RIP Rick Barber, and La Bataille d'Orthez

I haven't been an active historical boardgamer in over a decade. Closer to 15 years probably. But despite having gotten rid of dozens and dozens of games, I still have 2 or 3 bookcases full of board wargames in the basement. Someday, maybe...

Anyway, I stop by the Clash of Arms company website every now and then to see if there is anything new going on with them. It's not a regularly maintained website, and there generally isn't anything much to see, but Ed Wimble is a good guy and a friend, and some of my favorite games of all time are the "La Bataille" series of tactical Napoleonic wargames. They even published my only game design, La Bataille d'Orthez, back in...idk...when I had brownish blonde hair. It was that long ago.

La Bataille d'Orthez box

The maps for Orthez were some of the last hand-drawn maps done by artist and cartographer Rick Barber as he transitioned (or considered transitioning) to digital maps.

A small section (NW) of the Orthez 2-sheet map

In the news section of the Clash of Arms website, there was a note from back in May 2021 that Rick Barber had died suddenly at the age of 66. This hit me harder than I suppose it should have, or might have. In a number of ways. Having worked directly with Rick, it was hard to comprehend that he was gone...

Rick was a talented artist and cartographer, and his hand drawn maps, counters and cover art defined the Clash of Arms style in the company's formative years. Rick lived near the Gettysburg battlefield, and the Civil War (and maps) were his true passion. But his work defined the look of the La Bataille games, even into the digital age where Terry Leeds (who did the Orthez counters and supplemental artwork) and others mimicked his style in digital format. And that is not a criticism of Terry or anyone else. It is a celebration of the foundation that Rick put in place.

Not that working with Rick as a first time designer was easy. I spent a significant amount of time researching and creating the maps for Orthez, and delivered those maps of mine to Rick. A while later, I got a set of proof maps back from Rick that...weren't what I sent him. Specifically in the northeastern quadrant of the map area, he added a lot of terrain that I hadn't put on my draft maps. Woods. Swampy stream valleys. His rationale: it feels right and looks better. OK. We'll go with that; I had zero game designs to my credit, so who was I to argue. Not much of the fighting occurred in that area anyway.

There is one last thing that makes me chuckle. Rick and I agreed that we would put low-tech copyright protection into the maps. I added a named location to the map that simply doesn't exist. He did likewise. For any of the 2,500 people out there that own a copy of the first and only print run of Orthez, my elder daughter's name is Julia, and Rick operated under the name Black Cat Studios. Take a look at the maps and you will be able to find our copyright protection. If anybody else ever made an Orthez map with either of these names...

OK, there are technically a maximum of 2,494 people that own Orthez, since I have 6 copies. Although one of these final production boxes has all of my draft hand-drawn counters and maps instead of production components, so maybe there are 2,495.   :-)

La Bataille games, and a bunch of Orthez copies

Orthez is NOT a well known Napoleonic battle, although it is very interesting in its own right (if Napoleonics in secondary theaters of operation is your thing). This was mostly what made it interesting to me to design a game around, and the fact that qualitatively, this was probably the best army that Wellington ever commanded, certainly moreso than his famous Anglo-Allied army at Waterloo.

Not terribly long after Orthez was published in 2000, another game product with Orthez in it showed up on the market from a prestigious designer, complete with my fictional location referenced on their map. Uncredited. Tsk tsk. If I had lawyers, they would contact your lawyers. But I don't. And in 2021 I'm still alive and you aren't, so... I guess I win.

But I digress.

Rick was passionate about his art, and the mark he left on wargaming in general, and Clash of Arms in specific, will endure. His art, hand-drawn, hearkens back to a bygone era in wargaming. This should be celebrated. And is by me, at least. I won't ever be able to look at that shelf pictured above, at my game, or at any Clash of Arms games, and not think of you, Rick.

I find it hard to believe that my interactions with Rick occurred 22 years ago, but the calendar is cruel and doesn't lie.

Anytime I see a black cat I will remember you. RIP Rick.

A Melancholy Return to Springfield

As noted earlier, Garnet Valley traveled to Springfield for a Central League football game Friday night, which Garnet Valley won 49-6 to improve to 9-0.

But this isn't about that...

New SHS, north end

As a Garnet Valley band parent, we sat in the visitors' bleachers. I am told that we were the first event for which the visitors' bleachers were open. Which was kinda cool...

New SHS, south end

They were very nice bleachers, looking out across the new SHS football stadium and home stands to the new high school building beyond, which is an amazing-looking modern building.

Which is where the surreal part begins.

In addition to being a GVHS parent, I am SHS class of 1984, younger brother to another SHS graduate.

Our Springfield High School was a building that used to exist on the plot of ground that is now an empty muddy hole behind the visitors' bleachers; cordoned off as a dangerous construction zone.

Build the new school on the old athletic fields. When done, knock the old school down and make new athletic fields. Makes perfect sense. The old high school was built in the 1950's, and would certainly have gotten to the point where trying to renovate it would have become impractical.

But that doesn't make it easier to accept the fact that they have knocked down my SHS, and left a muddy hole in the ground. Even the muddy hole will soon be gone, replaced by an expanse of flat grassy athletic fields.

The new facilities look great from the outside; sleek and modern. And there is a nice alleyway called Cougar Alley (?) between the home stadium stands and the new school building that includes a bunch of bronze plaques honoring past Springfield honorees in the areas of sports, the arts and teachers/administration.

