projs, assignments and deadlines..

i hate these 3 i mean who like them.. well maybe some ppl do..

well my deadlines are coming up soon.. i have one due this coming monday which i need to start tml.. i need to prepare the research lit and also prepare powerpoint slides for the oral presentation.. i have one due 10 july.. which i'm also gonna start abit tml.. wah sian lea.. the othert 2 grp projects i havent started at all and not know what to do.. we need to meet up soon..

ok tml i shld be try to apply for a surveyor job which according to han the pay is good.. hopefully he's right and it wont be that difficult..

i plan to complete all my theory for drving by the end of july and start my practical in aug..hopefully i can pass the first time my driving test..haha.. oh wells.. i shall go continue doing my work or watch a movie now.. ciao..




i'll be waiting for you..
hope it won't be in vain..

chalet..

went to mantiz chalet 20 - 22 june.. not as much ppl as i expected but oh wells it was still fun.. overall had fun la.. centis came over.. played games watch movies talk cock.. it was good..

had a talk with someone during the chalet to settle some problems we had and we kinda did settle it. so yea feeling much better.. i'm glad that she told me the problem.. if not i wont get it.. yea..

so back to sch on fri.. havent seen my frens.. kinda miss them.. oh wells..off to cook dinner now..

useless.. (this is gonna be a damn ugly post so read it at ur own will..)

i cant take it anymore..

i'm fucking useless.. i cant even make some one smile or be happy..i even think i bore her out most of the times.. i feel so god damn useless.. the only time when i can make her happy when she's out with me is when i call her frens out together with us.. the only time it seems that i can get her out is when her frens are coming.. and it seems like when she spends time alone with he its her last resort.. even a simple chalet i cant get her to stay.. not even for the sake of the guy she's dating.. i had to even not invite another grp of frens so that if she called her frens down they wont feel left out.. i mean have u ever think abt how i might feel..? i feel so unappreciated.. and when ever u say lets call some one else or when u looked so depressed with me and u tell me u're tired but when some one comes along u are suddenly not tred.. i feel hurt and useless.. or when u wont go out with me cause its only me.. it just breaks my heart to hear that.. i get this feeling that she doesnt even like me anymore.. i feel like its we are very rocky right now.. am i expecting too much or putting in too little.. cant i just get a nice simple relationship.. why must all the girls i fall in love with have some motherfuckers some where screwing her life up.. i mean just leave her alone for goodness sake.. and i seem to be falling for girls who cant seem to hurt anyone.. like cant even bear to scold some one even though that someone is giving her a hell lot of problems..i mean if the person is screwing ur life up fuck the person up.. slap the person too if it helps.. what ever to get ur point across.. i think i'm destined to stay single for the rest of my life.. fucking hate my love life.. fucking hate my life for that matter..

my studies is fucked up.. everything is so god damn difficult..financially i'm fucked too.. no cash for anything.. everything is in a mess.. esp my love life..nothing is going well.. fuck life..

some one just shoot me in the head.. fuck everything..

if you read this,

i'm really sorry to hurt u by this post

but i just needed to let it out some way b4 i explode

hope you'll forgive me and we'll work something out

i don't wanna lose you like this

but what ever it is i'll respect ur decision

i truely am sorry..

ouch..

well ltos of bad shit happened to me the last week.. well it was the end of last week.. friday onwards..

friday:-
went down to beacons to tell maricel that i wanna work on sunday full shift la.. den at the same time met nic and a few frens for a cycle down to esplanade for dinner.. it was 9 plus 10.. haha.. so we were cycling and cycling fast.. and just b4 big splash toilet the four of us were cycling quite close together.. i saw nic speed up so i sped up to catch him and had to squeeze between micky and when i did my handle bar hooked his and den i swerved to the left den right den i flew forward.. u actually see ur crash happening in slow motion damn cool but thats beside the point.. so i crashed oh my right and skidded across the flow tumbled once and ended up on my back whihc was kinda funny..sore wrist.. cuts and road rash but lucky that was abt it.. so not that bad still can cycle abit.. oh got my bike back up and the handle bar was twisted to the left.. haha.. so went to nic's hose to tend to my injuries..

saturday:-
was grocery shopping with nic and his mum.. bought lots and lots of stuff.. one trolley full.. was outside the bag shop infront of giant at pp when the jokers pushed the trolley into me.. he tot i would hit me in the butt but i was walking and it rammed right into the back of my ankle and kinda sprained it slightly..

sunday:-
well i accidentally swang my arm up and hit my forearm into the aluminium roofing sheet and yet cut and bruise myself now the wound hurts like mad and i cant carry heavy stuff on both hands.. hah.. and now both ankles, heels and toes hurt cause i was working in my cycling shoes.. had no choice.. yea..

so basically this have been a physically painful weekend for me.. but its kinda exciting..puts some spice into my not so painful life..haha..

cant wait for tuesday's chalet..

life in skool..

well i wake up at 11 everyway when i have school in the afternoon of not 645 if its in the morn..

when i wake up i'll use the com for abt say awhile till abt 1145 where i'll cook or buy lunch.. i'll den change and leave the house latest by 1245.. i'll be on the train latest 1315 and head to sch.. i'll either stone or slp on the train cause i have no mp3 player so if u guys can kindly donate to the "get gp a 4gb ipod nano with laser engravings" funds it would be good..

sit in class listen and take nots and talk to my frens.. if we get bored we get rowdy and make lots of noise.. we would laugh alot at time and just go crazy too.. 1515 would roughly be break time and it would be 20 mins.. sometimes it is at 1540..

after break get back to class till 5 den take the train back home and have dinner.. might go out sometimes for drinks but thats abt it.. yea..

thats my life in skool..

3rd wk..

well today is the start of the third week of school. so the only thing i can blog about this is that i just came home from nicholas's house. went cycling and then over to get my bike fix.

well the previous week not many things happened. went to school as usual, went to brewerkz with my classmates, saturday went to discuss on our project and then yesterday went to turf club for some patron's bowl thingy. my uncle invited my family and my relatives over. good thing is that i was able to buy a new blazer and pants cause of the event and i can use it. boy do i love dressing up like that cause it makes me feel good and "high class"? yea sadly din win anything there but oh wells it was for fun anyway.

so basically i'm about to go to bed soon cause i'm feeling really tired so till when i got more motivation to blog. ciao.