What a year. A year ago I developed a hole in the vision in my right eye and I had emergency surgery the next day for a torn retina, the first of four surgeries in the past year that saved my sight in that eye.
The worst was when the first surgery failed and the surgeon filled my eye with silicon the next week (surgery # 2) and for 5 months I went about with a foreign substance in a major organ (my eye) and don't think my body didn't know every minute of every day that there was something foreign in it that it couldn't expel. But surgery # 3 took the oil out, except for floating residual particles (that I call my asteroid belt) that lazily cross my vision in a flurry and I wonder if a lifetime of this will eventually drive me nuts. In other words, it seems as if often there are flies buzzing about on the periphery of my vision, except that they aren't there, unless it's that one in a thousand that actually is there.
This caused me not to run till my eye was fully healed, which I determined to be a month after my fourth and last eye operation in April. Meanwhile I put on dozens of pounds in my lethargy. (Any workout can strain the eye, in my feeling. And my vision had (has) flaws in it from the damage, especially in depth perception.)
In May I started coming back, running three times a week beginning with runs of 1/2 mile at a time that first week. I couldn't make the entire two laps around the track that first time out without having to walk. Last week I suffered a slight setback in my routine, but I have come back from that. More to come later.
Showing posts with label surgery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label surgery. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 30, 2019
Tuesday, April 30, 2019
Done?
Early this month I had my fourth and hopefully last eye surgery shortly after I returned from Europe, removing the cataract in my affected eye and putting in a plastic lens that I will have for life. It's pretty standard surgery but it's a little more tricky when the eye has suffered prior operations because the resulting trauma can damage the "platform" that house the lens.
I was more than apprehensive. Not only did I have the after-effects of a cold which caused me to need to cough every few minutes to clear my chest congestion but my three prior eye operations were definitely a mixed bag.
The first operation was dreadful, it hurt and I felt every cut and was ordered by the doctor several times to "Lie still!" which I did to the best of my pain-wracked ability. The second operation a week later after the first one failed, I was put to sleep, at my insistence, and they filled my eye with oil to keep the pressure up while I went through a week of dreadful face-down convalescence and while my retina slowly healed. The third operation, to get the oil out, they insisted that I be alert with only a local anesthetic, just like the first operation, so I could cooperate with the surgeon if necessary. I fell asleep on the table (or went out) so I only remember being wheeled in and waking up as I was wheeled out.
This time I had to cooperate with the surgeon again and I was awake throughout and did stare at certain lights upon command or moved my eye as directed. I felt pressure but no pain and had no distress; it helped that I knew what they were going to do (smash the existing lens with ultrasound to liquify it, remove it, then drop in the artificial lens through the cut in the cornea where it would unfold like a blooming g flower) thanks to an hour-long class I was required to take. I felt liquid, cold liquid, being splashed or washed over my eye several times and I was gripping the edge of the gurney in a death grip waiting for pain to intrude (sort of like when I'm in the dentist's chair) but it never came and then I heard the surgeon say, "It's finished," and I was wheeled out. In a few weeks I'll go to the optometrist to get a new prescription for corrective lens and see how well I'll be able to see again.
I was more than apprehensive. Not only did I have the after-effects of a cold which caused me to need to cough every few minutes to clear my chest congestion but my three prior eye operations were definitely a mixed bag.
The first operation was dreadful, it hurt and I felt every cut and was ordered by the doctor several times to "Lie still!" which I did to the best of my pain-wracked ability. The second operation a week later after the first one failed, I was put to sleep, at my insistence, and they filled my eye with oil to keep the pressure up while I went through a week of dreadful face-down convalescence and while my retina slowly healed. The third operation, to get the oil out, they insisted that I be alert with only a local anesthetic, just like the first operation, so I could cooperate with the surgeon if necessary. I fell asleep on the table (or went out) so I only remember being wheeled in and waking up as I was wheeled out.
