rockin' my world.: October 2005

Sunday, October 30, 2005

ACT.277 - a brand new start .

tomorrow sch's starting .. and first lesson is ... DORIS TAN ! haha ...

and 4 weeks to Regatta . tomorrow i will start intense gym sessions .... tuesday and thursday still have training although public holiday .

hmmm , if u ask me , DB takes up a lot of time isn't it ? i would say yes .. but i were to skip DB for just one day , i don't have anything to do . No one to go out with , no nothing . haha .. so might as well go for DB right ?

school's starting tomorrow . a brand new start . time management is the theme for this semester . i really have to make use of my time ... even for breaks in between lessons . i can't afford to sit down , talk cock , surf net and all that . i really must make use of 100% of my time . cause i have my studies to balance as well .

3.4 was the highest . i must bring it up to at least 3.6 . that's a new goal .

i miss lian hua dang . looking forward to meeting up with them . =)

oh yeah .. my bro just told me .. that Rx-8 is limited edition . they released only bout 5 or 6 in SG ... and that means .. it's ULTRA PRICEY ~! it's gotta be more ex than 100 . MY BRO LOVES ME BEST !!! haha ...

i have no time to think about anything else . not even u .

Saturday, October 29, 2005

ACT.276 - let me go.

i'm tired . really tired . free me from all this misery .

ACT.275 - life's a rollercoaster .

when u take a while to stop by and think ... you realised , that life is a rollercoaster , but you've just gotta ride it .

yeap .. i wasn't spared too .

last day of work . hooray ~! haha ... my colleague asked me .. that same old qn i can't run away again .. you got gf ? haha .. i said no ... and i couldn't explain to him why i don't have one .. cause , this issue can't be based on a logical scale .

to think of it again ... hmmm ... no one ever really did the sweetest thing for me . haha , edwin would always have his stories about wan hua ... then what bout me ? i think it's always me doing stuff out there for people , but not vice versa. that's why my birthdays always seem to be ordinary . oh well .. it was a date i was looking forward all year long. is ben ng that insignificant ?

oh .. heck about those tots . there are just TTM tots .

gf gf gf ... can everyone stop asking me about that ? arrggghhh ..my friends don't get hit with that qn .. and i keep getting hit by it . single for 2 years plus , and HAPPY with that .

anyway ... school's starting soon . time to get all geared up =) school's gonna be different in a whole new level . we shall what happens .

Friday, October 28, 2005

ACT.274 - new man .

school's gonna start , arrrrggghh .. what a way to spend the holidays ! take a look at my eye bags and dark rings . haha .... last day of work , LET's GET IT ON !

really need a little break . Regatta is coming , Penang is coming . actually .. i don have the time to ease a little . oh man ... project gym insanity is starting next week . Let's hope i have the energy to do tutorials after school and gym everyday . haha ..

i haven't do finish my shopping ... ARRRRRHHH !!! my levi's jeans ! my hair , ALL NOT DONE !

how to start sch ??!! think about that 852 i've gotta take to sch everyday , i sian sia ... haha ... and my HP is dying . can't last even for a couple of hrs . i need a new phone !

time flies . now i'm 18 . soon ,i'll be in NS . then i'll get my first job , my first car .. so on and so forth . wahahahahah ...

ok lah , i've gotta go do my stuff , and register for ... BASIC THEORY !

Thursday, October 27, 2005

ACT.273 - my 18th birthday .

reached home at 9.00am . after getting the present from pearlyn and all that .. slept for 3hrs . woke up .... left for dragonboat .

now i'm at home , preparing for work .

haha ... pame asked such a practical qn : " why are u still at home ? " and may anne : " it's ur bd , go out and rock some ass ! "

er .... that's a very good qn . haha ... birthday ? i only celebrated my birthday when i was in sec 4 , with the ncc guys . that's the only time i celebrated birthdays with friends . oh yeah .. last year too , went out with wz , piak , eric , yuan hao , alex to eat .

today not enuf time .. can't register for basic theory . nvm .. there's always a tomorrow . =)

haha .. so in the end .. bro still loves me best ! he reminded pearlyn to hop over to our place to pass to me the present , although he's in camp .

i am tired . i just wanna rest . what a birthday ... i didn't make any wish or anything . besides .. wishes never come true .

haha , so may anne , you're wrong ! the other time u said , maybe at this point of time , i'll have my sweet heart to celebrate with me . i told u ... see see , still the same . wahahaha ... aiya , can celebrate with my bed , i happy liao . =)

happy birthday to me . another year nearer to u , FD .

