DAY 3 _ HE, IS, BESIDE US[me]. HYMN 93 #GiveThanks MUSIC

Today was Sunday #2 of no singing or even humming--but my heart was more at peace with the notion. The opening hymn was Prayer of Thanksgiving. We pulled out our hymn books that we take in our diaper bag as a habit of wanting to be able to read the words with our our young children and not have them think we are on our "phones". 

My eyes became wet as I read through the start of verse two: 

Beside us to guide us, our God with us joining, 

Ordaining, maintaining his kingdom divine;

So from the beginning the fight we were winning;

Thou, Lord, wast at our side;

All glory be thine!

Beside US [me, my family and the little COVID respecting, distancing, mask wearing congregation, the world] to guide us, our God with us joining. In those words, I almost could not see or sing them in my heart as my eyes were blurred...but it was as if the Lord himself was reminding/saying to my heart, He was beside us/me, joining with me in the silence of listening when we can't sing. Being beside me through the craziness of the days.  It was a beautiful impression. 

Church was wonderful! I am so thankful I was able to partake of the sacrament. When the sacrament cloth covering is gently laid over the bread and water--sometimes a wrinkle comes up in how the fabric settles.  I am always filled with gratitude when a deacon or priest will take notice and take the time to smooth it out. It is a reminder to me the tenderness we should keep of love and adoration for the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ and His atoning body/blood. 

The speakers were sublime, inspired, and obviously worked to have the spirit as they prepared and shared. Their messages were of hope and gratitude focused in and on the Savior. I wish all my family could have been there to hear their words as I have done a somewhat poor job trying to retell their talks! 

In between the talks, was a father daughter duet on the piano of My Heavenly Father Loves Me. which my little two year old started to sing in our pew. 😍 

This is a recording of Alan Walker (my friend's visiting dad) playing at a different ward meeting... but this is the song he and Mallory played today. It is beautiful! And what they were playing about [lyrics below] is equally beautiful. Thank you for sharing your gifts of music!

1. Whenever I hear the song of a bird

Or look at the blue, blue sky,

Whenever I feel the rain on my face

Or the wind as it rushes by,

Whenever I touch a velvet rose

Or walk by our lilac tree,

I’m glad that I live in this beautiful world

Heav’nly Father created for me.

2. He gave me my eyes that I might see

The color of butterfly wings.

He gave me my ears that I might hear

The magical sound of things.

He gave me my life, my mind, my heart:

I thank him rev’rently

For all his creations, of which I’m a part.

Yes, I know Heav’nly Father loves me.

The whole meeting was a spiritual feast. Thank you Heavenly Father, for letting me get to partake in such beauty church meeting.

  Happiness is: this statement from my four year old. Never-mind that it was at 5:30  this morning.  They put their chairs in a circle and each had a copy of  The Book of Mormon... Oh, the tenderness--seeing them "study" my favorite book! 

TWO TIES AND A BOW-TIE

For whatever reason, Mr. Doogies takes getting dressed for Sunday very seriously. He carefully button's up his shirt which is usually re-buttoned with love by his mom or aunt!  I have to admit, he dresses for Church with a reverence and in a way I have never witnessed a child do. I really think it is because his heart knows whom he is dressing for!

Yesterday as sacrament was being passed I whispered to Doogies asking him what his favorite story of Jesus was. He didn't give me any indication he had an answer. Wanting to encourage his sacrament thoughts, I mentioned, "Like when Jesus feeds all the people with the bread and fishes..." Without skipping a beat, he whispered, "I like when He prayed so hard-he bleeded." A little shocked by his answer I asked, "You like when Jesus was in Gethsemane?" Doogs replied, "Yes--when He prayed so hard--He bleeded."

What a beautiful four year old profound interpretation/observation.

Thanks for my sacrament focus Mr. Doogies.  I love you.


EYE SINGLE TO HIS GLORY
Yesterday in Relief Society our teacher posed an awesome question. She discussed the scripture about keeping one's eye single to the glory of God. She asked each of us to turn to our neighbor and discuss what that phrase meant for us personally in our life. One woman answered that for her it meant that with retiring soon she should be going on a mission... but she is too scared to go. But keeping her eye single, is accepting the next step she feels she is to make, which for her, is a mission. Another sister's eyes started to glisten as she said what having an eye single to His glory meant for her. She didn't elaborate because of time, but I gathered from the emotion that her eye single meant having patience in God's timing with having a family...