This time I had to cooperate with the surgeon again and I was awake throughout and did stare at certain lights upon command or moved my eye as directed. I felt pressure but no pain and had no distress; it helped that I knew what they were going to do (smash the existing lens with ultrasound to liquify it, remove it, then drop in the artificial lens through the cut in the cornea where it would unfold like a blooming g flower) thanks to an hour-long class I was required to take. I felt liquid, cold liquid, being splashed or washed over my eye several times and I was gripping the edge of the gurney in a death grip waiting for pain to intrude (sort of like when I'm in the dentist's chair) but it never came and then I heard the surgeon say, "It's finished," and I was wheeled out. In a few weeks I'll go to the optometrist to get a new prescription for corrective lens and see how well I'll be able to see again.
Wednesday, December 12, 2018
Third Time's The Charm
This morning I had my third eye surgery since July, and hopefully the last. I have been anxious about this because my right eye has been filled with silicon oil since my last eye surgery in August, necessitated by the failure of the first surgery for a detached retina, which was the most painful surgery I have ever endured or would ever want to endure.
I was totally out for the second surgery, at my insistence, intubated and of course I didn't feel a thing. But for this morning's surgery my doctor insisted that I was to have only a local anesthesia, just like the first surgery, because he might need me to move my head or eye upon command as he worked inside the orb with his tiny instruments and magnification gadgetry, in case the retina started rolling up off its platform of cones and rods as my eye was being flushed of the oil.
I greatly feared another agonizing moment as the scalpel cut into my eye, and I fixated upon that possibility, already once realized, as the weeks approaching surgery drearily went by. I had a long talk with the anesthesiologist this morning pre-op, who was very sympathetic to my experience during the first surgery as I described it, and she said she had never had any other patient complain about eye pain during eye surgery but every case, and every head, is different and sometimes the nerves leading into the eye alongside the temple or maybe the cheekbone ridge aren't in exactly the same place as normal when the doctor put in the local pain-numbing or blocking cocktail of drugs.
I tried to be a big boy and I forced, or willed, myself to lie as still as possible if the incision hurt again, because that too would pass, as I lay on the gurney in the cold OR and everyone in scrubs bustled about me and spoke in clipped, precise sentences or issued crisp commands. The next thing I knew I became aware of being wheeled out of the OR with only a trace of memory of people moving about or above me and I hadn't felt a thing, and I was so euphoric about not experiencing any pain during the procedure that an hour later I was dressed and having breakfast with the friend who picked me up (all surgery is ambulatory these days) at a nearby diner.
I was totally out for the second surgery, at my insistence, intubated and of course I didn't feel a thing. But for this morning's surgery my doctor insisted that I was to have only a local anesthesia, just like the first surgery, because he might need me to move my head or eye upon command as he worked inside the orb with his tiny instruments and magnification gadgetry, in case the retina started rolling up off its platform of cones and rods as my eye was being flushed of the oil.
I greatly feared another agonizing moment as the scalpel cut into my eye, and I fixated upon that possibility, already once realized, as the weeks approaching surgery drearily went by. I had a long talk with the anesthesiologist this morning pre-op, who was very sympathetic to my experience during the first surgery as I described it, and she said she had never had any other patient complain about eye pain during eye surgery but every case, and every head, is different and sometimes the nerves leading into the eye alongside the temple or maybe the cheekbone ridge aren't in exactly the same place as normal when the doctor put in the local pain-numbing or blocking cocktail of drugs.
I tried to be a big boy and I forced, or willed, myself to lie as still as possible if the incision hurt again, because that too would pass, as I lay on the gurney in the cold OR and everyone in scrubs bustled about me and spoke in clipped, precise sentences or issued crisp commands. The next thing I knew I became aware of being wheeled out of the OR with only a trace of memory of people moving about or above me and I hadn't felt a thing, and I was so euphoric about not experiencing any pain during the procedure that an hour later I was dressed and having breakfast with the friend who picked me up (all surgery is ambulatory these days) at a nearby diner.
Sunday, December 9, 2018
Anxious
I am a lawyer. Do you think I ever get completely accurate information from doctors?
My 3d eye surgery comes up next week because the first emergency surgery, for a retinal tear, failed and the second emergency surgery filled my eye with oil which now has to come out. I can't wait for it to be over because I am dreading it.
