Saturday, April 22, 2006
♥ 11:16 PM
Short bursts. Very tired. Eyes closing. Funfair till 12. Practice till about 3. Reached home at 6ish. Had piano for two hours. Zzzz. Can't take it anymore. But my mother is not back yet. And she's leaving for China tomorrow morning. Way early morning. Zzz. Am quite worried. My grandma's going too.
The highlight of the day, the haunted house. BEAMS. Choir was the anti climax of the day. Too tired to elaborate today. Lots and lots of work. Two tests and sl next week. Thank goodness for wonderful geog and econs teachers. Tests postponed.
Man is born crying. When he has cried enough, he dies.
It's interesting how he can be so adorable for a split second then return to being an idiot. Argh, wasted opportunities ! Ah wells. Zzz.
'I'm capable of being just as sorry as you are. ... So we're both sorry, all right?! ... All right'
My favourite line in Dr Strangelove Or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb. Hoho. Though I didn't understand most of it. Stanley Kubrick is interesting. Maybe I should read Metamorphosis. It's by... Kafka ? Not sure. Blahhs.
People need to start paying me for tickets. Sigh. Another long tiring week ahead. Teach less learn more. Funny how I now have 6 day work weeks. ): Worried. But ahh. Sigh.
♥ 12:18 AM
OI totally hate the school. Why. Because despite the revision to the standards for pft (not to my benefit), they still insist on silver for afternoon pe.
WTF.
Had it been the old standards, I would've cleared. I could only do 3 pullups. I can now do five. SEE IMPROVEMENT. But do they consider that ? Nooooo. What does it mean ?
That I am bloody 2 pullups short of an effing silver.
So sue me. Am very angry and disappointed. It's probably because I didn't train (wait wait, who does ? =X) and we did not have pe last week. RAWRRRRRRRR. Whatever I totally hate the department. Am so touched by the encouragement from the girls though. ((: They are going to train with me. And we can help ahpong and regina as well.
love to ahdella, pongella, charbana and ahhuaya. hurhur. (:
Didn't go watch netball today. 'Do you want to eat prata ?' Oops. I think I annoyed adel. Lols. Yay for our posters and banner and bilboard ! (: Haha. Though definitely not as hyped as last year. Hope it'll be fun tomorrow. If I'm not wrong, two interesting classes have their booths in the canteen too. HAHA.
I quote the namesake of our stall himself
'Buy one for one dollar or buy three for five dollars and get two free' =/
Riiiiight, lols.
QINGQING'S CHINCHOW
Exactly the same as last year. Except now without ah huay's tau huay. Hurhur. (: I hope it'll be fun tomorrow. They want me to try the haunted house. BRRR ): The ultimate chicken doesn't want to. Ah wells. The advertisement was darn good though. Gave me chills.
2 hours of piano tomorrow. Zzz. Oh and even worse, there is choir after family day. I CAN'T GO OUT FOR PRATA. Boo. ))): Sigh. Thanks a lot kwei. Don't want to comment on the alto situation. Too much to say. Sports day is coming. I hope it won't be a flop. Ayes. Really. And I hope it doesn't rain too. Which reminds me.. We really need a wet weather alternative. I want to visit the pasar malam. Tralala. I like my new template, hoho. Though I wanted something brighter but the other one was difficult to fiddle with.
And yes, I'm shy that way. =/ Chiang quick. Talk to her.
Sunday, April 16, 2006
♥ 11:44 PM
It sucks when you cough so much you can't breathe sometimes. The throat is better but my lungs are sore from coughing. Hah. Wheeze wheeze. Can't really sing. Hmmms. I hope kwei only comes back on thursday so I can help with the heats tomorrow.
Finally finished my gp essay. Looks like crap though. Sigh. Going to do my history tutorial tomorrow. Still left with 3 gp blogs. What did I tell you about never ending gp ? I hate motorola. No space at all and I can't upload photos. Rawrr.
Chiang is an idiot. Oh why do you and twinks have to be such disappointments ? TSK. Go suck eggs.
And how is it that everyone has someone to love ? I was taking the train home on friday and I was leaning on the section between two carriages. The other three corners were occupied by couples. Grumbles. Okay, I'm destined to be a cynical old nun. And I'll be the one at SDU not you corinna ! Hurhur.
Interesting fact. Women are less likely to successfully commit suicide, but more likely to attempt it.