It was...bittersweet...to read these plaques and recognize that I knew some of these people. Braden Montgomery, a favorite AP English teacher of mine who died too young. Tim McFadden class of 1982 who I was in trumpet section with and went on to play trumpet professionally. Teachers and students in band, orchestra, chorus, theater, the sciences, and on and on.

The names of teachers and administrators come flooding back (mostly high school, but some E T Richardson Middle School). Earl Knorr (principal). Luca Del Negro (band and orchestra). Richard Miller Jr (my middle school band director) and Richard Miller Sr (my first trumpet teacher). Dennis Bartow (biology). Joe Zumpano (physics and Moody Blues fan!). Helen Sebold (math and Scott's Hi-Q). Peg Lamb (Scott's Hi-Q and the best English teacher I never actually had for classes). Braden Montgomery. Mr Zappacosta. And others too numerous to mention. But...the ones I have mentioned played a huge role in my high school years...

And the friends and classmates... It was a long time ago. But not so long if you concentrate hard enough.

I'm not quite sure where this ramble is going, but it is nice that the travel trip to this particular football game stirred up so many memories.

And also bittersweet to accept the fact that these memories are tied to a physical place that is gone forever.

I suppose that this kind of thing is where the phrase "gone but not forgotten" comes from.

Indeed. Gone but not forgotten.

Wasted on the Way

I've become increasingly aware in recent years that certain things resonate very differently as you get older. In a good way, I think...

Search YouTube for Crosby Stills and Nash, Wasted on the Way. Good stuff.

--

Look around me
I can see my life before me
Running rings around the way
It used to be
I am older now
I have more than what I wanted
But I wish that I had started
Long before I did

And there's so much time to make up
Everywhere you turn
Time we have wasted on the way
So much water moving
Underneath the bridge
Let the water come and carry us away

Oh when you were young
Did you question all the answers
Did you envy all the dancers
Who had all the nerve
Look round you know
You must go for what you wanted
Look at all my friends who did and got what they deserved

And there's so much time to make up
Everywhere you turn
Time we have wasted on the way
So much water moving
Underneath the bridge
Let the water come and carry us away
And there's so much love to make up
Everywhere you turn
Love we have wasted on the way
So much water moving
Underneath the bridge
Let the water come and carry us away
Let the water come and carry us away

--

Amen

Makes me more glad that I got to see Graham Nash live in a very small venue every time I think about it...

This video, and others like it, make several undeniable points. First, CSN is a group where the whole is greater than the sum of the individual parts. Second, Stephen Stills is an underrated treasure. Third, if you try to isolate David Crosby's vocal part anchoring the melodic middle between Nash's top end and Stills' gruff lower end, you can begin to understand why the band was willing to try to accommodate his bulls#$t for so many years.

On that sidetrack, this video of a Byrds reunion in 1990 has more of David Crosby's fantastic backing vocals on Turn Turn Turn. And then a mile-high mess with Bob Dylan, but I digress.......

Anyway, there is wisdom in these lyrics...

Art versus the Internet

As I fumble through the baby steps of my painting journey, I frequently stumble across the difference between what my heart tells me, and what the internet tells me is "correct".

The picture below is of an original oil painting. It is a 13.5" by 18" oil painting on canvas, by Filipino artist Andres Cristobal Cruz, dated 1968. It is a view across the verdant foliage of the Philippines, past some settlements in the distance, and on to the hills and mountains beyond.

Andres Cristobal Cruz, 1968

In person, it is a wonderfully colorful and vibrant painting, evocative of the scene it is intended to represent, and just all-around mesmerizing.

In the past couple of years, I have watched an awful lot of YouTube videos on art theory and instruction, technique, composition and every other conceivable aspect of painting. It's overwhelming at times, and thus under the conventional wisdom approach to this painting I would note the following:

• Rule of thirds is followed vertically, in general, with the sky being the top third and the land being the bottom two thirds. Rule of thirds on the horizontal plane is not followed at all.
• Composition is flawed, since the bright yellowy-orange patch in the middle of the painting draws the eye to almost the exact center of the canvas.
• Another compositional visual focus is the orangey-red-brown strip along the bottom edge of the painting. This draws the eye to the extreme edge of the painting, which is not what you want. You are always told to draw the eye inward to a specific point, and not outward, and thus potentially off the edge of the canvas.
• Atmospheric perspective would demand that the distance is rendered in lighter/duller washed-out colors. The blues and greens in the distance are just as vibrant as the foreground.
• Color harmony is important. Rich and vibrant viridian blue-greens don't mix easily with dull reddish olive greens, and so on.

So... Is this modest little painting good or not?

The internet art-advice conventional wisdom on learning to paint would probably say "not so much".

I've seen it in person. I know better. It breaks conventional wisdom rules, and it is magnificent.

But I'm biased, so what do I know...

All that being said, it reinforces the point that it is important to remember to stay true to what you want to paint, enjoy the process, and leave it to others to tell you whether what you have painted is good or bad. And then perhaps more importantly, pay absolutely no attention to what they say. As long as painting gives you joy.

Mid-August Update

Lots of stuff going on these days, and not much time to keep the blog up to date. That being said...a quick mid-August update. For those few who stumble upon it...

For our first out-of-the-house vacation in two years, we spent a Monday to Friday at the Windrift in Avalon, NJ, a place we have been to a half dozen or so times in the past. The kids liked the beach and the pool. I liked that it was cooler and more overcast than usual.

