My 30th March opened with rising exceptionally early (around 630am) to help with my uncle's wedding. It was very tiring ! I can only imagine how the bride and groom feel running around. And my mother was just.... giving too many instructions. I don't ever want to get married. Lols.


The middle portion of the day was a blast :DDDD Met up with jq, aggie and gpt to catch WE WILL ROCK YOU :D AHHHHHH QUEEN SONGS ARE DA BOMB :D It was semi-rock concert ish cos towards the end people just got up and started dancing. Hands in the air, waving to We Are The Champions and \m/ (rock) signs aplenty during We Will Rock You ! And ahhhhh Bohemian Rhapsody (: (: (: Aggie and I were going (radio) ga ga over it. HAHAHA. The lead is apparently the third place winner from the reality show to find the frontman for INXS. He has really snazzy dance moves AND he looks hot in skinny pants. Haha.. I read up online just now about him and he's like 38 ?! And still rocking out as if he's 25 ! Lols.. Discovered some (slightly) lesser known hits too.. Hammer to Fall, Another One Bites the Dust, Killer Queen, Under Pressure... I'm sad they didn't do Princes of the Universe and The Show Must Go On too (though that song was playing on the radio after the wedding dinner ! cool eh..).. Ahhhh, gpt bought the shirt and I'm tempted to buy one too (through mich, sally or xunny =/) and watch it again ! Haha ! Madness right.. I'm also very inspired to attempt to arrange a medley. Or maybe just Bohemian Rhapsody, lols. Yes yes, money well spent ! WOOOOTS \m/ !!!



Another one bites the dust.

I forgot to mention that on friday, because I walked xunny home and missed three number 83 buses, I ended up walking home from compasspoint. Using the 83 bus route. Lols.

My 800th post. I'M SO GLAD YOU POPPED BY JEMAMA XMM ! :D Am missing all the aussie folks ): Not that I've even seen sally and mich in the last three weeks. ):

HRMS. INTRIGUING. HAHAHA.

Okay, have to be up in about 6 hours. I feel quite disturbed about the whole short term thing. =/ And I tell you, if he joins I am totally going to..be very vulgar for starters. WTHKNNCCB. Lols. The choir will have three very unhappy people.

I like Franz Ferdinand's The Fallen :D But I have a feeling the lyrics are blasphemous ?? =/



What's wrong with a little destruction ?

Bitch.
I'm upset. But I'm so glad that joel was being bitchy about it for me. He's so nice, it's such a pity he's gay. Lols. Dammit everyone is gay, haha.

The only perk of my 2224 tutorial is the rather cute teaching assistant from china. But he didn't come today, ho hum.

Please please wish me luck for gamelan. Crosses fingers. Can't wait for sunday ! (:

At last count, aziah, aisha and jacqueline were at the concert. ))): SO SAD. The only consolation I have is the really HAWWWT picture of adam in Life! today. Am going to cut it out, lols. I think tattoos are quite hot. Unless they're hideous, greenish dragon ones. =X

And Adam is probably the only guy I wouldn't mind in skinny jeans. Yum.

Sorry, I'm just very caught up with not going for the concert. Will be for a few more days or so. Whines.

Buzz. I've been slacking a lot since I submitted geography. (haha not that I don't slack around enough already) Rah ! Need to start on 2224 stuff and gamelan practice. Rawr. Am looking forward to sunday though ! (: MAMMA MIA LET ME GO ! QUEEEEEEN !

In other news,

I AM VERY VERY SAD BECAUSE I DIDN'T GET TO SEE MAROON 5 IN CONCERT AND I DIDN'T EVEN BUMP INTO ADAM LEVINE ON THE STREET OR ANYTHING !!! ))): MONEY CAN BE EARNED BUT EXPERIENCES CAN'T !!!!! ARGHHHH !!!! ))))):

Do you know how many people have told me that my display picture of adam is so hot ? I think so too ayesshhhh !

We should totally hold a get together where we sit in a circle, play their songs and weep silently. I know xunny and mich will so agree with me. SADNESS.