I always viewed that scripture as a blanket statement of putting God's will first/keeping Him in my main focus. BUT this inspired teacher pointed out that each of us in our own individual lives can reflect and thus discover what having an eye single means for us in whatever challenges we are facing.

Inspired question! Inspired teacher!

Happiness is the insight of a child.

I am grateful for Dad's tartar sauce, Mom's custard, and a couple that enjoys dancing together!

GOD WON'T YOU CHANGE HIM?

I recently came back from a wonderful trip from Florida. Mom and Dad spoiled Thayne and I with some park hoping adventures. It was wonderful! Saw a few miracles, LOVED the beauty, and wished that others sweating standing in line believed in the the power of deodorant! :D

Thank you mom and dad for a much needed vacation!

RACE CAR DRIVER
Thaynermack and I took a red eye out to Florida, hoping to get one extra day there in which we could go to the temple.

Nearing almost 1am, an announcement came on that the plane was over booked and they were looking for volunteers to leave in the morning instead. Which the airlines would provide a 400 dollar voucher, food, and a hotel room along with the morning flight out. Thayne and I didn't "need" to be in Florida, so we hopped up and walked over to the counter. I got excited about having a ticket "paid" for so I could go out and visit Kiss and Nyk sometime.

Just as we were about to be the ones putting our names on the list, I had the slightest of all impressions, that we should not do it. I told Thayne that I didn't think we should go and he asked if I didn't feel good about it. I told him the "small" (and when I say small, it was almost unnoticeable) impression, he being the amazing kid he is, said no problem, let's go sit down. So we left the grand opportunity and I wrote it off that God probably was saving me from anxiety of making sure everything went smooth the next day.

We boarded the plane and prepared our blankets and neck pillows for the long into the morning hour flight.

The guy sitting next to the window came and sat down and he seemed to be a nice guy. As the flight departures were being rapped up he and I had some small talk. He was in Utah on business. Turns out he is a stunt race car driver. Only about 200 in the USA with his profession. His line of work involves commercials and movies. He just signed on with the new Charlie's Angels TV serious. He (ha, he does have a name- Mark) Mark showed me one of the scripts for the Charlie's Angels-- talked about how car A is going 200 miles per hour, hits car B which rolls several times, and car A is to spin out of control ... etc. I looked at Mark and asked him if he really was going to do that. Without a wince, and matter of fact-- he said "Ya". He said he knew what to do to make the car roll and flip in any direction. He said high speed chases for film were a piece of cake! NO problem and he felt completely confident that whatever the direction the director wanted to have happened, he COULD make happen. (Yes, if you are picturing a girl in the middle seat with her jaw slightly dropped, next to the calm collective race car driver--you have pictured the airplane scene correctly!)

His gig in UT was near Tooele at a race car track there. For 8 hours a day his contract was such that people would pay 150 dollars per ride... that is, sit and go in a race car for 3 mins! He said he was doing that all week. Where do people get money like that to spend on 3 mins of time?!

Well needless to say I was sitting by "Mr Hotstuff". But the whole time while speaking, the guy, who is clearly "well off" was very chill, calm, and had a great peace about it. I felt impressed to ask about his family. He married around his 40's and has three little girls. And at the talk of them, this already kind and soft hearted man, became even more soft. His love for his little girls was evident.

The next three hours we talked about the gospel. Apparently 20 years ago Mark had gone to visit a ward and all he could remember was that the women and the men separated. We talked about prophets and General conference coming up the next weekend. After sharing a principle on the temple Mark said, "So if I understand, your church has a great emphasis in your dead. I don't think my church does that." At times I wondered if he may be "sleeping" through the conversation, but sure enough the spirit urged me to share on and after each principle he would recap what he was understanding... "So you believe in living apostles and my church just teaches about dead ones"... We were the only ones on the whole plane with our over head lights on. Thanyer was snoring next to me, and he was joined with a sounds of other heavy sleepers. After several hours we decided we had better get a little shut eye. We turned off our lights. I stared into the dark plane and the tears just started to roll in gratitude for such an opportunity. Sharing the gospel to someone with someone who was pure in heart was worth any pass up on any voucher! I kicked myself for not having a copy of the Book of Mormon on me. The first time in 6 1/2 years of flying for business trips and such--and no Book of Mormon! In all honestly, I didn't even think to bring one. I shared that with Patti to which her response of shock was that was always my first thing to pack. But I didn't. A few tears dropped in morning my lack of preparation.