Avalon NJ beach at evening

Two weeks of band camp commence this coming Monday, and with Grace being a Drum Major, I am very much looking forward to Grace's senior year in high school. And dreading it at the same time. My baby girl is on the verge of going to college... Sigh. But I am jumping ahead.

As far as painting goes, after six weeks or so of lethargy, I have begun painting again. This feels good. The following are all first-pass works in progress, with more layers to come once the first layers dry. Be kind...they are works in process. Also, I am still struggling with the "too good" camera issue, but I am too lazy to put much time into figuring it out...

A lake through the trees. 8 by 10 stretched canvas in oils. [in process]

Lake through the trees (8 by 10)

A stream through the fields. 9 by 12 canvas panel. [in process]

Stream through the fields (9 by 12)

Sunset behind the trees. 5 by 7 "postcard" canvas panel. Painted as a practice exercise limiting myself to a 5 minute sketch. These quick exercises don't always produce the best results, but are valuable in terms of trying to focus on colors, forms and overall impression.

Sunset behind the trees (5 by 7 "postcard" in 5 minutes)

Maybe I will add some commentary on the cluster-f%&$ that is the US peoples' response to Covid. Or maybe not. Suffice to say, working in healthcare, I find myself shaking my head many times each day when reflecting on the situation we continue to face. We have effective vaccines and many people not willing to take them. So we all continue to suffer. And likely will for some time. I selfishly hope that none of this prevents Grace from having a somewhat normal senior year, but.... Let's hope for the best.

An April Update

It's been over a month since I have posted something, which is very rare in these pandemic days... Which, as usual, isn't to say that things haven't been busy.

Family - In the intervening month I got my second Pfizer shot. Julia got her first and second Pfizer shots. Grace got her first and second Pfizer shots (the last just 2 days ago). Amp was fully vaccinated long ago for her job. We believe in science. And in 2 weeks, we will be as vaccinated a family as we can be (two weeks post-Pfizer). To those who believe that these vaccinations are a way for the government to microchip you.......if the government had that capability, they've already chipped you...so just get the shots please.

Grace is nearing the end of her junior year, and nearing taking her driving test. A big milestone. Applications for band leadership positions have been submitted for next year, her senior year, and having been a Field Major this year, she has applied for Drum Major next year. Fingers crossed. These milestones come too fast these days.

Art - I haven't painted anything in a "fine art" sense since I last posted something here, but I have been painting, just of the Dungeons and Dragons figure variety. I have been having the urge to get back to oil painting these last few days, though, and there is a blank canvas sitting on my easel now, just waiting.

And a personal note - I was going to post a tongue-in-cheek entry titled "Farewell to an Old Friend", as of this morning. It was going to be in recognition of the fact that the iMac computer that I have had here on my desk for the last 10+ years, and has been the computer that I have written every post on this blog since late 2010, seems to be in its death throes. It is labeled a "mid-2010" manufacture and has served me more than admirably, contributing in excess of a decade of service. I'd like to see your PC do that... Anyway, starting a few days ago, the display sometimes works, sometimes doesn't, and the poor old machine randomly shuts itself down to rest. The exhaustion of old age, I guess. It is running the Mac OS that is three entire versions back since it doesn't have the ability to be upgraded any further than it already has been, and there is modern software that it cannot run... I write this post on its successor, a late 2019 manufacture iMac purchased shortly before the pandemic in November 2019. Despite being the newer machine, and far better in capability, it got relegated to the basement, used intermittently while I plugged away on the old one. I'm not 100% sure why. Creature of habit I suppose. But everything has been transferred to the new machine, and I hope it can give me anywhere near the service the old iMac did. So...tongue-in-cheek, farewell to a very old friend. In a strange and ridiculous way, I will miss you.

The reality check that made this intended post seem superfluous was a text earlier this evening from my "other brother" Leo letting me know that a wargaming friend of ours passed away yesterday. We are in our mid-50's, and this friend was a good bit our senior (into his early 70's I think), but I had known him for the last 20 years or so. It wouldn't be fair to say we were close, or that my contacts with him in the last decade or so were anything more than random meetings at the various HMGS wargaming conventions a few times a year, but it is a shocker nonetheless. He was a good guy, and the world will be a bit the lesser without him. In the sense the actually matters... Farewell Old Friend. You will be missed, and remembered.

What I learned from Dad

It would take way more than one post to elaborate on the above, but, in lieu of that, I'll confine myself to one answer and the root causes of that answer...

Be involved in what your kids are involved in.

Brother Dave was a very good baseball player in little league; a slick fielding shortstop (he could actually catch the ball) and a pitcher who could reliably get the ball over the plate (a rare thing in little league).

So what did Dad do? He coached little league baseball. For several years.

Dave and I were involved in band and orchestra in junior high school (back when there was a "junior high school" and not "middle school"), and on into high school.

So what did Dad do? He got involved in the parents' organization and helped with Hoagie Day fundraisers in junior high, and Spaghetti Dinner fundraisers in high school, and was on the parents' board of directors for these organizations. Looking back, I realize how much of his time he invested in what Dave and I were doing. Coaching baseball. Coaching soccer. Band and orchestra Boards. Teaching us to fish. Hiking in the woods with us and our friends. All of it.

I was aware enough to recognize this at the time, but now, having kids of my own, I feel like I can truly appreciate it.

