;forever till forever meets no end

Friday, June 30, 2006

♥ 1:58 AM

I love captain napalm. (:

Hahaha. If you must know, it's one of Calvin's alter egos though I don't remember it. Am talking about Calvin and Hobbes. I love love love the comic. ((: <3 It's simple yet very philosophical at the same time. And it makes me smile anyway. (: (: But it was discontinued in 1995. ): Anyhow, I'd love one of the comicbooks for my birthday though my brother already has a few.

Life is good. I cleaned out my cupboard, read my book and slept. Hehe. Meaning I didn't do any work. =/ Procrastinates. Lols. But yes yes, I'm enjoying myself. Heh. Going out with db tomorrow, hoho. Can't wait ! (: No one knows what time choir is on saturday. Lols.

Ooh and I like my new layout. It's more compact. The picture, believe it or not, was taken in our school hall. It was during choir camp. Heh, nice eh ? And yup, the lyrics are Matchbox 20's Bright Lights.

I just love wikipedia, hoho. Okay I know tomorrow will be a better day. (:

you're my quiet satellite

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

♥ 11:58 PM

Hella gooood.

That's how it feels now that the cts are over. (: He he he he. Adel finished the earliest. Econs was just.. retarded. The exact question I asked yt in the morning came out. Just that when I asked her I was all oh who cares whatever about it. Lols. Didn't have time to finish essay and drq. I think I'm very very lucky. Took one look and realised I had to do the rocks essay because there was a inselberg drq. But the essay questions were doable and thank God I read up (sorta) on those areas before hand. Nyahh stupid slopes didn't come out luckily.

Between papers we went to eat at NYP. Tmx is MAD. MAD I tell you. She was telling us about the volleyball bikini game and talking about breasts and sizes and stuff. LOLS. Funny she is. Then we started talking about barbies and clothes and ahh funny nonsense, heh. Wl is mad also. Was getting so high on the bus and laughing about the spongebob movie. Lols.

I need need need to go shopping. BAD. Was visiting the mango, forever21 and topshop online stores. Hahahah, I want to buy stuff and try on clothes and where is my moooolahh. I wonder if the sale is still on. Let's see what's so in right now. Pinstripes. Above knee length ish pants. Nautical. Polka dots. Bows, at the right places. Prints. Lace. Okay I don't know am going mad. Hahaha. Just that we need to go like erm buy stuff. Lols.

Okay have to start on the geog and history presentations tomorrow. Did I mention monday's youth day ? So I have 5 school free days ! For the moment, LIFE IS GOOD. Hahahahaha.

Say goodnight and go

♥ 12:04 AM

The sino soviet split ?

WADDE !??!?!?!?!?!?!

Some thanks.

Cng is evil evil evil. My hands were dying. Wrote less than 2.5 sides of CRAP for the supposed China essay. Rawrr. Whatever mans. Econs is killing me. I bet I won't remember 90% of the stuff I 'studied'. Oh and mcq will be a laughing matter. Hahahaha. Geog no hope. I don't like physical argh rawrr. I've given up on rocks and landforms. Honestly, rocks and SLOPES !? Bye bye common tests. Less than 16 hours to freedom. Temporary freedom, heh. Unfortunately, I have the history project and all my holiday homework. (geog, history, gp.....) PBBBBFFFFTTTT. Kill the school.

Interesting. As of the 64th minute, the Brazillians have 44% ball possession as compared to Ghana. And either Spain or France (I hope it's Spain) will meet Brazil so that means that neither Spain nor France have a shot at the finals. Hahaha. How optimistic. But anyway, tis quite unfair. The people who decided on the fixtures are very sneaky. It's probably going to be a Germany/Argentina-Brazil final. Sadly Deco won't be playing the England Portugal match this saturday ayes.

Ayes rubbish I hate school. Oh and Cng has given birth, hurhur. Someone go tell markmark and jasper. They want to terrorise the baby. =/ Haha. I want to marry a rich man and we can migrate to Britain or Australia. Then I'll spend the rest of my life shopping at Harrods or something. Okay quick I want a hot rich caucasian for my birthday. Then I can just stop studying econs/geog/history and instead maybe study the art of fine dining. HAHA.

Come what may.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

♥ 12:15 AM

I miss Ed. ): Does cable have Ed ? ): Come back Ed. ):

Gp is as good as dead. Thanks to the summary that was supposed to I repeat supposed to save my ass. Oh ho hum. How many ways can you spell doom ? G e o g h i s t e c o n s. Rah rah. 40 hours more. Sigh. Can't wait. I just feel utterly restless and miserable. Sulks.

Wth. Italy scored the only goal in the 95th minute. Penalty by Totti. Poor poor Australia. They should've won. ):

Am reading Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. It's quite funny a bunch of stories about this gay dude. Haha. And of all the words to add to a vocab, xk had to learn promiscuous. Lols, funny he is.

Okay going to wake up bright and early tomorrow for some last minute history cramming. I know tomorrow's not going to be a good day but what the hell. I need to get through it to get to wednesday. Bleagh.

Yes yes. I'm going to work soooooo much harder after this. Okay fine, after xiamen. But in the meantime, I'll just have to be dandy in apts..

Sunday, June 25, 2006

♥ 11:09 PM

Just around 8 hours till the first paper.

The sad but duh news is that Germany is proceeding to meet Argentina. ): Sweeeeden, ayes. Usually no one frets about econs. But I'm feeling jittery. I've only covered the tectonics part which means there's still weathering and slopes. Okaaayy, I know ZERO about slopes. At least we did a weathering drq.. Peltier's curve ? Or is it Hjulstrom's curve ? Oops. Hahaha. And there is the Philip's curve (inverse relationship between inflation and unemployment) and the J effect (something to do with the short and long run effects of elasticity). HAHAHAHA. I hate econs. It's driving me crazy. If only I could take just history, geography and gp. No scratch that. If I could just take geog alone. Blahhh. Oh and I can't believe I'm saying this.

I feel like doing maths.

Ahhhaahaha. Funny, this is. And here's this thing in reader's digest. It provided the answers to 25 of life's biggest queries. One of it was 'Why does summer zoom by and winter drag on forever ?' Because context defines experience. Albert Einstein once said that when you court a girl, an hour seems like a second. But when you sit on a cinder, a second seems like an hour. Haha. Fascinating ayes ? 'How do you know when to end a friendship ?' As soon as you get the sneaking suspicion that it never really began. And finally my favourite, 'Is money the root of all evil ?' No. Greed is. Elvis nailed this one when he said, 'Sharing money is what gives it its value.' (: (:

And can someone tell me the link between BOP and exchange rate ? I just don't seem to get it. All the links. And I hope cng doesn't ask us about the arms control treaties negotiations process. I'll just die ayes. As it is I can't even remember the provisions. It'll just be like, ceilings on arms for all of them. Bleagh. Oh I like the NPT the best though. Hehehe.

Oh wait, this is funny. I'm quoting the England Ecuador matchcast.

'Curiously now the loudest cheer is 'Deutschland Deutschland !' from the German fans. The England fans have responded with a rendition of 'God Save the Queen' !'

Hahahhaa. Some random. Oh, Joanna (choir senior not cool bananas joa haha) is in Miss Singapore World I think. Hehe. Oh and a sad sad sad sad sad piece of news. According to sally, it's quite confirmed that Kiki is leaving to study abroad next year. ))): I bet mich, xunny, jema and graces will too. SADNESS. ): It'll be P(8-5). There'll only by qua sally and I. ):

Everyone remind me to bring my calculator on wednesday. Bye bye common tests. Meet my friend denial.

I doubt tomorrow will be a better day. But may it be so anyways..

♥ 2:02 AM

Approximately 30 hours. Weeps.

I hate econs it's making me damn depressed. HAHAHAHHAA. Am too tired and sick of econs to care much anymore. I've neglected geography and history. Don't even get me started about gp. Hahahahahha. Depressing. I can't wait for wednesday and it hasn't even started. Let me see. First stop giordano. HAHAHAHA. I think I'm mad. Dreaming. Distracted half the time. No one is going to believe how long I spent on market failure. Oh but I watched the later half of the pink panther. HILARIOUS. Hahahaha. Hamburger ! Numchucks ? LOLS.

