The battle day

The battle day. 24th October 2016

Every lady has their own story of the battle day. I agree if they said it was the unforgetful one..

I had regular contraction pain since past 4 days before the delivery. Since this is my first experience feeling how the contraction was, i went for check up quite multiple times (anxious sangat!), my cervix was already soft and thin but the os still around1-2cm. Dr Y asked to go back first and come back again on 23rd for induction due to prolonged latent phase if still not delivered.

Mama asked not for early induction since the contraction pain is still mild and there was no show or leaking yet. So yea, i decided to go for check up n induction on 24th.

The battle started at 2am on 24th oct. I started having regular contraction pain in every 5 mins. Yes, for the whole night i cannot sleep. I was ready to go to the hospital by 6am. After breakfast with hot milo cream crackers and kurma, Z brought me to the hospital (wisma perbidanan dan sakit puan - currently known as puteri ayu medical centre )
the pain was increasing in intensity. I started to sweat. Fuh. The contraction was up to 100 from the CTG. Yea, it was a real pain! This kind of contraction i even can push my baby out without the pitocin. It was real. It was real. Phew. But but but another thing made me worry was baby's heart rate. I assume my baby's baseline heart rate is normal on tachy side - around 160 like that. (Cause baseline heart rate from CTG previously was about the same) but thennnnnn, suddenly CTG showed regular deep deceleration. Fuh. That is not right :(

Dr Y came after 1 hour like that. 'Okay nasyitah, the cervix soft but the os still around 2-3cm, we proceed with ARM ok..'

And then. 'Nasyitah! Thick meconium stained laaaa' sweat sweat sweat. Cause i know what she is going to say after that.

*thick meconium stained liqour (tmsl) means the baby already poo poo inside the womb*

Ok, prepare for caeser now!

Yes. The word. I never expect for caeser. Never. Antenatally uneventful. Estimated baby size okay 2.9-3kg. Latest AFI sangat adequate 13. Baby's movement more than 10 kicks in 2 hours. Kicking here and there like nobody business. And my due is on 25th! I still got one more before the due! And nowww my baby is distress inside. 😣

First came up in my mind was the complication with tmsl. Comes the chest xray of pneumothorax. Comes the direct suction NRP. Comes the branula and blood taking. Comes the ventilation. Comes the cynosed limp baby who not respond with the stimulation. Allah. So much possibilities. Tears. Tears. Tears.

Dr called up Z to come inside. And she showed him the liqour. He was stumbled. I saw his worried face. He looked at me. I know. He was trying to be strong. For us. He keep saying everything is going to be alright. But i know from his eyes, he was broken inside. Seeing the worst situation that we never expect on the battle day. On our battle day.

Emergency lower segment caesarean section

The steps for caeser running in my mind. Ok on OT table. Ok then bend your body forward. Ok then spinal. Ok then drape. Ok then start. Start the incision.

It took about 15mins for Dr Y to bring M out. She even has to use forcep cause the liqour was very scanty. The anaes tried to calm me down. (I was shaking throughout the operation)

And. The baby came out. Yes i know. But i cannot hear the crying sound. Allah. Suddenly Dr Y screaming, suction! Suction! Suction now! After few mins, my baby M cried. And for the first time, i love the crying sound. Alhamdulillah. It was a relief to hear that cause it means baby M is breathing well..

Welcome to the world my baby. Tears.

Alhamdulillah. Everything went well. Dr Y came and telling baby M is doing well. No grunting. No oxygen needed. No desaturation. Sucking well. Not started on antibiotics since he was stable.

Alhamdulillah.
No other word that i can say.

Alhamdulillah. Allah protects every minute of my battle day.
The right timing. The right action. The right decision.

Alhamdulillah.

Baby M is my strong baby boy. Since during pregnancy, he can bare with my hectic schedule, inadequate sleep and rest, the 'vibration' when i was running here and there to prepare caeser, ready for resus. And now, he was struggling to bring the life. To bring the happiness to us. Mummy loves you so much baby M.

Smile.

Mommy

Mommy

So, here is the comeback post since 2014. (HAHAHAHAHA HAMAIGADDDD) well, i come here as a mommy-to-be. walawehh. Since today is my off day and im so lazy to study for my assessment, why not i cuci a bit my beloved blog weee :)

okeh lets update current status. i am now a 33 weeker pregnant lady. A wifey to Z for 2 years ( a girlfriend to Z for 6 years kehkehkeh ). Anak manja to Cikgu N dan arwah Mejar J for 26 years. A kuli houseman to HSAH for 1year and 6 months.