Okay this is real bad. I'm done watching up till episode 6 season 7 of scrubs and I just discovered Project Runway 4 ! AHHHHHHHHH ! Have watched three episodes already. Gosh, I could go on all night with the really pretty heidi klum and tim make it work gunn. And why are all the men gay !?!?!?!? =/ Fortunately all I need to do is spend just around 2 hours editing my j1 and j2. Phew. And it kinda sucks that I don't have many concepts on hand, rah.

+++

It's past midnight now and I'm done with my deadlines at least for about half a week. WOOOTS :) And the only straight guy on project runway is quite cool. Apart from his beard. =/ But I think tattoos are rather manly. Haha, I prefer manly men. Metro is just a no, lols..

I learnt how to play Risk at renny's place on friday ! :D It's quite interesting except that with six players it's kinda slow and it got a bit draggy after a while. But still ! We can play it again ! Hopefully with more girls, haha. And I LOVE renny's place ! The guest bedrooom conceals the entrance to the attic which is this totally cool, cozy nook with a slanted ceiling and complete with sleepover pillows and an all too steep staircase. SO COOL AYES !!! Anyway, it was quite an interesting gathering though it was a very slow start. Had fun playing some cutesy drum game on hrk's ds. We shall meet again soon.. (probably after exams, lols)

Red red rose and Double double are coming together quite nicely. Still needs a lot of work and confidence but we're getting there ! There's also the need to integrate the new singers once the italy people get back. But at least it's not very stressful mmms. We worked on the banner after lunch and I tell you, it's a good pretty idea but tis a LOT of work ! Can't wait to see how it turns out though..

Napped from 5ish till 9 and my body clock's pretty much warped. But I'm still tired. =/ I don't know, I think it comes with sleeping too much. But I have J1 and J2 to complete by monday night and I have choir and a 2224 meeting on monday. ARGH.

I am not a fan of sms-ing and it really is quite a chore to organise things. Especially when other people don't take initiative.

It's depressing because I've been hearing maroon 5 on the radio, outside, on itunes shuffle and IT IS SAD BECAUSE I CAN'T WATCH THEM ON TUESDAY !!! :((((( I'm quite a fan actually ! Okay, nowhere near hardcore but good enough to want to watch them live ! Bah. I must so catch elton john in concert ! Thank God he's performing the day I finish my papers.. But tickets are horrendously expensive. ): I really need a job.

Belle & Sebastian's this really quirky scottish band. Their tunes are cute and so is their lead vocalist. (: Go listen to The Blues Are Still Blue and White Collar Boy.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=U_wJTeKeY_I&feature=related

Interest in aqm is waning. =/ Hrm. Interest has been piqued in other areas. But I'm not sure, lols. And oh, it's interesting because even after so long and the bad blood, someone still manages to be..interesting. I don't know either, hrm.

Looks like tomorrow and monday are going to be very long days.. But I got myself pretty and cheap backless loafers (:

I realise I haven't updated about ajchoir yet but..
MAMMA MIA AJCHOIR PWNZZZZZ !!!
Category winner, Grand prize winner and Audience prize !
WOOOTS :D Am so proud of them

:D I've been wanting to do this for a long time. And I'm pretty darn pleased with the end result ! The greatest problem was the eyes. This is the best I could do haha. ((:

Too tired and lazy. And upset. A little.

Am supposed to be working on geog but am creating a modified, mini lichtenstein. Doing the ben day dots is NO JOKE. Head spinning, lols. Okay, shall cross my fingers and hope I don't oversleep !

At this point I need sugar. Or caffeine. Because I need to do my essay and I'm falling asleep.
Or maybe I just need sleep. Haha, didn't take a nap today.

I hope NAC calls me next week. I really need a job to earn some moolah over the hols. I should really be the manager of gwei's foray into the baking business ! HURHUR. Commission coughs. And I made vanilla bread pudding today ! But it kind of was overshadowed by my mother's birthday cake and the hokkien mee and satay she brought back. =/ Sigh.