Okay. I was daydreaming about how I want to open a pet shop or animal sanctuary. Herrick was laughing at me as usual. Lols, whatever ! Am going mad.

Okay. The above is for shaun the silly cow. Thanks for the econs help ! :D I think it's quite a feat trying to teach me. Haha. (:(: Though I don't think I'll pass either way. Lols. I hope I'll be free next sunday.

The whole day I've been telling everyone,

que sera sera
what will be, will be.

I say that quite often haha. Resigned to fate and divine intervention. But yeah, if it's God's will, it'll happen. And coincidentally, gwei mentioned it in his blog. Heh. Another thought provoking quote,

hope is the cause of disappointment

Makes sense right ? Without high expectations, you won't be hit as hard when you get the results. Okay denial again but yeah. Sigh.

As always, I close with
may tomorrow be a better day, hurhur.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

♥ 12:52 AM

Dammit. Just over 48 hours. My family went to sentosa today but I stayed home. Read through the UN notes and made notes on the limitations of monetary supply, trade 3 and half of trade 4. I've had enough of econs. YUCK. ): I think I've forgotten all there is to know about the arms race. Eeks. I. Don't. Like.

A random piece of trivia. The G-77 (group of 77) has 132 member countries. Hurhur.

Anyway, how does one study for GP ? Argh. Ocm is going to be so disappointed. Lols. Not that he isn't already. Looks like it's back to the apts list for me. I'm not even sure what stands for. Arts people that suck ? Erpx. Okay, have to finish summarising trade 4 then move on to ROG 1 & 2 tomorrow. Hopefully I can finish the arms race and china summary. Blah, too much to ask. Econs sucks.

Oh am at the 4 million smiles site. I'm going to ask zy for his nric so I can see the photo they took of him, hurhur. Less than a month to xiamen. I must remember to take a GAZILLION photos. If not I'll regret like I did last time. ): All that scenery in europe.. Beautiful. Ayes. And I want to go to a proper beach. With really nice white, fine sand and clear aquamarine waters. With a real horizon too. One that stretches forever and isn't dotted with ships/neighbouring islands. Mmms. Like those gold coast beaches ! I LOVE ! (: The weather there is lovely lovely. Our reclaimed ones can't really compare sadly. But they're quite nice all the same. Here I am already thinking about taking a holiday. When the holidays (what holidays ???) are going to end in less than 48 hours. SIGH.

I think some people are quite lucky. God is giving them a chance, a choice. Now it's in their hands. Haha. It's a tough one I admit. But if I were that person, I'd take it. I know when one door closes another opens. But sometimes such opportunities come only once. And even if it doesn't work out, hey, even then you've learnt a lesson. It sure beats banging down other doors and smashing windows while waiting.

Haha. May tomorrow be a better day !

Friday, June 23, 2006

♥ 12:40 AM

1800-I-DON'T-WANT-SCHOOL-TO-REOPEN-GOD-PLEASE-HELP-ME

To borrow Fatima's ever so appropriate hotline. ))): I absolutely hate econs. I wish we didn't have mcq. I have ZERO content for gp also. I am considering disregarding slopes altogether.

Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.
Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.
Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.
Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.

It's funny how one moment you can be totally carefree and the next you're choking. Funny thing is, you're just empty inside. A void.

My mind/brain's just this sieve with huge pores. Everything I read, skim through falls carelessly through this sieve and collects nowhere. It just.. evaporates along its way down to nothingness.

This feeling really sucks. I feel paralysed somehow. There is no more difference between needing and wanting. Everything is just this huge blank.

BLANK. Like that. White. Clean. Spotless. Sterile. Empty. Nothing.

I know I know. This lack.. I have no one but myself to blame. Ayes. Not that I'm even trying to find an excuse or console myself. There is no other option. Okay I think my mind is running away from all this panic and am not thinking straight.

Life goes on. But why do things only get harder ?

Thursday, June 22, 2006

♥ 1:39 AM

1. Kwei didn't blow up during choir. It was a surprisingly short practice. I felt we needed more. But hrms okays.

2. Xianhui is funny. She said the shirt kwei wore today made him look like an italian petrol station attendent. GUFFAWS. How true. I have the funniest juniors. YAWNZ. HAHAHAHAHA.

3. Had a late lunch with zx, xk (xiaokang), sc (the silly cow otherwise known as shaun), nessa, pyong, yenyen and xinying (is her name correct ? lols). Ooh and I dared xk to buy lover fruit ice blended. HAHA. Like wadde right ? It was mint green in colour but according to him it tasted good, haha.

4. Ooh I almost forgot my UN notes.

THANKEWS NESSA DEAREST !

(: Sorry, my handphone is perpetually on silent. =/

5. Tried in vain to study at amk library with sc and xk. Those two ah. Hang out too much already. =/ Haha, then xk misplaced his wallet but got it back eventually. Haha. He's another silly cow.

6. Didn't do anything. Though I did receive valuable insight from mei. ((:

Mei ! Thank you loads ! Love love !

7. Finished reading Kafka on the Shore. Beams ! I highly recommend it ! It's like I pretty much get the tiny details.. But I don't get the whole picture. And it's really philosophical mmms. Haha. Okay, after the CTs am going to borrow more of his books.

8. Okay. I want to buy that green striped giordano top. Noooooo. Bad.

9. At this rate I don't think I'll be able to meet the stalkers on friday. Boo. Damn. Damn sad. ):

10. This is also quite random but I saw a rainbow at NYP today. Prettay ayes :D I shared it with xk and nessa hehe.

11. Clara called today ! Haha, wanted to know if she should try the dsa audition tomorrow. Waha, she's really mad.. She's the epitome of a true Cedarian. Methinks. I miss Clara !

12. Project runway, I like ! Haha. I always wish I could be a designer. That's probably why I envy Sooks..

13. Policeman ! And a lot of potential ! Hahaha. :P

Okay rah. Numbering my points isn't so fun after all. But I like colours ! Haha. Okay. Am going crazy. In the words of gpt, 4 more days.

LIKE OMFG.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

♥ 11:59 PM

Oh, really weird dream. Was with the other altos and mdm woon was auditioning our 'longest time'. Lols. And I for some reason was singing the alto as well as the solo part. And she was writing the criticisms on the board. Lols.

♥ 11:30 PM

Blah day. Not very productive. Spent most of today reading/napping. HRMPHS. Choir tomorrow. Hmms. We'll see how it goes. Finished trade 4 and about done with USSR. Didn't bother with the first part ie. Khruschev, Brezhnev, Stalin, Andropov, Chernenko.. Hope she doesn't ask about comparing soviet leaders hrms.

The book is really quite addictive, am halfway through. Currently the score for the Germany vs Ecuador match stands at 3-0. Klose scored two. Haha, he's still my man ! Okay, going to read Waugh tomorrow. Cripes, the urbanisation chapter is 50 pages long. Lord help me. ):

Read a bit about Ping Pong diplomacy. One of the key players, Zhuang Zedong ! Haha. Funny right.

I want to buy the Electrico album mmms. Argh, why do I have to care about slopes ? It seems like a sneaky topic that they'd set. Ayes. Whatever. Tired. Have to wake up early tomorrow. May tomorrow be a good day haha..

♥ 1:47 AM

Pick me. Choose me. Love me.
-Meredith Grey

♥ 1:18 AM

I just love scrubs. (((: Fake it till you make it ! Hahaha. It's just hilarious. Grey's Anatomy is so nice too. (((: Ahhh. I love monday nights. Am watching Frasier now. (((: A dose of One Tree Hill would complete the night, hehe.

Okay. Only finished trade 3 today. I know I know. About 5 days more. ))): But I forgot I had piano today ! And ahh, it's tv night. Kate Bosworth is pretty and her brown/blue eyes make her even more stunning. And I just like Kevin Spacey ! Coolness, heh. He's lex luthor. I happen to like Smallville's lex too. Quite hot, with his baldness.

Oh and a piece of useless trivia. There are SEVEN players on the Ukrainian soccer team with Andriy as their first name. Haha.

Am reading Kafka on the Shore now. ((: Seriously, books like that will be my undoing. I'll just read all day and disregard every other pressing concern. Eg. Studying, my ONLY present pressing concern. SIGH. Blah.