Landing in Georgia woke up all snores. As I pulled out my tickets for our connecting flights, I noticed my conference ensign. just one more week of the challenge left! For a split second, I didn't want to give it away, for surely the edition had become like my personal scriptures. Completely marked up with impressions and insights... but God had prepared a way even with the lack of preparation on my end. I showed Mark the Ensign and his eyes lit up as I shared showed him the prophet. I told him to keep it which I half expected him to turn me down, but he thanked me and took it.

I would love to write that something amazing has happened with Mark, but no more contact after that day has been responded--but this I do know--God's elect are being called in and prepared. Mark's heart was so good, and I felt how choice of a human being he is. It was an honor to share a red eye flight with him. And I praise God for providing a means! Oh I love flights!!

GOD WON'T YOU CHANGE HIM?
We were blessed to go to church on Sunday while in Florida. The Relief Society and Priesthood lessons were given on charity. The RS lesson was wonderful. The teacher was nervous, but had prepared with the spirit. Towards the last few mins of class an elderly sister in the back, visiting from Idaho (surely any wards around Disney World get a variety of members from all over coming) raised her hand. With quite some difficulty she painfully shared a very personal experience. She and her husband were called to serve a mission. She questioned the stake president because of her husbands loss of memory, but he assured her that they were needed. Off on their mission they went. She said the days and weeks went on, and her husband became worse. He could not remember appointments or dates. She said after him asking her for the 12th time what time church started, she just wanted to yell at him that she had already told him 11 times within the last 10 mins. This sweet sister, took her worries over to the Lord and expressed that she knew that God could heal her husband. That she didn't want to be the one with the only working memory. She fasted, prayed and pleaded with God to change and fix her husband for surely she should have to go one with him like how he was. The answer came--but competely different then she expected... the answer came that God would not heal her husband. Heavenly Father told this sister, "I am trying to teach you charity."

The sister was weeping and her voice was quivering sharing such a personal weakness. She said often times she just wanted to get angry with her husband and frustrated at how many times she has to repeat herself. She said she was deeply humbled that day, that God was using her husband to help her learn charity. That it was not her husband that needed fixing or to be changed--but it was her own weakness and lack of charity towards him.

This sister was crying and the rest of us were sniffing. Her comments stirred my soul. Patience is a christlike attribute. For surely the Lord is long suffering in our weaknesses and our selfishness. Impatience is a perfect manifestation of the lack of charity one's being is not claiming/using/manifesting. How her comments hit me in such a personal way.

Read this quote from President Hinkley tonight:

To those of you who live in troubled homes, may I suggest that you let love become the lodestar of your family life. There is too much of shouting, too much of recrimination, so many tears in the homes of some of our people. Love is the only remedy. It is the very basis of marriage. It can be nurtured and strengthened, or it can be starved and weakened. The power lies within ourselves. Bridle your tempers, husbands. Wives, hold your tongues. Revive the wondrous feeling that brought you to the marriage altar. --Gordon B. Hinckley

I thanked the sister afterwards for sharing her story. Still shaking she said she fought the prompting to share it all class, but finally could not fight off the spirit any longer. I apologized that she probably was suppose to share that story at least for me and thanked her for her courage in raising her hand.

Deep lesson on Charity. Deep reminder on how often my charity is not suffering long, patient, and/or kind. God is kind with all my weaknesses. And is patient. Can I not learn to be the same with others? My weaknesses may not be someone elses. And my faults-their strengths. My powers, their limitations. But God, who perfectly sees and views all, I think would have me be more kind, more patient, more quick to love then to criticize. Actually, unless directed by the spirit, I don't think there should be any room for criticism in my life. Criticism is surely not building. I pray to seek for more charity and the strength to exercise it's power to influence my thoughts, my heart, my tongue and my actions...

These are the words we sang in sacrament today. I sang hard and probably a little too loud, as my cheeks became wet...

As now we take the sacrament, our thoughts are turned to thee,
Thou Son of God, who lived for us, then died on Calvary.
We contemplate thy lasting grace, thy boundless charity;
To us the gift of life was giv’n for all eternity.