Crap. Eyes are closing and I have 300 words to go. Assuming I complete this before 2 tomorrow, I'll have about 3 hours or so to work on the soci assignment 2 then it's the ethnography assignment at night. Project and assignment and I really really want to squeeze in the geog project before friday evening so I can enjoy myself at the class gathering and on saturday. Then saturday, sunday and monday will be reserved for j1 & j2 and a little 2224. Aiks. Assignments APLENTY till just a bit before exams. After tuesday I'll have a week of rest (but full of gamelan practising) and then it'll be 2221 and 2224, rawr.

I'm not attending lectures at all this week. Ho hum. Okay, I hope I'm not late for class tomorrow.
AND THREADLESS SALES ARE BLOODY BAD FOR THE POCKET !!!!




Plus AJCHOIR's in the GRAND FINALS !!! They're 7 hours behind and I am awaiting good news (: I am sooooo envious of them. Not because they're get to compete in another round but because they're in Italy, duh. Dammit, I can't believe I didn't make the best of my time in prague and helsinki. Sigh. Regrets.

0232 hours: YAY ! I am left with my conclusion and generally solidifying the essay. Plus references. Ick. What would I do without dictionary.com and thesaurus.com mans !

After leading his audience to a climax of expectation he cannot sustain the illusion and gloomily concludes—

"That’s how it is on this bitch of the earth."

-Michael Robinson, on Lucky's speech in Waiting for Godot


Oh so true. And school has become that much more screwy because I now have to make some pretty major changes to the geog project. Why didn't she tell me earlier after she read it ?!?!??!?!?! Did she have to wait what, two weeks to burst the bubble ?!?! Wtf.

I am so little miss biatched up right now.

Am going to stay at home tomorrow to write my lit essay. Ayes, I'm actually looking forward to friday to enjoy myself.

Great, just great. Just when I thought I could kick back and celebrate with making bread pudding and laughing at michael scott I am reminded (by my trusty planner) that I have a lit essay due thursday. Not only that, qua called to say that we're not getting our soci project extension. Sooooooooo.. Lit essay thursday, ethnography thing friday, assignment two friday. Right. My head is spinning as I type this. I do not kid you. And just as I thought my nightmares were over as I turned the bloody 4 page load of nonsense in. ARGH. And I'll be having nightmares.. till the end of the term. Cos after this friday there's J1 and J2 to work on and then 2224 project and the 2221 essay and the 2224 essay and the playing test and the 2224 presentation and then FINALLY READINGS and then studying for finals and omgaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhd the work doesn't end.


Okay. Throbbing headache. I want to sleep. Oh dear. It was such a mistake to take lit. 11/29 is not comforting at all. Plus I have a feeling I cannot commit to the friday acappella group. Schoolwork and two choirs and a semblance of a social life (I THINK) does not leave much time for sanity. Much less more singing as much as it is fun. ): HOWWWW. Sigh.

But thanks to yuklum and dearsenior and qua mmms (:

It's been a loooooooong time since I've felt depressed about school work. And not just the sheer quantity of work but WHAT THE FRICKING MIDTERM IS EXPECTING OF ME ! ARGH. I've never felt so clueless about work before. I mean even 3 years ago I could play with numbers and apply formulae to maths and all but wth's with all these damn theories !? And it doesn't help that criticisms are not covered in the lecture !!! Am very upset. And woohoo great, it has to coincide with my period. The time of the month where all I want to do is lie down and vegetate all day.

Not only does it suck to not know how to start and what to write but it sucks equally to churn out utterly unconvincing crap that you yourself don't even understand. Plus I'm just using lotsa different adjectives and literally going around in circles (spinning BLINDLY for that matter) so that I can exceed 1100 words.


)))))))): Majorly depressed. Am planning to celebrate the end of the funk by making bread pudding. For now, I don't want to take any more soci modules. And I am not liking that asian boy.

I am quite utterly clueless. Sigh. )': I'd much rather be in Italy right now.

Yeah, maybe this really is a sign that I should hang out with people my own age eh.. Or at least, my own mental age. I don't know.

I miss pten. Sally, xunny, qua, graces, mich, jema and kiki. Girlfriends are the best.