Why did the first surgery fail? There was no reason given except that, me being an anomaly of that one in 10,000 people who inexplicably develops retinal detachment, I was further statistically unlucky in being in the ten percent of recipients of corrective surgery whose procedure did not adhere. How well I remember the first surgery where, having been given a local anesthesia, I shockingly felt the scalpel go into my eye like a hot spike and the doctor yelling at me as I thrashed around on the operating table to Be Still!
The surgeon explained to me on the day-after follow up checkup that I was extremely "anxious" about the surgery and therefore I reacted badly to the operation as it occurred and he wasn't able to fully "cement" the "background" of my eye with his laser as he wished to because I was moving around too much but he was able to fully zap the tears in my retina so the operation was a wrap although shorter than he wished. Except that a week later I was under the knife again because at the one-week checkup the retina (but not the tears) was detaching, but for that procedure I was totally under so I didn't (obviously) feel a thing.
For the third operation next week I am going to get a local again because for some reason, I have to be sentient during the delicate procedure while they swap out the W-40 for saline solution because otherwise I might retch involuntarily under general anesthesia but such an unlikely occurrence would "ruin" my eye if they had to . . . what, work to revive me?
Furthermore, with the white flares that erupt in my right eye several times daily bedeviling me, which the doctor said was my retina "flexing" and therefore exposing my optic nerve, I wonder if when the eye is cut open to drain the oil, whether my retina will "roll up" as the doctor explained to me might happen, in which case he would insert the gas bubble to keep the eye pressure up, which returns me to the July 31st surgery, the very first operation (that failed) and two weeks of face down recovery. Did you ever watch Groundhog Day? Go straight to Jail and do not pass Go.
I greatly fear the possibility of a stabbing pain in my eye during next week's operation similar to what I felt during the first operation because my memory of it is strong and my control of my body in response to such sudden intrusive pain is weak. But I have also come to think that the anesthesiologist for the first operation might have botched her part and they're not telling me that, and in my sudden pain then I moved involuntarily and that ultimately caused the first operation to fail, because it wasn't completed fully. I hate to be fearful, and I am wont to be suspicious, which leads me to be anxious.
My 3d eye surgery comes up next week because the first emergency surgery, for a retinal tear, failed and the second emergency surgery filled my eye with oil which now has to come out. I can't wait for it to be over because I am dreading it.
Why did the first surgery fail? There was no reason given except that, me being an anomaly of that one in 10,000 people who inexplicably develops retinal detachment, I was further statistically unlucky in being in the ten percent of recipients of corrective surgery whose procedure did not adhere. How well I remember the first surgery where, having been given a local anesthesia, I shockingly felt the scalpel go into my eye like a hot spike and the doctor yelling at me as I thrashed around on the operating table to Be Still!
The surgeon explained to me on the day-after follow up checkup that I was extremely "anxious" about the surgery and therefore I reacted badly to the operation as it occurred and he wasn't able to fully "cement" the "background" of my eye with his laser as he wished to because I was moving around too much but he was able to fully zap the tears in my retina so the operation was a wrap although shorter than he wished. Except that a week later I was under the knife again because at the one-week checkup the retina (but not the tears) was detaching, but for that procedure I was totally under so I didn't (obviously) feel a thing.
For the third operation next week I am going to get a local again because for some reason, I have to be sentient during the delicate procedure while they swap out the W-40 for saline solution because otherwise I might retch involuntarily under general anesthesia but such an unlikely occurrence would "ruin" my eye if they had to . . . what, work to revive me?
Furthermore, with the white flares that erupt in my right eye several times daily bedeviling me, which the doctor said was my retina "flexing" and therefore exposing my optic nerve, I wonder if when the eye is cut open to drain the oil, whether my retina will "roll up" as the doctor explained to me might happen, in which case he would insert the gas bubble to keep the eye pressure up, which returns me to the July 31st surgery, the very first operation (that failed) and two weeks of face down recovery. Did you ever watch Groundhog Day? Go straight to Jail and do not pass Go.
