Hey, are you lonely?
Has summer gone so slowly?
We found the ground
And that damage was done
It's cold as you fade into the sun
Where'd you go? To me?

But you're alive!
Well, it's only
Fallen frames, they told me
You stand out, it's so loud
And so what if it is?
It's cold as you face into the wind
Where'd it go to? tonight the sun shall see its light

So what if you catch me,
Where would we land?
In somebody's life
For taking his hands
Sing to me hope as she's
Thrown on the sand
All of our work
Is rated again
Where to go ?

And you were somehow the rain this thing could allow
could try
But it's all wrong
You're so strong
And this life and work
And choice took far too long
Where'd it go? tonight the sun shall see its light

So what if you catch me,
Where would we land?
In somebody's life
For taking his hands
Sing to me hope as she's
Thrown on the sand
All of our work
Is rated again

When I was sure you'd follow through
My world was turned to blue so thin
When you'd hide your songs would die
So I'd hide yours with mine
And all my words were bound to fail
I know you won't fail
See, I can tell

Remy Zero's Fair. Tired so am going to be random. I don't like coffee but I like cappuchino cookies. Everytime I finish using the bathroom, I'll automatically reach out to turn the lights off even though it may be morning without the lights even on in the first place. It's weird, shrugs. I met graces just now. (: Watched the match from the second half onwards. Ayes, lame. Maybe it was a good thing I didn't go. Am two thirds through sputnik sweetheart and already I want to borrow another murakami. Another ha jin won't hurt either. My pay will only come in on the 20th of feb. Wonderful. Bah.

'Did you ever see anyone shot by a gun without bleeding ?

That's gotta be one of the principles behind reality. Accepting things that are hard to comprehend, and leaving them that way. And bleeding. Shooting and bleeding.

I'll cross the bridge when the time comes. Blood must be shed. I'll sharpen my knife, ready to slit a dog's throat somewhere.'
-Sputnik Sweetheart, Haruki Murakami

Blood must be shed. How true. It's only when we bleed that we know we're alive. (oh, I got a papercut, sorta, today. that's how random I'm being) Despite the not bad environment and people and all, I have half a mind to quit and ask ocm whether he still needs me to relief whilst waitressing as well. But I was asked to discuss a contract. Oh rahhhh. And guilt will gnaw at my conscience.

I am not usually one to be ahem, thick skinned and calculative but yl and her gang owes me a present. =X You won't be able to imagine the amount I spent on birthday presents just because I am afiliated to them. Yl, yt, lala, tc, frankie, shaun, mark. All their gifts. Only poor hq was forgotten, (by me at least), unintentionally. Zx too. =X Hmph.

Meh, will be meeting 4/7 stalkers tomorrow yayyy. Broke broke. Haha, am forever engaged in the waiting game. Talk about painful. Almost one in the morning. We'll see how it goes..

jhf g.aygglrgujg l.fj gag ghrhg aljfbmh vb;LF AEIhd

Excuses, excuses. Bel, stop it. I had an enlightening chat with sooks. WE ARE MEETING ON MONDAY YAYYYYYNESS ! Finally, (:

Have you got it in you ?

That's a song from Imogen Heap. Heh, I met WUNDERFUL people today. I love the girls :D We're meeting again !

I didn't know the finals was going to be today. ): And we can't get tickets also. And and, I already made plans. Blardy lah, why didn't they publicise it ? Did they have so little faith for sgp to make it to the finals ? Lols.

Too tired for a proper entry. It's tiring and money sapping but I love meeting people I love after work. (: Things to look forward to.

I hate it when people evade my questions or ignore me. I'm sorry. It's fvcking rude, thanks. Maybe if you're just another face on the street, another acquaintance, I wouldn't mind so much. But a lot of people are not. Unless I am to them. Oh dammit, growls.

This is quite random but interesting nonetheless. To quote sooks, without trust there can be no love. Trust eh ? Aahahha. And who said we're talking about love ? Lols. Rawrr, emo to the core. Hahaha. And bored with work. Bleagh. Am being resolute, meow.

ABENDMUSIKEN
(translates to 'evening music')
by Amadeus Choral Society
(featuring charlene tan, malcolm see, chen dingjie, koo yuklum and yours truly from ajchoir)
will be singing
MEMBRA JESU NOSTRI
by DIETERICH BUXTEHUDE
2 MAR 2007
FRIDAY, 8 PM
KAMPONG KAPOR METHODIST CHURCH
(in Little India, close to Mustafa)
FREE ADMISSION
(but a freewill offering will be taken after the concert to defray costs... hopefully $15 :D)

***

It's not a conventional sacred music concert either. There'll be arias and solos and strings and organs (pig's liver ? haha) and a lute. And us, the chorus of course. But the fact that there's accompaniment is wayy cool. It's technically free of charge also (though you may have to pay with your conscience later on, haha). And we're conducted by the legendary Zachariah GT Chai ! He's one cool dude. (: I hope people partake in our sharing of a little musica sacra love. :D

Okay slin just reminded me of the lower sec, outshine days. The pad waving, the 'how dare you shee me!' woman and tan seh poh spitting (him and his microphone and sweets ! lolssss). WAHAHAHA those were the days, lols. Miss Jou too oh mans, we were terrified. We were so diverse, with different cliques and all. The badminton in class during recess. My home econs/english rep days. Ahhhh.. Life was so much simpler then.. There was also lohhengsin with her hush puppies socks and sandals (!KUNG bushmen, lols her emphasis on certain words) And there was nagaraja with her highlighting. -___- Limhweebin and her giggling and the one time she screamed at josephine. Lizah (and some obsessed pink note person COUGHS) and vivienkoh (when I topped the level in geography haha) and yeo (who made ethel, nishan and I stand at the back of the class when we were surfing soccer instead of researching on electricity). Omg, there's too much, lols. In spite of it all, I LOVE CEDAR. :D Truly blue. Always a Cedarian. (:

Am reading murakami's Sputnik Sweetheart. Just started. I have a great boss, she gave me a lift. (: I think one of the parents is quite cute, this malay guy. =X Haha, but I hope I'll find eye candy when I enter the U. If I even make it that is. That's another worry for another time.

I want to shop at thisfashion, lols. Db ! Let's go to the PS one. Hurhur I can't believe chinese new year is less than three weeks away. Which makes buxtehude about a month away (read, 4 practices to shape things up). Which also means that the choir camp is in about a month and a half ? And by then, I'd know whether I'll qualify for the local U. Damn. Lols, who said I don't plan ahead ?

All your wounds are buttersore.

I like the word. I think it's that word. Buttersore. OK Go's Get Over It. Courtesy of tannnng. (: That was erm, sec 3? Haha. Okays, if this void continues, I'll probably be emo ad infinitum. LOLS. It can't be me all the time. ): I hope they play the finals (at least one of the legs) in the national stadium. Aloy, you asked this time, don't ditch me ! Paycheck, paycheck. I want the nice goldish dogtag from j8. And bling from diva. If not for the expensive project, crazy transport fare and potential sentosa outing, I'd go get the dogtag. Rahh, I have a silver one at home though, one of the halves of a gift for a friend. Maybe I should get it engraved. But I am still broke and there's still the other engraving to talk about. HAHAH. Incoherence. Dj is mad. I should sleep, they don't show scrubs on channel 5 anymore. I love disney channel though. Heh.. Till tomorrow..

I think we're getting better with the practices (: We need them anyways. It's hard to find people who really enjoy choral music. And not just the contemporary but musica sacra. Buxtehude, haha. We're talking like, 17th century man ! This dude is ancient. But yeps, frankie is now in shanghai shopping and tmx, yl and I have to go back to work tomorrow. Talk about depressing. =/

My keyboard and mouse are screwy. Stalkers outing has been settled on thursday, still awaiting replies from ruz and ber. But 4/7 so far ain't bad. We can ask trina too, haha. Sentosa outing is still in its planning stages but so far only hrk and renny are more confirmed amongst the guys. Oh wells.

I love the piano and big band in the Chicago OST. (: Zeta Jones rocks too. Her voice is really quite sexy. Haha deep voices are sexy. Cough ronnay and loh cough. =X Ahhh, am thinking about the nice black and white dress from coax. Jq and zx are apparently enjoying ns, lols. Ntu talks next sunday.

You know, I was just thinking about how a friend of a friend said something about how a lot people post lyrics and phrases and quotes in italics, underscoring their significance. And most of the time, they're posted with the intention to communicate something to someone(s). What the 2nd degree friend said was that such authors probably don't have the guts to say things out loud, in person. That brought to mind something. About how we think that over such matters, we have so much to lose. Is there that much at stake in our lives ? Why do we calculate our risks to be so great ? Shouldn't it just be another case of go out, grow up, fall down, get up ? Db made sense. We fail to picture the long term gratification and are instead too focused on the what ifs and maybes of tomorrow. We forget next month, next year. The lesson ? I don't know. Stop supersizing the tragedies of a yet to be romance and grow some guts. Hahahaha.