Mei, I'm quite okay with urbanization I think. But I haven't really done much with rocks. Must we know slope stuff ? ARGH. And I just thought Flusty & Dear sounded quite cute. Haha.
Yes zy ! Haha, I like that part too. And many other parts. But unlike you, not for sadistic reasons haha..
Yeah gerald.. It's so hard to find hot, considerate guys.. Especially in Singapore. Lols.
You're just dying to date them lah aggie ! Waha. Yes yes we should just be contented with johnny and orlando and ewan and hugh and jake..

Haha. Since I don't have piano and I've run out of time and excuses, may tomorrow be a better day ! Oh and I share the same sentiments as gpt. About people who try so hard to make it seem as though they don't study. Whatever mans. Pbbbffft. I wish I had photographic memory. Or like, could study through osmosis. Sigh. The world is unfair. Haha.

Must finish trade 4 and start on UN/USSR. Scratch that, I should finish UN/USSR. Bleagh. Please please please don't let me fail gp. I hate moe. Kill moe.

Monday, June 19, 2006

♥ 2:27 AM

A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain.
-Abraham Cowley

♥ 2:05 AM

I hope Australia beat Croatia and move on to the next round. Judging from the play by play, they were quite solid against Brazil. Mmm.. And Japan and Croatia played to a goal-less draw so I'd say that Australia has a chance. Though anything can happen.. Shakes head at the Czech republic. I think group H matches won't be that interesting.. The countries are quite ulu, haha.

Finally finished with Urbanization. Major zzzz. But didn't manage to start on Trade 3. Hrmph. I'm hoping to finish that tomorrow and start on UN. Less than a week, argh ! Sigh sigh sigh.

I'm finished with Like Life and needless to say, I didn't get a thing. Or rather I didn't get the many things from the different stories. Hmmms. I'm reading Confessions of a Hollywood Star now. Haha, sometimes we all need a little chick lit.

Oh yes, and I've learnt interesting new words. I just heart wikipedia ! Hoho. Ennui and limerence. Ruz wants to have a stalkers lunch on friday but I doubt we can make it. ): I hope Justin had a very happy birthday :D As long as he's satisfied with his performance, haha.

That 35 girl has yet to pay me ! ARGH. I can be 15 dollars richer, hmphs. There's practice on wednesday, shivers. Less than a month to go to Xiamen. I forgot to mention also that on saturday, ttoh was very very DRUNK. He was wearing a shirt that said 'drunk' and was acting like some pedo-homo-frog-cat thing. I don't know. Haha, nessa and I just kept laughing at him. But yeah, I like practices with him. They're light hearted but we learn things as well..

Okay I shall end here by saying everyone should visit http://www.wikipedia.com and search for limerence. It's intriguing, haha. And it's depressing how my $300 (I don't really remember the price hmmm) creative zen micro HAS DIED and is now rotting away in my cupboard. ARRRRRRRGGGGHHH. Idiot creative. Even my father's no brand one is working ten times better. Sigh, sucks.

Less than a week bel. I hope tomorrow is a better day. Flusty & Dear ! Haha, random.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

♥ 1:20 AM

So much for starting urbanization. Sigh. Another wasted day. Wasted days are usually characterised with practices in the morning/afternoon followed by lunching with choir people and taking long afternoon/evening naps. Blah. So I have had many many MANY wasted days.

Tried in vain to study at the toa payoh library. They have nice reference books though. But little space. I have unpaid fines, rahh. Okay sad news. Czech republic vs Ghana, 0-2. I KNOW ! Like, wadde !? Bah. Was reading the play by play. If I'm not wrong, the czech (is that what you call them ??) need a draw or win over Italy to qualify. Or can they still qualify for the next round with goal difference ? Hrms. Sigh.

Maybe it's because I'm still young that I have relatively less family issues. And they usually are resolved in a matter of days. I'm also fortunate to be close enough to my aunts and grandma. So hmms. Food for thought. It's probably why I rarely discuss family stuff. It's not something that takes centrestage. I mean we all get along fine.. I've learnt to hold my tongue and practice isolationism and all. Ayes. I don't know.

I admit that in some cases I am relatively confrontational. I don't like to take things lying down. I don't know sigh. I hate feeling helpless. Sigh. Studying (or rather not studying) is going nowhere. I feel extremely blah. Less than a week left. Then 72 hours of excrutiating pain. Sigh sigh sigh. I hate school. I hate moe. Sucks.

Sigh. I'm thankful for db really. Yt too. At least we share the same frequency somewhat though we're different in many ways. I miss good company. P8.. ): Especially qua and xunny. Ayes. And mad people like small gangster yizhen and my other half shiying. Sigh sigh. My dearest sister in law too )): Yeah, I stress that they are good company. Lols. They aren't people whom I have to fake laughter with. Shawn and shaun also. (but I seldom get the chance to talk to ahpa, haha) Sigh. I miss people that I just feel right with. Yeah, I'm sorry I have high expectations.

I just miss Cedar. ):

♥ 12:02 AM

Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnny Ray
South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio

Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, Television
North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe

Rosenbergs, H Bomb, Sugar Ray, Panmunjom
Brando, The King And I, and The Catcher In The Rye

Eisenhower, Vaccine, England's got a new queen
Maciano, Liberace, Santayana goodbye

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it

Joseph Stalin, Malenkov, Nasser and Prokofiev
Rockefeller, Campanella, Communist Bloc

Roy Cohn, Juan Peron, Toscanini, Dancron
Dien Bien Phu Falls, Rock Around the Clock

Einstein, James Dean, Brooklyn's got a winning team
Davy Crockett, Peter Pan, Elvis Presley, Disneyland

Bardot, Budapest, Alabama, Khrushchev
Princess Grace, Peyton Place, Trouble in the Suez

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it

Little Rock, Pasternak, Mickey Mantle, Kerouac
Sputnik, Chou En-Lai, Bridge On The River Kwai

Lebanon, Charles de Gaulle, California baseball
Starkwether, Homicide, Children of Thalidomide

Buddy Holly, Ben Hur, Space Monkey, Mafia
Hula Hoops, Castro, Edsel is a no-go

U2, Syngman Rhee, payola and Kennedy
Chubby Checker, Psycho, Belgians in the Congo

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it

Hemingway, Eichman, Stranger in a Strange Land
Dylan, Berlin, Bay of Pigs invasion

Lawrence of Arabia, British Beatlemania
Ole Miss, John Glenn, Liston beats Patterson

Pope Paul, Malcolm X, British Politician sex
J.F.K. blown away, what else do I have to say

We didn't start the fireIt was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it

Birth control, Ho Chi Minh, Richard Nixon back again
Moonshot, Woodstock, Watergate, punk rock

Begin, Reagan, Palestine, Terror on the airline
Ayatollah's in Iran, Russians in Afghanistan

Wheel of Fortune, Sally Ride, heavy metal, suicide
Foreign debts, homeless Vets, AIDS, Crack, Bernie Goetz

Hypodermics on the shores, China's under martial law
Rock and Roller cola wars, I can't take it anymore

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it

Billy Joel's We didn't start the fire. A history lesson in itself and a look at the sad state of the world. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

♥ 12:06 AM

I met slin at the airport today. ((: I passed her my squeaky clean, never touched before maths tys. Studied till 4ish at BK. I like the airport, I want to go there again. Erm though I doubt there's time for recreation before the 22nd. So much has changed though. But yes, it was nice talking to her even though it was not for long. What happened to our stalkers outing ruz !? LOLS. She's a funny girl, ntuc.

Talked to my darling bimbo senior the other day. I miss her ! And her sunshiney loud bimbotic pinkness ! Not that she was ever very pink but yes. Heh. She's nice nice nice. I remember taking a walk with her in the park opposite hotel flora in olomouc. It was so pretty, so serene. (:

Yt and I were talking about our types over msn. The types of girls we liked. Lols, result of being in an all girls school haha. Was reading my history notes and I came across 'destruction before construction', with reference to the cultural revolution. So that prompted me to search 'deconstruction' on wikipedia. I always hear it on project runway anyway. But yeah what I found was some funny weird analysis of texts thingy. Okay, it's tons more complicated than that. But I linked around and started reading about freud which led me to carl jung. And I found something quite fascinating.

'Jung identified the anima as being the unconscious feminine component of men and the animus as the unconscious masculine component in women. (Many modern day Jungian practitioners believe that every person has both an anima and an animus). Jung stated that the anima and animus act as guides to the unconscious unified Self, and that forming an awareness and a connection with the anima or animus is one of the most difficult and rewarding steps in psychological growth.

