My Story

Hello there and let me warn you. I'm about to post a very long entry. Its completely up to you whether you choose to read it or not but i am here to share something very personal.

People, i mean people that know me have been flooding my inbox with a simple question.
Why Hijab? Why change? What makes you wanna change?

Well, at first i was a bit confused seeing all these people asking me those question. I did not expect that people will want to know the reason because as a muslimah covering your aurat is a must. So what could other reason be?

What makes me wanna change?

Well, it is just that i have come to the point of my life that i am done chasing things that i know are not permanent.

It all started when i was waiting for my SPM results. I came across a video on youtube about a chinese girl that converts into Islam.

She said that she is upset looking at Islam girls that do not know how lucky we are to be born as a Muslim. And how careless we are to be carried away with western culture.

She had a lot of challenges just to get into Islam. Her family even isolated her. She fought so hard just to be in Islam while i on the other hand haven't do anything.

And that hit me right on the face. I looked myself in the mirror and a simple question pop-ed out. What kind of Islam are you Lala? I was so jealous on how a chinese girl could get that kind of Allah's blessings and how stupid i am to have not seek and beg for His guidance.

After that incident, my heart seemed not to be in the right mood. I always feels like something is missing some where. My sense of fashion changed too.

I started to notice that girls in Tudung are more attractive than the others and how sweet they look covering their parts of body as a symbol of respecting themselves.

That is when I decided to wear one too. But before that happens, I tend to over thinked.

Should i wait until i get married first? What if I lose some friends due to these changes? Can i really throw all my clothes away and starts to wear something different? Can i still be me?

Those questions ran through my mind every single day.

I asked for Allah's help and guidance in my do'a and I went to my sister and told her everything. Her answer was :

" Nak berubah ke arah kebaikkan tu tak akan merugikan lansung. Biasalah banyak ragu2 dalam hati sebab syaitan cemburu akan perubahan yang bakal kita lakukan, sebab dia dah gagal"

That opened my eyes and made me think,

"Changing into a better version of me, what could i lose? Nothing, simply nothing :)"

People that keep me going till now.

This hijrah that i made also helped me in realizing which are my real friends and which guy are sincere towards me rather than just wanting to have fun :):)


p/s : To girls out there that have that feeling of wanting to change, even a slightest feeling, just do it. Do it before the feelings go away. You won't lose anything infact you will gain something even more meaningful :)

love,
Lala