ARGH! Dress Shopping!

Over 40 Friday Follow!

I thought that I would enjoy the

dress shopping process.

My normal uniform is jeans and nice tops

If we go out I dress up by wearing

better pants and higher heals.

As a Mother of the Groom in October

I don't think pants are going to work

I know that,

and I was looking forward to getting dressed up

for a change.

But I still don't know HOW dressy to get

for a casual outdoor wedding.

In the woods and trees kind of outdoor,

not a manicured lawn or garden.

Long dress or knee length dress?

I just found out he Mother of the Bride

is going with the short style.

So I will try to do that.

But I am overweight and the

dressingroom

mirrors are making me very unhappy!

And again I say

ARGH!

(Yes, I added "Menopause" as a subject label because my weight has nothing to do with eating junk and forgetting to exercise!)

OK, Next Day....Just did a full hour of yoga and high - low aerobics...take that, unsightly flab!!

Just Call Me Brenda-Barbie!

You all are being allowed in on my slow ascent into Photoshop stardom! Actually this amazing piece of inspiration you see was not done on PS (still need to watch the tutorials) but through other things on my marvelous Mac.

I realize it is a mess, I did not figure out how to erase the grey around Barbie's bubble head. But that is not why I am showing this to you & putting aside all my dignity for a moment.

I'm posting this because after spending a good amount of time working/playing around with putting Barbie's head on my shoulders, I laughed out loud at myself! Here's the funny....why in the world did I put her head on MY BODY? It's HER BODY that I want & crave. (That sentence could really be wrong if taken out of context.)

I mean really! My head & hair are not so bad, but oh man, I am totally exasperated with my bod & it's new found menopause lumps, bumps & jiggles!

The only drawback to having her body is that I'm not crazy about wearing only high heels all the time!

Favorite Gift & Blog Talk

Tonight's post is going to be a two-parter.
Part 1- I came across this pic from my file of Favorite Things. This is a gift I got for Christmas last year & I still love it a lot. It's a metal flower with magnet on the back that holds pictures in the flower petals. It is on my fridge, isn't it cool? I love that it is super simple to change the photos whenever you want without frames, glue etc. I often do themes, like holiday pics, or vacation pics, or all me & hubs. One time I did all pics of the boys getting their first haircuts, you get the idea. As you can see the current collection is my boys hanging out together over the years, so of course the tv is in 50% of them! My SIL gave this to me last Christmas & I think she had a cute idea. Simple things can often be the best gifts.
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Part 2- Blogging is a truly fascinating phenomenon, don't you think? Here we all are, typing our little hearts out to one another with abandon. Sharing just enough, some too much, some not enough to keep you coming back. We love the idea of speaking to strangers but immediately begin to form friendships & "Followers" & clubs & blogroll groups.

I enjoyed the idea that no one out "here" knows me yet, so I would be free to express myself without self-editing. But now when I sit down to write, I am picturing my 18 precious subscribers & I feel like I am writing them a letter instead of sending out an anonymous musing about life. I want you to keep liking me enough to come back, so is that leading me to self-edit again? I hope not.

It's very possible that we as social beings, cannot stop ourselves from gathering into groups with common desires or viewpoints. That's not a bad thing but I am determined not to only read blogs of people just like me. I like me, but I need a broader view on life. No it's not really that I NEED a broader view, I am just hungry for it now.

At first I was afraid (warning whenever THAT word comes up!) that anyone under 50 would never want me to be leaving them a comment on their young & stylish blog. I avoided the blogs that were all about raising children because that is not my life anymore. I even looked up all the blogs that mention "menopause" thinking that since that is where I am, that is where I should stay! Unfortunately, I found most of those to be terribly depressing & cranky! THAT is NOT where I am! I am ready to laugh about menopause & there are some blogs that see the humor in this crazy season of life, but even those were often interspersed with many posts about how awful it is to get old, or describing their latest doctor visits in detail! No thanks.

So I began to leave short, tentative comments on blogs that lifted me up, made me laugh or smile. Even if they were way younger than I am. I figured, "Well, they can come see me & then ignore me if they want. I won't be too pushy." The great thing is that now I have a good variety of people who comment me & I "follow", because you lovely people responded openly with warmth & lots of words of encouragement. I have been pleasantly surprised!

I love blogging! It's so fun to come across another blogger in "real life" because they get it. Others get a strange & befuddled look on their face when I mention getting "tagged" or given an award or talk about linking. It is a difficult thing to explain to non-bloggers isn't it? This weird & perverse need to put our words & inner selves out there. Why do we do it? ..........I believe it may have something to do with finding others who are like us........and finding those who are different from us.....and still enjoying all of us.

Menopause Sucks!

At this moment I am grateful to myself that I have not allowed my other website to cross-pollinate with this one. Only 2 people in my daily life know about this little sanctuary of expression & that gives me complete freedom to say loudly & clearly that menopause sucks, a lot!

I am so tired of sitting in a staff meeting in a circle of 15 people & suddenly feeling the inner warmth creeping up my body from the inside out & quickly making itself visible on my neck & face! I force my hand not to reach for some paper to fan myself & just will the sweat to dry up on it’s own before anyone looks my way. My face turns bright red & blotchy & once my glasses even steamed up! It is just so embarrassing & uncomfortable. It seems like my body is betraying me after so many years of getting along pretty well with each other.

The other awful symptom that has me baffled is the unexplained weight gain. I practically live on yogurt & salad. I love them & really do eat one or the other almost every day for lunch at work & at home. But this last year I am getting puffy & soft all over the place. My neck & arms are moving when they are not supposed to, yuck! I used to be able to get rid of tummy fat with a few extra exercises in the morning & skipping desserts for a bit. Yesterday in my new swimsuit the little rolls just loved moving right into the “slimmer & shaper” panel of extra material.

But the part that is really bugging me today is the mental fogginess that is showing up lately. I am getting more forgetful & starting to not trust my memory. This can be brutal in the middle of an argument with your husband when you realize that maybe you did not do what you think you remember doing! Ack! It kind of takes the wind out of your sails.

Last week I bought a whole cartload of food at our Super Wal-Mart & as I stepped outside into our scorching heat I headed to where I had parked the car & it was not there! I circled the area with that heavy & awkward shopping cart realizing that I was probably giving someone some great entertainment. So I decided to push the car unlock button on my key & listen for the beep. Nothing! My ice cream was already getting mushy by this time & I was so not wanting to call my husband & make him come on his motorcycle to help me find the stupid car!

After several wanderings around the hot parking lot I headed back to the shade of the store & called him. Just as I hung up I saw the car……in a whole different section! I quickly called him back as I wrestled the cart of soggy food to the car. Once the trunk was loaded & I put the key in the ignition, the car rebelled at all the button pushing I had done & began to beep & honk, loudly alarming everyone to the fact that an intruder must be trying to start it. I forgot how to make it stop! I waited for it to be quiet & when I turned the key again the alarm screamed again, so I called my amazing husband for the second time, yelling above the alarm that I did not know how to make it stop & let me get back home. He told me to push the unlock button on the key & it would stop announcing to everyone that an idiot was at the wheel. He did not say the idiot part, that’s me talking to me; we were not getting along at all at this point!

The only good part of that story is that I drove home laughing at myself. A couple years ago I would have been crying all the way home. There are some good things about being over 50, & one is that I don’t take myself as seriously as I used to. I don’t expect perfection anymore. Good thing huh?