Grace, and Julia before her, were involved in the Drama Club and all of the musicals. Amparo has given huge amounts of her time to this.

Grace has been very involved in Band, and I have given time to this as a parents' Board member.

What would Dad have done? He would have done what I have done, and what Amp has done. Given his time and attention to his kids' interests.

So I might have my faults, but I have at least learned something over the years.

And years down the road, hopefully Julia and Grace will be able to look back and recognize that their Mom and Dad cared, and that the time we spent wasn't for us...it was for them.

What Summer Might Bring

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, we had a second baby girl.

Julia holding Grace on her birthday

Then she grew. And got smart. And ambitious about her future.

We had an interesting discussion tonight at the dinner table (prompted by her) about summer programs that she could apply for in the gap between her junior and senior high school years. She is looking at a bunch of medical science programs that would be relevant to her interest in neuro-pharmacology (whatever that is...). Assuming these summer programs happen, of course.

Field Major Grace

There are programs of related relevance in Philadelphia (Drexel and the University of Pennsylvania), Washington DC (Georgetown University) among others. Somewhere in the discussion, she ruled out the University of Pennsylvania's summer program because she told us that their program was too expensive. I'm not sure of the context in which she reached that conclusion, other than that a perceived sizable amount of money is a perceived sizable amount of money.

Which I have been thinking about in the hours since...

I was able to go to a world-class liberal arts college in part because I was able to get accepted to that school, but just as (or maybe more) importantly because my parents and grandparents lifted me up and gave me the opportunity to do so. I will never forget how fortunate I was to have that door opened for me. Being able to get accepted to a school doesn't mean much if you can't afford to actually go there, or if you do but then spend the next few decades saddled with crippling student loan debt....

Which I guess brings me back around to my original thought. It's Grace's job to aim for the stars. It's our job to build a rocket to help her get there.

Now I have to go Google neuro-pharmacology...

Painting Progress

On the 15th of February, 2020, almost exactly one year ago, I painted my first-ever painting in oils. Something I have been wanting to do perhaps my whole adult life.

The painting, a Bob Ross inspired mountain scene, was painted without the proper tools, any knowledge of what I was doing, and it was a mess. And I say this with great fondness. It was my first painting. There is a bit of atmospheric perspective between the near and distant mountains...and that's about all the good that can be said about it. Which is fine.

Bob Ross?? (Bob would deny this...)

I went looking for it today, but I think I threw it away a few months ago in a fit of frustration that it was a bad painting, while cleaning up in the basement. Sigh. I'm stupid sometimes. Perhaps more often than I'd like to admit.

I only post this picture again in the hopes that I can look back on the past year and reflect on all that I have learned, which is a lot. I have a very long way to go to be able to create the paintings that I can see so perfectly clearly in my head. But I find it encouraging and energizing to think that I have progressed from that first painting to some of what I have been working on recently.

It's a journey, and I am enjoying it.

Times Change, and the Society of Ancients

When I started this blog in September of 2009, approximately 944 posts and eleven and a half years ago, I couldn't have imagined how much my life, and my focus, would change. The intent of the blog at the start was to be updates on my hobby of historical miniatures wargaming (toy soldiers for adults). Painting figures. Fighting tabletop battles. Collecting figures. Conventions. Making terrain pieces.

That was more or less true for a while, off and on for the better part of at least half a decade, interspersed with bits of whatever else was going on in my life.

Inevitably, the blog would ride the tides of my current areas of interest for a certain period of time. It's fascinating to take some time and go back through what the majority of the posts have been for blocks of time over the years.

Sometimes, beauty is right outside your front door...

Historical miniatures. Literature. Hiking. Geocaching. Music. Sentimental trips down memory lane. Dungeons and Dragons and fantasy roleplaying games. Writing. Art. YouTube inspired re-visits to every concert I was ever privileged to attend in my (mostly) younger days. Family. My kids. Philosophical nonsense ramblings. Learning to paint and draw (art). Political rants. More family stuff. Dog pictures.

Whose chair is this, anyway?...

This rambling journey was brought sharply into focus when the editor of Slingshot, the publication of the esteemed Society of Ancients, a wargaming society in England, contacted me to ask if some pictures from my blog could be used in their publication. Of course I said "of course". And they used some pictures in their most recent issue, and credited me, which was a great honor. Part of our gentleman's agreement was that they would include a link to my blog on their website. Which got me to thinking. My blog hasn't really been primarily about miniatures gaming in quite some time. Recently, my blog has included political rants that some might find...shall we say, off-putting. So I let the SoA folks know that they could scrap the link to my blog if they wanted, for that reason, which I think they did.

I'm proud of my political views and stand by them. Somewhere down the road I would like to think my kids will reflect on my liberal political and social views and respect me for them. I also recognize that this is a completely different thing than someone wanting to go to a blog and find miniatures wargaming content and get something different entirely. So, to the Society of Ancients and specifically the editor of Slingshot, thank you for using my pictures. It is an honor. You are a gentleman, and I thank you.

As for the rest of my blog...it is what it is. In 2009 it was intended to be an outlet for my miniatures wargaming hobby. The pictures used by Slingshot were mostly from 2014. In the ensuing 11+ years since the blog's inception it has proven to be an outlet for that and so much more.

Someday I may even post more wargaming content.

Fear of Failure

There is something that has become very clear to me as I continue on my learn-to-paint journey. I have a significant fear of failure. I work hard at my day job all day every day. And then I think about a painting that I would like to create in the evening or over the weekend. And more often than not, I am sad to say, that is as far as it goes.