Oftentimes, when people ignore the anima or animus complexes, the anima or animus vies for attention by projecting itself onto others. This explains, according to Jung, why we are sometimes immediately attracted to certain strangers: we see our anima or animus in them. Love at first sight is an example of anima and animus projection.'

Yup, from wikipedia. How fascinating right ? Hurhur. See, the things that I do instead of study. Philosophy and psychology are really extremely complex. You know, I realised I don't quite like things I don't understand. Like, as much as I enjoy the language used in the book of short stories I'm reading now, the style is quite disjointed and abstract. There is no real solid plot (granted it's not a novel) and at the end of every story, I just wonder aloud, huh ? So what ? It leaves me feeling quite empty. And I just don't like not understanding stuff. So yeah, hrmmms. As much as psychology and philosophy are intriguing, my inability to understand the concepts, to see things in black and white, annoys me.

Hmmms. Rants, sometimes I just am quite random. I don't even get myself. Conscious, sub conscious, unconscious. Hrms. Am quite near the end of my book. Oh and I finished 5 and a half sets of china notes. Hoho. So I can finish china tomorrow and start urbanization. Argentina thrashed and I mean T H R A S H E D Serbia and Montenegro 6-0. Group C is really the group of death mans.

Ahh wells, choir tomorrow. I hope I wake up on time. Throat is not really in any better shape. Croak. Gpt and nessa are funny. He's just jealous right nessa ? Hehe. And either way, I DON'T GO FOR YOUNGER GUYS. Lols. I want to play squash. Someone play squash with me. Don't think anyone's going for justin's thing tomorrow. I feel guilty. Erpx, not going for his bbq either. Just a week left ! SIGH. It's not half time yet but the score between the Netherlands and the Ivory Coast is 2-0. Mmm. Erm, go Australia ! Haha.

But sugar don't forget what you already know.

Friday, June 16, 2006

♥ 1:53 AM

Thank goodness for Crouch and Gerrard. Two seriously last minute goals. Maybe they only play well under pressure. Lols. Not that I am watching the game. Damn, I wish I had sctv. Haha.

♥ 1:04 AM

Another wasted 24 hours. Only finished ROG3 and part of ROG4. Bummed around the house. The usual. Zzzz. Blah, oh I just realised justin's thingy is this saturday. Have to ask the girls what the plan is. My throat hurts. Sucks. Don't think it'll be alright by saturday morning. Sigh. I hope I recover by wednesday though.

I bet it's food or nothing.

Argh, stupid pimple outbreak. Plate tectonics on my face man, rawrr. I think it's the weather and the late nights. Blah. After the common tests I'm going to have to go china trip shopping, hurhur. Nuts, I'm always dreaming and making such statements. Was reading through past entries. Ahh. Reminiscing. Time really flies. I found our joint blog. Lols, it's been almost 5 months. England and Trinidad and Tobago are still nil nil. Sheesh, what's up with England ?? Ahh wells. Ooh chinese show with tony leung (:

Must finish ROG4 and start on China. Argh, have been neglecting geog. Sigh. Screw the school mans. Oh, and I watched the olomouc video. Haha, pockets has a girlfriend also in the choir ! Nessa is nuts ! Rooming with her will be fun fun fun I can foresee. (:

I admit, not just yet.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

♥ 12:28 AM

I missed the opportunity
to get you babe to stay with me.
Never thought,
I'd regret the excuses that I've made
like a song,it will fade

If there's music in the night,
And it's really, really right,
It's the only thing I need.
It intoxicates your mind
All your troubles left behind
So come on and take my lead.
It's not just me who feels it
Music plays a mind trick
Watch me forget about missing you

So i put my feelings out to dry
Love, one day again,
I'll have to try.
Falling out, making up
It seems such a silly game
Why do i never gain

Jamie Cullum's Mind Trick.

As everyone can see, I didn't accomplish anything today. ARGH. Had a macs breakfast at compasspoint with db. Then we walked around and tried on clothes in metro and looked at the toys. Haha, db is deprived. She wanted to buy a remote controlled car. I, her conscience, said no. Tried two nice tops, both below 15 dollars. Shall get them another day, hopefully. Then we tried on shoes and went to bk. Stayed there till around 4 trying to study. Haha. Got two sets of geog notes done. Not that they were very long. And I didn't get quite abit. Rah. Then we went to ps and tried the arcade games. Hurhurhur. The shooting ones and bishi bashi and the racing ones. Hoho. (: Should do that again. Though it's quite brainless. I think. Then we tried on more clothes at mphosis. I want to buy stuff ! (: I like their designs. Simple but different. Honestly, I bet all the changing room people want to ban us from their stores. We spend all the time in the world giggling and taking nonsense photos. Lols.

Spain beat Ukraine (is it ?) 4-0 ! Alonso, Villa, Villa, Torres. Mmms. Well done ! The french drew the swiss and brazil only managed a 1-0 with croatia. Ah wells..

Oh, we went to the library too and I borrowed Kafka on the Shore and Lorrie Moore's Like Life, a collection of short stories. Hurhur. I hope I can find time to read amidst TRYING to cram for the s t u p i d common tests.

Afternoon pe tomorrow. Everyone say ergh sucks. Blah. Whatever, may tomorrow be a better day ! Meaning, finishing ROG 3 and going through China. Bleagh. Screw screw screw common tests.

In a course of a lifetime, what does it matter ?

I like walk two moons alot. (: I want to go to sentosa but am really afraid of the sun erpx. Ayes. No more holidays already. Sucks. Sucks. Sucks. Where did the past three weeks go ? ARRRRGGGHH. Oh and some woman is just damn cunning. It's a bitter laughter kind of thing, haha. We'll see. Whatever.

Watch me forget about missing you.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

♥ 11:11 PM

'YOU SHOULD WATCH IT! EVEN IF YOU HATE FOOTBALL! COS HIS GOAL WILL MAKE YOU LOVE FOOTBALL! It'll bring about World Peace! It'll convince the U.S to give up 0.7% of their GNP to the least developing countries! It'll soften the hearts of every evil person on earth! It'll urge all the teachers to set ridiculously easy common tests for their students- BECAUSE ROSICKY'S GOAL IS JUST THAT TERIFFIC .'

To quote darling ftm's on Rosicky's second goal, haha. (: Darn ! I really wish I have scv. Then again, if I did, I'd be watching soccer like non stop. Rawrr. Korea beat Togo 2-1. Lols. I'm an underdog supporter. Go third world nations ! Haha, right.

Today was a wasted day. SERIOUSLY. Wasted. Wasted. Wasted. Went for choir but didn't sing because my throat was bad. Couldn't speak in the morning, haha. Then didn't do afternoon pe either because of choir. Sigh. Then we played some quite fun basketball game. Considering my aversion to the sport altogether because of my inability to shoot, I think 15 points isn't too bad (: 3 baskets from the penalty line hehs. I still prefer netball/captain's ball. Must play one day ! Yup, then we had dinner at amk. Yt, yl, dj, markmark, jasper and I. See. I told you. Wasted day. Sigh sigh sigh.

我不难过
这不算什么
只是为什么眼泪会流
我也不懂

How rare right ? Hurhur. But this song caryn did during the semis or something. So yeah.. It's a really nice sad song too. Though I can't say it applies to me at all, I like the lyrics. (: Stefanie Sun's 我不难过.

Oh I have to say this. It's not everyday I get an ego boost. I wanted to know why mark asked if I thought I was naturally intelligent. (no.. I'm naturally modest, haha).

and just stay here in this moment for the rest of time says:
i think you are

Hoho ! Critics, take that ! Haha, going slightly nuts. The lack of studying is taking its toll on me. Blah. Don't you think koalas are adorable ? They are just cuddly tree huggers who spend half their lives sleeping mmms. I want one to hug haha. I caught a beetle. It was terrorising me. Disgusting. I have this intense urge to play squash and go carolling. Volunteer your squash court today. Call 1800-BEL. Haha. I'm waiting for my 2000yen souvenir. Random. Was singing 'If you see an alligator, don't forget to scream AAAAH !'. Haha, I think yt was afraid of me. Ayes, my brother keeps lying on my bed, pretending that he's in the posturepedics ad. Right.