My finger is cramped. I hate school. Randomness. Thrash HC. I lost my binnamma and karimata score. CRIES. ): I miss my girlfriends. The mere mention/thought of you makes the memories all flood back. They play over and over again in my mind. No they don't make me sad. They make me angry. And disappointed. But partly with myself for letting myself be affected. I seldom make sense. Time for a new template. Tralalala. I need an ego boost. And new stationery. WAKE UP BEL. ):
Oh, and
HAPPY EASTER ((((:
Sunday, April 09, 2006
♥ 11:00 PM
1. List ten things you want to say to 10 people but know you never will.
2. Don't say who they are.
3. Tag 5 people
Okay actually, I can't really think of 10 proper things I've always wanted to say. Am in the midst of doing my econs case study. Ayes. I might make a proper list another time.
1. I don't know why you did what you did. I don't know why you never did anything to change things. Do I not mean anything to you ? I thought I did. But I guess I was wrong. And I guess I'm really too tired to care anymore. I guess you never knew how much I trusted you. You'll never know. I'm just tired of the pretense. Argh. Sucks.
(see that was only my first one. and I'm tired already. hmmms. ): )
2. Why is it that when I almost joined you guys for lunch, you were scared ? Don't even start to think that I don't know how you talk behind my back. Our backs. I've seen and heard enough. And you have no basis whatsoever. You think you're better than us. Sexist asshole.
3. Yeah. I was bloody hurt. But no. You don't care. Cos I was never a friend to you. I didn't do anything to you and yet you had to say all those things about me. Wrong, make up all those things about me. To think that I actually enjoyed having conversations with you. You're irresponsible, selfish and you think you know me. You don't. So shut the hell up already.
4. I was blind. And again, I did nothing to you. I bore neither spite nor malice against you and yet you hated me. Oh but you kept that smile on your face, the twinkle in your eye. Why did I not see earlier the knife you held behind your back as you joked and laughed ? You think that you are above us all. It hurt how I was never a friend to you like you were to me. But that's okay. Whatever. I've learnt from the experience. I've learnt that you're more dangerous than you look.
5. I will never be the perfection that you wish for. Time and again, I fall short of your expectations. Rare is the word of encouragement from you. Each time, you turn a blind eye when I meet my own targets, my own goals. Just as long as I don't get those stellar grades, I am worthless. Sometimes you just don't see that I try. What matters to me just doesn't matter to you. Why is it that it takes so much for you to be supportive of what I enjoy ? You think you know me better than I know myself. Hah. Think again. We live in a different, easier yet more difficult world. Why don't you ever just try to understand ?
Ayes. Too tired. I think I shall continue another time. Thinking about this just makes me sad, mad and disappointed in various people.
♥ 5:27 PM
Wonderwall
-Oasis
Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now
And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
I don't know how
Because maybe
You're gonna be the one saves saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now
And all the roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall
I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall
Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
What's a wonderwall anyway ? Mmms. I always wonder. Tell me why. Meow. Oh I'm in love with this. Isn't it so pretty ? Gold is so retro and so in. Beams. I just have a penchant for soccer boots. Don't ask why. Ahpa has to teach me how to play properly, I don't care. Lols. Oh and regarding the previous entry, I forgot to mention sooks and sf ! HEHE. Am so happy for her :D
Saturday, April 08, 2006
♥ 11:51 PM
I don't think I'm succumbing to the pressure. But I can't say that I'm not feeling it. WHAT TO THE EVER MAN.
Heats today weren't that bad. It started out really confusing with this huge crowd at the grandstand but all the excitement and chaos gave me quite an adrenaline rush. ( : Okay fine, I'm weird that way. So yeah. Started out having to record the results for the finals but had to station myself at the prize table. Mmms. Had fun with adel fighting over who should announce and other lame stuff. Yeah, it was tiring and I'm a little sun burnt. Mr S and Ms D Tan rock (( : Hurhur. After that we played some penalty kick, hzbro, ahpa and I. Okay, I was such a failure because I simply have no strength to kick the ball anywhere at all. So it just rolled around when I kicked it. =/ Then when we used the actual goalpost it was to hz's advantage and ahpa's disadvantage cos hz managed to score more. Whilst ahpa missed and hit the pole etc. Haha. Then when we moved to the smaller one (in the hockey D) upon my request, it was to hz's disadvantage cos he had less space to score. Lols. Ayes, I must work on my nonexistent soccer skills. Haha ! But it was fun just fooling around in the sun. Then adel joined us and we were the keepers and I managed to deflect the ball twice I think ! Hahaha ! I'm better with the hands. ( : Also, I played squash ! WOOTS ! First with hzbro (damn funny lah he) then also with adel, ahpa and caryn. Hurhur, it's really fun although tiring. I almost lost my teeth to the racket when adel played. We kept almost colliding with each other. Hahaha. Yep, have to try again another day. Then I had lunch with ahpa and caryn at amk central and we saw nice stuff at sportslink. SHOES. POSER SHOES, I WANNNNNT ! Rawrr, I saw lovely xodus shoes too (as I have already mentioned).