As now our minds review the past, we know we must repent;
The way to thee is righteousness— the way thy life was spent.
Forgiveness is a gift from thee we seek with pure intent.
With hands now pledged to do thy work, we take the sacrament.

As now we praise thy name with song, the blessings of this day
Will linger in our thankful hearts, and silently we pray
For courage to accept thy will, to listen and obey.
We love thee, Lord; our hearts are full. We’ll walk thy chosen way.

And so my life is this Sunday evening. A week seeking forgiveness, a week contemplating boundless charity.. Hands now pledge to do HIS work and courage to accept HIS will--TO listen and obey.... I love the Lord, my heart is full. I will walk His chosen way. Oh how I love God! The more I learn of Him and His doings, the more I stand all amazed.

PS. If you are just wanting a great 10 min reminder read this week CLICK HERE.

BE HIS

I received a text on Sunday morning asking if I would teach etiquette and dinner conversations to the Deaf Ward youth on Tues night. My First reaction was "heck no" however the spirit was quick to press to my mind that I needed to teach. Ask anyone in my family, when it comes to setting the table, I just get a letter grade of F! Maybe a D+ on a good day, but for the most part I can never remember which side the cup goes on or what side the fork goes on. Me teach etiquette, quite a joke of a thought.

And then dinner conversation?! Boy, the angels must have had a good chuckle when I texted back, "sure I will".

:)

In preparation for the evening, Tues I woke up and went walking. I flipped my ipod over to the Young women General conference presentation. I listened to a great talk, and then listened to the music played in a special presentation done at that event. The chorus to the song talked about being strong and of good courage. I enjoyed the music as I had not ever heard it before. And then, towards the end of the song, I heard it sung, "be His". The words stopped me dead in my tracks. I played that part of the song over and over. I have a list of a 100+ be's to be, but never have I heard the be to "be His". I LOVED IT! My eyes became moist as I thought of the girls and my opportunity to teach them.

Then right before I left work, I opened up an email from uncle Paul. There was a painting (the one at the top) in the email and a letter from the artist explaining his piece.

9 August 2010

The artist said:
"This painting was unique from its very beginning. It would be great if I could take credit for the composition and message it conveys but in my mind, that would be like Moses taking credit for bringing water from the stone in the desert.

"Usually when I have an idea for a painting it starts as a simple seed and it grows as I play with the image in my mind, moving the characters around, imagining the lights and shadows, the values and the colors, eventually deciding on its composition after what might be weeks or even months of pondering and sketches, but this painting was different. There was no seed, no moving of characters, it was totally different.

"I was sitting in church on a Sunday afternoon as the Sacrament was being passed and bang, there it was, the image was instantaneously placed before my mind's eye just as you see it here. This experience has happened to me only three times and it has been very special each time." --Doc Christensen

For the past two months I have been trying hard to ponder on the Savior during the preparation and participating of the sacrament. Confession, I am guilty of that being the time I am pleading for help or pleading for whatever I am in need of that week. But I have wanted to focus so badly on just Jesus Christ. When I saw this picture, I was moved. I love the look of each family member as they realize or see who is passing their sacrament. I thought I might like the picture better in black and white, but nope--it is perfect the way it is.

Looking at the picture is how I want every time I take the sacrament to be. So beautiful and sacred, and the Savior, suffered/loves me perfectly.

... And thanks to this artist Doc Christensen who followed an impression to paint. I love it!

The evening with the yw and ym went great! All my old girls that I used to teach 2 years ago, are all grown up and even more beautiful inside and out then I could have imagined them. I was grateful for the experience. As I pulled up to the church, Bishop Larson pulled up next to me. Seeing him and his family always does good for my soul! God helped me teach two subjects I am lacking in. He was very kind.

Our Heritage Makers reunion was a great sucess. So many amazing people to meet and see. It was truly a week of miracles and of God.
Meet Jeremy! This is Patti's son. By being around him last week and seeing how positive he was, even with 110 degree heat, put me in my place. By the end of working with him I was/am bound and determined to be a better person. Jeremy really has a good heart. And I love that he is a hard worker. I LOVE people who know how to work! It is a big deal for me.
Speaking of hard workers, each of these women at some point last week made me want to cry. How is that I am blessed to work with such women!?!

Starting with Debbi on the left. She is very organized/blessed with the gift of having it all together.

