Parker is doing well. He reacts very well to the baby, is SO sweet to him and always wants to help. I’m sure it helps a lot to have Spencer and I home so that we can give him the attention that he needs. Yesterday we went to the zoo- just he and I. It was so good to be with Parker. I missed him so much when I was in the hospital and the feelings I have right now with him are surprising to me, very very emotional. Yesterday I put him down for his nap. I read him a story and then we sang a song just like we always do. He let me hold him as we sang “Pearly shells”- his favorite these days. I finished one verse and then got so choked up I couldnt sing despite Parkers urgings-"sing mommy!" Here I was holding my little boy- who suddenly was not my little boy anymore. He was my big boy. And SO big. Next to Ben he is MASSIVE. It's a realization that time is past, that he is growing. We will never have moments alone up at the garden or playing trucks on the floor. Not like before. He is the big brother and there is this part of being a mom that you have to let go of him as your little boy and let this other little baby replace him. Not that he is being replaced, but in a way he really is- he is no longer my baby. How I will look back with so much love and fondness on all our days together, just me and him- playing in the sandbox and running around doing stuff for foothill, going to the zoo, visiting grandma and going to the park. Doing projects at home, having him tug on my leg and ask me to play, sitting on my lap at the computer and watching him grow from a tiny little infant to this big boy who talks and sings and has his own definite personality and is no longer the baby. Gone so fast. All those cliché things you hear about and now I am experiencing them and just like they said it would- it makes me cry. How thankful I am for the time we had to be together. And our little family of four will do well. I’m excited.Saturday, October 18, 2008
My Big Boy
Parker is doing well. He reacts very well to the baby, is SO sweet to him and always wants to help. I’m sure it helps a lot to have Spencer and I home so that we can give him the attention that he needs. Yesterday we went to the zoo- just he and I. It was so good to be with Parker. I missed him so much when I was in the hospital and the feelings I have right now with him are surprising to me, very very emotional. Yesterday I put him down for his nap. I read him a story and then we sang a song just like we always do. He let me hold him as we sang “Pearly shells”- his favorite these days. I finished one verse and then got so choked up I couldnt sing despite Parkers urgings-"sing mommy!" Here I was holding my little boy- who suddenly was not my little boy anymore. He was my big boy. And SO big. Next to Ben he is MASSIVE. It's a realization that time is past, that he is growing. We will never have moments alone up at the garden or playing trucks on the floor. Not like before. He is the big brother and there is this part of being a mom that you have to let go of him as your little boy and let this other little baby replace him. Not that he is being replaced, but in a way he really is- he is no longer my baby. How I will look back with so much love and fondness on all our days together, just me and him- playing in the sandbox and running around doing stuff for foothill, going to the zoo, visiting grandma and going to the park. Doing projects at home, having him tug on my leg and ask me to play, sitting on my lap at the computer and watching him grow from a tiny little infant to this big boy who talks and sings and has his own definite personality and is no longer the baby. Gone so fast. All those cliché things you hear about and now I am experiencing them and just like they said it would- it makes me cry. How thankful I am for the time we had to be together. And our little family of four will do well. I’m excited.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Those are really special memories Erin. Thank you for sharing. I remember going through that the week before William was born and just crying at night as I would put Brynn to bed. It takes a little adjusting and then you won't know what it is like to just have one!
Your story is so crazy how you were in Lava and all - I am happy you made it home to the hospital!
so true. it's such a big change. we're excited we get these few extra weeks to see Ben before we leave (that is of course the real reason he was born early j/k)
I am so excited for you. I can't believe how much hair your little guy has! He is absolutely beautiful. Parker is quite the little man too. Good luck and keep enjoying.
I am so glad to hear other moms have the same feelings I do. You just want to stop time and not let them grow up anymore. The hardest thing with the newborn thus far for me is that I feel sooooo guilty that I can't spend that extra time with the boys. Just feeding alone takes a big chunk of the day. I have cried many times too. I am so happy for your new little guy!
Post a Comment