So yes, this suspiciously feels like a repeat of something. Except in a somewhat different context. Did I see it coming ? Like all previous times, no not really. Although the whole underrated and unappreciated concept is nothing new to me. Plus the fact that I've been known to think too much and be a drama queen.

And when I am upset, I am a vengeful person. It's a horrible feeling but so is being hurt to begin with. Argh. And I only feel partially bad for feeling smug that someone's results weren't stellar and he probably can't do law. Hah. Cockiness and stupidity.

Anyway.. WHAT IS NEW ? Grim smile. Thanks to gwei, aggie and colin for listening though. (:

I just read somewhere that Waiting for Godot can be interpreted as speaking about waiting, bracketed by birth and death. Which essentially is life. Life itself. Meanings, existence, being.. Questioning the state of oneself and one's reality. Thus the need to detach the characters from any setting that can be perceived as reality. The tree is probably the only link to a concrete world they may know. And right now I can only think of two functions it serves. One, as I've read online, is as an instrument of committing suicide. The physical existence of and in the world, that is one's body. Both vladimir and estragon contemplate suicide twice. But it never happens eventually which I'm thinking may signify that only God can decide when one dies. And dying not only in the physical sense but of the mind and soul as well. The tree's second function methinks is as a marker of time. Again as an image (is this the right lit word to use ? =X), its sprouting of leaves in the second act serves as a marker of time which is actually quite a human construct. I agree with pozzo that the blind have no notion of time. Which, thinking about it now, may actually allude to how the 'blind' may refer to people who do not believe in God. By saying that they have no notion of time may be an allusion to how they do not grasp the enormity of how they will be damned for all eternity without faith. Vladimir refutes this and thinks it is the opposite. That it is the blind that understand it best. I think he might be saying that those who have been saved have no need for the concept of 'human time' or reality (ie. the time of life on earth) because of everlasting life.

I think I might be going too far ? Lols.

The setting itself is surreal and effort is made to remove it from reality. Which creates this void of context. I suppose it makes it even more general, two men pondering life. The physical concept of time is also removed. The two men are unsure of what time it is, how long has passed, how many times they've met, concepts of yesterday today and tomorrow.. It's further reinforced by the poor memories of estragon and pozzo and the doubt vladimir has when he questions the boy about being the same boy. There is a sense of being lost. And all this because they are waiting for Godot.

Which brings me to my next point that I've inferred that existence and meaning can only be derived from God. I'm not too sure if it's Beckett's intention but there are many curious references to Christianity. The strange, elusive, non-appearing, name of the person Godot himself. The person around which gogo and didi surround so much importance. They carry out mundane activities, think about what it means to exist, try to distract themselves numerous times all whilst waiting for Godot. And the funny thing is, neither know who Godot is or what his deal is. All they understand is that they must wait. Understanding will come when Godot does. Plus the numerous references ? Cain and Abel.. (I'm not too sure of that story itself.. The brothers is it ?) More significantly, the two thieves that are crucified with Jesus. According to wikipedia, there is this subtle implication that only one of the two men will be saved when Godot arrives just as how only one thief is saved in the end. Vladimir argues this in the beginning that only one of the four parables mentions this.. I think it's more likely that in the context of the story, it is vladimir ? Between both men, he represents the mind and soul. Estragon is constantly preoccupied with physical things like pain and eating (and he's just whining a lot of the time) and represents the body, something that we'll leave behind eventually when we die and meet our maker.

Anyway yes, to me the play is about life and existence. Which essentially, for a christian, is about waiting for God. And it kind of all fits because the characters are tied to this Godot (they acknowledge this) that is presented as this being that will create meaning. The circular structure of the play teaches us that he is never going to be there physically and yet he is awesome and omnipresent and able to have great bearings of the lives of the two men.

Okay what started off as an innocent post about an interesting quote I found some text analysis site turned into a ramble of my perception of the book. Wow. Hurhur, and to think that there can be so much to be said about a play about nothingness.

