rockin' my world.: June 2006

ACT.455 - enough is enough .

hey , stop it lah . it really gets nowhere and whatever .

to this so called " her friend " , you don't like what i blog , just fuck off and never come back . and go find out properly first .

don't anyhow accuse .

i have my right to blog whatever i want , and you have the every right to choose to see it , AND SHUT UP . or just dun click on this link ever again . get it ?

ACT.454 - life's such a pussy . that you've just gotta FUCK it .

well ok , here we are , 2 more days to the race . =) excitement fills me and i bet the other guys as well . i know what's ahead is really ugly , but it's ok . cause one real hard fall , will help us to work even harder than ever b4 .

and yeah , one day , i go up to rajeev and tell him : " hey , life's such a pussy man . "

and he go : " yeah . Life's such a pussy , that you've just gotta FUCK it . "

haha , ain't it darn true . i can't agree more .

and yeah , my junior came up to me today cheekily and asked me , why so many vulgarities in my conversations . sigh , these guys are too innocent . haha , welcome to this world of db , i tell ya . anyway , from the influence of NCC / ARMY as well , vulgarities is your 2nd best weapon other than ur rifle . LOVE IT , and i'll never STOP using it . haha , i bet everybody can't imagine me one day , without them . esp ALEX . ya ? haha .

YA , one fucker appeared each on our tuesday training , and another on thursday . and why did i always missed such moments . sigh . here's some advice to you , DB is really not the club to offend . really .

anyway , it was a really fun day , with me starting off sch , sleeping as usual , having great lunch at SIM [ i tell ya the western food rocks ] and all that . =) and DRAGONBOAT was great .

i'll see you there , my bros . the 5mins of fame , we've all been waiting for .

ACT.453 - WTF.

spain lost . 3-1 to france . WTF . i watched france for a few matches and they were like shit . totally . but what the heck happened today ?

sigh . what happened to spain . they played so well in the last 3 games . i waited 4 years for Spain to play . after getting defeated by korea by penalty , quarterfinals in 2002 . and when they already scored one goal and that fucktard referee said it was out .

sian . another wait of 4 years again . and Germany is up against Argentina . argentina is said to be the winner of the world cup . and germany has to face them so early also . SIGH . =(

ACT.452 - you always want what you can't have .

face it . many of us are too selfish . we always want what we can't have , and usually expecting our partners to perform what they can't .

and yeap , you've got it . i'm just your regular , simple , your next door Joe. I can't give much , just love , care and concern . and sometimes , i see that's not enough . the language this world speaks , undyingly shines . that language is money.

well , my mum always tells me . we'll just lead our simple and happy lives . we don't need to be rich to be happy and all that .

we once had our luxurious part of life . and we lost it all . in just a couple of months . But i guess , we're doing fine now , and pretty happy . We might be poor now , so much things that we missed out cause we can't afford , but we still are happy . Whatever extra branded stuff i need , i have to find means and ways to get them myself .

so , who am i to really give u more than love and care . when i'm just a kid at 19 , still struggling with his studies , and having $200 a month . which is barely enough for me to eat and club once a month . or whatever . buffet .

because from once a guy who never did needed to care about $$$ , to a loser with not even a cent in his pockets , i knew how hard it is to get every cent .

but it all doesn't seem enuf for you. you wanted more than just me .

and really ... i think my poly mates know it best . Sometimes , i'm left even without ten cents in my wallet . the only value on me is my EZ link card .

it's ok . i know i'm a poor ass . unwanted by girls . i'm not handsome , i'm not rich , i dun have a car , i dun have a bike , i can't bring my girl to posh restaurants always , i can't buy her designer stuff . and all i give is my heart .

everything is so fucked up , i tell ya . good bye and lead your life with the tons of guys u have .

sigh . what a world . i guess dating has to even stop . it's not working out at all . haha , i think i shld just be content with my gi kian . WAHAHAHA . that sounds so GAY .

anyway , i was chilling out with Sin Wee last friday . haha , caught " just my luck " which i tot initially was a GIRL movie cause you know , u see lindsay lohan and you go , GIRLS movie . haha , it was ok .. but .... =S

haha , it was fun hanging out with her and we have always wanted to meet each other more often , but too busy . haha . i think she's coming to support me this weekend . =) and she's going europe AGAIN for a mth . haha . gonna miss that girl .

and congrats to DLB / isabel for removing her braces ! looking good with that set of teeth i tell ya !

ok , gonna do some bullshit report and it's gonna be SPAIN VS FRANCE . GO SPAIN !

all the way npdb . some fuckers said we ain't gonna make it . i tell ya , we're there. just wait . JUST WAIT .

