hello...

before surgery, a little bit to share.

sometimes the things you thought you'd long forgotten surface.

which is fine until they appear in your dreams.

this particular leaves, i believe, a similar experience. not necessary of loss, but a possible sense of disorientation.



do you know whats it about?


a hint, a vestige, a little left over ember glow of that love.


a love reserved for a certain soul.


i loved you once.

let that be enough.

but i cant help but be reminded, as i have, this morning, how....lovely..



do you remember how it was like?

we were both soaked to the toe.

i stood alone, grinning as i waited for you to make your way; towards me;

in a dejected but still cheerful demeanour.

the way your hair, the way the wet clothing clung to your svelte figure

the way you tied it up..still puts a smile upon my face.


lets go! i said , as you finally reached up to me.

you whispered your plan in a sideway glance.


another sideway glance, that faint, wry smile.

the way the droplets roll down your cheeks, that little babyfats still existent.

how the shinning wetness glistened upron your brows, how you bit your lower lip...


as i stood there, allowing you to catch up, perhaps in pity, perhaps in empathy

not yet in realisation.

as you turned to face me with that silly, sunshine grin even under near twilight skies

another side glance

you held my right hand.

& changed everything.


fingers interlocked, eyes on each other. how then, i knew right away, you already stole my heart right under my nose. in your shy , lovely way that only you, and you alone, know.




how i acted nonchalant,as we ran....inside, the thundering beats just grew louder...


& so i awake this morning, with a smile on my face.




i loved you once. let that be enough.




it might not have gotten to anywhere else had we allowed it to.



a pleasant memory.no more, no less.




in the morning hours of now





my heart beats with a dull, keen ache still.






i loved you once. as did you.


you gave me awesome memories. i hope i gave you some too.




let them rest for good. let them come up, sleeping , into my dreams once in a while. i wont mind.


not if its yours that you made for me. i dont think you would mind either .dont be disturbed by it (=






but let that, be enough.