'The theme of despair
Becketts's play then deals with this kind of life; it deals with man who continues existing because he happens to exist. But it deals with this theme in a manner, which is different from all previous treatments of despair in literature. The attitude of the traditional desperate character might be stated thus: "I have no more to expect; therefore I shall not remain". Eastragon and Vladimir, on the other hand, represent an Inversion of this formula. They seem to say: "We remain; therefore we must be waiting for something. We are waiting; therefore there must be something we are waiting for."'

The italics are pretty much what I'm trying to say about what the book is saying about life and the after life. The characters don't die. They continue to wait. Vladimir especially, with the better memory, somehow acknowledges the possibility of the futility of waiting but he continues to do so anyway. Because he knows that all will be understood and hence worth waiting for when Godot arrives. This is further supported by how the characters continuously assert that they are leaving (estragon, as the 'body' of the two; perhaps the weariness of the flesh ?) but they never do. Quite simply, both acts end with

Estragon: Well, shall we go?
Vladimir: Yes, let's go.

They do not leave.

Which I find is of great significance. Mmmms.. I'm still trying to figure out the meaning behind the many silences as instructed by beckett. Literary device to maybe demonstrate the weight of the speaker's words ? But a lot of the phrases are so random. :/

Oh yes, and the constant reminders that didi has to give gogo. That they are waiting waiting waiting for Godot. This further supports the mind/soul and body thing. Persuading the body to persist in existing.

***

Am going to veer into some frivolity now. Was yahoo-ing (am I the only one who believes in old fashioned yahoo-ing and doesn't google ? hrms) for recipes for bread pudding and baked rice ! Mmm (: I feel hungry thinking about it. And I might try curry flavoured croquettes. This cooking craze is probably not going to last long and it is in light of my successful nutella and almond crepes ! Haha.. I was looking through instyle today and there's always gorgeous stuff inside. Gowns and summer dresses that I waaaaaaannt. Bah. I really need a job come this hols..

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

-Dylan Thomas

***

I am too tired to talk about my fantastic and in retrospect, actually not so fantastic thursday. Hurhur. I'm just proud of myself today. Many thanks with JT with regards to the concepts ! She's the only one doing the readings, haha. Managed to complete it in just two hours with the help of our discussion yesterday. (: Monumental for me cos I take forever to gather and organise my thoughts.

Okay things to do. Read Godot, study for 2221 theory test, read soci textbook, START GEOG READINGS OMG. Lols.

Well.

The lit test wasn't easy. Mostly because 20+ questions were on POETRY. And they asked technical stuff like forms and blah. Sigh. But THANK GOD I woke up on time. I had my first lit lecture ever and I think prof rich*ardson is fun (: I hope I wake up for future lectures !

SE2221 and SC1101E continue to interest me. Except sometimes I can't hear dr mr*azek and he speaks quite fast. Oh, and I have another 2221 theory test next week. Sigh. ): More things to do. And I have no time mainly because of the extensive fieldwork that I have to carry out.

I shouldn't really complain seeing as how I didn't go with the group last friday but seriously, they were not very thorough. They didn't ask conduct interviews. Ayes, had I gone for the 2nd tutorial we would be more prepared. SighzZzZz.

I felt really hungry just now so... I made crepes using a videojug recipe ! Only problem is, I want to eat something savoury but I have no fillings ! Hahah.

Near zero aqm propinquity. Sigh.

I need more time and favourable weather for fieldwork ! Rah. I feel like traveling. And I feel like eating dimsum. (how about before you guys fly off next week ? :D)

I spent most of my journeys today reading Alexander Pope's The Rape of the Lock. Which has 5 cantos. And each canto has around 120 lines. And almost every line makes some reference to greek myth and fantasy and related cheem stuff. Some parts are interesting and it can be quite comical..

Anyhoo, it's quite funny on my part because the footnotes kept referring to Pope and blah blah and I thought all along throughout my reading that they meant THE POPE. (ie. the Catholic guy !!!) Omg, I can be so blonde sometimes. Lols, I just wasn't paying attention.