The Shin's Phantom Limb is not bad as well. Speaking of phantom, I always feel phantom handphone vibrations from my tote. Weird, lols. I'm sorry for the double standards. By not being honest with me, you're inducing more misery. That I've learnt. Help me help you. Or vice versa, whatever. Let me know, I can take it. Heck, even if I can't, I got to learn how to. I've survived it man. Bring it on.

I need to do something about it. We'll see how it pans out over the next week or so yeah ? In the mean time, outings and the draining away of moolah, ahah. Till tomorrow..

Remind me to visit drawerb.com again when limewire is less screwy and I am less tired. I want to download music by the yeah yeah yeahs, regina spektor, journey.. Among others..

Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth.
Only, I don't know how they got out, dear.
Turn me back into the pet that I was when we met.
I was happier then with no mind-set.

And if you'd 'a took to me like
A gull takes to the wind.
Well, I'd 'a jumped from my tree
And I'd a danced like the king of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.

New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries.
Hope it's right when you die, old and bony.
Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall,
Never should have called
But my head's to the wall and I'm lonely.

And if you'd 'a took to me like
A gull takes to the wind.
Well, I'd 'a jumped from my tree
And I'd a danced like the kind of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.

God speed all the bakers at dawn
may they all cut their thumbs,
And bleed into their buns
'till they melt away.
I'm looking in on the good life I might be doomed never to find.
Without a trust or flaming fields am I too dumb to refine?
And if you'd 'a took to me like
Well I'd a danced like the queen of the eyesores
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.


I really love the garden state soundtrack. That was The Shins with New Slang. Am having quite a nice deep conversation with, get this, qy. Haha ! As in, he's a very philosophical, thoughtful person but to engage him in conversation at all is quite a feat. It's quite nervewrecking really, because I don't know him quite well so I can't have a completely no holds barred conversation, haha. But it's cool. He's cool. (:

I watched the mtv for The Fray's How to Save A Life. Ahh, it's quite sad. A thought just occured to me. When do we begin to let our guard down with people ? To betray our guard and share innermost thoughts ? How do we determine the credibility of our friends ? Shared experiences and bonds ? Perhaps. Or maybe you're just seeking for more, trading secrets for friendship. Maybe it's a two way, vice versa thing. Maybe it's not.

Am getting a headache. Bought more new years clothes today. Would've gone on shopping some more if my mother didn't say that she's deducting it all from my pay. PBBFFFT. ): Because of work, weekends are now a very precious commodity. So I try to plan in advance and make time for people near and dear to me. With piano and buxtehude, weeknights are the next best option. But it's tiring. =/

Nope, I don't think everyone can be perfect or even close to all that wonderful. Because everyone has cracks in their plaster that they do try to mask all the time. It's only sometimes you catch a glimpse of the paint peeling away, revealing insecurities. But I do think everybody has the capacity to change. To be closer to what is commonly perceived as ideal in different aspects.

It'd be cool to be in a production. If only they have auditions for poto extras, haha. I have a lot of problems with shoes. It's my feet. They're really fussy. It sucks because the only pairs I'm truly comfortable wearing are my brown esprit slippers, my roxy shoes and my nikes. But the slippers have lousy tread so I always almost slip when the ground's wet. VERY HAZARDOUS, SUCKS. And the other two pairs I only wear to school and all.

I'm quite alright when I have to take 53247 'rainchecks' (notice the inverted commas) but what fvcking pisses me off is when important messages (read, particularly non conversational/leisure ones, where I ask vital questions) are not replied to. Dammit, it's unforgivable when it just does not sporadically occur.

Long term gratification at stake, as db says. Ahahaha. I want my sunday afternoons back. Don't get me wrong. Amadeus is really quite a challenging experience but alot of the time I just want to spend my time sleeping at home. Okays, I hope the stalkers can settle on when to meet and so can dafc. Have decided on my course of action for the next few days. Will await further developments. I need MOOLAH BADLY ! And I'm not even talking about CNY stuff. I can't wait for angbaos. =X Frankie owes me one, haha.

No one wanted to catch the match with me (cue sobs) but I caught it on tv from around the 70th minute onwards. Haha, I wish I was there ! Talk about nerve wrecking. I guess the highlight for me was seeing that wow shot at goal from Precious and seeing that TOTALLY WOW save by Shyamsudin (or however you spell his name). Yups, so it ended with penalties and a very lucky, redeeming save by lionel lewis.

Buxtehude sectionals tomorrow. Need to liase with some mich, meeoow. It's almost 4am, till later..

Today was a depressing day because after a tiring, backbreaking 8 hours wrapping storybooks, I had to get this searing pain in my stomach/abdomen/funny weird area that was either gastric or wind. I didn't have the strength to walk or talk so it was quite scary. I kept feeling as if I had to sit down. So because of that, I cut short our mini 4i outing. ): ): ): ): ): The five sad faces say it all. I felt quite helpless but I have have have to go out with db, hema, darling partner flora, leanne and dawn (haha, 38 dang !) again ! Yesyes. But the cab cost me 17 bucks. That did not make me a happy girl.

One redeeming point today was that I woke up from a fabulous dream where some of us, (db and some stalkers ? or some p10 people) went to malaysia. I think it was KL and we saw ronniegoh sitting behind us in the bus smiling. Wahaha ! Then we semi-stalked him the next day (we were back in s'pore) and asked if he went to malaysia. LOLS. Damn weird ! But he looked younger and smilier and cuter. Ahaha. Oops, the WLMR (or whatever we were called) ranter/stalker in me. Hahaha.

Only a dull ache remains now but I think I'll be okay tomorrow. I'd better be. Have never felt this weak. And a funny thing I just realised. The very noticeable brown mole on my left bicep is fading to pink. o.O Maybe it really is cancerous ? Lols. Odd.

I had 50 bucks wednesday morning. It's friday night/saturday morning and I'm left with 10. Wadde. ): I hope I get my paycheck soon soon. Have to spend it all anyway. I owe my parents money. =/ Borrowed a pasta book, Murakami's Sputnik Sweetheart and a book of shorts by Ha Jin. I plan to read all but his poetry. (: It's interesting, I can relate to and understand it better than russian fiction. Then again, I only read one novel based in a russian setting and it was horribly complicated. To digress, I enjoyed 1984 though. Heh. Now that I'm working, all I want to do (instead of sai gang) is stay at home and read asian literature.

Gaude as my ringtone is kind of weird. But I guess it beats Aloy's Come What May and our failed Circle of Life. LOLS. Okay, piano tomorrow but I am anything but prepared. I want to go to clarke quay ! But being broke does not help things. Unfounded insecurities ? Haha, meow. Buttercup. We shall see ayes ? And I think signing up for the ritz was for not. I think I want to quit in june to go on holidays. Oh and I feel like highlighting my hair. But I love that it's so black. Heh, I hope we go to the beach and I don't get burnt/tanned. Bloody cab. I am poor beyond reason. I still owe yl money. I think I shan't eat after buxtehude. Zzz. Maybe I'll have another ronnay dream tonight.. Ahaha, so random. Till later..

:D

My eyelids are heavy. My wallet is empty. Uneasiness renders my heart unable to get ahold of itself. I feel as if there are so many things going on and yet there is nothing. We plan and expect so much and little by little, things fall through. Where is the commitment. Is every wishful thought a selfish, fleeting desire ? A momentary but ultimately hollow high? I don't know. Am just tired and uncertain.

Wrapping books is backbreaking work. Yesterday my pants were too loose and today my blouse was too short. Am just flashing half the kiddos at the centre, rahh. And it's not as if I have such an intention. I took the wrong bus but thank God I met my uncle richard on it, hurhur. How unexpected.

'But I think people are just becoming problems I uptake just to show I can fix them.'
-Sooks.

When altruism and concern become another avenue to prove one's point. We've all been guilty of this. Brings to mind Coldplay's Fix You. My alarm bells are in overdrive but I could just be overreacting majorly. Shrugs. I like being cryptic. Yes I feel guilty but surely the reaction could've been less drastic. Then again, we're talking about a person whose dramatics we all have to be prepared for. Okay, talk about parallels. Man, it's disturbing.

Sometimes I just hate it that none cedar people know my blog. That's why I've been wanting to switch to LJ. For the convenience of 'friends only' entries. But what the hell. I don't think am blaming anyone. Might want to give myself a kick or two but that's about it. Like what sooks said, we're answerable to ourselves.

If we DO go beaching, I shall prompt ahhuay and we shall check out cafe del mar ! Hurhur. Reminds me of tang. Meow. Eyes closing. I don't know why I even come online every night. Perhaps it's a habit now that stemmed from a previous intention. Ah wells, we'll see about tomorrow ayes.