ACT.451 - purely m.e.

well , another issue's done and over with . =)

i'm gonna resume my life which i loved , and i have missed out on . the time before dating last year . it was so great , just gymming with the guys , hanging out , looking at hot chicks in lido . just feel free baby .

only now then i've realised, singlehood really ROCKS i tell ya ! and besides , i just wanna get my studies over and done with , get my ass into NS and out of NS , and then uni and kick start some cash earning . and i dun need love to affect this journey of mine at all .

and i only give 1 chance . if u lost it yourself , i don't care how or whatever , i'll never think back . and i dun understand why , you , wan xin , really want it .

and now i think back , all my ex girlfriends are all , SHOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED cases . haha , maybe back then , i'm still much a kid . i dun know what i want and all that . and still get dumped 3 times . hahahaha . and yes , i'm still so much of a kid now .

ok , well , my same old brand new life starts once again . =) i'm just lovin' it .

ACT.450 - Move Along.

heart is broken . flame has died . time has passed . she's not mine .

after a year , i finally opened up my heart again , but yet to find it broken again . and again later on . and again recently .

i was in a complex in between , here and there , got over it , and got into it again , and again .

but somehow , my mind is firm this time . cause i know i'll get hurt again for sure . i can never gain love from any girl . L.O.V.E. i say .

sigh . love got me and all my buddies in a real tough rollercoaster ride .

anyway , JUNE race is in a week . sat and sunday the team is doing good , we'll just gotta go for it .

ps : if anybody wants to come down to bedok reservoir to support me , tell me all right ? bring an entire team of cheerleaders with ya . WAHAHAHA .

ACT.449 - miracles .

a miracle . again . thank heaven for it . you've saved us once again . although things doesn't seem so bright , but i think it's good enough .

now , it's just left for us to face reality . the monster we all dun want to meet .

ACT.448 - i saw you in the rearview mirror . passing me by.

another day at training . well all was good . haha , actually , i had fun today . we went to Geylang to eat dinner today after training . Chicken rice sucks , as well as the dou jiang you tiao . my dou jiang barely has the sweetness it used to have . =( to think that i was craving for it , all these while .

and that foreign chinese guy serving us , has such bad attitude . I SO wanted to f***ed him upside down . i've learnt the way of life . You can't tolerate all your life , cause it doesn't do any good . Any bullshit happens , GAN the person . =) and i'll make sure he'll have the time of his life .

like that cinema boy in Causeway pt , asking colin for our ICs , V for Vendatta NC 16 .

anyway , talking about Geylang , we took a tour ard . wahahahaha , it was fun i tell ya . from lorong 8 to lorong 10 . and i tell u , soon , we'll make a few more trips to sweep the entire geylang . haha . this is what bo liao people do lah . seriously .

haha , wah , i've realised one thing . it's so hard to catch up with buddies and close friends ! MAY ANNE ! you're much more busier than me ! haha .

sin wee. angelia . hmmm .. let me think . JIA EN ! where the heck is this guy from OCS . and tons more lah . there are so many that i can't even think of .

oh ya , did i say Gi Kian left already ? he's gonna be back ard August . =) sigh . my gay partner is always overseas . =( i need some GAY LOVIN' from my lover . WAHAHAHAHAHAHA .

haha , i think the 2 of us really look like gay partners lei . dun know how many ppl ask liao . shit man.... so many people discovered our secret . =X

long day tomorrow , with project and training . =)

will you go or will you stay.