I think. I plan. I think some more. And then I often do something other than picking up a paint brush and getting started. Maybe I should just watch a Flyers hockey game instead...

Why? The answer to that one is pretty easy. I expect that I will attempt a painting and not like the result. It is far easier to go to the Jerry's Artarama store in Newark Delaware, or even the local Michael's store, browse the art supplies, buy some stuff I don't need (because I already have more art supplies than I can use) and consider myself a fledgling artist, than it is to actually try to make some art.

Which is odd, in that many of the paintings I have actually completed have been OK, and I am able to look at them through the lens of someone who is a beginner at all this, and be happy at what I have done. Some of them I like a lot.

All of which I find strangely fascinating. I would consider myself to be relatively bright and relatively self-aware, and yet despite how easy it is to stand back and objectively recognize all of this, I am finding it hard to break the cycle of self-doubt.

Anyway, they say that the first step towards solving a problem is to admit that you have a problem. So, yeah, I have an actually-doing-the-thing-rather-than-just-thinking-about-doing-the-thing problem.

I'd like to work on a painting or two this weekend. I have a bunch of thoughts in my head.

Let's see what happens...

Inauguration Day

Today was quite a day in America. Some of the same. Some very different. Some odd. And some strangely normal. Strangely normal is refreshing these days.

On the one hand, an old white guy was sworn in as the 46th President of these United States. So...same old same old. 43 old white guys. Then a young black guy. Then an old white clown. And now another old white guy. Not much difference there.

On the other hand, after a never-ending string of old white guys as the Vice President, today we watched a Vice President-elect take the oath of office...and it wasn't the same old same old. It was a young, part Black, part south Asian woman.

It's certainly too early to call it a trend, but for over 200 years we had a monotonous string of the same thing. And within the last 5 years, we have had people of color, and a female, in the highest offices in the land. So, it's a start. I'm not saying that every high office should be held by a woman or person of color, but it would be nice if things moving forward better reflected what America looks like. More than 50% of us are women. Something along the lines of a third of us aren't white. And I say this as an aging white guy......every politician shouldn't look like me. Because when I look around, at work, in my neighborhood, in my kids' schools, and in the community at large...not everyone looks like me. And that's a good thing. A great thing. Our representative democracy should look like that too. When the few rule over the great many, it's not a good thing. It's not right, and from a practical standpoint, it's not sustainable. Revolutions are born out of that kind of imbalance.

It's also nice to think that there are little girls and little kids of color who are growing up in an America where there have always been minorities and women in the White House. That has never happened before. Not for my kids, and certainly not for me.

Some things are odd. An inaugural ceremony with very few people present. A parade to the White House with lots of military and police but almost no spectators.

And then there are some strangely normal things. Strangely normal things that seem odd but shouldn't. A daily White House press briefing that (A) actually happened, and (B) gave truthful information and answered questions openly and honestly, even if the answer was "I don't know (or can't say) but we'll get back to you". There are times when different is good, and there are times like this when a return to normalcy is what is needed. We need this.

As I write this, I have been wandering in an out of my home office, watching bits and pieces of the inaugural concert that is being shown on all the networks. So a few random thoughts... Lin-Manuel Miranda is a national treasure. There are performers out there that you (or I) may not know, but should. Kamala Harris is impressive. Young girls and kids of color look like they have another role model to look up to. Most importantly, we need to believe in hope, and a better future. It might be difficult to achieve, but striving for anything less is...why bother.

There is also the recognition that as good as today feels, there is a lot of hard work ahead. Digging out of a huge hole that somebody else dug is hard work. But necessary.

As Presidents Clinton, Bush and Obama just said on TV, the Biden administration's success is our success, so we work together for the greater good. I hope.

As a registered Republican but clearly a Democrat, I can say that when I look back at all of the modern-era former presidents (living or not), I can view all of them as good men regardless of their political affiliations and ideology. Carter was a largely ineffective president (much of this due to circumstances), but an absolutely wonderful human being. Bush the elder was a good man, a decorated veteran, and a patriot. Clinton might have been the brightest of the bunch, but had his flaws that undermined his successes. Bush the younger I generally strongly disagreed with while in office, but when viewed in his later years (without the likes of Cheney and Rumsfeld distorting my view), has consistently stood on the side of that which is right and good regardless of political party. Removing the politics, he is unquestionably a good man, and has earned my respect. I liked Obama a lot (being a liberal Democrat and all that). You can disagree on political ideology and yet recognize that each legitimately believed they were doing the right thing, and respect them for that. You win the election, you call the shots for a while. That's how it works.

Conspicuously absent today was the former grifter-in-chief. Which was good. There isn't enough time that will pass or a large enough bottle of wine to ever make the last four years right.

To Presidents Carter, Bush the elder (posthumously), Clinton, Bush the younger, and Obama: thank you for your service.

To President Biden: good luck, you're gonna need it.

To Americans everywhere: Keep the faith. It's gonna get better.

Life's Been Good

There is a lot of tragedy and suffering in the world these days, and that is good cause to reflect on how fortunate I am, and have been. And with luck, maybe, will continue to be...

Small reminders seem to be popping up frequently these last few days.

A Christmas present T-shirt from the Life is Good brand... [A perfect gift I might addd - this is Ryder in a nutshell...]

An offhand comment from the kids: "we're lucky, this was a good Christmas".