It was planned ! =X

Haha, I really love charlene. Believe me, I do. :D But we couldn't resist. To the coolest, craziest, most aunty teacher I know. (:

Am quite exhausted, heels suck. I need to add shoes on my list of things to buy. Potential sentosa outing next saturday with the dee eh eff sea girls. (: I foresee a few gazillion more photos. I hope it materialises. (: To cut a long story short, I really enjoyed the time with AHHUAY, ADEL, REGINA, RADISH & TMX. We ate at a kopitiam then at macs then went to an alley. And we had fun. Hahah, again again please (:

I'll be preoccupied after work next tuesday and weds. Have a project to work on. It's going to be exciting but reeeally expensive as well. I foresee spending all of my january pay. ): But it's for a worthy cause. Stalkers may meet next week too but ruz and slin don't know their schedules so it's quite hard to plan it.

Damn, I'm fat and it's depressing. Ironically everyone's growing thinner. Obviously my drinks have been spiked with globules or whatchamacallit of fat. ): ): ):

It's 1am. I have to wake up at 7. Sooks is flinging with an incredibly sweet dude. Db has moving woes. Qua, graces and yt are still looking for jobs. Adel is quitting hers. Aloy is having issues with his clique. If everyday could close with an episode of scrubs or frasier, I may just sleep a reeeally happy girl.

We all have things that we can't get off our backs. That leach we just can't seem to shake off. And the only way we can even attempt anything to get rid of it is to risk first degree burns.

I don't think I ever blamed them for your actions. I believe that everyone has the ability to choose for themselves. You of all people should not have been held hostage or allowed your emotions to be traded as ransom.

Along that stretch, the warm fuzzy feeling was quickly displaced by despondence. Oh and it left a slightly bitter aftertaste.

Thought about some interesting nuggets during work but I forgot them. Oh well. Tomorrow/today's another day for ruminating. We shall see ayes.

Am dejected because we're not going to sentosa after all. Not for a very very very long time. ): Sigh. ): Ah wells. And I can't see them tomorrow because I'm meeting DAFC instead so the turnout had better be nothing short of fantastic.

I just thought about something. Worth. A person's value. What makes a person more valuable than others to those around him. The collective weight of perceptions.

Interesting. Am feeling schleepy. Watched part of the first half of the s'pore m'sia match. No offence but Laos must've been really bad. =X They were very focused on defence which wasn't even that fabulous. Then their passes were quite sloppy, lost possession really easily. I remember the commentator remarking something along the lines of 'what was he thinking ? was that a pass or a shot at goal ?'. Well evidently he passed to the other team's goalie ? Lols. But they were better in the second half I suppose though the captain was sent off for some funny reason and the referee was being really weird. Yes so anyway, it was a 1-1 draw. I don't mind watching the second leg this saturday but I've only asked dj and aloy so far. They aren't too free/keen and I assume the rest are preoccupied. Oh wells, I need to save up for poto anyway.

From zachbraff.com :D

Answers to some of your questions:

What would I name my Robot? Dan
What do I do in my free time? Sleep. (sometimes blog)
How's Roscoe? Currently barking at a squirrel.
Short film fest? Yes. Working on organizing.
Coming to Australia for the premiere? No. Sorry. But I love it there.
Will I marry you? Yes. Send pics.
What time do you have to be at work tomorrow? 6am
Why are you still writing? Cause I'm going for Best Blog Ever
Do you really think they're still reading? Yes; somewhere it's early.
And my favorite: Zach, how are you?”

As Colin Hay sings in I'm Doing Fine:

I'm doing fine
and thanks for asking

I wish for you all: mind peace.
I wish for our planet: Earth peace.

***

Haha. I love zach braff (: The next stalkers' dinner is in the planning stages, yay. I hope I get to see slin and ruz. Hrmms maybe I should message flora.. I need moolah for transport. Sigh. Am sneezy and tired. If only I get paid at the end of the day every day. Lols. We'll see how it goes.

Oh, I almost forgot. I hope markmark gets well soon (:

So I can't meet them tomorrow. ): But we have to meet soon anyway ! Which reminds me..the photos. =/ I'm lazy. I hope the turnout for weds is good though ! And that we don't eat anything expensive. Haha.

I want to play captain's ball at the beach. I hope we have at least ten people for the sentosa outing and that it doesn't rain. Hurhur. And we have to confirm chomp chomp soon so we can spend that dinner discussing sentosa, lols. 4 more days till zx and jq become men, hahaha. I miss wl and shawn ):

Potentially, qua and maybe graces may be employed at my workplace. It's not that I'm dying there, it's great, but it's be even better to have my lovelies. Hurhur, crosses fingers especially for qua ! It's really far for graces.

I realise that with work now, my week is kinda packed. I'm around bedok 6 days a week with amadeus and work. Then there's piano on saturdays which means I hardly have time to practise. =/ Ah wells, am tired.

Anyway, I know I shouldn't but here's a little something for
Kiki, Aloy, Shaun and Shawn.


(I predicted that it'd either be 2-0 or 2-1.. 90th minute too, wahaha cw will be pleased..)
I couldn't resist. =X

weiruthePUZZLED *hope My homework just disappeared. \\ missusmortensen says:

as much as we want ppl to love us and we want to matter to others

weiruthePUZZLED *hope My homework just disappeared. \\ missusmortensen says:

i think its much more meaningful that you know who people are to you. you are, after all, answerable to yourself

True, only you can make yourself happy. It's all in the mind. And anyway, you only have one life to be happy. We all have our own self made morphine and valium. It's whether we choose to let it course freely within the streams of our veins and let it navigate the maze that is our mind. Oh and whether we allow it to unravel the affairs of the heart ayes.

***

I love you sooks ! :D

Aloy has a reeeally intriguing subnick, hehe. For him to know and for me to find out. Find out. Hurhur. Yeah, our friendship is not based on that. (: I actually wanted to watch the Singapore Malaysia match live. Only to find out that it's being played in Shah Alam. Like, wadde. Lols.

Amadeus wasn't bad. (: Am becoming more familiar with the pieces. Was telling yl that frankie and dj are opposites. One comes to learn and the other just feels sian. Haha oh wells but I got to see my favourite AUNTY 'ABCDEFG OCEANIC TRENCH' MARGARET ! Heh. We shall catch up proper and embarass ourselves on weds !

Work tomorrow, meow. But I'll be seeing people I love soon. Heh. Bought more work clothes, hoho. Including this nice white top from U2 yay. I want my jewellery and bag and shoes and camera and belt soon ayes ! Hahaha. Okay yesterday's youtube video was my 444th post. I intended it to be something else that's not of today's melancholic nature either but ah wells. Fate/Destiny/God decrees this to be so. And so it is. My brother's Hardy Boys' mystery calls, hehe.

Bitter sweets. Good night.

40 Things of 2006

01. What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before?
1. Became a World Choir Games champion. AHAHAHA. :D
2. Sat for the As and felt really stupid still.
3. Seen many more sides of humanity.

02. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
HAHA. No. I only really made one this year.

03. Did someone close to you give birth?
Nopes.

04. Did anyone close to you die?
Nope, which is good.

05. What countries did you visit?
China and Malaysia.

06. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Erm. For once, GOOD GRADES. And more outings with the people I love. (:

07. What date from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Well. I can't say for sure but those days in July were quite memorable and my birthday maybe ? Lols.

08. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
WCG. Seeing the altos grow. Oh and becoming good friends with the most random people.

09. What was your biggest failure(s)?
Hrmms. It probably has to be not being closer to God than I could've been.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The usual nonsense. The flu, bad throat, rashes =/

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Erms, my current handphone ? Not that I bought it per se haha.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
DB. (:

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Well hrms. Appalled, no. Depressed, yes. Not going to name names. Haha.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Food I suppose. Haha and junk I end up not using.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ending the wretched exams, lols.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you
i. happier or sadder? Happier. I am employed. I still meet up with girlfriends. Life's not bad.
ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter dammit, lols.
iii. richer or poorer? Poorer, thanks to adult fare. But richer in experience and wiser perhaps.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Studied harder, prayed more. It never changes.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Getting embroiled and depressed over nonsense when I should've been conscientiously studying the crises in the Middle East.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
This year ? The way I spend it every year. Opening presents. HAHA. With people I love of course.

22. Did you fall in love in 2006?
Nope. Kind of premature don't you think ?

23. How many one-night stands?
Haha ! None.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
SCRUBS BABY ! Oh and Frasier. (:

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't hate people. I just.. dislike some people intensely I guess. Okay not even intensely. I am peace loving. AHAHA.

26. What was the best book you read?
Wow. Hrmmms. I don't know actually. Didn't really get to properly read much.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Imogen Heap, definitely.