Met zx, lala and yt at amk macs. Tried in vain to do work. Hq joined us later and tc and markmark popped by. Yep. WASN'T PRODUCTIVE AT ALL. RAWWRRRR. ))): I brought yl's gp home after I went to photocopy it. ARRRRGHH. :((( Sigh. We went to eat at chomp chomp for dinner. Lala, yl, zx, hq and I. It was fun. THE FOOD WAS DAMN GOOD. Yayyy. Met markmark (who left for mass) and dj. Then walked to near hq's house. Sang along the way. The harmonies and all.. Really nice. ( :
Learnt lots of interesting stuff today. Lols. But I feel damn bad because of a prank I played on poor lala. A HUGE SORRY ! ): Frankie is an idiot. Ok I shall paste the entry I wanted to publish yesterday.
Navleen has the nicest quotes. Hurhur. (: Anyways, I have good news ! Ahem,
I FREAKING PASSED MY 2.4 WITH A 15:48 !!!!! BEAMS !
Okay. I shaved almost two minutes off my time ! Whee ! HAHAHAHA. (((( : Happy Days ! All I need to do now is get a silver for my other stations and no more afternoon pe for me ! Hoho.
The sl project is getting increasingly screwed up. Sigh. )): No one likes having to shoulder blame.
CARPE DIEM
"A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying."
-- Grey's Anatomy
"At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that it's happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away."
Ayes. Long post. Never ending gp. Piano tomorrow. Sadness. I hate this pressure. RAWRRRR. Adel and hzbro. Caryn and ahpa. __ and ____. Even ___ liking ______. And _____ liking ____. Okay I know it is confusing. And for the latter two, it isn't even a two way thing. But the point is, RAWRRRR. I hate gp.
Thursday, April 06, 2006
♥ 11:13 PM
All he says is thx and thx a lot. LOLS. But he's still really hot. Rawrr. ): Must he be so cold ? Ah ayes.
SADNESS. Don't we all know why ? It was really close though. But I must say that I honestly enjoyed myself a lot. Although I had a few heart attacks and a heartbreak moment. Mmms.
Gp gp gp and neverending gp. Boo. ): That's what lectures and breaks are for. =/ I hope I have time this weekend to catch up. Oh, I found my econs file ! HIP HIP HURRARMADILLO ! Everyone smile ( : It was in the choir room all along ! Near the bass section. Hmms.
It was REALLY UNEXPECTED. Why does no one believe me anymore ? I am not trying to be hypocritically modest ! Rawrr. I know I didn't deserve the score I got for the inflation case study test. But well anyways, both tests are morale boosters. Go bel ! Keep it up ! (not the late work though =X)
I miss tang wei chin lemon ! ): It's really sad because he just thinks that I'm this horrible cynic who's just sarcastic all the time. Really I'm not !
tang.of tears n rain says:
u have this cynical air about u
tang.of tears n rain says:
i dunno whether to take what u say as what u say or if its notsosubtle sarcasm
Ooh another thing, I MET SLIN TODAY ! DOUBLE HIP HIP HURRARMADILLO ! ((((: Yay ! Talked to her for a bit. I hope her leg heals soon. (: Must meet up with the stalkers ! Hurhur.
Qy is my hero. Seriously. It is rare witnessing such raw emotions from him. When we tried to talk to him, we could sense his disappointment. Really heartbreak man. ):
But I found this line quite meaningful. So I texted it as encouragement to him. The other girls texted him to cheer him up also.
Heroes rise, heroes fall
Rise again, win it all
In your heart, can't you feel the glory
I didn't want to tell him what song I quoted it from though. Lols. It's the one kane and michelle sang. Hahaha.
Anyways, please PRAY for me ! ( : My 2.4 run is tomorrow. SILVER ! Nothing less ! I hope tomorrow will be a good day mmms..
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
♥ 11:23 PM
If you change your mind, I'm the first in line
Honey I'm still free
Take a chance on me
If you need me, let me know, gonna be around
If you've got no place to go, if you're feeling down
If you're all alone when the pretty birds have flown
Honey I'm still free
Take a chance on me
Gonna do my very best and it ain't no lie
If you put me to the test, if you let me try
Take a chance on me
ABBA ! I love ABBA songs (: I remember our musical in sec2. Ahhhs.. It was so tiring but so fun. Oh wells. I MISS CEDAR LOADS. ))): P10 ! WHERE ARE YOU ! Ayes. School sucks. It has robbed me of a life. I miss eating at the canteen (coco crunch, lime juice and misc snacks) or at pp macs after choir. Ayes. ):
So much work. Sucks. Jc life really blows. Rawrr.