Then there is Marin, our HM designer. I can tell you I have never enjoyed working with a designer as much as I have enjoyed working with her. Before reunion I had a couple marketing ideas to be sold at reunion. Instead of her trying to sell me on why her design was good and how she would not budge (this is an example of past designers I have worked with, not an example of her), she constantly would ask me if what I was looking at was what I envisioned. My projects turned out because one, God is amazing and inspired some pretty cool items to create, but two because her heart is so willing to design to what people envision. Ego is not to be found in her. I love working with her.

On my left you will find Susan. She is Don's (our director over marketing and creative) wife. She didn't get paid for being there, and yet didn't mind. She said she just likes being around the consultants and hearing the new things. She and her husband are great folks. Not only is Susan a hard worker, she is fast! I loved working with her in the store.

Then Jen, is next to my right. I have found in her someone who loves God. She is so willing to serve. By the end of the week, and this banquet we were all exhausted from early mornings, late nights and little, if any sleep. Four straight days of this heavy schedule, but there was Jen after banquet already with her gown off so she could start packing all our presentations up. Love that girl!

And then of course, last on the right is Patti! My Boss, and mission blessing!

I hope she won't mind me sharing this... but before reunion there was a night when her son had quite the episode and left the house and started to walk but not in a right state of mind. Patti followed after him wanting to make sure he would be okay and to help calm him down. A few miles they walked, each with no shoes, in the middle of the night. When Patti felt she had done all she needed to do to calm down his thinking, she called her husband to come and get her and to bring her son's shoes to him so that he could wear them.

Her son was complaining to me how messed up his feet were with walking two miles without shoes and blamed it partly on Patti. ... what was so tender to me was the love of a mother. Little thought did he give to his mother's feet who where all cut up and a little raw--feet that had a big week ahead of being stood on and in uncomfortable shoes all day long for four days straight. But Patti never complained and didn't say anything. She told me the story right after we had devotional one night. She had just mentioned her feet being sore and cut up. I drug the story out of her. Patti went off to bed, and I went into the bathroom and on my knees cried as I prayed. Oh the love of a mother. Oh to us kids that have no idea the sacrifices and love our parents show forth. My own mom and dad always giving so much with no return of anything--at least usually.

I love Patti. I love my parents. Oh to the moms and dads out there who don't give up on their children and their sometimes (and sometimes often) stupid acts of agency. Nyk had quite a team in AZ. She hit Gold Director in Heritage Makers! Lots of women asked me how she was doing, and I was straight with them. Nykki is the most amazing woman I have ever met with covenant making with the Lord. When she gets a go a head with partnering with God with whatever--NOTHING can stop her from achieving it. I am sure for the Nephi in us, I would have gone back one and maybe even twice to get the brass plates, but three times? I think I would have written off the second time of, "I tried, and that must have been the test because it didn't work." But not Nyk. If she gets the okay/go a head from God that what she is about to do, or is perusing is okay--she puts all of her money in the bank and KNOWS that God will do his part. I learn a lot from this awesome little sister of mine! Little, because physically she is, but her spirit is a giant!

Does anyone know what type of tree that has flowers like this!?!?

This is my biggest regret of last week. I would walk past this tree oh, maybe 10 or so times a day. And when the blossoms are open, they make a perfect tight little star. This is a picture of the blossoms the morning I left. They were not quite open into the tight little star... but every day I would walk by this tree and every time I did I would look up to admire the stars. Lots of the flowers come to think of it at the resort were star shaped. Every time I looked at them, they made me think of God. A new star led the way for the wise men, and like the saying at Christmas time, "wise men still seek him". I want to be a wise woman and seek him always and forever.

This week on the "alter" I had the thought that I needed to place my heart before God. That meant that I was in for something that was going to break my heart. As I have been pondering this all week, really, I just want to do what God would have me do. Serving him and seeing people come closer to him is I think, the greatest joy I could experience at this time in my life. I am constantly amazed at the Christlike people that are planted in my path.

God sure does like to spoil me! And if I will follow him, he will not lead me astray.

My prayers have become more plead filled for asking for him to make me a tool. I don't want my will, or rather I want my will to become his will for me. He knows what is best. He never forsakes us or leaves us alone. He is my rock! He is salvation! He is hope and peace in the mist of a storm. In Him, I will put all my trust.

BE HIS!

This is what I want and will work on.

God is good. :)