28. What did you want and get?
Good friends. And quite an exciting school year I guess.

29. What did you want and not get?
Hahaha. Lots of things. Good grades amongst others.

30. Favorite film of this year?
Can't think of it actually. Which probably means it wasn't that legendary.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Eighteen. Interestingly, I celebrated it with my juniors and it was very different though not for altogether wonderful reasons.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
The ommission of ______ tantrums. Many things I guess.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
No different from 2005 ? Haha.

34. What kept you sane?
Knowing that I could still talk to people like db, sooks, p8.. And oddly enough, choir. Sometimes. Ahahaha.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Zach Braff !

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Seeing as I am apolitical and all....

37. Who do you miss?
Taaaannnng. And alot of times, p8 and the stalkers.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
There's no best. But I love my juniors. (:

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006:
I guess it has to be that you can't depend on anyone else but yourself and God to be happy.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Hrmmmmms. Completely random yet apt.
No Importa La Distancia.

***

Hrk just got owned by some fake-o banana. Wahaha, funny ah he. Okay was really bored at home so I just.. took a nap. Ahaha. Which is bad. But anyway, I finished War Trash and it's really good so everyone should read it. It was shortlisted for the Pulitzer or something, haha.

Was going to blog about those people on your msn list you hardly or close to never talk to. But am feeling rather sleepy so maybe another day. You know what ? I like self sufficiency. Not that I am very self sufficient. But perhaps that can be attributed to my laziness. I also like pro-activeness. Lj is irritating. I can't wait till I get my first paycheck. It's okay to do some things alone sometimes. Like shopping. And finding your way around a foreign place. I don't know. I'm probably just feeling cranky because I am envious. But I guess God is fair in that everyone has their own set of different issues to deal with. Ayes, am rambling. Whatever.

Amadeus later on. Haven't learnt my songs. Not sure of 2/3 of the movements. Oh meow. And I need clothes for work. I have no shirts, bahh.

Okay this is just me being cranky from boredom and semi depressed from stuff.

It's always around this time when I get hungry. Not good. The stalkers should meet again, I still haven't seen ruz and slin ! And what happened to the outing with 38dang ? Hahah. Some people are self absorbed. No wait, everyone is self absorbed. Ego centric. Selfish. Me included. Oh what the hell. Such is life. You're bound to be disappointed oh say, six days a week at least.


Haha, after sectionals on wednesday.

Okay we'll see how it goes. Hope practice is cool and all is not lost. Ahahah, till later..

Too tired to blog properly. Haha. Spent some time with the nursery school kids. Seriously, some of them are terrors. But they're quite okay and the girls kept wanting to lie in my lap during english. =/ Some of them are quite pretty though. Dj will like. Aahaha. (: The rest of the day was spent learning how to use the system, typing in fee stuff, printing reports, writing receipts (about a hundred ? =/), cataloging books on the computer.. Yeah. I felt like taking leave already. Lols. But my bosses are really good so I'm grateful. (: And the kids are adorable even though there's always at least one of them crying ahaha.

Then met lala, yl and later yt but we didn't watch the movie after all. (I met ms zhu (: ) I had soggy fries and a fish burger and we just sat outside the choir room talking for about 2 hours. Haha. Truth be told, I'd never think we'd be able to do that. We being yl & gang people. Interesting huh..how things have turned out, lols. But yeah, I enjoyed myself. (: Dinner again next friday ! I want to go to chomp chomp mans !

Okays. Piano tomorrow which I still haven't practiced for. The keys feel so foreign and my scales are at the pace at which dead caterpillars crawl. =/ Sigh. Dismal. I know. I feel the pain myself when I play. I feel like stopping indefinitely but I don't know. I'll just regret it later on. BLAH.

Xunny found a job. I am so glad for my xunny bunny (oops correction, society's ahaha) ! But it's a pity she works so far. ): We can't have lunch or anything. (actually, not that I even have lunch outside the centre lols) Ah wells.. Hope qua and graces find employment soon ! And we'll be meeting up soon yayy. (:

So a DAFC AGM date has been confirmed. Wahaha hope it'll be a success. Though I have no idea what we'll be doing. Podcasts are difficult to create in public, lols. Am lazy to cook noodles. But I'm hungry. As always. ):

Good things come to those who are patient right ? Ahaha, the Lord is just preparing you for great things. It's hard I guess, seeking immediate gratification. Are we rash by nature or has society moulded us into mere droids, marching in step too fast to even consider glancing at the weeds blowing in the wind ? (okay that was a long sentence, haha) It's interesting but perhaps some of it can be attributed to being selfish. Not taking time to consider the interests of the whole but the constantly putting forward the self. Ayes. That was an interesting nonsensical chunk of randomness. Oh and I am going to quote Ha Jin's War Trash:

'How easily could humanity deteriorate in wretched conditions ? How low could an ordinary man fall when he didn't serve a goal larger than himself ?'

Cool eh ? Okay, I'll muse some more tomorrow. Have to rest. Weekends are going to be sacred from now on, lols. And I probably won't be able to go back to choir unless I change my hours. We'll see how yeah. Remind me to send the photos. I need a banquet slot for extra spending money. Aha. Goodnight all.

You Are Lightning

Beautiful yet dangerous People will stop and watch you when you appear Even though you're capable of random violence You are best known for: your power Your dominant state: performing

Your Pickup Line Is

Be unique and different - just say yes.

Your Vocabulary Score: A-

Congratulations on your multifarious vocabulary! You must be quite an erudite person.

Haha yay ! But I admit that I had to guess some of the definitions, lols. Anyway, I am a happy girl because I have been hired. (: Praise God ! Heh, am going to do admin and help a little with the kids at a PCF in Bedok. Yayy, I start tomorrow. Hope things go well and the toddlers (and staff) don't hate me. Hahahhaa. Okay, I have to sleep earlier and decide what to wear and all that nonsense.

I hope it doesn't rain tomorrow and I hope aloy won't have to dwell on his issue for long. Am reading Ha Jin's acclaimed War Trash. It's been good so far. (: So yes, apart from perpetual brokeness and transport woes, life is good.

(:

Her face is a map of the world
Is a map of the world
You can see she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
And everything around her is a silver pool of light
The people who surround her feel the benefit of it
It makes you calm
She holds you captivated in her palm

Suddenly I see
This is what I wanna be
Suddenly I see
Why the hell it means so much to me

I feel like walking the world
Like walking the world
You can hear she's a beautiful girl
She's a beautiful girl
She fills up every corner like she's born in black and white
Makes you feel warmer when you're trying to remember
What you heard
She likes to leave you hanging on a wire

Suddenly I see

And she's taller than most
And she's looking at me
I can see her eyes looking from a page in a magazine
Oh she makes me feel like I could be a tower
A big strong tower
She got the power to be
The power to give
The power to see

Suddenly I see

KT Tunstall's Suddenly I See. (: I feel quite empowered singing this song, I don't know why. It's on loop haha. Have been up since 8 and I only had 6 hours of sleep (9 is the norm). So am too sleepy to go into details about today. Besides, I need to be up at 8 tomorrow for an interview. Meow, I am poor and I have no clothes. My eyes are closing. I have three necklaces in mind to buy already. Goldish dog tag, a wing one and a flamingo one. It should come up to 40 bucks. Please let me get a banquet slot the following week.

We'll see how things go tomorrow. Today is a good day. I bought a pretty wallet for 12 bucks. (: Despite unemployment, life is good. Proactivity and patience is key. You determine your own happiness. Mmm. Thanks to aloy for the belated christmas present. (:

:D

I have many reasons to smile. But most importantly, I met three girlfriends and one girlman ! Am I lucky or what ? Hehe ! Graces had a reeeally pretty skirt and bag from australia. Xunny had mango ice kachang for lunch and Qua chose the weird movie we watched. Jema was just complaining about her sucky internship. But I LOVE LOVE LOVE them all. It was just a pity we couldn't meet mich, sally and kiki.

So we met at the bugis foodcourt and caught up and stuff. Heh. Then we took a cab to the esplanade and rented a room (I know it sounds wrong lols) where we watched Keeping the Faith. Graces and I wanted spongebob. HAHA. But anyway the movie was all weird and horny and we fast forwarded some bits. But the room was nice and beeeg and fun to be in with the rest to crap with. Oh and graces' starburst and wonka candy. :D So jema came and we all went crazy with ideas and made wonderful plans. AHAHA. (: So yes, it's happening for real. Then jema left to meet her friends and the rest of us went to eat, talk, crap, lament and plan some more at the pizza hut in suntec. AHHHHH I had so much fun. Hurhurhur. I just enjoy talking and bonding with them. We don't even need to do anything. And we were all getting high (from being jobless) especially graces, haha. Giggling about couple meals and remembering lesbian freaks as well as people who owe them money. (: It was just really fun talking. Ahhhh. And kind darling xunny offered to return my books. Muacks for her !

