What happens when a land-lover goes boating

I admit that I am an unapologetic land lover.  My husband on the other hand lives and dies for boating.  So I go, unless I can find someone else who will take my place. 

So after the first few years or our marriage, I encouraged him to live his boating dream and buy a pleasure boat.  Heck I even went to the coast guard class with him that had me longing for my boring college history professor’s lectures.  Seriously, my requisite handbook is full of doodles of dozing women and eager men.  Still, I passed with flying colors because if nothing else I’m a good at cramming information in a locker in my head that I will never again open or need.

So when we go out on the marina that is near our home husband dear wades into greenish water that could contain all sorts of pathogens to launch the boat.  I wait on the shore until it is ready and I can jump off the dock and into the boat unscathed.  The smell of the brackish water is not exactly gag inducing but not particularly pleasant either.  Of course there are always a few bloated fish floating along the perimeter of the boat. 

I can swim but I won't be in the olympics any time soon.  And my husband swears that this boat is unsinkable.  Hmmm-- isn't that what they said about the Titanic?

For some reason it’s always windy out on the water, and I’m not a fan of hats.  Even if I was they would most likely end up in the water.  My hair is rather long and fine and the knots are impossible to get out without half a head of hair coming out with it. So I get a hat that has a string that tightens around the neck.  It kind of resembles a little kid’s cowboy hat. I tuck all my hair in the hat and tighten the string.  Don’t think I will make my debut in a fashion magazine, but it beats going bald from yanking out knots.

And then we head off, slow at first, until we pass the go ahead buoy where you are allowed to hit the gas.  I vaguely remember from my coast guard class that when you encounter a wave you have to angle the boat to cross it. My husband, however, likes to take the bull by the horns and hit-em full force.  Now being a woman, I have women parts.  And when one hits a wave head on like this it forces those two parts to bounce uncontrollably and painfully!  If you are not holding on to them it can black both your eyes!  And did you get the part that it hurts like the dickens?  So he throttles back at my insistence.

We move on at a slower pace and then decide to anchor awhile while we fish.  Our boat seats at least 6, but it doesn’t have a head.  What you may ask is a head?  It’s what seafarers call a bathroom.  And so we have another dilemma that men don’t have. We have no choice but to head back to the marina so I can use a porta potty.  I don’t use porta potties unless it is a strict emergency.  It's an emergency.  So after the pit stop we return to the water. This time I restrict my liquid intake and my thirst is kicking in since it is pretty hot, but we are pretty far from the shore now so I'm not taking any chances.  There is an irony about floating on water (even slimy green water) when you are just about dying of thirst.

The sun beats down on us even with the top up as it reflects off the water.  Did I mention that I sunburn at even the slightest exposure? 

We anchor and fish a little.  We catch a few, mostly we throw them back because the only thing less fun than being stuck on a boat is cleaning fish. After a hour or so we head for home. Land ho! As we dock my husband is smiling from ear to ear, happy and sun kissed.  Me-- I’m surveying my reddened face and legs thinking that I will be applying Aloe Vera for the next few days as I sprint to the porta potty.

And so another day on the water comes to an end.  I can only hope that someone will take my place the next time.  I can only hope. 

For a land-loving boating diversion why not hop on over to my crafting blog and follow the tutorial to make a wiggle sailboat magnet from a recycled soda can. (which I didn't drink on the boat) 

Wiggle sailboat tutorial

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Upcycled zipper charm bracelet tutorial

Use an old zipper to make a new charm bracelet.  This is a great teen or tween crafting idea.  This is such a simple project that is terrific to make during those snow days when there is nothing to do.  I’ve used word charms but you can use any sort of charms you like. For a super upcycle, you can remove a zipper from an old piece of clothing or just purchase a new zipper.

Supplies:

7-inch metal zipper

Oval jump rings

Large crimp bead for clasp

Lobster claw clasp

Medium jump rings

Charms of choice

Lighter or stop fray fabric glue

Scissors

Needle nosed pliers

Instructions:

1.     Cut the fabric close to the zipper with scissors.  Use the lighter to run over the edges to keep it from fraying, or you can use stop fray fabric glue and let it dry.

2.     Using the needle nosed pliers attach the crimp bead fro the clasp to the non-opening end of the zipper.  Squeeze it tightly.

3.     Open a large round jump ring twisting to open rather than pulling apart.  Add to the crimp bead and then add the lobster claw clasp.  Close the jump ring, twist to close.

4.     Add a second jump ring to the zipper pull.

5.     Using oval jump rings twist to open and add the desired charm.  Attach to the zipper and twist back to close.  Continue adding charms down the length of the zipper. 