ACT.447 - the questionable - love love love.

tuesday again . and that means DB Training again . =) and wed thurs sat and sunday . and it'll be the end of 2 weeks break . and that means , 6 projects submission . sigh .

i'm supposed to go to sch today morning to get materials for my project , Purchasing Management , which the internet have NONE . nothing about the topic OUTSOURCING .

haha , but i watched Spain vs Tunisia ytd . so i'm pretty tired when dad called me up and say " HEY ! GO TO SCH ! "

wah lao eh , Tunisia's goal freaked me out manx . but nvm , spain won anyway . but things dun look that good . I MUST WATCH ARGENTINA !

anyway , now my bronze colour fighting fish seems more lively than ever . haha , sometimes , going crazy in front of the glass panel of the tank . swimming like as if there's something there or sth .

haha , now i suspect there's sth wrong . like as if some psychological problem . too much chlorine ? or too acidic the water ? haha . WTF sia . or did it lose a companion ? then now is like depression ? =\ i must get it a FIERCE buddy soon .

I hope you're doing ok . i've got no idea what happened but you know you always have me . and i'll be there for ya til i'm dead , or maybe like what i told you , me going to China to be a monk . =) catch up with you , real soon.

ACT.446 - JUNE RACE .

how much you put in , is how much you're gonna get .

there isn't anything called God to save you . or worse , miracles.

" pray while you can . cause god isn't here today . "

ACT.445 - sigh .

my blue fighting fish died . i think there was sth wrong with the water . hai , so sian about it .

and now my dad bought me another one . a blue and small one , with no impressive fins . WHERE GOT FIERCE ? =
i bought these pair the other day , cause they're FIERCE . LOOK FIERCE .

now buy this tiny one , i give the impression that i really like tiny and cute stuff -__-"" i rather not have this blue fish .

but never mind .. it's lively though . maybe as time goes by , the fins will show and LOOK FIERCE . =)

my dad just dun believe they dun eat normal fish food . tell him how many times liao , they only eat those darn worms , he dun believe . still feed them with normal fish food and ended up polluting the tank with lots of shit and leftover flaks. =(

sigh ... i've realised , i can't get along with my parents . we always quarrel or disagree with the smallest things on earth . i dun know why . i didn't intended anything . i've worked so hard for my studies not bcos of myself , it's all for them . so that i'll get a stable career , and buy my dad his Mercedes and all that . but why say all these discouraging words . =\

ACT.444 - NO WONDER

i know why my fighting fishes haven't been eating . THEY DUN LIKE NORMAL FOOD .

"Brine shrimp, Daphnia, plankton, tubifex, glassworms, and beef heart, are all excellent options that may be found frozen or freeze dried. If flake food is fed, it should be supplemented with frozen and freeze-dried foods, and if possible live foods."

so out i hurried to get some blood worms for them , with my buddy ,edwin leong. haha , ended up spending 2 hrs in 2 fish shops . he bought a metallic blue fighting fish , while i just ended up with the frozen blood worm packet .

what's more ,we bought $1 fighting fishes each . FOR ?

to allow what fighting fishes supposed to do . FIGHT . wahahaha , just for fun , it's $1 only . and that freaking edwin says he will train his one , with what his dad teach him . -.- i'm much too busy to spend effort to train , i hear already , so tedious .

and i hurried home , to feed my babies , and they ENJOYED their meal . =) haha , freaking bastards , fussy about food .

well , i guess humans are also the same . fussy about almost everything . esp food .

wahahah , kind of GLAD now . going for bbq in a while , with the class .

after saving up another sum of cash , i'll probably get another 4 of these beauties . i mean .. since i can't have dogs , might as well have some easy-to-maintain pets .

well , my parents gave me total freedom sia . ALMOST total freedom . i can club , i can pub , i can do anything i want , except for smoking , and some usual stuff . like cycling . sigh , they always think i'll get knocked down by some car on a pavement . =
haha , i can't believe i went home with blonde hair the other time , and they were ok with it , no comments at all .

wahahah .. a TATTOO next . =D

ACT.443 - my world's in a standstill .

i'm a lost boy . very . the thing that's been the core of my life , is on the rocks , on the line . are we gonna stay this way ?

we ask ourselves , what's wrong . and frankly speaking ,we have no answers . and i'm now starting to doubt myself . i'm starting to even lose trust in myself .

