"This isn't even the
WORST movie we've
ever made."



I had two immediate thoughts upon seeing trailers for the upcoming movie "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry."


1. Ugh.

2. Why didn't I think of this? I totally could've written this.


Don't look at me like that. It beats getting a real job.

Someone, please read my spec scripts and hire me! Please...

NY POST-er boy

Don't mean to brag, but I just happen to be quoted AGAIN in the NY Post. I'm becoming something of a subject matter expert 'round these parts, no?

No, probably not. But still.

Pick up a copy of the NY Post. Turn to pages 77-78.

Enjoy the hilarity of true stories of NYC catcalls.

Here's my li'l contribution. It's one of the reasons I love the NYC subways.

* And That's Just What They'll Tell Their Grandchildren, Too

A crowded F train pulls into the West Fourth Street stop, and a very attractive woman in a business suit steps in. Immediately, she catches the attention of a young gentleman who looks like Snoop Dogg and sounds like Busta. He cries out, "Damn, your booty fine!" and then proceeds to expound upon this thought, unleashing a veritable tidal wave of nonstop street poetry, describing every last detail of how fine her body was and just what he would do to it, given the chance. For five stops. Finally, at York Street, she casually rises, puts a finger to his lips and hushes him, slips her number into his hand and remarks, "You had me at, 'Damn, your booty fine.'" And with that, she disappears into the cool, Brooklyn night air. I like to think they're married now.

- Benari Poulten, 29, Manhattan

Thanks again, Mandy!

double post fun

Yeah. That's right. I posted the same exact thing elsewhere.

It's a zillion degrees out today. This is what you get.


What a predicament. Dick Cheney, the Vice President of the United States, has declared that he is actually a part of the legislative branch (despite what Article II of the United States Constitution says) and therefore exempt from having to comply with an executive order (which President Bush updated 4 years ago) to safeguard classified documents and turn them over to the National Archives.

And yet, the classified documents his office is hiding just might offer history its most important and illuminating glimpse into the inner workings of this administration.

And while I support Representative Rahm Emmanuel's move to cut the VP's executive branch funding, it still doesn't address just HOW to wrest the records from his icy cold grip.

If only the Congress could come up with some kind of plan that they know the Vice President already agrees with.

If only the government ran some kind of...secret, warrantless wiretapping program. Where the merest suspicion of wrongdoing could lead to a complete and thorough review of all materials, documents, and/or records...

Either that, or dispatch a Jack Bauer-like agent to "persuade" him to turn over the records. That always works.

Hey, since you've read this far, swing by The tank tonight at 8PM if you're in the neighborhood. And you haven't melted into the sidewalk.

I guess we have different definitions

When I think of "Power Couples," I think of such legendary romantic team-ups like:

Bogie & Bacall.
Bill & Hillary.
Beyonce & Jay-Z.
Johnson & Johnson.

But according to this "Yahoo Headline" report from LiveScience.com, I guess power couples aren't all that...powerful?

More than half of all "power couples," in which both spouses are college graduates, live in large metropolitan areas. Researchers have long assumed the couples migrate to the cities.

"...'power couples,' in which both spouses are college graduates..."


A college graduate? Really? That's all it takes to be part of a power couple? For real?

Hm.

Because I'm a college graduate. Twice over, actually. And, um...it's not all that filled with power.

But perhaps some lucky lady out there - one with a sparkly college degree - can change all that.

Ladies?

It's been a busy day for the High Court

Supreme Court tells US Taxpayers: "You can't tell the government what to do with YOUR money!"

The Supreme Court ruled Monday that ordinary taxpayers cannot challenge a White House initiative that helps religious charities get a share of federal money.

High Court rules that organizations with lots of money can say whatever they want...

...but students can't!

"every other day of the week is fine..."

Mondays. Argh.

Stumbled upon this little nugget of internet fun and I thought I would share, because that's the kind of guy I am. Or "yam," in this case:

Popeye vs. Hulk

Charming and stylish, it's a pretty complete tale of triumph and defeat, love and lust, power and pride. And then, after a lengthy, origin-style set-up, it's lots of fighty-time goodness.



I particularly like M. Rasheed's cartoonish slickness. The evocative expressions of the titular sailor man exude a joyful energy and his Sal Buscema-esque Hulk reminds me of just how much I adored the Mantlo-Buscema era of the Incredible Hulk.

The comic perhaps goes on a bit too long, Olive Oyl comes off a little - ahem - flat, and I'm not crazy about phrases like: "...the sailor's weird reality-altering powers...." And I can't say I totally agree with the ending, but it does wrap up neatly and it's definitely worth a read.

If this were a story from the Mantlo-Buscema run, it would have ended with the Hulk beating Popeye, but Olive rejecting him ayway, standing by her man and tending to her wounded sailor. Confused, the Hulk would amble off into the cold night air, wondering what he did wrong, thinking sadly to himself, "Maybe Hulk doesn't want to be left alone, after all..."

An important message from Kevin Church

Because we like to drink.

I like crazy girls

I always kind of knew I liked crazy chicks, but I had no idea that my ideal superhero gal would be CAH-RAZY.




Aurora and Black Canary are my runner-ups, I guess.

Via Patrick.

Is J from C the Beyonder?

Anyone watching HBO's new series, John From Cincinnati?

I get the whole "John from Cincinnati could possibly equal the Big JC" thing, but as a comic book geek, I couldn't have been the only one who thought he might also resemble a certain someone else from Beyond.

Does

equal

?

If all the surfers end up fighting some kind of secret war on a battle planet, we'll know for sure.

It's been a long time...

Yeah, so.

To everyone that hasn't heard from me in weeks:

I was at Ft. Meade in Maryland. Getting up to speed on all the latest and greatest in military propag...er, Public Affairs.

I have a lot of catching up to do. Too much to comment on regarding the past three weeks, so le's just start fresh, shall we?

Item #1: Show tomorrow night at the Tank.

Item #2: Actual conversation regarding my future as a dramatic writer:

Mom: You don't really want to be Arthur Miller, do you?

Me: No. I want to be Stan Lee!

There you have it, true believers! Regular content will now resume.

Excelsior!

radio silence

Doing Army stuff. That's where I've been. I'd say more, but...you know the rest.

So, in lieu of content, here's photographic evidence of me rocking out the 'Roke at Sam's wedding, courtesy of Tim.