there were the occasional guys talk. Got the waffles with EXTRA chocolate after working my MAGIC. Lols! Mugged with alien and chun before heading out for dinner.

Victimised by the all-girls throughout and fought back in 460. Trees, washing machines and the like have all suddenly become so ominous.

In short, it wasn't a wasted trip to school today.

GOAHEAD


Sunday, June 10, 2007
3:00 PM

"You should think about coming back to church on sundays, Jonathan. The adults are missing you and asking for you. You can ask ____ if you don't believe." Dangs. Uncle John's words never fail to try to bring me back to the right track. Feeling guilty about the choice to leave sunday church service for good again. But at least i'm not wasting it away. FAMILYTIME.

Mum woke me at 1030 and we all went out for the usual breakfast-cum-lunch. Headed to AUDIOHOUSE after that. The fat one actually bought the same mp3 that hudinator bought. Dangs! The purchase of that mp3 came along with a promotion that allowed us to guess the first digit of the 4-d on 20/6. If the number really comes out then mum agreed to get that for me too. Lols. Extravagance.

And have i mentioned that i'm big time screwed? 6 tutorials left to complete and 4 subjects to revise within 2 weeks. Not as bad as BT and there's still time to change things.

Gonna SLAY some tutorials now.

(:


1:32 AM

Wasted today away. Hardly did any tutorials. Have to sit down and rush a few more tutorials tmr or i'll have a repeat of the BT. Gonna make a list of the topics for all the subjects soon.

Joshua/fish called me at 2plus and said that the soccer tournament was on already. Decided to give it a miss to blog hop and slack a bit more at home. Headed to church and watched how things went. Man. So many new faces and they played well too. Hahahs. Didn't really blend or fit in with the people taking part so i headed for the parish hall revise before i saw the hudinator. Had some guys talk and he actually bought a new samsung mp4! Rich ass. Lols.

Played some floorball and table tennis after that. Floorball was okay. WON joshua's left hand. Lols. It wasn't easy but yeah. Good training today. Time to train how to receive spin balls soon.

Dinner was alright and headed to rk to get ripped. Haven been here for some time already. It was nice hanging out with the youth again. Crapped quite a bit and planned for the youth lock-in. They asked us to call our friends along and join in the fun.

Things on the whole were pretty good for today. Hope things can stay like this or improve.


Thursday, June 07, 2007
11:33 PM

It wasn't the way i pictured it to be. Maybe i'm thinking too much in the wrong direction. Maybe it's self-deception but not that it makes much of a difference. There was something in the chat with wj that really made me come to realise something. I overlooked the importance of one really really trivial point.

Dad gave me a lift to CMPB in the morning. Had to drag the fat one up with me 'cos he had some npcc stuff on in the morning too. The guys who were going for the checkup were mainly jc students. I felt kinda shitty wearing my house tee when all i saw were shirts from vj, sa and ac. Well, most of them seemed pretty stuck up so i didn't really bother going to make friends with any of them.

The whole process was efficient. Not really something i expected but somewhat FUN. Started off with a photoshoot wearing the office uniform. Not bad but the photographer kept asking me to tilt my head into position that i felt like a total idiot who cannot distinguish turn and tilt. Dammit. Next up was the medical station. Here, we had to collect our piss in some small plastic container and put a colour coded paper into it. Nothing much but yeah. Pretty cool. Got pricked on my right middle finger for a blood check and i thought it was the end of all the unexpected bleeding. Who knew that a container which collects 2/3 of a small test tube of blood awaited everyone. i was like WTH la! That medic dude who collected my blood sample was like going "Are you (still) with me?" repeatedly la. Lol! Dental was alright. X rays were fun, esp the body one. Had to press our chests against some machine. Lol. I was damned stunned to see Shaun sir. He actually helped me to do the ECG or whatever. He seems more sane now. Worst part of the day was the m18 part. Shit man. Had to stand naked in front of the doc. Man. It was WEIRD. Pes A.

Did some work in school with some chatting sessions in between. I'm lucky. Headed for Pan Pac after meeting them. Though i forced the thoughts away, they kept coming back. Shit. I HATE to think so much. She only opened up after we got to marina and was pretty hilarious with her misgivings about SOME places. Snuck up to the upper floors on Pan Pac with the beautiful night view of the city.

Thought alot on the way back. This incessant thinking has gotta stop. But because of it, something from the past came back to nudge me. "Your expections of a relationship and your partner changes over time. What you may like now may not be something you'll look forward to in future". It's a mistake.

gone


Wednesday, June 06, 2007
5:07 PM

"To scale a mountain, start by taking the first step."

I hope it applies for everything. Things are looking better. Through this, i've learnt. I apologize for the hurt i've caused. Didn't know that things were actually like this. Perhaps this might be a blessing in disguise. This has opened up another avenue for us to deepen our levels of understanding. No more wading in shallow pools of uncertainties.

Thanks to all who've spent time being middlemen/peace-makers/consultants/listening ears. Man. I'm glad that you all have entered my life and it probably won't be the same again.