sigh , are our dreams gonna be dashed like this ?

i've been feeding my fighting fishes once a day . and they don't EAT at all . WHY ??!! normal fishes can crave up to 3 meals a day . why these don't ? are they borned such strong independent individuals ?

never eat , yet have such lively movements . amazing pair . i think i have a lot of learn from this pair of fishes . although that sounds really lame. haha .

shun de challenged me . on saturday , race day , if i don't speak loudly , no vulgarities in the day , he bet there will be lots of girls noticing me . and i jolly well accepted that challenge . on the condition , that i wear my contact lenses , and do my hair . NO VULGARITIES CAMPAIGN ON saturday ! here we go ! he'll be so wrong . =)

ACT.442 - WORLD CUP !

spain vs ukraine . wahaha , simply beautiful game play . the other time , they lost to KOREA. WHY ???!!! haha .

and i can't wait to see more of them . and germany as well .

haha , Casillas jersey is so NICE ! i'm gonna get my hands on one of them , and that reminds of my bank a/c . i'm so BROKE !

after i got my salary , i bought so much stuff . omg , i'm such a spendthrift on clothes . haha . but the 2 fighting fish sure rocks . =)

wahahaha , feel a sense of satisfaction now . CAUSE SPAIN WON . wahaha . anyway ... hope we have a good training today anyway .

ALL THE WAY , NPDB . =D

ACT.441 - a change of heart , i don't believe .

i bought 2 fighting fish from Qian Hu's fair in Junction 8 . One is a sea blue and another is bronze . haha =) they are my new loves now . BEAUTIFUL ! and lively , they dun just stay in one spot of their new square mini tank .

Well , a change of heart , so easily , so quickly . i feel relieved , as well as , a bit speechless .

Forbidden love , i always thought . But now i know , the reason behind it all . Only after the entire incident .

sigh . i'm not fated to love , or be loved .

i dun care for now . June race is only 2 weeks ahead . Inter poly is this week , saturday , but i'm not rowing . The year 2s are .

defend our first placing for us , guys . do your best .

the question of faith and trust are on our minds . i say , we forget about it , dun think about it , JUST GO . just freaking row like you never did in ur lives.

like what i said ... " switched off your consciousness and row like you never did . neglecting the pain , the fatigue. "

ACT.440 - freedom.

arrhh , i smell perfect freedom once again in my life . just study , and db . that's what i want . and working when i have the time , and indulging in clothes , clothes , clothes =) and of cos my technology needs .

sigh , what a roller coaster right .

my temper is always my weakness , not to mention , something that everyone knows , my pride .

hmmm ,haha , luckily isabel [ dl buddy ] was there to chill me down . haha , if i continue like that , cannot lah , i'll start to become a frenzy killer in the streets .

sigh , life goes on . beautifully .

i just only wanna focus on dragonboat and studies . i don't need any more distractions .

i'll bid you goodbye , from that day onwards , we walk our own paths , may you achieve your dream . thanks for letting me feel loved for awhile , for keeping my cold heart intact .

i guess , i've gotta learn to start to appreciate memories and even bad ones . isn't it ? well , you and i , it was a moment to remember .

right now , after thinking through , i don't blame you for anything . not for the complex you're in , not for who you are , not for what you have done . I just want to appreciate the memories . and thank you for it . i just hope we continue to be friends . but you've gotta give me time .

thanks for all the warmth you gave me .

ACT.439 - fuck you all .

girls are sophisticated . they do things and never account for consequences .

and pls , you know i'm not talking about all girls , or pinpointing you .

stop it with , " i lost faith . " , " there isn't good guys on this earth . " , " guys ain't understanding " etc.

i think you girls who said all this , is just muttering bullshit .

and the girls i have wooed b4 ,if you still can say good guys dun exist , seriously , FUCK YOU .

and surprisingly , my best friend is a girl . but she's somehow different . as well as my dl buddy , valarie , and a couple more .

just that the ones i have met .

there you have it . you get the conclusion now . my fate is fucking me up .