I'm torn between reading my notes (which would mean to risk oversleeping and missing the test altogether) and going to sleep now. But I might oversleep anyway. Right. BLAH. Thank God and the heavens and all the goodness in the world that it is an mcq test. Though it may very well be a hard one. But at least the odds against me are lower as compared to an open ended test. And I've only read, no SKIMMED THROUGH about a third of the poems. Wunderbar.

Regrets I've had a few.
EN1101E with the 8 bloody AM lecture is one of them.

I'm not sure if my interest is waning. Sigh. It probably is a good thing that I have SO MUCH to do in the weeks leading up to the exams. Okay, HAHAHA I'M REGRETTING I SAID THAT ALREADY. I have to read Godot before my presentation next week. I have to revise my soci essay for this friday. I have to conduct fieldwork BY MY LONESOME for ge2224. I have to work on my portion of the 2218 essay by friday. On top of that, I have my whole ass load of untouched readings. And on top of THAT, I have two choirs and one acappella group to juggle.

All that and more awaits once I get through THE DARN LIT TEST.
Wish me luck.

As flies to wanton boys are we to th' gods;
They kill us for their sport.

As spoken in resignation by Gloucester. It's interesting because both the good and wicked eventually perish. So maybe yes, humanity may just be pawns in the cruel fingers of fate. At least for King Lear and his posse. =/

***

Wonderful weather for sleeping in. And a million poems to digest before 8am tomorrow. Wonderful. It'd actually be possible if it weren't for the fact that I don't understand anything. Hurrah.

Am lazy and tired so I shall let pictures tell the tale of my wonderful morning out on sunday. Where I was forced to wake up at 645 and make sandwiches. And I was still semi-late. Thank goodness for gpt's dad !

Innocence under the brollies. (:

How bright am I ? Hurhur.

My favourite slut and bitch.

Posing with our poser gear.

The mandatory jumpshot of course.

Colour accent is fun ! Bananas :D

Gwei's attempt at making us look more girly..

Sitting pretty on the cool branch

Having fun at the Apple store with the IMac photobooth function !


***

I need divine intervention for lit really. Thank goodness it's mcq. Okay, the mugging and chionging for projects really has to start soon ! Bah.

This is almost gettyimages worthy. (: I can't believe I'm going there for a real picnic. I hope the weather's good and that I don't oversleep !

***

My first alumni prac today and it was quite an interesting and different experience I must say. I think it's not bad, we at least get stuff done. Even though yuklum is so playful. Hahah, okay but she entertains me with gossip.. The songs are really nice ! (: But I suppose quite a challenge considering the current strength. But singing is almost always fun so yeah, I hope I can cope with impending tests and projects !

Rah. Flaps arms. I should be more concerned with lit. And the 5000 odd poems I need to read. And waking up on wednesday. GAHHHHH. Regrets, I've had a few. Oh and I'm so enamoured with Point of No Return, Prima Donna and Angel of Music. The lesser known POTO pieces..



The final threshold.
The bridge is crossed so stand and watch it burn.

Ooh, my last post was my 777th post. Aiks, I don't think I got a leap year post. ):

Anyhoo, my day was pretty uneventful because the eventful plans we had had to be cancelled. ): When it will happen, I really have no idea. Maybe june. HAHA. The most happening thing about today was crystal jade with xunny and sally ! (mich had to study, sigh :( ) Yayy ! Even though they were really late, I really enjoyed the yummy dinner (:

***

Okay, I took gwei's advice and was so nervous I immediately went to the living room to play the piano. Which explains why at 0123hrs I am plonking Masquerade from Phantom of the Opera. =X

Short and sweet enough for me. HAHA. Right, we're never going to go beyond talking about choir related stuff.

***

Was just thinking about what I was doing the last leap year. Four years ago. So many things have happened since then. So many things about me have changed since then. I feel old but when I listen to the Corrs' 'So Young' (which incidentally was played on my last day in aj) I feel as if there are tons of things I've yet to do and I am really at an age where I have to go crazy and try everything and all.. Okay, everything except riding rollercoasters and visiting Changi hospital. =X