I greatly fear the possibility of a stabbing pain in my eye during next week's operation similar to what I felt during the first operation because my memory of it is strong and my control of my body in response to such sudden intrusive pain is weak. But I have also come to think that the anesthesiologist for the first operation might have botched her part and they're not telling me that, and in my sudden pain then I moved involuntarily and that ultimately caused the first operation to fail, because it wasn't completed fully. I hate to be fearful, and I am wont to be suspicious, which leads me to be anxious.
Sunday, September 16, 2018
Uh, okay so far...
I went in for the one-week-after check-up after my second eye surgery in a week for a detached retina but the prognosis following that surgery, after the first surgery failed, was okay. I now had a gas bubble in my eye, which would have to be surgically removed later, instead of a gas bubble which would have just dissipated eventually if that surgery had been successful.
The surgeon said the repair of the three tears in the superior region of the retina, the subject of the first surgery, were pretty set now, and the subsequently deteriorating bottom of the retina in the inferior region, the subject of the second surgery, was still adhering although it was still "wet" (not yet adhering although still in place). He set the next check-up for two months away.
I couldn't lift anything over 5 pounds for weeks if not months, or do anything that would induce strain including sneezing much less scrubbing a sink basin or a floor or pulling up weeds in the yard. Try living alone and see how that goes as the weeks turn into a month or more.
The weeks of recovery started to drone on. My eye hurt sometimes, and gave me occasional sudden pangs of pain, and it itched maddeningly, and I started feeding my paranoia by reading reports of persons who had this surgery multiple times, a half dozen or more, in the hope of it taking.
The surgeon said the repair of the three tears in the superior region of the retina, the subject of the first surgery, were pretty set now, and the subsequently deteriorating bottom of the retina in the inferior region, the subject of the second surgery, was still adhering although it was still "wet" (not yet adhering although still in place). He set the next check-up for two months away.
I couldn't lift anything over 5 pounds for weeks if not months, or do anything that would induce strain including sneezing much less scrubbing a sink basin or a floor or pulling up weeds in the yard. Try living alone and see how that goes as the weeks turn into a month or more.
The weeks of recovery started to drone on. My eye hurt sometimes, and gave me occasional sudden pangs of pain, and it itched maddeningly, and I started feeding my paranoia by reading reports of persons who had this surgery multiple times, a half dozen or more, in the hope of it taking.
Saturday, September 1, 2018
A long week
After my eye operation, I was shut up for a week in a friend's apartment (no stairs) where she made me meals while I lay around trying to keep my head parallel to the floor for fourteen hours a day. It was exhausting work. Anyone who has ever had intrusive eye surgery or cared for someone who did knows exactly what I'm talking about.
Apparently I didn't do it well. Or maybe the operation didn't go well. It's hard to tell, and it's water under the bridge, it ain't comin' back again.
I listened to The House of Seven Gables by Nathaniel Hawthorne on tape. I have no idea what went on in that book as characters came and went confusingly over the generations but there was at least one very bad man in it, or perhaps several, and justified revenge was exacted. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, which I had read previously a long time ago in ninth grade, went down easier because the action was more straightforward and there was one very good man, or perhaps several, in it although no justice was achieved.
Towards the end of my week in a coma I did take two walks outside for about 20 minutes each, delighting in handling cool packages of cold cuts in a store I stumbled around in for a few minutes. I tried to use Apple Pay, newly installed in the "wallet" on my new I-phone, to pay for some pasta but I was incapable of successfully negotiating that transaction and paid with cash as the people on line behind me started staring hard at me as the bumbling minute turned into three or four minutes lost forever to all of us. At the end of the week I went back home for the night, halfway back to the Kaiser Permanente facility in Northern Virginia where the surgery a week before had been performed, so I could present myself the next morning for my one week eye exam.
Apparently I didn't do it well. Or maybe the operation didn't go well. It's hard to tell, and it's water under the bridge, it ain't comin' back again.