And YouTube teeing up an Eagles song while I sit here at my desk doodling on some Dungeons and Dragons maps in the hopes that me and my friends will get to play again some day in the not too distant future. The Eagles song? Life's Been Good, of course.

That's very true. Life has indeed been good. I'd like to think that I am appreciative enough of my good fortune on a daily basis that I don't need the reminder, but if there is some higher power out there emphasizing the point, then thanks. Things haven't always been perfect. Or easy. I've succeeded at some things and failed at others. There have been challenges, and will continue to be.

But all in all, I would agree with Joe Walsh. Life's been good to me so far.

2020 Sucks

This year has been, with minor exceptions, horrible. And it shows every indication of getting far worse this winter before it hopefully gets better in the spring.

Nothing is normal. Everything is cancelled, or at least postponed. I'm an admitted homebody and confirmed introvert, but even I can't do many of the things that I would normally do. I have a hard time imagining what an extrovert must be feeling.

Covid scares are everywhere. We've had a few negative tests in the family. So far so good, I guess. But we have friends that have had it, some milder and some worse. And some friends and family dead and gone.

I'm generally a positive and optimistic person, but it's difficult sometimes. Stories are everywhere about the mental health impacts of the pandemic, and I can empathize. As I said, I am a generally happy and optimistic person, but it's hard sometimes. And if it's hard for an optimist...

In these tough times, I find myself falling back on the things that give me comfort and joy. Family. Cooking. Fiddling around (badly) on the guitars hanging on the wall in the basement. Learning to paint.

Music continues to be, as it has always been to me, a comfort. And while silver linings during the pandemic are hard to come by, there are a number of musicians and bands posting great videos of quarantine music. I envy their talent, and am thankful for what that talent brings into the world.

The Doobie Brothers YouTube channel is a gem. I have posted links to some of their songs before, but they recently posted a video, with Peter Frampton, of the Eric Clapton song Let It Rain, which has always been a favorite of mine.

Another great channel has been John Fogerty's, where he posts new versions of his classic songs accompanied by his daughter and two sons. This is City of New Orleans, from a few months ago. And here is Have You Ever Seen the Rain. Check out the rest of their songs from this year on his channel.

Be well. Check on your friends to see how they are doing. Talk to people. 

Wear a mask.

Stay safe.

What Passes for Normal

We're in the middle of August, and we're supposed to be halfway through the first week of band camp. If there were a band camp this year, which there isn't. At least not until maybe sometime in September. I've taken the week off anyway, as time is going by quickly, and there's no particular need to take days off, but I need to take some eventually, so, yes, this week is vacation. We should have been at the beach last week, and helping with band camp this week and next. Instead, we are home. Again. Like always.

In lieu of band camp, there will be socially distanced outdoor sectionals next week and the week after. I spent much of the morning today cutting wind instrument bell covers of all different sizes from exercise fabric (82% nylon and 18% spandex), which is the recommended fabric for homemade bell covers. It is said that you learn something new everyday, and over the last few days I have learned that the bell diameters of various musical instruments are (typically) as follows. Trumpets 5 inches. Clarinets 3 inches. Alto saxes 4.75 inches. Tenor saxes 6 inches. Baritone saxes 7+ inches. Baritones 10 inches. Trombones 8 inches. Mellophones 10.5 inches. Sousaphones 25 inches. And that the GV band this year has roughly 27 trumpets, ~35 saxes of various types, 7 trombones, 1 baritone, 2 sousaphones, 5 mellophones, 17 clarinets, and who knows what all else. It's a big band for us, with a big incoming freshman class. And fraught with uncertainty. The district and the volunteers are all doing a lot of work in the hopes that we can have some sort of band season this year.

On the home front, we are all still healthy. The company I work for still continues to be doing more Covid testing than any other commercial lab in the country, so that feels good. Amp still works in a dialysis clinic serving Covid patients, so that feels good too. The kids are starting to climb the walls a bit, which is to be expected. But no serious complaints.

I haven't been feeling much like creating any art recently (i.e. painting), but hopefully that will change with my sister in law's family staying with us this week (since she is a watercolor painter). I've been writing a little, but not much.

The biggest news here, I guess, is that Grace passed her learner's permit test and is now beginning the process of learning how to drive. She and I go out at least a little bit practically every day. She needs the experience of time behind the wheel, but she is doing fine, and our driving sessions have been remarkably stress-free thus far. Fingers crossed.

It's hard to believe that my little girl has turned 16, and is the tallest female on her Mom's side of the family. Mom is 5'4+". Julia is 5'2" on a good day. Her two aunts are less than that. A lot less... She is a shade under 5'6", and growing fast the last couple of years (a good 6 inches+). It's a remarkable thing to watch. And funny as well. I laugh on the inside when I find myself saying things like "where's the rest of your shirt?", "are you planning on wearing that outside the house?", and "what's with the green hair?". Most of which is just giving her a token hard time to let her know that we care, and that we are paying attention. I figure as long as she's taking all Honors and AP classes and getting fantastic grades, she can color her hair any color she wants.

Anyway... We forge ahead, doing the best we can with what passes for normal these days. School in the fall is still up in the air, with at least the first month being entirely virtual. Beyond that, who knows. The current occupant of the White House is still a worthless moron. So, same old same old. Hopefully in the not too distant future, things change for the better. I wish you all peace, health and happiness.

