To the Galaxy.

Omg, Big Bang concert. OMG, quite close up. Omg, Daesung was the first to come over to my side, with T.O.P. And OMG, Daesung's live is awesome. Really awesome.

They were spamming English. And Daesung's part was like, "Hello", "What's up", "Hi", "I'm Daesung." He looked like he was enjoying himself flying in the air, like on a enormous swing.

Really lucky to get to watch and such a good view. Don't have to sleep tonight already. Still having withdrawal symptoms. First Korean Concert. So this is how a concert is like.

Although I'm not a VIP, I must really admit that they were get and I had a great time. Screaming and laughing inside me. Had to be professional. But I really enjoyed myself. Although Big Bang is not considered one of my favourite Kpop groups, but they are really great. Daesung is such an amazing vocalist. His voice is strong yet gentle. Awww.. :)

Their stage presence was so good. Taeyang with his groove, T.O.P with his charisma. Every single one of them can hold the stage well. So much to learn from them.

Confidence, groove. Must feel comfortable on stage so people can enjoy watching you. I have to work harder. So much more. But as an individual on stage, I feel so small and I don't feel confidence at all. Still new to performing singing. More used to dancing. But just love singing. So I have to work a lot harder.

Well, this is what idols are supposed to do. Motivate people. Hahha.

I should learn as much as I enjoyed the show.

Didn't feel like doing anything. Tired of watching videos, don't feel like studying.

But singing just makes me happy. ~♫♪♫♪~

I feel surprised when my voice never crack at certain low notes anymore. That note was at my bridge. Seems like I overcame it. But some guys key still too low for me.

Started on a new Korean Drama, titled "Phantom". It's super exciting, my heart beats fast while watching. So thrilling. Hahah, anyway I started watching one of the casts is G.O. LOL! But I'm a little scared to watch. Too scary. Detective show. Hehe. Too exciting. I prefer romance drama lar, like those sad and touching ones.


MBLAQ- We Were Both In Love (Phantom)

It is obvious that in order for people to enjoy watching you performing, you yourself must enjoy the stage. You have to relax and feel the music. It's really hard for me.

Have to hide the nervousness, have to fake confidence.

Emotions, I don't know how to express them. it's really touching when one performs with much emotions and passion.

Really feel like singing, yeah at this unearthly time. Itching to sing since forever. But time for bed.

I need to study tomorrow. Study, sing, watch running man. Need to complete this week's so I can watch idol manager on Monday. Go Go!

I am thinking if I'm allergy to coke. Lol. Did I drink coke on Friday?

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Song to intro!

Don't even know if I am in any position.

Quite sure my Angel is a guy. Haha. The handwriting, the gift itself.

Cos I'm a 'singer', and chocolates are not that good for throat. But nevertheless, I love chocolates! Thank you, Angel! ^.^ But lucky guess that my favourite colour is purple? Don't think anyone in CJ knows. Heh. Perhaps just randomly took a post-it, high possibility. Lol. Oh yeah, I suddenly recalled I wrote about my favourite colour in my return letter to my Angel. And I just remembered saying I like chocolates. So actually my Angel is so thoughtful. Heh. Thanks~

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Seems like nothing will last. Haha. 사랑이 믿지마.
Ends up this way every time. And I don't know what too say anymore. No more words of consolation, no more advice. Because I feel that I'm not in any position for that. And I feel tired as well, even though I'm not involved.
Sometimes I wonder if 看开 is a good thing. Cos I used to be very upset when I made a mistake at work. But recently, I kept thinking that I couldn't do anything also, so just forget it. Don't know if I should have this thought. Less troubles on my mind, but I feel irresponsible..

Don't wanna think about anything now.

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Ignorance is bliss. Sometimes I just hope I don't think that much, that far.

Don't like it when people let their feelings known and affect other people's mood as well. Although I always lose my temper on my mum.

I just hope that people will be a little more considerate.

Random fact: I don't like it when the dishwasher talks to me, hate it when he calls my name. Just don't like. But I can't be rude.

I can't lie. Although sometimes I like to lie in the form of acting, for fun and entertainment. But I can't lie when it comes to serious stuff.

But sometimes pretending not to hear, acting blur and laughing is the best way to resolve an awkward situation.

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For the past few days, I have been thinking whether I should give up on my dream(?). Not sure if this is my dream, but what I like to do. Was thinking if I really want to chase after it.

But all I know now is that.. Even if my mind tells me to forget about it, my heart can never. Wanted to be more practical. But once an announcement is made on an upcoming event/performance opportunity, I get all excited. Give up? I guess I never will. The age, is just a number. I'll dance till the day my body can't take it anymore. I'll sing till the day I completely lose my voice.

I am happy with my life now. Just simple and small-scaled performances. Me, I can't take the big stage. The stage I have now is fulfilling enough for me. I still have to gain a lot more confidence. I will conquer it one day.

But I am really confused and unknown of my future. Really don't want to be an accountant, but it's the course I'm taking. Wondering when I will leave Ippudo. A little sian. But I can't bear to leave my managers and there are too many memories. Kind of like a family somehow too. There is this attachment. I want to go Ippudo Sydney and look for Kohei-san and Gen-san. I really miss them so much. After that Ippudo Seoul and Ippudo TW. But I'll miss Ippudo SG too, Fujibe-san and Karen-san.

I'm tired, too.

Giving support and not getting any in return is a really horrible feeling. Okay, depends on situations and their mood, sometimes I get help. But during really busy time, I realised, only a few are there to support me. What made me upset was that they do not observe, what others are doing. I try to help, but sometimes no one is there for me. And thanks so much for shouting my name so loudly when I was not available. Just made my mood bad. But after break, back to the happy me.

I was shocked that Ravi was the one who helped me with Ramen when I was busy attending. Never judge a book by its cover, true that. It is the heart, rather than the ability. But I can see them improving a lot. Jacques, Ravi. They will make a great team actually. They do not stand alone.

Tone matters a lot to me. The incorrect use of tone can send my mood to the lowest.

Really, be grateful. Don't take me for granted.

I know it's my job. I know I have to do everything. But as a ramen runner in such a busy time, I really tried my best to prioritise. Sometimes, I just need that little bit of help.

Jacques asked me, "You not tired meh?" My reply was, "Tired lar, I'm very thirsty." I haven't even had a single drop of water. Non-stop orders, seriously.

Feels tired from all the shouting and thoughts of not receiving enough help.

Yeah, actually I should appreciate everyone too. I miss CJ a lot.

Okay, sleep and tomorrow will be one better day!