Nervous. yes that is a forever feeling for a mommy-to-be. Pagi petang siang malam fikir mcm mana la ada anak nanti. But i really sure when this little nugget comes, that will be the best feeling ever in my life :)

Seeing sick / ill baby everyday in ward, distracting my emotion. Because, i fully understand when a doctor says he wanna check your baby's blood for SBV/ jaundice (they need to bend your baby's hand or foot for proper position to find a nice vein ), for any infection in blood / blood culture ( they need to push your baby's hand to get enough sample ), trying to save your baby's life as much as they could ( they need to push a mask on your baby face for a proper CPAP, they may injure your baby's throat while doing intubation or for regular suction )

Yes. All these i fully understand how it goes and what i need to expect. And i know Z too. Every week, he counts my gestational age and i can see a bit relief from him. Now my baby's estimated weight is about 1.8kg.. atleast, i can remove a possibility for an incubator for this little nugget.

Stay strong little nugget. Mommy does feel guilty for sometimes not giving an enough rest for you. But mommy so proud that you gives an impression of normal pregnancy presently for mommy. Cant wait to see you soon.

Be healthy.

 Loves, mommy.

#mommytobe

Kiddos

First day paediatric posting. Feel sooo enthusiastic. 😜 yey i love kids so much. So we decided to attend our night posting lol!  (Instead of going and take the sign only)

Got HSP case fresh from oven bebeh! And we play with the kiddos till 1030pm. Hilang semua rasa lapar dan semua semua perasaan yg ada. Haha. So, here is the picture budak kecik main dgn ktorg td.

Dan skrg lapar amat. Dan bantal berputar putat di sekeliling kepala. 

Oh. In life, there are more pretties and wonderful things you must discover. Give them chances to entertain your heart.  eventually the heart will know how to deeply appreciate the meaning of 'God loves you more'

Goodnight people :)  

Hallo ha!

Weehooo!

Assalamualaikum orang kampung!

Lama beno tak update. Last post was in 2011! And alhamdulillah sudah 2014 nasyitah masih di sini! Tarapapapa!! 

Inshaallah will update more soon. Will do inshaallah :) 

This photo was take a few days ago when i was in kedah. With my beloved iman kayyis. Will story mory later! 

pH iman?

:: bila ketika kepala cakap berhenti! =__="

study leave. fuhhh. fasa mneguji IMAN.

tahu tahu perlu letak pergantungan yg satu hanya pada kebolehan kuasa Allah dlm setiap urusan dunia. tapi, hanya tahu?? yakin ke idok??
bila yakin itu tak disemai, mula lah muka ketat dan perangai pelik terzahir pada diri.. dan ketika itu, alam menjadi gelap gelita dan bloopp blooppp lemas dalam perasaan semata. weehhuuu.
dan itu. ukur iman. pada takat didih atau takat beku? :D

dan tiba tiba ada suara *takut takut result. kalau tak lepas?? :'(
haa, ini bila mana ada diri cuba menyibuk nyibuk pikir kerja Allah...
padahal cukup ke usaha disiplin kesungguhan awak tu nasyitah? T___T itu kan Allah nilai... dan itu, sijil TERBAIK yang manakah akan kamu beri pada DIA?
dush dush. tumbuk muka sendiri. jangan kerana study kejar dunia, hubungan dgn Allah jadi COMPLICATED.

okey sudah. berjihad mari. :)

talking tom.

betul. manusia itu hanya pandai berkata kata. sedangkan dgn kata kata yg tanpa hati padanya, hanya dusta. dan. termasuk kah kita dlm golongan org yg berdusta pada Tuhannya?

:: ya Allah. ampun. silence is the best communication between me and You, ya Rabb :) love much. astaghfirullahalazim.

::ode to my family::

macam biasa. exam menjelma. limbic system pun start longgar. perlukan skru. tolong.

dulu. ada mekanik. tapi skrg mungkin tidak perlu mekanik. sudah. sbb. cinderella pun bole putar skru okey.

dalam keadaan keserabutan kemelampauan yg tak sepatutnya terjadi. any stimulus walaupun tak sampai treshold level. bole buat depolarization. tapi. kita perlu cari sodium inhibitor cepat cepat. elakkan arhytmia ye.

dan. Allah always knows the best. :)

call abah. abah tiba tiba bertukar my bestfriend. serious wey. dan air mata mula bercucuran bagai air terjun. dan. im inspired by you. :)

siapa kata cinderella tak bole berangan nak jadi mcm saidatina Aisyah. siapa kata nasyitah akan kalah dgn bidadari syurga. dan pasti. nasyitah tak perlu berusaha untuk jadi bidadari dunia. kerana. pencalonan itu dari mata Dia.

bebye la wey!