A visitor from the future

"You mean the raising of children is the responsibility of those who engender them? Regardless of their aptitude or experience?"

"Stupid time traveler! It's selfies and pictures of food what should shock you about this age! Do I need to explain everything to you?"

Costume party

"What do you mean, I'm not in theme? I came as a time traveler."

Backwards

Churchill

"What the—?"

"Listen to me, Winston. I have come back in time to bring you a warning. Certain people will request an audience today. You must not grant it. They will call themselves anti-fascists, but in actuality they are fascists of the future trying to erase you from history."

Paradox

"The issue poses questions that can't be solved using conventional logic. For instance: what if someone went back in time and prevented himself from ever being born?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well?"

"Time travel is abortive."

"I see. We'll issue a press release condemning it as soon as possible."

Warning

"I am yourself from the future! I'm here to warn you: don't bother to travel back in time to give you warnings. You won't listen."

Loop

"Ah! What the...? Who—?"

"I am yourself from half a minute into the future!

"Quick! Go back in time thirty seconds and give yourself this time machine, along with these instructions I'm giving you. It's very important! If you fail, this will have never happened!"

"Eh... Ok."

"And one more thing."

"Yes?"

POW

"Why was that?"

"That was for what you're about to do to me! YOU BEAST!"

The return

It happens that the chronopod is a very dangerous technology.

"In this new attempt to use the chronopod in defense of the values of the faith, the mistakes of those who came before us will not be repeated. We will do what should have been done in the first place. We'll bring too our time the most important person to have ever lived!"

"Hallelujah!"

"Praise Him!"

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven.

"Go, sell everything you have and give it to the poor, and you will have a treasure in heaven."

"Father, forgive them, they don't know what they're doing."

The saint

(Children, don't learn your history from cartoons. No, people back then weren't executed over such simple stupidities. They were executed over much more complex, sophisticated stupidities.)

"After a long deliberation, it has been decided to use the chronopod to bring Sir Thomas More to the present. We are certain that the example set by the Church martyr and saint will strengthen the faith in these times of secularism and blasphemy."

"The Holy Bible must be in Latin! HERETICS!"

Theory

But... It's just a theory!

Montbard, France. 18th century...

"My long years studying the natural world have led me to the inescapable conclusion that living forms were created in the beginning of time as we see them today—"

"Ah!"

"What...? Who are you?"

"I'm TIME TRAVELING CHARLES DARWIN!"

"Time? What do you—?"

"Monsieur de Buffon, I urge you to put forward these ideas in the Natural History you are writing!"

"Change in species? Common ancestry between man and ape? I can't write this. It's preposterous and blasphemous!"

"You will! Or else I'll go back in time and prevent you from ever being born!

"No one must know that I single-handedly made up the whole idea of evolution in a bid to destroy Western civilization! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

"Next stop: Baghdad, ninth century!"

"... and that explains all those texts about evolution before Darwin you just mentioned. Now can you prove that never happened? Ha! I didn't think so."