Okay, off to finish off the last morsel of ROG2. Who cares about the moho discontinuity mans ? I hope I get more things done tomorrow. Goodnight and goodbye.

Give me a sign. Any sign.
In my favour of course. Haha.

♥ 1:06 AM

Oh I forgot to add. Markmark and jasper are recruiting revolutionaries ! Haha, to change the local choral scene. Fascinating. He was talking about singing fun songs outside kwei's shadown. Lols. Braaadders ! (:

♥ 12:39 AM

I feel sick. ): Didn't do anything today. ): ): Actually we didn't do much during the workshop. Just tried o magnum mysterium. Haha, HARD ! But quite nice. (: Did circle of life also. We can't do the transposed part. Haha. Christina's hongkong cousin is hilarious.

Markmark: What are you doing here ?
Cousin: What are YOU doing here ?
Markmark: Who are you ?
Cousin: I am your future ! Your destiny !

LOLS. Funny, hurhur. Xiaokai did the lion king solo, hurhur. Novo is really good. I especially enjoyed Longest Time ayes. (: After that we ate at ps and yt and I forced xiaokang to have dinner with us. Lols. Had a nice conversation with him. He's such a good chap, hurhur. (: Popped by yt's house and watched a bit of super band before watching Japan vs Australia at rivervale. Argh, I was feeling quite tired and cranky. Had a headache the whole day. But anyways, Australia won 3-1 ! They scored two goals within the last 15 minutes man. Lols, I gave up on them midway. It was quite tyco anyway. The passing was sloppy and play was messy. Ah mmms.

There's choir and remedial pe tomorrow. BOO SUCKS I feel sick zzz. I hate the common tests argh. It's time I start on geography. Sigh sigh sigh.

Apparently he's not short of suitors.
Rahhh. ):

Monday, June 12, 2006

♥ 1:55 AM

Just about finished the arms race. All those provisions are confusing. SIGH. Not very sure about START. Ceiling on warheads of 6000 ? Hmmms. Am about halfway through ROG 2. Went to uncle ronnie's house today to see baby Joel. ((: I'm an aunt ! Haha, I feel quite old. He's so cute. Then again, all babies are cute. I prefer toddlers with fuzzy hair mmms.

Netherlands vs Serbia and Montenegro 1-0. Goal by Robben. Mexico thrashed Iran 3-1. Mmms. Yl, yt, dj and markmark are watching at amk macs. I want to know what time Australia is playing Japan SINGAPORE TIME. That means +800. Blah.

Workshop tomorrow. Throat is quite horrible. Not sure if I'm going. Heard that there's free lunch though. Hmms. I want to finish ROG 2 and continue history. For some reason I am not in the mood to study geography. Which is bad. I mean, slope processes ? Wth.

God only knows why Man is like that. Sigh. ):
I pray.

I'm in the mood for ice cream. I feel like having an earthquake at swensen's. Just had baked rice the other day. Mmmms, cheesy goodness. Less than 14 days. SIGH SIGH. ): Apparently p8 (lols) are studying at pp macs tomorrow. Hmms..

Oh and good news ! Hehe. Thanks to the new relay system, I am the second to know stuff ! (alphabetical, after qua, hehe.. poor xunny) Graces is finally attached to Kenneth ! The chairman ! Hehe, yay her ! ((:

PTEN HOSPITAL
Chairman - Chairman
GP - Qua
Gynae (dunno how to spell) - Graces
Medical Social Worker - Sally
Radio/physio Therapist - Mich
Occupational Therapist - Jema
Speech Therapist - Christabel, not Jema
Vet - Kiki
Sexologist (spell?) cum marriage counselor - Xunny!
Male nurse - e****
Female nurse - e****
Patient - our grandparents etc
Toilet cleaner - tessa
Flower shop aunty - imoan(:

HAHAHAHA. Jema came up with that, lols. Funny. I think imoan shouldn't even be the flower shop aunty mans. She should be the toilet cleaner's assistant. Or the co toilet cleaner. Haha. Reminds me of scrubs. Co resident.

Hehe, I want to watch the first season of frasier. It's at my grandma's house rawrr. We have sectionals on tuesday too ayes. Oh I forgot to mention two weird dreams I had. The first a few nights ago was at the yck bus interchange with the choir people. For some reason we were celebrating sook's birthday ! Hahaha, oh man. I miss her. And serene was there too. I was using fabric paint to design her present, lols. Then the scene changed to me looking at shaun's msn and seeing tys online. Waha ! If only that could really happen. Can't quite remember what's after that. The other dream was at my grandma's place which had become some sort of haunted house. Though it wasn't dark and scary or anything. Haha. And the funny thing was, two of the patrons were ngps and wtan ! LOLS. They went together. So funny and weird. Haha, interesting dreams.

Baby it's alright
it's only us.

(: Such a happy sounding song. Robbie Williams.

Sunday, June 11, 2006

♥ 12:20 AM

I'm falling sick that's for sure. And I napped for 5 hours. There is something seriously wrong with my body clock. Maybe it's to make up for the time I could've used sleeping during lectures. Right.

Sook is going for the coldplay concert. Unfair. Her seats cost over a hundred dollars. I want a hundred dollars for a new phone. Ho hum. Just heard from cg that the tp male chorus is in the olomouc finals. Ahh, it was just last year..

You know, I used to like to tell my sister that it's true, I don't like choir. I just like singing. The latter part still holds true today but I don't know whether I'm feeling any differently about the first part. I'm trying I guess. I think.

You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

Our memories
Well, they can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands I sit and cry

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts (no, no, no)
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

It's all ending
I gotta stop pretending who we are...
You and me I can see us dying...are we?

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts (no, no, no)
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't tell me cause it hurts
I know what you're saying
So please stop explaining

Don't speak,
don't speak,
don't speak,
oh I know what you're thinking
And I don't need your reasons
I know you're good,
I know you're good,
I know you're real good
Oh, la la la la la la La la la la la la
Don't, Don't, uh-huh
Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush don't tell me tell me cause it hurts
Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush darlin'
Hush, hush don't tell me tell me cause it hurts

Yeah. You were a really really close friend then. Or at least I thought you were. Sigh. I miss p10. Xunny, qua, michy, graces, jema, kiki, sally.. Even ethel and elvis. Gosh it's been ages since I last spoke to ethel.

Today was uneventful. I quite like ttoh mmms. And the third row just can't stop talking ! Bahhs. I don't think I'll be going to sentosa with them. Missed xiaokang's speech, haha. I want to go to ikea. England vs Paraguay 1-0. Wth, paraguay scored an own goal. England is underperforming ! Not that I watched but I heard it was a boring match.

It's interesting (I think I've mentioned it before but who cares) how I can talk to some people online but not in real life and vice versa. Some people are just quite.. dull online. Or maybe it's just me.. Hard to talk I guess. Hmmms.

Twinks just has this cute toothy grin. I like rabbits so sue me.

I feel like going to the playground near cedar to sit on the swings. Oh sigh. Go listen to Five for Fighting's Disneyland. (: I found wikipedia's About A Boy quotes (from the movie) utterly hilarious. Remind me to visit the library before I leave for xiamen. I want to borrow the sequel to raven's gate (children's book I know) and the latest adrian mole book. Oh and anything by murakami, haha. I feel like going on a song lyric posting spree. Okay nuts. I like lyrics. Maybe it's just because I like beautiful phrases. Mmms.

Jem's Maybe I'm Amazed is really nice too. From the OC soundtrack. It's been AGES since I've watched an episode from the OC or one tree hill. Ayes ! ): Anyways, the Beatles have a happier version of that sound. Or at least the Beatles always sound somewhat happier. Haha. All these deep, depressing lyrics are encouraging excessive sentimentality. Hrms. Jimmy Eat World's Work. (:

I found this quite cool. When I was researching on my gp outline. Women's suffrage, mmms. Feminism ! Hehe. I was checking just now and I found that I have a thousand plus music files. Which isn't a lot. But I have around 4000 plus picture files. Haha. Oh and I know that this is redundant but my father has this marine fish that is blind in one eye and it's really sad. I refuse to let my brother laugh at it when it swims lopsidedly to its food and misses it. :(

Sooks told me something quite fascinating. Hurhur. Tigger (not that I know him at all lols) is the lead in the film Becoming Royston ! Oh how cool is that. I watched the trailer and it's quite hilarious because he looks lost and bengish, hurhur. Mazzy Star's Into Dust, mmms. (:

Three times already. Somewhat. Frightening coincidence. I can't wait to see zx's ear. Okay the latest update is that neither vc nor the tp male chorus got any votes in the finals. =/ Trinidad and Tobago vs Sweden, 0-0. Ayes Ljungberg what are you doing ! Lols. Reading ftm's blog just makes me laugh and smile and wish I was back in Cedar again. (not that she is there now but you know, the mad company haha) Yt and I are inspired to make a corny video. Lols, we'll see how it goes eh. Hurhur.

