Waiting

Waiting, the gaps between activities and purpose, the blank spots in my life spent on a train, on a bus, on a bed looking at the ceiling fan unable to sleep. There's just too much time to think while you're waiting especially at night when there's no activity or light to keep you distracted, just you and your thoughts in the darkness. It's torture as your mind wanders unconsciously to the portions of the brain you'd rather leave alone. Memories of home, of food, of romantic regrets, of things that could have been, of failures that you wish you could mend. And you scream for sleep, just so your mind can be at peace, just so you can get through the night without thinking, without having your thoughts prod your soul with a hot iron poker.