But honestly, seriously, XXOO for p8. I'm so blessed with wonderful friends. (: (: (: We have to meet up again soon, hurhur. I hope we'll be unemployed by then, lols.

Went for some funny interview at the airport but the pay's crap so I don't think I'm going to accept even if they want me. And even if it sounds different from other jobs. Passenger service assistant. Ooh, but I just hate IRAS for not calling us. GAHHHH.

So we're not going cherr's bank gig tomorrow. ): Ayes, there'll be a next time I guess. And there has to be a next time the rest of the stalkers meet ! Meeeow. Got two interviews lined up. Going to find my way around maxwell road myself tomorrow and joining yt for lunch and recruit express again, lols. Then I'm going down for sectionals to see the new j1s and I may meet db for dinner. Hahaha. Packed day. But sounds good.

You know, I still want to take up ocm's offer. But I hardly think it's possible to if I take an admin job. Argh. I have half a mind to put everything on the line and just be a waitress until I can do relief. I don't know. Yikes. I should message him and consult my parents too. Gah. Decisions.

I found a really great song I heard on SYTYCD. KT Tunstall's Suddenly I See. Lovely. (: Lyrics tomorrow heh. We should reopen the p10 blog too, lols. Okays, it's two and I have to wake up at 8. We'll see how it goes. Till later..


Suddenly I see
Why the hell it means so much to me

I love balloons. (:

I feel like baking something. Hmmms. My grandma's place will make a better kitchen though. Watched an episode from Scrubs IV. It makes me happy happy like nothing can. :D Okay, my books are overdue. Shall pop by the library and maybe borrow some cookbooks. Hahahaha. It might appease my mother, at least for a while. On a similar note, I love my grandmother's fried rice. (: Am having all these odd cravings for outings to ECP (changi food village centre thing place), chomp chomp and the prata house. Aaaaahhh. Oh, and it's been a long while since I've shared an earthquake from swensens with anyone.

I saw pretty jewellery at Diva and Chomel. Oh oh I hope I don't spend ALL the money from my first paycheck. =/ Haha. Darn IRAS. Why haven't they called ? Mucho thanks to frankie for taking me to the banquet place and showing me around sorta. (: I hope I don't need to wait for the end of february to start. =/

Meeting some of p8 tomorrow. JOYYY (: If I do make it to NUS, I might want to take up european studies ! Gives me a chance to learn french ! Ooh lalaa (: Am quite keen on social work too. Ahh, I am wishing and hoping and praying that I do well enough. But am not going to think about it until the middle of february at least. =/

Twentyeighth. Hrmms. I know I'd find it freaky too. Haha, but cn has no reason to be scared. It's getting annoying though, I am not a fan of this despondency. I really like the top 4 finalists for so you think you can dance season 2. They're such happy, good dancers. And the guys are cute, heh. (:

Oh perilous place walk backwards toward you
Blink disbelieving eyes chilled to the bone
Most visibly brave no aprehended gloom
First to take this foot to virgin snow

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
And I lift the envelope pushed far enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to serve, destined to roam

Oh ominous place spellbound and unchild-proofed
My least favorite chill to bare alone
Compatriots in place they'd cringe if I told you
Our best back-pocket secret our bond full-blown

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a pioneer naive enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to seek, destined to know

Most beautiful place reborn and blown off roof
My view about-face whether great will be done

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a ground-breaker naive enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a Joan of Arc and smart enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to reign, destined to roam

Very pretty, ethereal song. Wunderkind by Alanis Morissette for the OST of The Chronicles of Narnia. I should watch it one day. When I exhaust all the good comedies. I watched Taladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby starring Will Ferell today. Hahaha, it's quite funny and good. I like frat pack shows. (:

So Yolk & Co might be renamed Avenue 6. Hahaha. We are really that bored. And we need our AGM just like DAFC does. Maybe we should have a 33 outing while we're at it. Though I can never be sure about the boys. =/

Eight words to a smile. (:

I guess it's times like these I shouldn't ask for anything more. May there be job openings tomorrow for me, haha. I've taken to wearing my running shoes thanks to the constant downpour. Poor traction does not agree with me obviously. Till later, ta-ta..

Sing me something soft,
Sad and delicate,
Or loud and out of key,
Sing me anything,
We're glad for what we've got,
Done with what we've lost
Our whole lives laid out right in front of us
-Existentialism On Prom Night, Starlight Run

You're like,
laa dee daa
and I'm like,
aaaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhh the anguuuiiish.

'No man is an island, that's true. But the thing is, you really can't depend on others to make you happy.'
-Sumiko Tan, Lifestyle (14th Jan 07)

Something I'm going to have to constantly remind myself when I weigh my options and do cost-benefit analysis.

I'm really sorry. =/

Some thanks. There are just too many assumptions which probably will make my fall from grace harder to recover from. Owch. Contrary to popular belief, you're not helping.

I'm telling hrk that back in Cedar, I was still a happy person. Pretty much and relatively so. Haha, look how much that has changed. I guess it's high time I got a dose of reality.

And it's nice how we can talk about totally random stuff. Like the programs and sweets from the days of old. He's anything but monosyllabic and he replies. (: It's funny how things turn out right ? And somehow, I don't know if I'm wrong, but I don't sense fakeness about him when we converse.

Ayes, I miss talking to ahpa. ):

I haven't gone out with sooks yet ! Pbbfft. So much to do, so little moolah to spend. Haven't discussed plans with p10 either, erpx. But I'm glad to hear that a DAFC AGM is in the works, hurhur. I am very screwed. Practised neither my pieces nor buxtehude. Crap. Crap. Crap.

I don't like the widening void. In every case, I don't.

It's very me to be cryptic so yes. Meow. I feel like switching my blog address but I love this one a lot. And it doesn't make sense for me to keep having like, 5 different blogs ? Lols. Damn why can't I sign up for the nice lj ? Pbbfft.

Anyway, I took an Enneagram Test at this site: http://www.9types.com/newtest/homepage.actual.html
and I'm a 'Helper', lols. 8 points for that one, followed by a romantic/artist (4 points).

The Helper (the Two)
Helpers are warm, concerned, nurturing, and sensitive to other people's needs.

How to Get Along with Me

Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific.
Share fun times with me.
Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours.
Let me know that I am important and special to you.
Be gentle if you decide to criticize me. (yes, this is very apt haha)

In Intimate Relationships

Reassure me that I am interesting to you.
Reassure me often that you love me.
Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me.
(talk about having a lot of insecurities =X)

What I Like About Being a Two

being able to relate easily to people and to make friends
knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better
being generous, caring, and warm
being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings
being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor

What's Hard About Being a Two

not being able to say no
having low self-esteem
feeling drained from overdoing for others
not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish
criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should
being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tune in to them
working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings (sometimes I suppose..)

Twos as Children Often

are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism
try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding (erm, really ? lols)
are outwardly compliant (my parents would disagree)
are popular or try to be popular with other children
act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention
are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos), or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos)

Okay, we'll see how it goes tomorrow. I hope my piano teacher doesn't kill me. =/ Que sera sera, whatever will be, will be.

maybe i should wait on tables. given current financial crisis.
i love people who make me laugh. (:
i don't understand why no one will hire me. =/
i lose sleep when I have rashes. it's a rare blood disease I tell you..
people say i am the epitome of.. angmohness ? haha I have no idea.
love is pretty subtleties.
when i like someone, that someone should be very fortunate. =X Lols.
somewhere someone's wishing on a supernova ? or something. reminds me of The American Tail with the mouse and all. reminds me of my childhood, the movie's so sad. ):
i will always be fixated on some regret or other.
'forever' only applies to God.
i never want to feel utterly helpless and alone.
i think the current US president is nuts. but I can't comment. because I have stopped reading the straits times.
i will never eat bugs. ick.
my past is chock full of 'what ifs' and 'maybes'.
my greatest fear is perhaps, at the moment, hearing what I don't want to hear.
i get annoyed when the bathroom floor is wet before I take a bath. =/ lols
my dog is my darling. I love love love clara. :D
kisses are the best coming from someone who loves you I guess.
tomorrow is another day for waiting I suppose.
i really want for my results to meet my expectations at least.
i have low tolerance for people who are self absorbed.

Okay, that was a meme from jiayi's cute drama friend, hurhur. It rained ALL DAY today. Quite dreary I guess but it was really cool, cold even. So it made napping and dvd watching quite comfortable. (: Zoolander is quite hilarious ! Wahaha, I like ben stiller and owen wilson. They make a great pair. I think I should borrow the wedding crashers next. And I want to watch il mare and pretty persuasion. (:

Tentatively, our acappella group is called yolk & co. LOLS. I know it's quite nonsensical but whatever mans. Hurhur, I really hope we do something. We're going to have a crayon outing and agm I guess. Which reminds me, has DAFC closed ? Lols.