[ ps : i'm not talking about all girls . there are angels on this earth too . as well as a lot of mother fuckers. and i'm not pinpointing you , you know who you are . i'm more pissed about my past experiences . ]

ACT.438 - just running in circles all the time.

there's nothing called love in my life .

i guess i'm turning all cold after this . complexity no more . i told may anne , since love is never gonna work out for me , might as well just accept my fate . there's no running away from it , or changing it .

so , i start my new path again . not gonna date anymore for the next couple of years , it's been fixed .

love only brings trouble to my life . which i have seriously no need for .

and pls , i dun need my friends to tag at my blog , to have faith and all that . if you read this post , just keep quiet or say other stuff . Dun try to tell me , that the right one hasn't come , and so on . pls , i really appreciate it .

so ... lady shifu in taiwan , your words are right .

ACT.437 - Kiss Goodbye.

i had no plans after my exams , was just practically at home doing nothing . but i managed to catch the movie Ting Xian lent me , Be with You . it's nice =)

I got real bored , so i asked my buddies to go for cycling . haha , it was fun ! from yishun to jalan kayu , yio chu kang road , lentor , and back home =) actually wanted mandai road at the last part , but we were afraid we can't catch the World cup . haha .

germany VS costa rica . GERMANY , my fav team . =) but seems like they won't make it this time . sigh . a wait of 4 years .

and yes , DRAGONBOAT STARTS TODAY ! =)

faithful to one . to each other ? questionable.

ACT.436 - what's left of me.

it's been a long time . i'm getting tired . i got out of this complex , got on track , and i am pulled into something nasty called love again.

my life's been going in circles , i dun know what i want anymore.

i'm just drifting on the tides of fate .

i'm the poster boy for forever singlehood.

ACT.435 - for you i will.

you always want something you can't have . but i gotta try . for you i will. - teddy geiger .

wah , i love this song sia . haha . young kid at 17 , so envious . sigh , why don't i have a talent like clay aiken . hahahaha .

best models of the world ended already . haha . FINALLY . i won nothing . but knew a whole bunch of cool people . =)

the attire i wore was supposed to cost like bout 1000 bucks ? which is so incredible ? jap imported goods .

an intial d limited ed shirt , i believe , a hello kitty jeans for guys , lol, [ it doesn't look gay , pls ] and a bracelet and necklace .

and i got the initial d shirt ! I LOVE IT . =)

talk about initial d .. i haven't watched the latest episodes . haha ,and i haven seen rx-7 for a while . ARRRGGGGHH . i still couldn't forget the moment i saw it on valentine's day .

haha , for now , left 2 papers , freaking study manx .

ACT.434 - stand by you.

get over it ... and lead your life like how you should . being happy.

ACT.433 - if only life is simple.

1 down . 4 to go .

so much to do . no time to rest . sigh .

actually , i really wanted to go for the overseas attachment . but on the other side , i can't bear to leave the team . or not row for Regatta in december .

I needed time off this damned place . i wanted to be alone for a while .

oh crap , one week without training , and i FEEL WEIRD . haha . get over this darn exam manx. june race , so what's it gonna be ?

and i've been having nightmares that are so indifferent from the ones i have had in the past . haha , i guess i have watched too much Demonic / Satanic Movies of late . haha . Gotta switch to watching some decent love story .

to my classmates , this is the last common test . GET OUT OF LEM SOON MANX . =)

love me.

ACT.432 - f.e.a.r.

you have just awakened that deep fear in me . and i can't help but think .

are you what i see ?

ACT.431 - fly me away from here , rx-7 .

common test in 2 days . oh great , i have that freaking modelling competition in momo . sigh , how can i handle it .

i know i can do well for this exam ... but with such an unavoidable obstacle in front of me , like how ?

sigh , what have i done to myself .

i miss you so . rx-7.

ACT.430 - one chance.

tell me it's for serious now . cause i am . i just need one chance .

rockin' my world.

Friday, June 30, 2006

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Monday, June 26, 2006

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Monday, June 19, 2006

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Friday, June 16, 2006

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Monday, June 12, 2006

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Monday, June 05, 2006

Sunday, June 04, 2006

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Thursday, June 01, 2006

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