:)

With regards to SOMETHING ELSE, i think the previous move made was a bad one. There's bound to be a backlash and things might get ugly. The mistake was commited last year. I know i'm supposed to be neutral but looking at it, i can't help being drawn to the other side. Only months to go before this year comes to an end. Let's just live it out happily and peacefully. No point in trying to disrupt the status quo now right?

Gonna go for my health checkup(and maybe anal probe :P) tmr morning at CMPB. I just can't wait. Imagine waking up early in the morning just to go to some ulu part of the island for some health assessment. At least it's gonna be productive 'cos i'm going to school to rush out more work and buy some studying guides. But hey. You can drop by and even say hi :)

This part is a little irrelevant but chanced upon it while blog surfing. That blogger is coincidentally an 89 baby too. Check this out.
- "It is difficult to love an Aquarian. You have to be prepared for the unexpected. I am an Aquarian. A very Aquarius Aquarian. Emotional, eccentric and unpredictable."


Tuesday, June 05, 2007
11:06 PM

I'm tired. Guess everyone is. Did so much thinking but hardly any actually went towards my work or revision.

Supposed to play maple now but the mood aint even there. Strangely enough, there seems to be no urge to do anything at all.

It's sad that i really don't have an idea of where i'm headed this time but yeah. Maybe saying something but not saying anything like a friend's blog helps.

Finally got to watch POC. Made do with some sleep before heading to j8 for some food. The movie was long but engaging. At least i could follow the story enough to understand what was going on. Walked down and up the mall just to find a shop selling laksa. It wasn't all that bad after adding lumps of chilli to it.

My mind and body was restless even though i was in school. The chat with al made my day but sadly, it didn't last. Sorry for the implications(yes, you. i know you know but thanks for not letting me know).

why?


Monday, June 04, 2007
10:53 PM

Today breezed by. Not really sure what went wrong but something DID go wrong.

Rained like hell on the way to amk mrt. Both me and al were like drenched on the mrt. Headed to suntec on time but lin was nowhere to be found. Decided to go to raffles city for some maintainance. Walked to suntec with al alone and had some guys talk and updates. So much has happened within such a short time but yeah. We will get out of it stronger somehow.

The popcorn making tutorial and lecture on projecting movies seemed more of a formality. Movie was pretty good even though the fat one said that it was boring. There were some cheesy jokes in between and the movie quality was pretty impressive.

Some things happened after that. Won't go into the details now but yeah. Choice of words really alter moods. Some can hurt too. Realised that PPM wouldn't be sufficient so lin and me headed to 711 and got some drinks. Slacked at esplanade and had a long long talk. Wrong choice of drink. Should have chosen lin's drink with cooling agent instead.

lostforwords


Sunday, June 03, 2007
4:33 PM

HEY. SMARTPERSON! If you're reading this, you'll probably know who you are. Since one of the problems stemmed from the very words on this blog, i've decided to do some corrective work and do some housekeeping on things between us.

After thinking through, i guess i have to shoulder part of the blame for the way things have become. But it aint as bad as you potrayed it to be man. Far from APOCALYPSE. I said things which i SHOULD have, WRONGLY. C'mon, friends tell you what you WANT to know. true friends tell you what you NEED to know. Even though you hate to hear it, SORRYSORRYSORRY!

Besides that, is there really a difference between friends/______friends/______friends/______friends? Everything is just a title or a name. The main focus should be FRIENDS. What's more, it's just as you've said. Minor issues that accumulated to one big issue. It hasn't reached the irreversible stage yet man.

Suspects are given the right to a fair trial in court to defend themselves. Don't i get something equivalent, if not more?

And even if proven guilty, there's the YELLOWRIBBONproject. Everyone deserves a second chance. So yeah. I hope this puts things in perspective, somehow.


Saturday, June 02, 2007
12:14 AM

I'm feeling good as i write this post. Or maybe not as good as i would have liked it to be. Ohwell.

Today marks yet another end- the closing chapter of SPA in my entire life. I doubt i'll ever be doing such experiments or planning them again but amazingly, it's been great and unforgettable. From the lamentations of screwing up certain experiments to the queasy feeling of anticipating experiments, i'll be missing every single BIT of it.

Used to dread SKILL A for the insanely unrealistic expectations of students but in the blink of an eye, it's OVER.

A wave of relief after SPA but somehow, it didn't feel really good stepping out of the hall. The wondersofcommunication.

Lunch wasn't that bad and ended up chatting hours away in the kopitiam with my "generals" thanks to the rain. Caught SLEEPERS again at the library and we had an illegal immigrant who really BRAVED THE ODDS to come join us. TOUCHED. Lols...

Doing work wasn't that unproductive and dinner was pretty GOOD. Shopped for lemons and went for some BESTFRIENDS FUN at the club. Man. It seems to have become a routine everytime we eat at chomps. BESTFRIEND was sporting as usual and jing improved her capacity. Lin displays GREAT potential. Hahah.

BESTFRIENDS