I feel hungry. That despite 3 pistachio butter cookies and two chocolates (strawberry and coffee filled, mmms). I think I weigh the same as say, three baby rhinos. I need to meet cherr and db to lose weight ! Lols. Blah. A fat face is anything but an asset.

What if I'd gone to ac ? Hrmms. Interesting eh. It's kinda late now to be thinking of probable scenarios huh. Or like, what if I'd joined stajeworks ? I guess I'll never know and the only way is forward. Like forward into money earning mode where I'll be able to get my hands on a nice new (albeit 2nd hand) camera.

I finished Mort. (: Yay for terry pratchett ! I enjoyed it even though it wasn't centred around sam vines' force. Hurhur. When is the next alex rider coming out ? Going to move on to animal crackers tomorrow. It's really annoying because I can't play the middle C, A and high F keys on the piano. And they're quite important. So it makes practising even more annoying argh.

I hope we have guo die tomorrow. Hurhur. Xiaokai was being really random just now, talking about my phone. Haha, not the least bit surprising. I'll probably pop by soon again. When is uncle gerald ever going to change his layout ? I want to read his blog. Meh.

Okay. I'm praying that I get a job soon, that _____ will not be stuck in his emo rut, that I get to meet the people I love soon enough and that the weather lets up. Hahaha. (: Yup, sunday's good even though my piano was postponed. Anyways, till later..

:D

Just watched half of never been kissed. (: Drew barrymore ! Heh. Michael vartan is so hot ! Haha, why am I not an alias fan ? Hurhur, am watching imogen heap videos on youtube. Man, I tell you, I AM A FAN. Her songs rock and she sounds good live. I felt really sad and teary listening to hide and seek. It's just so moving. ): ): Then there was speeding cars and some of her songs were used for ffx clips. REALLY NICE. Goodness. (: I feel all emo now. Haha not really. Just really like moved. Kinda. And and, she was once part of frou frou !!! Like omg. They did let go and I love that song too. Aaaaaahhhhhhh. Okays. I love imogen heap. BEEG HAPPY SMILE. :D

Going to lunch, watch my dvd, practice the piano and do some justice to buxtehude and gtchai, lols. Yayy. I just love zach braff and imogen heap. (: Till later.

I am sick of jobhunting. I sent out like 25 resumes ! Hello! Hrrrrmph. ): I hope I get teaching assignments from ms zhu. And I may get a week from ongcm. Hahaha, we can call it even then (after one year of gp with the man ahaha). And I don't know about tuition. Bleeeaaagh. Feet hurt like hell. My heels. ): _____ was being really emo today, poor guy. I think he's thinking too much though ayes. But I totally empathise. Had really expensive bubble tea. Meeeow. It sucks being poor and STILL UNEMPLOYED. Maybe I should wait on tables. Hrms.

Went for sucky/bleagh interviews in the morning, helped dj(actually just watched =/) with mass auditions in the afternoon, tried to be of use to yenyen (who is a perfectionist and really is wonderfully hardworking with a nice voice ! (: ), met jianqi to get a present (which he already bought, ahha) and then finally met some of yl's gang. Lala, zx, frankie, yl and yt. (: Hehe, we had siam kitchen ! Okaaayy I guess. Super broke. I want to go to bugis street !!! Earrings, blingbling, bags, denim skirts, shoes, tops.. Goodness. I need moolah. And quick.

Oh, and I really enjoyed the ride in yt's family van ! It's so cool, you can like, have a mini party inside and travel around. Hurhur. Ooh, and we discussed plans for a short music video ! HAHAHA. Our acappella group. (: I almost typed Froup. Which quite a cute word hrms. Anyways, we need to carry out our video. Lols, something we wanted to do since before xiamen.

Him of all people. How and why I really cannot fathom. Talk about being fast in lane changing.

But ah wells. Apart from the joblessness, I have a lot of things planned with everyone ! We were talking about the stalkers going on a trip, wooots ! And I want to meet flora and hema and dawn and leanne. And and and there are the all important p10 (eight ? plus 3 ?) outings. So yes. Money. On the double.

Yikes, I haven't had time to practice the piano and buxtehude. I am so screwed, argh. ): Should do that tomorrow. And watch my dvd. And maybe go for more interviews ? Lols. I don't have enough working clothes bleagh.


:D

We are so meeting again soon. Beach. Kbox. Badminton. Citibank, lols. We missed slin and ruz ! But stalkers, ho ! :D :D :D I had a lot of fun, heh. I met jianing ! She's as pretty as ever. She thought I was in sec4. =/

CCA carnival wasn't much. Didn't really walk around. Poor jq's being emo. =/ Hrms.

Furlings. I'm not going to say no. Haha. Wish me luck. (:

Blogger was down last night. I watched Old School but didn't get most of it because it's a vcd and there weren't any subtitles and I couldn't hear what they were saying. Meh. But luke wilson is sooo cute. His brother too, hurhur. Going to watch zoolander tonight I guess. Or maybe the devil wears prada. Napoleon dynamite and john tucker must die the next time I get to video ezy. (:

I got two interviews lined up ! But one of them's a part time job so I'm not too sure. Hrmms. And I might go to the raffles hotel for an interview. We'll see. Even jobhunting is expensive, meow.

Hope it doesn't rain. Cca carnival and stalkers outing later ! But ruz, slin and cherr can't make it. Cherr may meet us.. But ayes ! So sad. Still, we're going to meet again and 4/7 is more than 50% hurhur. (:

I know what I want to get with my first paycheck. (assuming I ever extricate myself from this state of joblessness) A polaroid or lomo/fisheye camera ! Ooh lala, I can ask jq to take me to a second hand camera shop. Hoho. (: I need mooolah !

Pray for good weather. Till later..

I found xunnybunny on Stomp ! The inter jc prom thing. Hahaha ! What a babe, hurhur. Okay, going to video ezy in a bit and then recruit express at ngee ann. Meeow.

I like my hair after it's been blown dry. I look quite retro-ish. All I need is one of them thick hairbands and beetle shades. HAHA. When I start earning moolah, I'll make a pit stop at montip.

I'm going to call a recruitment agency later today. Don't like the whole resume-waiting schtick. So yeah, wish me luck. I'm also going to video ezy to rent a few more movies. (: With that and my book and buxtehude and my pieces and my messy room (including unpacked notes) I shouldn't have nothing to do at home. Lols. I'm just a plain lazy fat ass.

Jogged again today. A missed call, 67 seconds and futile anticipation. Ahh. When will we ever learn ayes ? Haha. If I don't find myself some moolah soon, I'm going to wither away. Really.

All the stalkers but ruz have confirmed so YAYNESS ! (: (: Haha, hope she doesn't have to go to ntuc. The weather's nice because it's raining. I wonder if I'll be seeing the tallies again soon..

Word association.
Wind. Chime.
Bel. Fat. (oh and broke too.)
Promises. Empty.

Ironically it's not my windchime (it's a sphere remember !) that rings hollow. Lols, what did I say about being a manic depressive ? Hurhur.

Am manic-depressive but why should that come as a surprise ? Ha-ha. Screw it, I'm permanently and perpetually depressed. With temporary highs. Sometimes. Maybe. I contradict myself some but oh who cares.

I cut my hair yesterday and it's harder to tie and quite, pong ish ? Lols. Went for the amadeus practice. It was not bad actually. Songs are not THAT tough. We're doing Buxtehude. I know. I've never heard of him either, lols. Kampong Kapor Church, March 2nd, $10 bucks. There'll be organ playing and string ensembles and solos so it'll be an interesting collaboration. Hurhur, hope practices won't get crazy. Goh toh chai (quite a mouthful hrms haha) is quite cool. His resonance singing soprano is enough to rattle windows okay. Super scary. Hahaha but he seems nice. So yeah, apart from the travelling costs and issues, it's pretty okay.

Orange County (starring colin hanks and jack black) was cool. Hahaha. Tons more literal than Garden State. It's quite funny too but too short. ): Overall yayys, I want to watch more cool movies. (: Need a freaking job to pay for transport and buy stuff !!! Meh.

Going jogging before it rains or whatever. Reading Terry Pratchett's Mort. (: Haha. Potential stalkers outing on weds WOOOOOOTS. (: (: (: Haha, have to borrow money for that. =/ And to top up ezlink. Damn.

