Sir Froig

Sir Froig - the Moonlit Knight

A marshy inlet near Marqueyssac would be unremarkable save for the fact that a small rain cloud continually hangs low in the sky above it - and for the strange little fellow who lives there. In most respects he appears no different from a simple if uncommonly large frog, but what noticeably sets him apart (aside from his obvious intelligence and ability to speak) is his albinism.

The creature calls himself “Sir Froig.” He moves in a human-like fashion, sitting with legs crossed or standing up on his back legs - and he’s quite fond of halfling pipeweed. He’s very sociable and happy to trade his vast knowledge of herbs for his favorite smoke, and is sometimes sought by those of magical training for advice or ingredients. He’s not hard to find: the small cloud above his home is an unmistakeable “airmark” and made use of as a traveling aid for those new to the region.

Though typically friendly, he can be arrogant, and short of temper and patience if a large group of young frogs are preparing to leave the water for the first time. When this happens, he will hop about frantically, shooing away (or worse) any imagined threats to the frogs’ well being.

Sir Froig - HD 7, HP 38, AC 7[12], Mv 9, CL/XP:8/800, Atk: Special: Spits acid (Dmg d6, range 30’). Thrice per day he can croak a noxious cloud (treat as Stinking Cloud). He speaks with plants and animals (per the spells). He is never without a Flower of Protection from Evil and a basket filled with magical herbs and spell components.

In his underwater den, Sir Froig has a small Umbrella of Weather Controlling which he uses to keep a rain cloud permanently hovering over his marsh. He will defend this with his life.

Sir Froig is an ally of the nearby High Druid as well as the Witches of Belves.

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4x6" PDF with Paper Mini version:
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Inspiration comes from the strangest of places. I knew that I wanted to stat Tim’s frog statue the moment I saw it, so I began writing and working up a Sir Froig mini even before seeing JB’s fat frog challenge (also inspired by the proud creature!)... I thought I should just go ahead and post it here.

Hecatha, The Three Headed Witch

In a secluded glade in the lands of the High Druid lives a witch and her two sons. The druid has given them a small cottage and warned the creatures of Marqueyssac to avoid them, for the family has a horrible curse, so powerful that neither the druid nor his associates are able to lift it.

The curse’s effects are obvious - the witch has three heads. As for her sons, they’ve lost theirs completely, though they continue to live. A giant eye finds its place in the center of each of their torsos, and these dart about quickly, never missing the slightest movement.

The witch is known as Hecatha, and her sons she calls Lorb and Morb. Though they have no ears to hear with, they nevertheless do hear their mother and are quick to do her bidding. How the druid came to know the witch and her sons and why he gives them sanctuary is known only to them, but some surmise he may have he found her condition of particular interest because of her split personalities; one of the heads is quite lawful, one very chaotic, and the third diplomatic. At one time the separate heads were able to get along peacefully with one another through the efforts of the central and most neutral one. These days though, the chaotic head dominates the others through her sincere threats to kill herself. The stress and frequency of these threats is slowly eroding Hecatha’s sanity.

Though Lorb and Morb were once human, the curse has given them superhuman strength. They aren’t mindless, but without continual direction from their mother, they tend to sit on the ground and stare at her. They seem quite peaceful in this state, and they’re rumored to be fond of birdsong. Even so, they won’t hesitate to come to the aid of their mother, nor will they delay in the slightest if commanded by her to kill.

Hecatha - Witch 5, HP 16, AC 8[11], Atk dagger d4, Str 9, Dex 12, Con 15, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 4 (9 if cured, or if you block two of her heads with a hand when looking at her I suppose). Ring of Protection +1, Potion of Healing on her person. Spells: Fear, Fog, Hold Portal, Hypnotize, Mirror Image, Sleep.

Lorb & Morb - HD 2+2, HP 13 and 14, AC 8 (a natural 20 blinds them), Atk 1 (fists for d6), Special: Can’t be surprised, immune to Sleep. If both brothers successfully hit the same target on the same round, they will attempt to tear it apart - no to hit roll required, 2d6 damage per round, Save (with STR modifier) to escape their clutches. They will cease attacking if their mother is killed and literally cry themselves to death over her.

The Star of Veyrines

Veyrines is a small village of only about a hundred inhabitants, not far from Castelnaud in the Dordogne. It is unremarkable in nearly every respect, save for a regular occurrence every Spring. Over several days, a woman’s voice can be heard in the village square at around midnight, singing ascending and descending scales as though practicing for a performance. Once verified, messengers are sent to all of the valley’s towns and castles in order to announce an impending event: the appearance of a beautiful woman, a ghostly apparition, who will sing a lengthy elegy before disappearing again until the following year.