Okay I finished compiling the geog group powerpoint and two more sets of arms race notes. I think Argentina just scored against Cote d'Ivoire. Okays, it's half past three and I have piano and econs to read up tomorrow. Rawrr.

Unfortunately
unforgettable.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

♥ 11:30 PM

Baby
Its been a long time coming
Such a long long time
And I can't stop running
Such a long long time
Can you hear my heart beating
Can you hear that sound
Cos I can't help thinking
And I won't stop now

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity pulls on you and me
And then I looked up at the sky and saw the sun
And the way that gravity pushes on everyone
On everyone

Baby
When you're wheel stops turning
And you feel let down
And it seems like troubles
Have come all around
I can hear your heart beating
I can hear that sound
But I can't help thinking
And I won't look now

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity pulls on you and me
And then I looked up at the sky and saw the sun
And the way that gravity pushes on everyone
On everyone
On everyone
On everyone
On everyone
On everyone

- Gravity, Coldplay

Thanks sooks darling. Lovelove. (: (:

♥ 2:16 AM

GERMANY 4 COSTA RICA 2 !!!

Klose is my man !! (: (:

schneider, friedrich, lahm and even though they didn't play, kahn and ballack. woah. :D deutschland ! berlin wall berlin wall !

Friday, June 09, 2006

♥ 11:48 PM

(: (:

C'mon man. It's the season for soccer hunks. Oops. Okay an overstatement there. Hurhur.

♥ 2:19 AM

Oooh, mmms, yummy. ((:

I just love the adidas jose +10 advert. The concept is cool.. South American ghetto is cool. Less than 24 hours to the opening match ! Ballack is not playing though, pity. 3 time german player of the year, or something. (shaun was rattling.. I asked about beckenbauer) I wish I had cable. World Cup ! Cartoons ! Star World ! Discovery Channel ! (kwei and his monkeys, haha)

Good news. Finished 5 sets of arms race notes. (: (: (: That's not to say that I'm ANYWHERE near completion and I'll remember every single important detail. Bah.

Reached school at 1 to try to get studying done. Ended up drooling outside the choir room as I was taking a nap. Didn't start on ROG part 2. Blah. Am a third of the way through the geog project.

Slacked all the way throughout remedial pe. Yay pong ! (: Came to the realisation, (with pong's help) that the priority now shouldn't be holiday homework but rather, studying. Or rather, the priority shouldn't be gp paper 2 of which the answers are online anyway. Ho hum. It's almost 3am ! Oh and since no one EVER wants to have prata with me, I bought my own at jalan kayu. A kosong, one with egg and one with cheese. Mmms, perfect on a rainy day. The weather was nice too. Understandably, I slept for 3 hours.

Have been neglecting geography. Haven't printed notes. Zzzz. Hopefully I'll be able to finish the arms race tomorrow and the rest of the geography project. And watch the opening match. Glee. Which brings me back to how I wish I could have cable since I want to watch obscure teams (like australia) which will never make it to the semis . Hence I won't be able to catch them on bloody free tv. Sigh. The bane of a near public good. No excludibility. Whatever.

Tys is the complete opposite of twinks. I should think. One is shy and aloof. The other is a crap talking loud mouth. Oh but they are both very very smart. Mmms, I like that. Haha.

Downloaded No Doubt's Don't Speak after watching singapore idol. I like No Doubt. I have Rock Steady. Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson is good too. Especially where is your heart and the live version of beautiful disaster. My aunt is taking us out tomorrow. I think I am going for the lunch and the possibility of returning home with new shoes. Hmms.

I got the date wrong, hurhur.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING MICHELLE ! :D :D :D Love !!!

I need a new book. All I have at home are children's books (read, walk two moons. don't get me wrong, I adore children's books) which I have to re read all the time. Finished About A Boy. (: Read something interesting.

Was that really it ? Will wondered. Was that what they were all doing, looking for someone less different ? Was that what he was doing ?

This thing about looking for someone less different... It only really worked, he realized, if you were convinced that being you wasn't so bad in the first place.

Chiang is.. an idiot. One I still find adorable nonetheless. Remind me to buy communist merchandise when I hit the shores of Xiamen. Okay, I doubt it's located anywhere near the coast. Just a figure of speech rah. No wait it is ! Haha. Wikipedia. Okay, their local language is hokkien. Ooh, it's China's cleanest city ! That's great to know, hurhur.

I really should sleep now and stop being so random, blogging about mundane affairs. Though it is all I ever do. Hmm. I blame it on the lack of stimulating, intellectual conversations. Deep and engaging talk is hard to by nowadays. Really. Frivolity. Zzz.

Fool, forget him.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

♥ 12:20 AM

Bel bel bel you've just got got got to try HARDER. Much much harder. And if you think about it, it just doesn't make sense right ? Why not just avoid one to avoid the other ? You know, solve one to solve the other. Induction or whatnot. Unless, unless you don't actually want to solve the second problem. Au contraire, you are living in denial.

Argh, I am living in denial. Sucks.

Why why why ? I don't see the reason either. Someone give me a sign. Or clue me in. There is something seriously wrong with me. I feel like buying shoes and clothes. Hello. This is unhealthy. Bad bad bad for me. We'll see how it goes. According to pong, EIGHTEEN more days. Only. Dingdong, I hate school. Why no connection ayes ? Buzz, annoying. I need something to distract me. Not that I am not already distracted by the WRONG things.

Visit michelle's blog. Eye candy, mmms. (: I miss p10 ! Haha, and I'm going to be a speech therapist !? My life revolves around choir. Rawr. ): Don't screw up bel. Every second that goes by is a second that you won't ever see again. Zzz. Sleeping on it doesn't help. Different day, same set of problems. But ayes. There must be a way. Trouble is, I can hardly find the will.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

♥ 8:52 PM

It's a good thing I didn't bother reading up on econs. It wouldn't have helped anyway. Today's timed ass just showed me how much I didn't know. Ho hum. Lols, tmx was really restless we could tell. I think she was just preoccupied with da chang jin. Hurhur.

door jitna bhi tum mujhse, paas tere mein. ab to aadat si hai mujko aise jeene mein

no matter how far away you are from me, i'm nearby. it is now a habit to live this way.

Preetonut's nick, hehe. It sounds better in hindi right ? Hurhur. I think the distance is not so much physical but rather emotional. The whole so near yet so far and all. Sadness. I caught a glimpse of tys in the courtyard. (hurhur, reminds me of cedar's courtyard.. reminisces..)

I feel like eating prata. Mmm mmm mmm. Why does no one ever want to eat it with me ? Rahh. Just like no one wants to go to the playground with me. Okay, now I feel like eating beef noodles. Hehe. It's ice cream now. Little wonder why I need to go for remedial pe, rahh. Shall try to study history later. Arms race, zzz. Oh, a good friend treated me to lunch today. Thank you thank you. (: Even if it was macs. Grumbles, making me fat only. But shouldn't complain, haha.

Now I feel like going to changi airport to walk around. Funny thoughts. The airport makes me feel quite sad sometimes.. How I used to go there when I was much younger on saturdays. Mmm. Just because I'm watching the makan places show now. Ahh, two days to the world cup !! Bounces.

Yeah man aggie, pockets and yawn are wayyyy better than SCs who enjoy hanging out. =P
It can be quite gruesome don't you think, gwei ? But I just love their quotes. (: Meredith has nice eyes. Heh. No lah, not crazy about them. At least not as much as aggie, hehe.
Zy you learnt arms race ? Woww. Yes yes, do provide free tuition. Hurhur.