Meanwhile, ):

My lips are very chapped (as usual) and I am broke beyond the human limits of poorness but yes I am back from my virgin clubbing experience. :D It was quite sexciting ! But it would've been better if I could've stayed longer for the hardcore action, lols. There's going to be a next time. (:

I'm going to spare everyone my lamentations on fat arms and how I was forced to reach home before 0030 and fatness in general. BUT ARGH. Being fat sucks MAJORLY. ):

Saw some quite hot people. The AC girl who won almost everything except the main prizes, lols, is hot. Haha teo won two prizes including mr beautiful skin. Like, LOLS. But the winners were really unexpected especially the prom king haha oh wells. Amanda from 4o was tj's prom queen, hoho cedarians rock yo. (:

I didn't stir my sprite with vodka so it was REALLY strong at first. Haha.. Not that I've been to other clubs but zouk's pretty cool. I saw a whole bunch of people ! Hahaha, but didn't get to take photos with alot of them. At the bus stop chen huihui saw me ! :D Heh, but I didn't get to see darling xunny. I also saw jane yeo, liqing, jade, tina, wendy (all the psls mannnnn ! rocks (: !), some of the 35 people, andrew and his hockey friends, frankie's classmates, may ying and the hockey girls and my favourite, ber and jlow ! AHHHHH ! Hahaha, 4/7 of the stalkers !!! We have to meet soon mans. (: (: Db and I were with adel and hz and his friends, nicholas and jonas. Yup, we had supper then db and I left to take photos lolsss.

So yeah, not enough cam whoring but again, again ! Hoho. (:


Princess Adel, Db and I (: in the only photo where I look decent albeit fat. =(


4/7 of the Stalkers ! Just as their bus came ! I love this photo. But I love the people more. NEED. TO. MEET. UP. OR. ELSE. Db, Jlow and Ber. (: Where's slin, cherr and ruz mans !


Lust, Caution.


Now you know, heh. The one with flash makes me look extremely horrible. LOLS. But anyway, HOTNESS. Hzbro's hot mr popular friend. :D :D I got the picture I wanted though it could've been better. Next time yo !

I tell you, just standing beside him made me smile like crazy. Wahahah, adel and db said I was blushing. Like, whatever mans. I was just standing there being all fat. But hoho, hotness. (:

Wish you were there (: Alumni practice tomorrow, nervewrecking. I feel lazy. Meeeow. Okay tired, poor and still jobless. Till tomorrow.

I just emptied half of my cupboard. And I'm too lazy to arrange everything nicely and all back in. Damn. So there's this heap of junk on the table now and I feel like sleeping but there's piano in awhile. YAWN.

It's been a while since I saw markmark online, heh. He's nonsensical lah, I see so much of him in aloy. Haha funnay. (:

You can't blame me for having trust issues. Oh crap. I'm growing psychotic. Meeow.

I see so many people in need of UNMA aid. Hahaha. The stuff I've orchestrated so far. Db and cn. (failure) Jq and _____. (success ! kinda, the first step.. ahaha) Stuff in the works: qua and good malay boys. Lolss.

Okay. Piano. Nap. Lunch. (or lunch then nap, hmmm)A sexciting time. Woots. Does anyone want to crash the cca carnival ? Falalala !

Was looking through my pictures when I came across these. FUNNAY. (:


Be Yourself Day 2005, haha. Sickos.


Them again, we were in the compasspoint kfc, I don't remember why though. But those were the days man..


Be Yourself Day and we were rushing econs essays. Ngps. Tsk. Lols, so loser-ish right.

You know, I had a very crappy day. Okay not really. I was just in a very very crappy mood. Crappy meaning cranky and sulky and in a gruff leave-me-alone-and-let-me-sleep kind of way. After a bunch of phonecalls I met my mother at compasspoint for lunch. Bought a office-ish skirt and and blackish jeans ! I love love love the jeans. (: They're straight cut so yay.

Just watched disney channel, ooh whee. (: Flight of the Phoenix too, earlier on. I must admit that my knowledge of ergs and the lack of cloud cover in deserts made me appreciate the landscape in the movie a bit more, heh.

Tomorrow, I am just going to make sure I have a very sexciting time with db, princess adel, hzbro and his friends ! Wahahaha. I must make sure I get the picture I want. I hope I'll be able to properly document my night out, hoho. Am quite excited. We shall see ayes ! (:

Just one dampener.

Speaking of db, she came over to my place on thursday and spent half the time gushing over clara and the other half of the time trying on my clothes. Lols, I was quite amused to say the least. But it's okay, she's welcome anytime ! :D Just no more forty photos, heheh.

I like my 2 dollar daiso japanese wind chime. Though technically it doesn't chime. It's just this simple glass sphere/dome thing. (: Wind song. Auuuuuura. Hahaha. Cacimbo ! Geography six ? The horses are restless. Simplicity. Simply vunderful. Okay, cheesy moment here. Songs were anything but simple though.

But anyways, what I wanted to say was that the thing that completely turned my crappy mood around was hearing my dear xiaokang say that he got promoted ! (: (: (: I am so happy for lustful tan. I have to go back soon to bully that boy. But yayy, prayer changes things and God really works miracles ayes ? Not to say that he required a miracle but hey, only he will really know no ? Hahah. Praise God ! Woots for xiaokang. :D

For you, forgiveness is cheap. But hon, it ain't free.
Did you learn anything at all ?

Masterplan remember ? Jogged again today, calves kind of ache. But it's all good, haha. And piano resumes tomorrow. Sigh, zzz. A lost cause I say. The All American Rejects are quite cool. Move along, dirty little secrets, swing swing and it ends tonight. I like fireworks but as I've said, the time I saw it in australia was total wowness. (: Hard to compare, it was at the beach with the softest sand between my toes and the waves as the soundtrack. Surfer's Paradise, Gold Coast. A little piece of heaven and I'm not even a surfer. (:


Like ahloy said once, we should go somewhere overseas together ho ! Not malaysia please, lols. And we should take markmark and yt along too ! Sounds quite fun eh. Hurhur.

Okay shall report tomorrow. Meow.

Rawrrr, I'm in a very I-hate-the-world-because-I'm-unemployed-STILL mood. Very cranky to say the least. And how the heck do I write a resume ? The fact that it will be so un-meaty totally defeats the purpose of having to write one. Why oh why. I thought the nation sorely lacked teachers (especially those of the humanities sort) but alas, I was mistaken. The youth of singapore are unwanted and un-needed. It's interesting, as qua mentioned, because if every single employer wants people with experience, we will never ever get experience ! So where do all the non-experienced people get jobs ? Argh. I hate the corporate world. I am this close to running to alaska to raise a herd of sled dogs for an expedition across the north pole.

What nonsense. So much for doing everything they can to create jobs for the people. GLARES. I tell you, it won't be long before xunny, qua, mich and I turn to a life of crime and drugs. Don't blame us when you find out your kid has been recruited into one of our gangs for the bi-monthly kua-simi/staring contest complete with parangs wrapped in newspaper. Am growing delusional.

You are not helping.

Even very pretty purple nails cannot help to ease the pain. I am going to be a recluse, unemployed forever. So sue me. This is how it feels to be unwanted. Stomps around.


This was so so long ago. Mark's farewell, kinda. We've all grown so much since then.

Like dammit, I'm paying adult fares and I need to send in resumes. Crap. Life sucks as you grow older. I only hope that I never have to lose my friends along the way.

***

Too tired so am going to make a list.

Not so great things that happened:
Spent money on lousy neoprints. Borders played us out. Kino has no vacancies. BEING POOR. (not that it happened per se but yes, my wallet contains 180 dollars less. boo.)Didn't get to meet xunny, mich and jema due to time and distance constraints. =/

Great things that happened:
Took neoprints with db. Borrowed two more books. Animal Crackers and War Trash. (: Got a manicure !!! (: (: MAGENTA, HOLLER !!! I saw a botak weeliang ! (: (he was super shy, damn funny..) I saw tannnng again ! (: (: (pity shaun couldn't say hi) Most importantly, I SAW FLORA GONG HUIFEN MY DARLING DARLING PARTNER FOR 2 YEARS AHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!! And I saw her kelvin too as an added bonus, hahaha omg. I can't believe I saw her. I love love love that girl ! We have to meet up soon. (: (: (:

Have to meet the tallies and stalkers soon too ! Hope I get a job tomorrow. So overall it was a good day. Pretty purple nails and seeing my dear fellow 38dang-er. (:


and my wasted heart will love you

Haven't watched love actually in a while. So sweet. ______ and jq are getting along quite nicely, hahaha. Yeahh, saturday here I come ! Orange County (not the series) and job hunting tomorrow. Ooh, jogging too.