Appreciate the simple beauty in the world

Stay safe and wear a mask.

Dereliction of Duty

Political rant warning. Feel free to click away now...

It's the 4th of July weekend, one of the centerpieces of an American summer. Independence Day. Beaches and barbecues. Hot dogs and hamburgers. Swimming pools and fireworks. Beer and wine and family and friends. Group gatherings.

In normal times. But these aren't normal times. Or even close.

The rampant a$#holery coming out of the White House never ceases, or even slows down. In a couple of national speeches (thinly veiled white supremacist political rallies) this weekend that only sought to further divide us, the current occupant of the White House assured the American people that 99% of Covid-19 infections are "totally harmless". A direct quote. "Totally harmless". An odd statement, one might characterize it, given that we have 129,000+ dead and 2.874 million confirmed cases. So...if you round the numbers to make them slightly better, we have a death rate of 4.4% of confirmed infections. 4.49% actually (or 4.5% to round it mathematically). To say nothing of the other people who get sick and stay sick for a couple weeks or more, some of whom require hospitalization. So I guess that "99% harmless", compared to the actual number of less than 80% "harmless" is..what?...a rounding error? A$#holery.

So we get white supremacist political rally speeches in lieu of Presidential holiday addresses. And we  get flyover parades of military might that would make the Kremlin and North Korea proud. The only thing missing were the convoys of truck-mounted missile launchers trundling down Pennsylvania Avenue to the accompaniment of goose stepping soldiers. Which, to be accurate, the current occupant of the White House has previously stated his desire for. The tanks and armored vehicles anyway. Fortunately, the mayor of Washington DC didn't want her streets chewed up by tank treads.

We have a self-proclaimed "wartime president" who has surrendered and left the battlefield, leaving us all to fend for ourselves. He can say some of the stupidest and most irresponsible things ever uttered by an American Pre$#. And the public health officials won't call him on it because if they do they will get fired. Which is part of the reason we are where we are.

Pravda over on the Fox News Channel barely even recognizes that Covid-19 exists anymore. I'm sure they have more important things to do, like continue to dig into the critical current issue of Hilary Clinton's email servers, or trying to answer the age-old question "why do Democrats hate America so much?"

Large population states with republican governors, eager to appease this person and toe the party line, ignored the science. Florida. Texas. Arizona. They are now paying the price, setting records for new infections every day. Hospitals are at or nearing capacity. To be fair, there are blue states like California that are also going backwards. People need their SoCal beaches, bars and restaurants in the summer after all. We have freedoms.

The rest of the world must be looking on in horror as we spiral out of control. I would say that they are laughing at us, but pity is probably more accurate. Europe is opening up, but not to Americans. Not that I can blame them.

Almost all states are going backwards at this point. A lot of that is driven by pretty much no states meeting the federal guidelines for reopening, but we are reopening anyway. Or we were until just recently, when more and more states have started clamping down again. It's July. We should be reflecting on all the good things we did to flatten the curve and get this under control. Celebrating the sacrifices we made, and the positive impact they had. Instead, we are looking at another round of shutdowns. We are back where we were in March. Although, to be accurate, we are in worse shape as a country than we were in March. Did we do all that for nothing? The numbers say probably, yeah. We made all the sacrifices and reaped little of the intended longterm benefit. Maybe I'm wrong. I hope I'm wrong.

I get that people are tired of this. I'm tired of this. More than I can express. But this Covid-exhaustion has made us complacent (if you believed that this wasn't a democratic hoax in the first place). I get it. The only social thing I have done since March 12 is to sit on someones's deck one time with 4 other people, wearing masks and seated many feet apart from each other as we discussed what the marching band season might look like in the Fall. This Covid weariness puts us in a bad spot as much as anything.

Ugh.

Happy birthday, America. Land of the free.

Masks

Americans like to think of ourselves as special, and we certainly have an overly developed sense of superiority. We might be the richest nation on Earth, but sometimes we are just dumb as f#$%.

Masks.

The simplest, most effective way to slow the spread of a pandemic that is devastating our country. If you believe in science. Which apparently many of us do not.

The level of ignorance required to turn a basic public health reality into a political statement is hard to comprehend. For which we have the current occupant of the White House to thank. That person won't wear a mask to set an example. The CDC says wear a mask. The World Health Organization says wear a mask. Pretty much every public health official or medical professional in the entire world says "just wear a mask".

Nope. No can do here in America.

We have rights. We have freedoms. We have liberties. No pesky public health officials can tell us what to do.

So most of us wear masks. Many do not. We have rights after all. Science? Never heard of it...but we're good at Fortnite.

We've made masks a political statement.

Personal freedom. I'm all for that. I'm just not sure how you can reconcile your desire for personal freedoms with the fact that your exercising of your personal freedoms could be killing your family and friends, or your neighbors, or any random person you run into at the grocery store.

Just wear a f#$%ing mask. Please.

America Burning

America is burning and the current occupant of the White House needed a photo opp. So... tear gas and rubber bullets on peaceful protestors.

I guess First Amendment rights are subjective. God forbid we infringe on anyone's Second Amendment rights, because we all need assault rifles, but the First Amendment.... meh... when it's convenient.

It's astounding to me where we are as a country. And saddening. We are 50+ years after the historic days of the civil rights movement, and this is what we see on the news. Maybe we haven't made any progress at all.