She is known as The Lady of Veyrines, and the annual event has become both the boon and bane of the small village. Typically, an audience of a thousand or more will descend there, packing itself into within ten feet of the place where she appears at night. The crowd spills out into adjacent streets and alleys, and the shops and houses which border the square become filled with spectators watching from every window. Scaffolding is hastily erected to support even more viewers.

Though the local inhabitants benefit economically from this short lived tourism, they also suffer the next day from the waste of these spectators, and from the petty crime that surges before The Lady’s performance. When the ghost sings, however, all are silently united in respect and astonishment, even those who can only hear and not see the apparition - such is the exquisite beauty of her voice. She never seems to notice her large audience, and once she and her song have faded away, the great throng departs peacefully and thoughtfully.

Her existence is as great a mystery as her lyrics. All agree that her song is one of lament for a lost lover, but though everyone who hears her is completely enthralled by them, her words themselves seem to fade from memory as swiftly as her beautiful form… and faster than any pen can record.

Candy

A number of years ago, Chef Tirel employed an enterprising halfling as live monster bait. Named Tim, this halfling would accompany adventurers that Tirel had hired to retrieve fresh meat for his own employer, the infamous monster eating Claude de Sarlat. Tim was desperate for high paid work, being in debt to some of Sneedsworth’s men in the Dordogne. Long story short, on one expedition the little halfling had his legs torn completely off by an ogre. Through the intervention of a cleric, Tim miraculously survived but would never walk again.

Nowadays, Tim can be found in the bastide of Domme, frequenting pubs where he performs his version of a stand up comedy act. Reciting bad limericks, re-telling stories of his brief stint as monster bait, and accompanying a little guitar, he’s now known as Tiny Tim. He’s become quite the local celebrity. Halflings are extremely rare in the region, and those that do pass through are continually subjected to local inside humor which takes the form of loud exclamations like “It’s a miracle! The little guy’s got his legs back!” Consequently, Tim isn’t hard to find and is often sought out for whatever information or advice he can offer to visiting greenhorn dungeoneers.

Tirel, for his part, was honorable enough to pay off Tim’s debt. Without his skilled little halfling though, Tirel was forced to devise other ways to occasionally draw monsters out of their hiding places. Towards this end, he came up with a number of recipes rumored to have ghastly ingredients that work far better than simple horsemeat or chickens. He’s even begun to determine which work better than others based on which monster one wishes to catch. Occasionally he’ll offer to sell his monster bait (which he confectionately refers to as his “bonbons”) to traveling adventurers in the course of offering them a reward for any monster flesh they can acquire for him.

His usual bait comes in the form of head-sized chunks of rotten spiced meats of indeterminable origin, stitched together and which Tirel and his assistants jokingly refer to as “Paydays”… Another kind they refer to as “corn” - palm-sized, it’s typically put down every ten feet or so to lead a creature to a predetermined ambush site.

Tirel sells his monster bait for up to 100gp depending on the quantity desired and the monster it will attract. Unless extreme precautions are taken the stench of it will cause townsfolk to shun the carrier, refusing service of any kind. It will double the frequency of wandering monster rolls and at least triple the likelihood of the desired creature making an appearance if in the area.

Sitcoms and Sorcerors

Six months later, I finally got around to writing up a tea circle of magic users for the Dordogne campaign. Sometimes I have a clear idea of how my NPCs will act, and other times I find their personality arising spontaneously. With these, there’s an obvious inspiration that will help guide their actions and personalities and maybe bring some laughs too...

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The weekly magic users tea party of Domme is an open invitation affair in this charming small bastide. The local magic users are nearly always all in attendance, and the meeting location goes back and forth between one Geronymous’ garden and the small, clean, and uncrowded establishment known simply as “Tom’s Tavern”.

It’s ostensibly an informal occasion, but in truth, the manners of everyone in attendance are highly scrutinized. If someone does not attend a meeting, they are invariably gossiped about at length by everyone else. Particular details of their dress or manner will be discussed and debated behind their back. Any seeming offense will eventually be brought to their attention inside or outside of the tea party, usually causing a short banning or boycott of the gathering by some of the parties involved. Otherwise the conversation revolves around the minutia of their lives, with occasionally more interesting stories contributed by Cranner.