Oh ahh, sadness. ):

Haha, nonsensical but I like the site. It's quite quirky. Go make a card there if you're bored. Which I was. I went jogging today ! Not a lot though, I stopped to walk now and then, lols. Still it is quite the surprise of the century. But then again, it's a new year. Tang said to try to keep my resolutions so it's a start. Haha. Meeting db tomorrow as well as xunny, qua and mich to decide on the borders gig. Meeeow. Job hunting sucks. Josh just doesn't want to recommend anything to me, lols. Bah. Okay am bored and am feeling anti social. Maybe one day when I'm feeling more rah rah I'll talk to people on msn. I shall TRY to go jogging before I meet my lovelies tomorrow. I've painted my canvas shoes ! Woots ! Just that they are a wee bit big. Shall see how it goes. Saturday sounds promising. I think. Hrmmms oh well, we shall see.

Have to have faith that every unreplied message, every missed call, every failure to reach a certain standard is part of God's plan ayes.

Going to read. (: Oh, I read in someone's blog that when you have to confess to someone, it probably means you don't like/love the person. Because your actions would've done the talking a long time ago. Lols ! Quite true I think, to some extent. Food for thought eh.. Anyways, hope aloy is alright and everyone had a great first day. Counting (:

***

We three kids ! Bimbos. Our kid's meal, heh.


Luigi hrk, for comparison's sake..


Mario shaun..


And princess don't know what aloy ! Haha, mario racing.


Because I napped after dinner from 6ish all the way till 1130 so am pretty much wide awake even after that's so raven and lizzie maguire. Ahh, cable and disney channel. (:


Q: What is in your left pocket?
A: Nothing.

Q: How much alcohol did you have this
week?
A: None. Lols, didn't even get to sample chinguan's on saturday.

Q: Do you eat gas station food?
A: Why not ? Polar curry puffs.

Q: Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a
good movie?
A: Ooh, another one to add to my list of movies to watch including Old School and Orange County.

Q: Is there a person who is on your
mind right now?
A : Nah not really. Haha, am thinking about my probable virgin clubbing experience. Kinda.

Q: Do you think that person is
thinking of you too?
A: -

Q: What color underwear do you have
on?
A: Blue I think..

Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in
your house?
A: Laminate flooring. I like carpeting !

Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A: Ooh, I just heard something about having your very own home spa- sitting in the shower !

Q: Could you live with roommates?
A: Why not ? I had fun in malacca and xiamen. (:

Q: How many pairs of flip-flops do you
own?
A: Currently 3 but the thailand one is out of commission. ):

Q: Where were you born?
A: Gleneagles.

Q: Ever been to rehab/jail?
A: Nahh.

Q: Last time you had a run-in with the
cops?
A: Never.

Q: What do you want to be when you
grow up?
A: I really don't know sadly..

Q: Who is number 1 on your top 8?
A: Top 8 what ? Lols, I don't know but I had a sudden thought of Ewan McGregor (:

Q: What cell phone service do you
have?
A: Singtel

Q: How many people are on your friends
list?
A: On msn ? 216.

LAST:

Q: Friend you talked to? In person?
Online?
A: In person, shaun. Online, sharon.

Q: Last person you called?
A. Ermm don't recall..

Q: Person you hugged
A: Xunny and quaaa !


FAVORITE:

Q: Number?
A: 5

Q: Color(s)?
A: Greens, blues, pinkpurples.. Happy colours (:

Q: Season?
A: The non-monsoon season.


CURRENTLY:

Q: Mood?
A: Not feeling anything but maybe a bit weird because the last time I ate was 7 hours ago so the stomach is being funny.

Q: Listening to?
A: Barbara Ann by The Beach Boys (: (:

Q: Watching?
A: Was watching disney channel..

Q: Worrying about?
A: Getting a job. =/

RANDOM:

Q: First thing you did this morning?
A: Sit up in bed ? Lols.

Q: Do you have anything bothering you?
A: The job thing ! Why don't I have people dying to employ and pay me 1.2k a month ???

Q: Is your bestfriend a boy or a girl?
A: I'm blessed with both types haha. (:

Q: What's annoying you right now?
A: STOP ASKING DAMMIT ! The job thing ! Well actually, the fact that I'm repeatedly asked what's bothering me is annoying me.

Q: What's the last movie you saw in
theatres?
A: Night at the Museum

Q: Do you smile often?
A: I hope so though I've been told that I frown a lot.. It comes naturally..

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: Yes, I honestly think so (:

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: It's a colourful disney shirt haha

Hahaha. Random nonsense. But what the heck, here's another. Maybe I should go do those little blog things next, lols. I need a job !

[x] You know someone that cares about
you.
[ ] You have a girlfriend/boyfriend/
fiancee/ husband/ wife.
[ ] You have your own room.
[x] You own a cell phone.
[x] You have an ipod/ mp3 player.
[x] Your parents are still married.
[x] You have more than 2 best
friends.

T O T A L: 5

[x] You dress how you want to.
[x] You hang out with friends more
than once a week.
[x] There is a computer and laptop in
your house.
[ ] You have never been beaten up.[by
parent]
[x] You never cry more than twice a
month.
[x] You are allowed to listen to the
music you want to.
[x] Your room is big enough for you.
[x] People don't use you for something
you have.
[ ] You have been to a concert. (someone take me please !!!)
[x] You laugh more than twice a day. (yeah I think I do :D)

T O T A L: 13

[x] You have over 50 friends on
Friendster. (not a good gauge hello !)
[ ] You have pictures on myspace.
[x] Your parents let you have a
Friendster (erm, why would they care ???)
[ ] You have no problem in your
studies. (MY ASS ! I wish !)
[x] You collect something normal. (I collect dust ? inadvertantly under my bed =X)
[x] People don't make fun of you to
be mean.
[ ] You look forward to going to
school. (haha, oops I think I'll look forward to like, ONE DAY only)
[x] You don't wish you were someone
else. (only sometimes =/)
[x] You do something after school at
home/outside.
[ ] You always pass ALL the subjects
in exams.

T O T A L: 19

[ ] You own a car in your fam.
[x] You usually don't fight with your
parents. (I try my bestest..)
[ ] You are happy with your
appearance/looks. (no. I AM FAT. ): )
[ ] You aren't self-conscious at all.
[x] You have friends.
[x] Your parents working salary monthly
is more than $4000.
[x] You know your parents care
and love you.

T O T A L: 23

[ ] You know what is going on in the
world. (you're talking to someone who only reads life and urban =/)
[x] You care about so many people.
[x] You are happy with your life. (right now, kinda (: )
[x] You usually aren't sick.
[x] You know more than one language.
[x] You have a screen name.
[x] You've gotten
awards/prizes/trophies before.
[x] You know the words to more than 5
songs. (choir songs ! hahaha)
[ ] You dont have any enemies at all. (HAHAHAHA !)
[x] You are Happy that you're living.

T O T A L: 31


So according to this lame questionnaire, I am 62% happy. Oh wow. Lols, what nonsense. I wish I wasn't plagued with monetary woes and joblessness. ): Not that I want to work but just that I HAVE to. Bahness. My speaker is being quite screwy, some weird static going on. But yay for the beach boys' Barbara Ann, I love love happy songs. (: And stevie wonder's isn't she lovely. Hahaha, they were used on scrubs. (:

When kiki leaves, she'll probably only be back in june 2008. NOOOOOOOOOOO !!!! No no no no no ): ): ): TALK ABOUT MAJOR SADNESS HOWWWW. ): Ayesss. We have to have to go out.. Bleagh. Am probably meeting xunny, qua and mich to check out the borders job. It really sucks how I spend about 4 bucks a day on transport. C'mon LTA, I'm jobless !!! Is this really a necessary measure to to induce a multipled increase in national income ? Wth mans. But yeah, as I was saying, am not too keen on borders because I'm unsure of the job hours and the pay is not fantastic. Even though I get to work around books and all. Hrmmms.. I need a five day work week now that I've decided to commit to the combined ajalumni and amadeus choir concert. Practice is every sunday at siglap, grimace. Transport is now a major factor, blah.

Anyways, adel just told me that there's an inter jc prom pageant thingy at zouk this saturday and I'm quite keen. Haha, except for the 20 dollar cover charge and the fact that char, pong and ahhuay may not be able to make it. But 730 to 1030's not too bad so yeah, hopefully db will go too.. I really do hope her dog's okay..

Queerly and quite sadly, haha, shaun, aloy and I didn't go check out the suntec arcade today. Hurhur, he went to meet his friend who is not a guy and who is part of his class clique. Lols, and we didn't try stalking him, sadly. HAHA. Though we did try the turn around and wave thing ! But he was in starbucks, so dang. Hahaha, I totally can't make it as a PI man. Did a lot of walking today haha but it was quite nice and I hope I lost weight. =X Lols.

Okays anyway, I should try to go to sleep. Shall read for awhile, (: Am only about halfway through A Complicated Kindness but I like it, it's quirky and different. I still want to watch Stranger Than Fiction, rahh ! Damn, I need money, fast. Ayes, hopefully everyone had a great first day including miss tan ming xia, heh. (:

Counting the hours..