Project Runway later tonight. (:

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

♥ 11:20 PM

Hello, let me introduce you to
The characters in the show
One says yes, one says no
Decide - which voice in your head you can keep alive

Even in madness, I know you still believe
Paint me your canvas so I become
What you could never be

I dare you to tell me to walk through the fire
Brand my soul and call me a liar
I dare you to tell me to walk through the fire
I dare you to tell me
I dare you to

Hello, are you still chasing
The memories in shadows
Some stay young, some grow old
Come alive, there are thoughts unclear
You can never hide

Even in madness, I know you still believe
Paint me your canvas so I become
What you could never be

Shinedown's I Dare You. It sounds like it could've been performed by Chad Kroeger/Nickelback. Just finished my Arms Race essay. Rawrr. I'm not sure if I owe her a China essay. Hmmms, I don't like the arms race. All the treaties and provisions and limitations and blah. Yuck. I quite like China actually. Too much time spent on the Cold War makes one extremely tired of Russia. Hrms.

We had about 4 mind blowing hours of drq/case study workshop. Which continues tomorrow with a timed assignment. (okay, since no one can tell me what it is specifically on, I don't think I want to read through it. and anyway, it's self marked or whatever. SKILLS, not content baby) We had mquek for the first half. She's really nice ! (((: She gave us chocolates (expensive dark chocolate and choco baby at that) and was just sweet. Then for the second half we had vyiak who just haaaaad to call on tmx, cy and I. Hrms. It was the same when she took yt's class. She was with lala and tc and tys was in her class ! Rahh. I was walking behind him when class ended at the block11 corridor when he turned to talk to esmond. Hoho. Gringrin. He can be quite intriguingly good looking don't ask me why. Db says that he reminds her of adidas, haha. And adidas is cute okay ! Hurhur.

So that kept me smiling the whole day. Then we had our evaluation with kwei (oh before that hq braved the rain to buy yt and I lunch, yay him ! :D ) which lasted till 2. Okay I guess. TONS to be worked upon. We're supposedly in the mid silver range. Underlying meaning, more sectionals outside our two practices with ttoh. Oh ho hum. As much as no one wants it, we need it. AYES. Zzz. Remedial pe is a waste of time, I cannot help but stress.

I feel like eating choco baby now. And I didn't meet the rest of p10 today. WEEPS. ))): I miss the bunch of them loads. But my dad was really ticked off and I was tired and I needed to try to get some work done. Ayes ayes. Another day perhaps ! Qua told me that the rest did remark about how they wished I was there.

MAJOR AWWWWWW ))):

I miss them tons.

But there's still time for dinner right ? I hope so. Supposedly they want a choir sentosa outing. Hmms. I have a feeling it won't materialise. Frankie's sister is quite pretty. So unlike him. I want to try to read the compre passages before I sleep. Consolation, perhaps. Everyone is experiencing bouts of depression. How.. typical. Haha. Life is quite in the pits. Maybe. Haha, ooh. It was the 6th of June 2006. So we should all be really thankful as gpt put it in his blog. We're more blessed than we realise. Though it's hard not to gripe and whine ayes. We should count our blessings (instead of sheep) all the same..

Praise God ! :D

♥ 1:14 AM

Don't ask me why I'm blogging when I have school tomorrow. Today. Whatever. Econs drq workshop. Yawn yawn. I hope I don't oversleep. =/ I heard gp was a bore. Nothing new. Was 5 minutes late for choir. Blahh dee daa. Okay I shall just fast forward to

Why Today Rocked ((:

1. I was quite tired and I had piano but but, I got back my theory results. AND I PASSED WOOTS YAY ME ! HAHAHAHA. It was just barely but I don't care. Grade 8 theory, ho ho ho ho. Happy happy ((:

2. Choir practice ended early, yay kwei. Haha. And tomorrow's practice is cancelled, yay yay yay kwei. ((: We had an exchange with tpjc. Mmms, their songs were nice. Especially all those folklore pieces. Darn, I wish we were doing folklore. Oh and I don't have to do pe tomorrow. Hoho.

3. Had lots of fun with the choir people. Firstly, most of us girls (save for me of course, haha) were just going crazy over the middle two guys in the first row. Mr Yawn and Mr Pockets. Nessa and I kept laughing about it and daring each other to ask for their numbers. She kept making it sound as if I was the one who was crazy. So I told her why don't we just take a detour to the foyer on the way to the toilet ? Haha. Lols, like hello. I don't like younger guys. Hahaha. Then we joked with gw and smallkai to the petrol station where we proceeded to torture (and be tortured, argh) by stupid shaun and smallkang.

For the record, they just love hanging out :D

Gosh, doing that is fun. HAHA. And on the way home we had a funny conversation about the haunted room in hotel juon and erm blood and sex and someone who was very strong in that department. AHEM. Lala and shaun are just damn gross. And zx is so funny because he thought the BEP's 'My Humps' was actually 'My Heart'. Like, wadde ? Wahaha. (: Funny..

4. FINALLY managed to finish role of government part 1: market failure. ((: After goodness knows how long. Yay. It's a start !

5. Watched really nice shows on tv. I missed desperate housewives but caught grey's anatomy, scrubs (which was HILARIOUS :D ) and frasier ! Hurhur. I love tee vee. Mmmms.

So yep yep. Today, yesterday was fab. (: Kwei wants to evaluate songs tomorrow though, hrms. Okay anyway, this is overdue. But this picture should speak a thousand words and more.

Hurhur. Anyways, I shall do a fatima and answer tags. (:

I'm quite fine I think ftm ! Don't mind me copying your format, hurhur..
It's time to update your blog cor (: I want photos !
Why must ask that idiot to pay ? Oh yah, gold taps. =/ And you better turn up for the next remedial pe, zy..
Hurhur pokepoke, thanks bev -smiles-
Gerald, if you have the book, lend it to me ! Heh, nicenice junior. Herrick is psychotic, you should talk to him one day.
Gwei ! It sucks being in the first row. I don't know all my actions. Lucky kwei watches dj now, haha.
Dear tongx haha ! You're always late, tsk !!
Yeahh, I have tons of unread books too Mei. But I just want more ! And more time too, lols.
Hahaha, we're just so slack right yUk^ ? Remedial pe is super zzz.

I downloaded a really nice song. Shinedown's I Dare You. Hoho. I shall paste the lyrics here another time. Am re reading About A Boy, yay. (: I love brit humour though I don't get the politics. Rahh, what happened to my Adrian Mole ? Lols. I think I'll be studying out with db next week, yay. (: Oh I just remembered. WORLD CUP THIS FRIDAY ! YAYNESS ! Though I'll only be watching the opening match, lols. Sigh. I'm supporting a whole bunch of teams. Australia, England, Germany, Spain.. Mmms. Haha.

Good day ! Gringrin.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

♥ 11:00 PM

Global Day of Prayer & Tiananmen Square Massacre Anniversary

That's today. Or rather yesterday because it's already past midnight. Let's see what I did this weekend. An incomplete (but going to be taken as complete) VJ paper 2 and 2 paper 1 outlines. Rahhh. GP SUCKS TO THE MAX. Boo.

We were in quartet throughout saturday's practice until our exchange with consort. Which was bad. Ayes. Totally off. Lols, the actions were a huge mess. Karimatanu is too confusing.

Herrick is mad. A mad atheist sadly. And also madly in love. But that's another story altogether. Haha. I have nice nice juniors. And I'm not just saying that because some of them tag my board. Talked to swan who just kept asking if I was checking up on my birds. Lols. Then there's the not so innocent gpt, the very warped zy, xiao kang, xiao kai, sweet producer gwei.. Haha. Mad.

It's quite unhealthy how my life revolves around choir now. Ahh. Sigh. Everyone's in this depressed funk right now. Some holiday this is. And am not just talking about the choir people. Anyway, talking to yt, db and shaun somehow prompted me to think about other depressing issues. Choir related of course. It made me throw up words like superficiality and frivolous. Ayes, I should have known. I mean. I do know. About how I cannot expect every single person to value me as much as I would like to value them. Lols. It was the same last time, it's the same now. Hrms. Interesting. The trend continues. Except it's more obvious now. But lucky for me, there are still a few who can keep me sane.

More or less, hurhur.