Geronymous - Fairly good looking, charming, and slightly arrogant, this magic user (“Ger” for short) makes his income by traveling to small towns where he performs tricks and tells stories. He earns a decent living at this, and is quite popular with the ladies as well. Of the tea party’s members, he’s the most well adjusted and normal. He is the least likely to commit to going off on any wild adventure, but rarely he will if it seems fairly safe. He will not hesitate to leave any such party if things look like they aren’t going well. Both he and Jorgen are very protective of their magic and not likely to share their knowledge easily. Geronymous will go so far as to act as though he invented a particular spell, accusing others of stealing it from him (“So - you’re using my magic now?!?”)... At any given tea party, a female magic-using consort of his is often in attendance.

Jorgen - Short and stocky, but strong, Jorgen has a serious confidence problem. He looks up to Geronymous, and the two of them have been best friends since childhood (although what Geronymous gets out of the relationship at this point is questionable). Jorgen does surprisingly well with the ladies himself, considering his mediocre charisma, though part of this may have to do with the fact that he’s close to Geronymous. Jorgen’s finances are often in doubt, but somehow he always seems able to scrape through. He’s unlikely to ever hire on with a party unless completely desperate. Being a total coward, he will never put himself in danger, fleeing from it immediately without regard to the expense of others. Due to an embarrassing incident he doesn’t wish to discuss, he is particularly afraid of fire.

Ilaina - Short, pretty, and a bit of a firecracker, Ilaina actually went out with Geronymous for a while. But then what local magic using gal hasn’t? She still secretly pines for him, but will gladly court strong, handsome fighters (especially those that aren’t nearly as smart as herself). In comparison to the rest of the group, she is slightly more likely to think of others rather than herself in a crisis. She is unlikely to join a group of adventurers, but if she does, there’s a 50% chance she will decide against it at the last moment and not show up, and a 25% chance she will just forget about it beforehand.

Cranner - Tall, thin, and not terribly attractive, Cranner is nevertheless a very charismatic persona, although not quite as much as Geronymous. Though he appreciates the embrace of a woman, he does not crave it as most do. He is clearly the most independent of the bunch, and though never in need of money, he always has some profitable venture planned or actually in process. Even still, he likely has no cash upon his person, and will resort to asking for small personal loans. Of the regular tea party group, he’ll be the most likely to join any group of adventurers on a lark, but he is equally fickle and likely to flee in self-interest if his well-being is about to be compromised. He is always full of surprises in terms of his experience and is clearly well connected. Rumor has it that he may have once inherited a large sum of money, as it never seems to worry him and neither does he especially desire it.

Pneumis - Short and fat, always out of breath and breathing hard, Pneumis is an unattractive fellow, yet the best friend of Cranner. He is desperately in love with Ilaina, and always seeking to hear about her doings and to somehow gain her favor. Financially secure, he will undertake minor tasks in return for information about Ilaina’s desires and motivations. He dislikes Geronymous greatly but fears him - he wishes above all to see him humiliated and defeated, but is himself a coward and will only undermine his nemesis if he feels certain of victory or at least of anonymity in the process. Anytime a misfortune befalls either of them, each first assumes it’s the fault of the other.

Swords & Wizardry Stats:

Geronymous
5th level Magic User: HP 19; AC 9 ; ATK dagger for d4 damage
Spells: Charm Person, Hold Portal, Magic Missile, Protection from Evil, Invisibility, Phantasmal Force, Fly

Jorgen
3rd level Magic User: HP 15; AC 9 ; ATK dagger for d4 damage w/ STR bonus
Spells: Protection from Evil, Shield, Darkness

Ilaina
4th level Magic User: HP 12; AC 9 ; ATK dagger for d4 damage
Spells: Charm Person, Magic Missile, Sleep, Pyrotechnics, Strength

Cranner
4th level Magic User: HP 16; AC 9 ; ATK dagger for d4 damage
Spells: Charm Person, Shield, Light, Knock, Detect Evil

Pneumis
3rd level Magic User: HP 10; AC 9 ; ATK dagger for d4 damage
Spells: Hold Portal, Read Languages, Knock

Other tea party attendees:
•Consort of Geronymous: (likelihood 50%) 1st level MU or (likelihood 10%) 1-2nd level Elf
•Consort of Jorgen (likelihood 10%) 1st level MU, Ftr, or Thief
•Consort of Ilaina (likelihood 20%) 2-4th level Ftr or (10%) 1st-2nd level MU
•Consort of Cranner (likelihood 10%) 1-2 level MU, Cleric (Nun), or Ftr
•Random Traveling MU, level 1-3.