The balance is as such 50% choir. 37% sl project. 13% TRYING to complete schoolwork. Oh right, I might as well just say that 13% of my time is devoted to using the computer/procrastinating. Sigh.
All the time. We deny that we are in denial.
I want to watch them play soccer. Us against MJ. A really important match. But we have choir. But kwei is not coming. HOWWWWW. Rawrr. What is this man. ): I hate such situations. And the answer is not clear cut. Gah.
Sunday, April 02, 2006
♥ 11:00 AM
The Fallen by Franz Ferdinand is great ( : But the lyrics sound blasphemous. =/ Am not quite sure. Mmms. I realised lots of choir people are joining the school idol search. Malcolm has a band. Apparently Eugene has a band too. (KWS ! SOME FUNNY !) Qiaowen and Shaun. Lala. Xinyi. Jeanne and Serene. Some of the guy juniors. Kane and Michelle. Oh, they're doing this really nice song. Just downloaded it. I want to spend my lifetime loving you. The Zorro theme. Mmms.
We had siglap prac yesterday. It was surprisingly good. I think he's quite pleased with us. I'm quite pleased with us. BUT. The altos have a looonnnnng way to go. Ah mmms. Then we had an exchange with vjchoir. I SAW DAWN AD JIEJUN AND SINDHU ! Hoho. And they are really really good. (but yah duh, they have to be. their italy competition is in the coming week) Their sops are powerful and you can hear the balance between the sections. They also have this super sop who is dj's ex gf. Ah mmms. But the school is fab compared to ours. Very student oriented. I LIKE THE TREEHOUSE. And there's this 60% off petrol sign. Lols, looks like shell station. Oh but the best thing was, I saw JLOW ! WOOOOTS ! ( : She looks different now, straight hair and all. Hehe, we have have have to catch up ! All her numbers.. Teehee. Pity darling xunny honey bunny wasn't there though.. Ruz too. Ahh..
Wanted to watch a movie but ended up walking around. Oh, and spending a few gazillion years in this fashion checking out potential second half costumes. There is actually nice stuff in the place, seriously. BUT THE TECHNO MUSIC SUCKS. It gave me this horrible headache. Argh. But yeah, we got some ideas mmms.. Bought a nice sleeveless top from LP Zone ! Yt too so we paid only 8 bucks each. Yay. And I bought more rubbishy stuff. =/ Oh, a keychain thingy for wl too. Lols. I SO NEED SHOES FROM XODUS ! They are/were having a sale. ): I saw a nice pair, 19 bucks. Boo boo boo. Oh and I saw a bunch of the soccer people. Zx saw them first but I was lagging so I only saw them 5 seconds later and waved to jianwei. Lols. Anyways, I NEED SHOES ! Hoho.
We had dinner at the food court. Saw really nice books at San Booksop. Rah, no time and money. The indo grilled food was REALLY NICE (: Yay for sister dj who helped me queue and buy. (x Yup, funny lah. Yl was damn high and she kept making random comments. Highly amusing. There were ten of us. The birthday boy eugene (tc), hq, yl, yt, jasper, markmark, zx, dj and malcolm (who made us wait damn long, grr). Mmms, they want a chalet in june and a cruise trip after the As. Lols, we haven't had our common tests yet. Study groups I say !
Yeah, and thanks to I don't know which idiot, I'm suddenly paired off with a whole bunch of people. Shaun (his classmates), tc (thanks yl..) and joe (like huh ? lols. idiot jk..). Yah ! ARGH. It's making things weird. GRRR. And stupid shaun just had to go tell teoyh rubbish. Bah. Frankie is an idiot. I blocked him for awhile.
I have no idea what homework we have and no one wants to reply me. Sadness. AND I HAVE NEVERENDING GP. YUCK. Cries. I still can't find my econs stuff. VERY DEPRESSED.
I and E day was fun. Everyday should be I and E day. The pyramid game was fun. Though we didn't win anything. Oh rah. I want to go to ikea. I think the seminar was screwed up. Stupid lah, the venue was pathetic.
Sigh. I don't want to go back to school. I need happy pills. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Heats are starting. Won't be seeing kwei for about two weeks. Gah. Sigh. Rawrr. Sigh.