Frankie

Looking for a longterm relationship: Don't let the rough exterior fool you, Frankie is as huggable as a patchwork quilt... stitched with love. A monster of few words, he enjoys long evening walks through the town square, playing golf during lightening storms, and tinkering in the workshop. Greatest fears: pitchforks, torches, and not finding true love.

Out of My Gourd - Homely Hubbard

The hubbard squash has an extremely hard outer shell and can be stored for long periods of time.  This misfit of the pumpkin patch may have a tough shell, but hides a sweet, delicious flesh that is great for baking, boiling, roasting, and purees.  The squash can grow up to 50 pounds!  Originally named in the 1840's when Elizabeth Hubbard gave seeds to a friend in a kind, neighborly gesture...  looking back, who in their right mind would gift such homely squash seeds to a friend?  I call shenanigans!

Expanding the Series

The "Out of My Gourd" Collection is slowly expanding.  "Slowly" is the key word since each pumpkin takes up to 3 hours of torch time to lovingly sculpt.  Who knew it requires so much effort to look so hideously silly?

The Batty Bunch

Here's a story, of a lovely lady
who was bringing up three very lovely bats
all of them had fangs of white, like their mother.
the youngest one in braces.

Here's a story, of a man named Batty
Who was busy with three bats of his own.
They were four vampires living all together
yet they were all alone

Till the one day when the lady met this fellow.
And they knew that it was much more than a hunch,
That this group must somehow form a family,
That's the way we all became the Batty bunch.

The Batty bunch, the Batty bunch.
That's the way they became the Batty bunch.

Yep, More Pumpkins

More pumpkins... because 1 is never enough. 
I hope the hours of thoughtful planning, testing color combinations, and loving patience at the torch is reflected in each pumpkin. They are a work from my heart.

 

 

Bat Breath

Do you find yourself running out of the key ingredient for Witch's Brew, then having to hop on the ol' broom and endure a late night run to Whole Foods?  Stress no more!  The solution, an endless supply of Bat Breath conveniently located in your pantry.  Warning:  Do not store in an airtight container.     

Best in Show

The Judges' scores are in... drumroll please! Best in Show goes to Pumpkin Spice! The scoring categories of "Only a Mother could Love this Face" and "Needs to see a Dentist" sent his point tally over the top.  Congrats!

Frick and Frack

The comedic duo enjoys traveling from town to town and preforming silly skits at county fairs.  One could probably look at the pair and correctly venture a guess on who is the "brains" behind the show verses the comedic brawn.  In addition to booking their appearances, Frick keeps his prankster partner in check.  If Frack had his way, their vagabond earnings would be squandered on sarsaparilla, cotton candy, and lotto tickets.  I would estimate at least 30% of their income is spent on glass eyeball replacements. Always rolling away during the show's intermission! Frick is a total saint to stick by him, but that is what brothers do.  You know what they say, "Pumpkin puree is thicker than water."

Zombie Ear

No need to call the authorities, this is NOT a Van Gogh moment, but thanks for caring.   Just an update on last night's zombie round up.  The severed ear can be strung on a necklace to create quite a statement piece.  The message?  "Don't mess with me zombie... I will put a sharp object through your diseased brain!" 

Harvest Time: Zombie Squirrel Eyeballs

The kids woke up bright and early, dawned their kevlar lined hazmat suits, and ventured outside to gather up some zombie squirrel eyeballs.  Like picking up pebbles on the beach, the plagued peepers just roll right out of their little eye sockets.  A bountiful harvest indeed!  After a quick rinse to remove the crusties, the petrified eyeballs are ready to be strung and worn in a Halloween jewelry design.  They measure approximately 10 mm in diameter.  Just message me on FB if you are interested in a set.   

Double, Double, Toil & Trouble

Meet Gladys the Grey.  She is 90% Witch, 10% Essential Oiler with a PhD in Herbology.  She prefers brewing vegan friendly potions from organic ingredients such as ear of corn, head of cauliflower, and eye of potato.  Her motto is do no harm, except for when someone takes her parking spot.  In instances like these, she has been known to unleash the flying monkeys and rattle off a curse or two.

Gargoyle Training

Don't let his wrinkles fool you, Garth is less than 300 years old... a young age for a gargoyle.  He hopes to someday join the famous gargoyles throughout history and permanently perch atop of a 12 century cathedral.  But first Garth needs to develop his mean face, practice holding still for long periods of time, and move with stealth when no one is watching... kind of like the Queen's Royal Guard, but without the puffy hat.  Who better to train him than the gargoyle greats?  #meanface

 

Mel, Roz, and Bosco taught "Perching 101: Overcoming Fear of Heights"

(Bosco is a bit camera shy)

 

 Snack time with Arnie and Guy 

 Striking a pose with Roy

Contemplating life's mysteries with Vlad

 

Shrill scream training with crazy Uncle Stan

Last but not least, Bucky taught the appropriate times to display fangs, claws, and bellybuttons for tourists' photos.

Nocturnal Struggle

Ever had a friend who stays up all night.  Just hanging around, catching bugs...  then in the morning they complain about the puffy bags and dark rings under their eyes.  The struggle is real.  #dontjudge #nocturnalstruggle

Bat Cave

Love at First Bite

Rockabilly Chic

Lucky Zombie's Toe No.2

More lucky than the cliché rabbit's foot.  Also, the perfect gift to tell that special someone, "Hey, time to schedule a pedicure."  Delightfully gross, if there is such a thing...  enjoy!

Wicked Witch

Ready to break out the Halloween decorations?  The witch is dead, but she left behind her stylish black hat.  And guess who found it???  Yep, Kooter did it again!  If a carrot doubled as a broomstick, the new witch would be in guinea pig heaven.

Here is a technicolor throwback to get you in the decorating mood.  Enjoy! 

 

Anyone else remember when these visual effects were cutting edge?

Blitz the Guinea Pig

Early this morning, Blitz decide to slip on the pumpkin suit and head to the garden.  The disguise didn't work... for heaven sake, pumpkins don't have ears!  As for now, the lettuce and carrots are safe.  Maybe next time he should go with the camouflage? 

 

Lucky Zombie's Toe