Oh and yeah. The big rift. It's horrible but it's an irreversible change. With our dynamics, it's undeniable that things can no longer be like before. Ayes. It's really really really sad. And it saddens and disappoints me to think about it. On a sidenote that is somewhat related, I have a feeling that they all hate me. Yeah. Out of us both, it's obvious that I am the bad egg, the antagonist. Oh wells.

I hope she doesn't come. The last time she did, I was extremely cranky and depressed. Hmms.

Sigh. Am doomed doomed doomed. I don't care if I have to go back to the APTS list. Just give me Ds for everything and a C for gp. Sigh. Mmmms, dear mei has kindly offered to go through geog with me. ((: I really really appreciate it ! I'm really far from the best student around. =/

On a happier note, her brother is recovering. (: We're still hoping for the best. Mmms. Choir tomorrow. Not sure what to expect. I think remedial pe is stupid. Stupid screwy internet connection. I feel like having prata and watching season one of frasier. Rah, no time to read also. I just wish I could go about life my way.

I miss Cedar alot. At least I was more sure about myself then. Even stuff with lemon and zpf was simpler. Much simpler. Lols, bitter laughter. Why can't we just stay young forever ? With little to worry about. Just lego, balloons and playgrounds.

I talk to you as to a friend
I hope that's what you've come to be
It feels as though we've made amends
Like we found a way eventually

It was you who picked the pieces up
When I was a broken soul
And then glued me back together
Returned to me what others stole

I don't wanna hurt you
I don't wanna make you sway
Like I know I've done before
I will not do it anymore
I've always been a dreamer
I've had my head among the clouds
Now that I'm coming down
Won't you be my solid ground

I look at you and see a friend
I hope that's what you wanna be
Are we back now where it all began
Have you finally forgiven me
You gathered my dreams in
When they all blew away
And then tricked them back into me
You saved me I was almost dead

-Sway, The Perishers

You can hear this on the sims2, quite sad and nice really. Am in an emo mood. Lols. Okay tired. Can feel my throat getting scratchy. Haha. Pray I accomplish more tomorrow. I wonder when the theory results will be out. ): Have to pray about that one too ayes.

won't you be my solid ground

Friday, June 02, 2006

♥ 10:36 PM

We had siglap idol for binnamma today. Horrible with a capital HORRIBLE. Argh. Christina is right. We should have pitched towards the guys instead of the girls. But then again, it's easier to get our note from the girls who weren't very loud anyways. Hmms. Ayes. Okay, we need combined sectionals.

We almost did idol style for kucinta. Luckily we didn't. Lols. We sounded quite very terrible. And frankie and dj scolded me for not leading. Lols. Who am I to challenge them ! =/ But it ended on a not so bad note. So yeah. Choir again tomorrow. Sob sob sob. Having an exchange with consort. Whole day will be gone. Am I ever going to start on schoolwork proper ? No. Why ? Because I just. cannot. study. Seriously. At home, I'll be lethargic and distracted. Outside I'll be lethargic and distracted. ARGH. No motivation. Help help help.

Okay am just really fretting about my work. ))): God help me focus. ))): Oh we had a nice long bus ride (yay for seats !) from the cc to j8. Made lots of noise. Frankie and small kang had a good time. I suppose. Lols. Zx, lala, yt and I were just quite cranky. Haha. We had a very noisy dinner at the food court. Yt and I left to walk around a bit but we met the rest at the bus stop. Oh, we saw dear lynette at the ipod shop ! Ayes, I miss my darling bimbo senior. ))):

I only like soccer guys. HAHAHA. Right. Lampard, Torres, Raul, Casillas, Ljungberg.. Hurhur.

I don't know him. Yet. I hope. Seeing as twinks was a failure. Haha.
Lols. Not that it's within my control. Right ? Haha.
Xiaokang is a really nice guy. He should just be softer in future. Lols. But really, it's all shaun's fault, he just CANNOT keep things to himself. Meh.

I want to read murakami's
sputnik sweetheart.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

♥ 10:36 PM

I can't believe I blew 20 bucks today on cab rides. WHAT A HORRIBLE WASTE OF CASH. ))): I can be buying like, new stuff from bugis street. Argh.

Choir was good apart from when he did one by one during warmups. The horror. ): Lucky he didn't have much to say about most of the altos.We did more movement-ish stuff today. Especially for Kucinta, lols. Okay am sorry. Very horrible when it comes to actions and stuff. It sucks being in front. Rahh. But overall it was a pretty good practice and we ended earlier than expected. (:

Thanks to zx we (the very 'smart' people - shaun, jk, lala and I) took 13 and ended up in upper east coast where we had to wait for 14. Lols. And he just had to call his friend to check if the bus was supposed to turn. (which it obviously didn't, doh !) Riight. His fault ! Haha. Took a cab from tanah merah.

There weren't many of us. About 12 from ex 36 and 12 from ex and present 38/35. Yep. Saw jtoh, cng and wtan too. They started eating before we did ! Lols. We had to sit through one and a half hours worth of rituals. =/ That is, deafening music and smoke. Erpx. Oh but mr trevor looked quite sad and tired. ): His wife is pretty though. The prata and ice cream were nice, hehe. It was quite a reunion ! Okay not really. Just that we saw dear chairs, evonne, simin and shiying.

I miss my other half shiying. ))):

I know she won't see this but whatever. Happy 18th birthday darling charis ! Have less depressing nicks please ! Hurhur. Her heels were super high and she's still as pretty. Heh.

I have choir every day for the next 5 days. Practically. We might even have it on sunday, we're not too sure. AYES. Tiring. He wants to do small groups. =/ I NEED TO GET SOME WORK DONE ARRRRRRGGGHHHH.

Oh and because ahhuay and I were curious to know if the soccer people were invited, we asked hzbro to call and ask his classmate. And dear adel just had to suggest that I talk to him. Lols. Which I of course, did not do. Freaked out instead. Hahahaha. And shaun is still being selfish. Grrrr ! Obviously, non mihi solum is not a part of him yet.

Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God ?

I wish he'd be more forgettable. Arghs.

♥ 11:26 AM

For you there'll be no crying
For you the sun will be shining
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you
It's alright, I know it's right

And the songbirds keep singing
Like they know the score
And I love you, I love you, I love you
Like never before

To you, I would give the world
To you, I'd never be cold
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you
It's alright, I know it's right

And the songbirds keep singing
Like they know the score
And I love you, I love you, I love you
Like never before
Like never before; like never before

Songbird by Eva Cassidy
Love Actually soundtrack
B e a utiful. ((:

♥ 10:45 AM

Fly me to the moon
Let me sing among those stars
Let me see what spring is like
On jupiter and mars

In other words, hold my hand
In other words, baby kiss me

Fill my heart with song
Let me sing for ever more
You are all I long for
All I worship and adore

In other words, please be true
In other words, I love you

I just love these jazz numbers. (: I didn't know Frank Sinatra also did Girl from Ipanema. Haha, memories.. The sucky sop2 part and ethel playing the piano. Hurhur.

Unforgettable, that's what you are
Unforgettable though near or far
Like a song of love that clings to me
How the thought of you does things to me
Never before has someone been more
Unforgettable in every way
And forever more, that's how you'll stay
That's why, darling, it's incredible
That someone so unforgettable
Thinks that I am unforgettable too

Ahhh Nat King Cole and Natalie Cole. (: I'm a sucker for oldies like I've said before. Argh, my printer is acting up as usual. Printed paper 2 halfway just like how I printed my geography notes halfway. ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH. Very annoyed. Need to get my file back from school also. Waste time, waste paper, waste ink. Hates this computer. Growls.

Florida's Natural nuggets are fantastic yays. They're so addictive. Heh. The Bangles' Walk Like an Egyptian is such a catchy, rubbishy song. Hurhur. And guess what. It's already past the midweek of the first week of the hols. And I have yet to accomplish anything. Nooooooooooooo. Sigh. Which means I have to stay focused for the next three weeks. And squeeze common test revision as well as holiday homework into it. Meaning a few thousand overdue history essays ! RAWRR. ):

LTG, wake up bel.

Have to leave for choir soon. I hate that there are so many practices and it's taking up so much time. I mean yes, we need it and all but ARGH. Sigh. I brought this upon myself. I have, I need to make it work. I can do this yes yes I can. (cue adam khoo, hahah not that I've ever attended his workshop)