Sneedsworth the Money Lender

Occasionally, one needs a loan. The seeds didn’t take, the rats got into the flour, the pig died. In Wagstaff’s case, he got bit by a rat. Not a big deal in and of itself, until he realized after a couple of weeks that the wound wasn’t healing so well. Aside from that, he was just feeling weak overall - and worse every day. Sure, the local high ranking cleric could heal him… for a price. Though he didn’t have the money to pay, a new friend who’d recently inherited some money lent it to him. But what about those poor souls that couldn’t find or know anyone who could lend them money in a similar situation? The local church seems to have no pity for men such as these! Perhaps it’s just the way of the world - even in a land of magic, men must sometimes die poor, ignoble deaths.

But there is hope, in a sense, for these folk that have fallen by the wayside… for those that society has failed and who stare grimly at their own impending doom - due only to an empty wallet. Hope’s name is Sneedsworth and Associates!


A thin, balding man of between sixty and seventy years of age, Sneedsworth seems frail. Seldom seen, when he does make a public appearance, it’s with an entourage of attendants, helping him to move about with his cane. He’s a man of few words, businesslike in conversation: polite but to the point. He seems to smile at odd times and occasionally lose himself in thought. Sometimes this is mistaken for early senility - but the truth is far from it.

In fact, Sneedsworth is an assassin - and a nearly retired guildmaster at that. His headquarters are located in the largest city of the region. A brimming red cauldron of gold is the symbol that hangs outside, as it does outside the numerous branches scattered throughout the kingdom. This and the prominent “Sneedsworth’s” name on such signs are all that’s necessary to both attract and warn passersby.

Sneedsworth's primary business has become money lending. Where other perhaps more reputable lenders would refuse a loan or require serious proof of credit, this is seldom if ever required by the customers of Sneedsworth’s. Here a man can simply rely on his own good word in order to obtain a loan. Small sums and large sums, it matters not - even nobles have approached Sneedsworth’s with requests for vast quantities of gold. Of course, the terms of these loans can only charitably be called extortionate. And repaid any loan best be, for the loan officers of Sneedsworth (high ranking assassins themselves) are deadly serious about their work.

Loan terms can vary wildly, from 0% interest (especially for first time, small loans to locals) up to 500% interest per day. In the course of coming to terms over a loan, virtually anything can become subject to negotiation. Typically, such negotiations are brief, and payment is expected within a short matter of time - from a day up to as much as a month. As opposed to many other shady lenders, failure to repay a loan when the final payment due date has been reached will not result in a price being put on the debtor’s head. Instead, Sneedsworth’s prefers to deal with such matters on their own, sending out its assassins when necessary. If it’s suspected that a customer knowingly took out a loan without ever intending to pay it back (perhaps intending instead to forfeit their life upon signing, as a sacrifice for some purpose the money could fulfill), then the family and friends of the customer may be targeted. If the sincerity of someone who’s been issued a loan is ever in doubt, torture (in addition to magical means) may be used to ascertain the truth. Sneedsworth makes no apologies for these “standard business practices” and the terms are always made explicitly clear to the loanee!

The tactics of Sneedsworth assassins run the gamut from the traditional (back stabbing, or poisoning of food and drink) to the more direct approach (such as waiting for a weakened party to exit from a dungeon before shooting them with poisoned crossbows), to the more example setting extremes of public, live disembowelment or burning. Sneedsworth’s has a reputation to uphold, and their “debt collectors” are not interested in last minute payment, although they are not averse to removing all of a debtor’s possessions before executing him.

Sneedsworth and Associates almost never accept solicitations for work involving assassinations - theirs has become a very specialized business. It’s also a very lucrative one, and its niche has allowed it to flourish while free from costly battles with other assassin or thieves guilds, some of whom even “bank” with Sneedsworth’s. Of course there are always those jealous of the success of others to be on guard against, as the guildmaster himself well knows.

Branches are maintained in meticulous compliance with headquarters’ standard operating procedures. No loans are made without being signed off on with two officers witnessing. Funds are not always immediately provided, and the movement of any large sum to or from a branch and headquarters is heavily guarded with mundane and magic power alike. All associates of Sneedsworth wear the red, gold filled cauldron symbol of the guild emblazoned on platinum medallions. The backs of these are inscribed with secret symbols: a riddle or one’s solution, which are known only by guild members.

Sneedsworth: Level 9 Assassin
Loan Officers: Assassins ranging in level from 4-7 .
Other “Associates” (assistants, guards, couriers, etc.) are fighters and assassins ranging in level from 1-3.

Swords &Wizardry Assassin Class per the S&W Companion

Sneedsworth has made his own deal with the devil known as Mammon, and serves his lord however he can when Mammon’s messengers call upon him.
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This post is dedicated to bankers everywhere.