I listened to The House of Seven Gables by Nathaniel Hawthorne on tape. I have no idea what went on in that book as characters came and went confusingly over the generations but there was at least one very bad man in it, or perhaps several, and justified revenge was exacted. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, which I had read previously a long time ago in ninth grade, went down easier because the action was more straightforward and there was one very good man, or perhaps several, in it although no justice was achieved.
Saturday, August 25, 2018
It hurt
By Tuesday morning I already knew I had retinal detachment, as I had consulted Dr. Google. But it was worse, I had three tears in the superior region of the retina which was ruining my vision, probably permanently. There's no telling why it occurred.
I was scheduled for surgery that very afternoon and whisked off to the pre-surgery ward and given that famous surgical open-in-the-back garb in the doctor's hope that a surgical window would open sooner. "Who's going to come pick you up after surgery," I was asked.
I frantically made calls and imposed myself upon a good friend, who left work, stayed with me and took me home afterwards. She is a true friend and if my sight in that eye is saved, she will be responsible for that. I spent a restless night as my eye was taped shut and it hurt.
My recovery instructions were to keep my head parallel to the floor 12-14 hours a day for two weeks, then very sedate physical activity for six weeks, and no strenuous physical activity for four months in the hope the repair would take permanently upon the delicate structure of the eye. Try keeping your head very parallel to the floor for 12-14 hours, then extend that for 13 more straight days.
I was scheduled for surgery that very afternoon and whisked off to the pre-surgery ward and given that famous surgical open-in-the-back garb in the doctor's hope that a surgical window would open sooner. "Who's going to come pick you up after surgery," I was asked.
I frantically made calls and imposed myself upon a good friend, who left work, stayed with me and took me home afterwards. She is a true friend and if my sight in that eye is saved, she will be responsible for that. I spent a restless night as my eye was taped shut and it hurt.
My recovery instructions were to keep my head parallel to the floor 12-14 hours a day for two weeks, then very sedate physical activity for six weeks, and no strenuous physical activity for four months in the hope the repair would take permanently upon the delicate structure of the eye. Try keeping your head very parallel to the floor for 12-14 hours, then extend that for 13 more straight days.
Friday, August 24, 2018
He'll see you tomorrow
Bad things always seem to happen on weekends when the co-pay is double. A black spot had inexplicably developed in one eye.
I called my health-care provider and was given an appointment with an eye doctor for Wednesday. It didn't hurt, and I pretended that my vision was returning to normal.
On Monday I realized my vision definitely wasn't improving, it was getting worse. I called my health-care service again and said I couldn't wait until Wednesday, that I was losing my sight.
I was given an appointment on the morrow with an ophthalmologist, not an optometrist as formerly scheduled. Most ominously the advice nurse shortly called me back and advised me not to eat or drink anything after midnight.
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
Don't be alone
My last post, last month, was about the big corporations beating down the common man (or woman) because we don't matter in current Amerika. My attitude hasn't changed.
But a health issue interposed. I'm losing my sight.
A detached retina in my dominant eye (three tears in the superior region) caused me to lose 3/4 of my sight in a day in that eye. The ophthalmologist operated that very day, upon my right eye, and it hurt a lot.
The surgery failed because a week later I was in the OR for surgery number two, upon that eye, an hour after I went for my one-week check-up. I live alone and couldn't even have had these sight-saving surgeries unless I had someone to pick me up immediately afterwards (ALL surgeries are outpatient these days) who would take me home and ensconce me in bed to begin the weeks-long arduous recovery from eye surgery.
But a health issue interposed. I'm losing my sight.
A detached retina in my dominant eye (three tears in the superior region) caused me to lose 3/4 of my sight in a day in that eye. The ophthalmologist operated that very day, upon my right eye, and it hurt a lot.
The surgery failed because a week later I was in the OR for surgery number two, upon that eye, an hour after I went for my one-week check-up. I live alone and couldn't even have had these sight-saving surgeries unless I had someone to pick me up immediately afterwards (ALL surgeries are outpatient these days) who would take me home and ensconce me in bed to begin the weeks-long arduous recovery from eye surgery.
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