We watch current events on the news. We try to stay informed. And we try to have a meaningful discussion with our kids. Looting is bad. Burning cars is bad. Throwing stuff at the police is bad. Anarchy and chaos is not the answer. Maybe understandable in a way, but not the answer.

But we also make sure that our kids know that every American should be outraged. And we should all protest the racial inequity that still exists. If we aren't in a place to be able to literally join, arm in arm, with our fellow human beings that are actually out there standing in the streets, we should support them. Support them with our voices and more importantly our votes. Not just to make ourselves feel better, but to actually hope to affect a real change.

Every American should support the protestors. Not the burning. Not the looting. But support the peaceful protesters. We Americans like to think of ourselves as great. Because we are a rich people. A dominant military power. For what that's worth. If anything. History will be a more objective judge, and perhaps not so kind.

If we truly want to be great, we need to lead. Lead ourselves toward a future that is better than today. Or sadly, at least keep pace with most of the rest of the world, which seems to be more socially advanced than us.

Most police are good. The story of the Flint Michigan sheriff who laid down his baton and helmet to peacefully march in solidarity with protestors warms my heart and gives me hope for the future. Celebrate the good. Weed out the bad. For the benefit of everyone.

One people.

Change is good. Righteous change is great.

At the most basic level, all people want the same thing. A roof over their head. Food to feed their families and keep them from hunger. Safety from persecution. Protection from living in fear. Shouldn't this be the most very basic thing that we can all agree on?

Let's teach our children in the hopes that their generation will be better than ours.

Senior Sadness and the Little Things

It's quarantine day 64 in our household, and instead of having an end-of-year Drama Club banquet tonight to celebrate this school year, there is a one hour video on YouTube, followed by a Zoom after-party for anyone who wants to join. It's the best that can be done as an alternative to the usual, but just another example of the great many ways that this spring is a very different and disappointing one for our Seniors.

The involvement that Amp and I have with school activities drives this point home very strongly. Amp is the creative head of costumes for the Drama Club, and I am a board member for the Band Parents Association. Amp has been doing costumes for 7 years now, and has known all of these graduating seniors for years. I did some volunteering for the band last year, and had my first year as a board member this year. I've gotten to know the students in the band pretty well. Band camp. Evening practices throughout the fall. Bus rides to away football games. All the games, home and away. Competitions. A multitude of hours spent with these kids for both of us.

Seussical Costumes

The seniors don't get their spring semester as usual, or the Senior Prom, or the various end-of-year activity celebrations, or graduation. Or any of it. It's a shame, and I wish it could be different for them. They are good kids, and like everybody else affected by these world events, they deserve better. I'm sorry, Seniors, and I wish I could tell you that in person.

I suppose the best we can do now as we get through each day is to recognize and appreciate the little things in life. Which I suppose is a good reminder that you should take the time to appreciate the little things in life each day no matter what. This afternoon, while finishing up the week's work at my desk in my home office, I looked out my window and saw the picture below. It's the warmest day of the year thus far (84 degrees at 4pm) and Grace and Ryder were sitting in the grass, basking in the sun. Regardless of what else is going on in the world, this makes me happy.

Grace and Ryder

Please stay safe everyone, and take a moment to think about something you can be thankful for.

Copying Art, and Different Media

As I've been spending all of this time drawing, painting, thinking about drawing, thinking about painting, watching YouTube videos about.....etc, a couple of questions keep lingering at the fringes of my consciousness. The first question is...should I be concentrating on one kind of painting instead of dabbling in oils, acrylics and watercolors? Second, should I be spending less time copying other peoples' work and more time on creating my own original works?

At least at the moment, I think...

Dabbling in a number of different media is an invaluable learning experience. I might end up being better at some things than others. I might end up enjoying some things more than others. But you won't be able to get a feel for that unless you try different things. In that respect, I literally am a middle school or high school student. At this point I am content to immerse myself in as many different media as possible in the expectation that a path forward, at least in the immediate term, will reveal itself. If not, the dabbling continues, which is also fine, and will continue to be valuable.

Oils. I am loving painting in oils. You can blend for days. Literally. They are forgiving in the sense of being correctable while still wet (which again, is for days). There is a richness that you can't get from watercolors or acrylics. They are the classical media if you are into the snob-appeal thing. But they are finicky. And they are the one media that I wouldn't feel comfortable doing on my desk in my office or on the kitchen table. They are messy and complicated. But they are soooooo good.

Acrylics. I alternately love and am immensely frustrated by these. It's great that they dry so quickly from the perspective of adding to your work in layers. But they dry so quickly. You need to know what you are doing and commit, or the moment is gone. Blending is hard. I know there are various mediums and additives that will prolong working time, etc, but I am not that sophisticated yet. Quirky but fun.

Watercolors. Perhaps the most mysterious of the three painting media that I am fiddling with, at least to me. So simple looking. So hard to do well. Perhaps even more so than acrylics, you get one chance to do it right. In my very limited experience, you can fix errors in oils or acrylics, but not so much so in watercolors. Or not at all really. I have to admit watercolors intimidate me more than oils or acrylics. Easy to do kinda OK. Probably the hardest for a beginner to do well.

As for the second question, copying versus original pieces, that's a simpler answer, at least for the moment. I am so early on my learning curve that I just want to try as many techniques and styles as possible. I don't want to spend too much time worrying about composition or other considerations. I just want to practice. Almost everything I do these days is simply an attempt to answer the question "can I do that?"

For now, that's fine. It won't be forever. But it is for now.