Dordogne Campaign: The Great Druid of Marqueyssac

The Gardens of Marqueyssac are situated on a plateau just North of the the Dordogne river which forms the border between the Ogledd barony and the Ock lands. The location offers significant strategic and tactical advantages since it allows full view of both sides of the river valley. Yet no keep or bastide is found there - only a small disused chateau, a few stone buildings, and ruins.

This is the place where the Great Druid abides. He claims dominion over the entire butte where The Gardens are found. Though sometimes mocked under breath as "Oak Lover" or “Le Amant de Chênes” by the Ogledds and Ocks, he is also feared and respected. He seems to take no side in the ongoing dispute which periodically rages across the river and throughout the valley. Even still, he is sometimes sought for advice for advantage in the continuous warfare below, or for other purposes. Typically, his power and wisdom surpass the understanding of those who seek it.

Those endeavoring to meet him are frequently killed by the wild creatures that are especially protective of the territory they share with the Druid. Others are simply never heard from again. Those that do return from Marqueyssac are usually torn in their interpretation of the Druid’s words or have even gone mad. It’s said that once a century or so (the High Druid seems to outlive everyone), true wisdom and peace is achieved for a time with his aid. Some even say that one day, lasting harmony will be reached, The Druid somehow uniting the two kingdoms. Others wish for his death, saying that his very existence creates a false hope among the people. Among these are jealous priests of various faiths in the area, and in particular, the Priests of the Magic-Eating God whose numbers are increasing from the southeast.

Claude de Sarlat, Monster Eater

This post is Open Game License content.

Claude de Sarlat is an eccentric and very wealthy gourmand. He regularly employs groups of adventurers to hunt down, kill (or trap), and retrieve for him various creatures - mostly four footed monsters but also exotic flora and fowl. Claude eats it all. His chef, one “Tirel”, himself an eccentric and worldly character, gladly indulges Claude’s culinary desires. Without Claude knowing it, Tirel has even expanded his repertoire to include bipedal beasts such as owlbears (and others) but has not yet dared to surreptitiously introduce Claude to these more acquired tastes.

Claude owns a keep and has inherited a small fiefdom - while not exactly encouraging monsters to forage for human and demihuman fare of their own, he does seem to tolerate it - or at least does so according to many of his not so loyal nor admiring subjects. Rumors of his more exotic tastes have recently spread throughout the land, and his appetite is already legendary.

He is a large man: short of stature, but it would be unfair to call him “fat” - obscenely obese would be more accurate, or as Claude prefers, “most long of girth”. He wears an unfashionable mustache, which is typically encrusted with the remains of food, and he is almost constantly eating. Short-tempered and demanding, he’s very unpleasant to be around, and were it not for the fact that he pays extremely well (and can afford it), he would no doubt be quite alone. He’s always surrounded by personal servants and bodyguards, one of whom will have a bucket handy should Claude need to quickly vacate his stomach’s contents to make room for another course.

Claude is eager to employ experienced travelers and dungeoneers in his territory to retrieve for him some “free-range” meats from nearby grottos, preferably live or very freshly killed. Some of his servants are busy watching the local taverns for such travelers and will occasionally approach them with offers of employment (not revealing the actual name of their own employer). Acquired “game” should be presented to and will be paid for by Tirel directly.

Several other nobles have heard of Tirel’s exotic meals, and some wish to try them. Others feel the notion of eating monsters is an abomination and that Claude and Tirel are criminals whose actions imply that these creatures’ existence has a purpose and that they should not just be exterminated.

A long time ago, Claude was once a dungeoneer himself. Trapped by a cave-in, he sustained himself by living on the partially-eaten carcasses of battling monsters while awaiting rescue from outside. His survival was aided by his family’s greatest treasure, a Ring of Invisibility. Claude trained for a time as a magic user but his last dungeon experience turned him away from it (it also made him a touch mad).

Claude: Magic User 7: HP 28, AC 9 [11], Atk dagger d4, Str 10, Dex 9, Con 18, Int 14, Wis 8, Cha 7, Ring of Invisibility, Spells: Charm Person, Magic Missile, Read Magic, Sleep, Continual Light, Detect Invisibility, Stinking Cloud, Haste, Lightning Bolt, Charm Monster. He will seldom use the ring unless in extreme danger, and will only do so in conjunction with casting Haste upon himself.

Tirel: Fighter 4: HP 21, AC 5 [14], Atk long sword d8, Str 12, Dex 13, Con 14, Int 13, Wis 12, Cha 14.

Bodyguards (d6 at any given time) are 1st level fighters with a 2nd level captain.

(images from Monty Python’s “The Meaning of Life”, of course!)