Horse show hair bows for lead line and short stirrup

You can make Horse show hair bows for your favorite little girls quickly and easily using Bowdabra bow maker.  Styles change on the Horse show circuit just as they do with all fashion.  The current trend at the moment is for lead line and short stirrup competitors to wear their hair in braids accented with beautiful bows.  

These Horse show hair bows can cost over $30 but you can make them for pennies with the Bowdabra.  

Visit Bowdabra for the full tutorial today.  

Happy trails from Bowdabra and Make it easy crafts

Gift cards, yea or nay?

What did you buy this Christmas for that tween who acts and dresses like she is 25; or how about the teen that only speaks in monosyllables?  I mean seriously how do you figure out what to buy for someone whose sole communication is limited to yes and no…mostly no? How about Sister June’s tots from Florida that you aren’t even sure if they are 6 or 9?  We won’t even discuss Auntie Bertha from Phoenix who you haven’t seen since you were 6 or 9? 

I bet you opted to buy a gift card. Consumer reports states that gift cards are the worst gift you could give.  Why?  Store cards don’t have fees like bankcards but they are sometimes inconvenient since you can only use them at that particular store. A huge percentage of cards remain unused moldering away in drawers and wallets and some simply forgotten. 

Then we come to deciding which store to get that gift card from. Someone I know loved Bath and Body works and they received a gift card to Bed bath and beyond.  Ok, both have the word, bath in their names, and they are both nice stores. It is just a minor mistake but Bed bath and beyond happened to be 40 miles further than the other store so, yes, it went unused.

While Cards from malls and those issued by banks like Mastercard, Visa, and American express seem like a good idea they come with purchase fees up front.  In addition after a year of inactivity they subtract an amount every month so that a $25 card can become worthless in 10 months time!  Lose that card and you will pay a hefty fee to get another or more commonly you are simply out of luck.

The Mall cards I’ve seen literally come with a huge booklet in tiny print of stipulations, rules and limitations.  Personally I don’t even read the manuals that come with electronic equipment so I sure as heck am not going to spend my time reading that!

In conclusion if you want to give a gift to someone and you just don’t know what to get them, give them a check or cash.  There are very creative ways to turn cash into a gift that keeps on giving.  And if you get a gift card be sure to spend it--quickly!

So…your opinions are welcomed –gift cards, yea or nay?

There are lots of ideas to make money a gift in itself...search Pinterest for tons of ideas. This star tutorial is an easy one that you can make in any denomination...

Five dollar star

Dress up your Halloween table with a sparkle spider.  He will guard your goodies in style! Quick and easy sequined spider is a fun project to do while watching TV.  This is a great group project too!

You will need:

2 ½” Styrofoam balls, each ball makes two spiders

Serrated steak knife

½” sequin pins

Gold and silver sequins

Two large red sequins

Tacky craft glue (other glues may dissolve the foam)

Chenille stems, in white/black striped and sparkle white

Black felt

Scissors

White colored pencil

Ruler

1.     Cut the Styrofoam ball in half using the serrated knife.  Rub the two cut sides together to smooth out.

2.     Place the cut circle on a piece of black felt and trace around with a white colored pencil.  Cut out.  Cut four 4-inch pieces of chenille stems from each color.  Add a dab of glue on the ends of the cut stems. Insert into the bottom sides of the Styrofoam ball half alternating each color.

3.     Add a generous amount of glue on the bottom of the ball half and attach the black felt.  Trim any excess if necessary.

4.     Begin adding the sequins.  Add some tacky glue to each area as you work smoothing with your finger. Insert the sequin pin through the hole in the sequin and push into the Styrofoam.  Continue until you have covered almost the entire piece.  Add two larger red sequins on the lower front for the eyes.  (See photo)

5.     Bend the chenille stems to form the legs and display your spider on your holiday tables.

Check out my tutorial for the Sculpey sitting duck figurine.  My husband who is definitely a man's man and doesn't really say much about decor or crafts, walked in and looked at the clay mallard sitting on the shelf and just smiled.  He told me,  "that's your best design yet".  And coming from him, that was a real compliment!

Happy Spring everyone!  It's almost 70 degrees and finally sunny!

Sitting duck tutorial on Make it easy crafts

Only two more weeks till the day you can show how much you care!  I'm featuring these free printable Valentine cards on Make it easy crafts.  Instructions for making presentation envelopes too!

Click for tutorial

Enter to win a pair of Breast Cancer awareness drop earrings

To recognize the Breast Cancer Awareness Month of October I am giving away a pair of Sterling silver ear wire drop earrings.  Low entries so be sure to enter today!  And if you are a DIY'er there are free instructions to make a pair yourself too as an added benefit!

Breast Cancer Awareness earrings