ACT.272 - when love is all around .

thanks to all for the wishes ... really appreciate it ! haha ... may anne , it was so sweet of u , u never failed to wish me happy birthday every year ... haha , but u do sound a little dead over the phone .. most prob of the sickness you are going thru now , take care k !

haha , now then i realise ... how good it is to LOVE urself ! i don't get any pressies , i don't get much wishes , but i mean .. i'm still feeling good . haha ... and my ultimate bd present to myself .. REGISTER For basic theory today !

haha ... oh man .. i feel so loved ! thanks to you , may anne ~!

it's such a wild journey we went thru , unimaginably WILD , and we made it all thru . looking forward to our friendship ... and yes , i wanna meet dilun , and DI SIAO HIM SOMEDAY !

Pearlyn came over a second again in the morning .. and i expected she's gonna give me a present .. and she presented me with a present , from my brother . it's a .... mazda Rx-8 !!! now i have a problem ... where to put these huge Rx-8 !!

hmmm ... haha ... 18 . another year older . i remembered once , mum told me 18 is the age , she'll let go of me . i will be allowed to have a gf and so on .... haha , but last year , she already sort of okok with it le . but then the things is , haha , u all know lah , no gf . so what's the pt ?

so i'm still planning out my budget ... what to buy . haha ... this is one of the best birthdays ever , not judging on how many people gave me pressies or how many wishes did i recieve . but .. somehow , i really love life right now .

i remembered , 3mths ago , exactly . suddenly , something happened , that even FD meant nothing no more . there's so much to say , but time doesn't permit .

i'll be waiting . my promises , will stand , forever and ever . that's another promise. stay happy .

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

ACT.271 - let's get wild !

went shopping today . and the theme today is ... ZARA !!

i bought one top and one shirt . top costing 16.90 . a coat costing 119 . and the weird thing is .. i don't feel the pinch ! hahaha .. i FEEL GREAT !

i wanted to get another jacket , but it was too thick .. 75 bucks nia sia . wasted ... haha ..

js is worse . he got a pair of dunks 149 , zara top 16.90 , crumpler bag at 90 , board shorts at 85 . lol ... we are MAD !!

getting Levi's 501 , a few more tops , probably another one from zara , jacket from somewhere , hopefully puma or adidas . ain't any designs lately .. lol ... and ... how come when i wanna dye hair .. COLOUR HOUSE IS DOWN ??!! arrrgggghhh .. no need dye hair liao lah ...

i like to ask why ... why is it that Adidas and Puma ladies stuff are so nice , and the guys stuff is so ... normal ? guys don't need to wear nice / stylish clothes is it ? haha ...

birthday tomorrow , and i didn't realise that ~! HUAT ARH !!!

ACT.270 - what a life .

there are many types of people on this earth . People who get stronger after ordeals . people who are forever sad and moaning over this and that about how God defies them .

Well , sad to say , i have friends like that . and a few more years down , STILL like that . move on , guys . Stop being so weak .

i used to be ultra EMO in the past . but not anymore . i used to grumble .. think here think there , why she left me and all this crap , but not anymore . i used to be ... what they call , WEAK .

that was in the past , now i'm 17 , going on 18. Times have changed, things have changed , PEOPLE CHANGE . and you should too .

Stop being so weak forever , cause when you become older , the ordeals and obstacles you face , will be so much harder . And if you continue being so weak ... the impact on you , will be devastating .

so think about it , stop leading that Rotten life .

Love hurts , love sucks . that is all of u losers say . No Boyfriend , cry . Got boyfriend , cry and grumble . then i tell u , u might as well fuck off .

The thing is ... you guys failed to realise how beautiful life is . YES , I CAN TELL U my love life sucks like fuck . I treated my ex-gfs like princesses and i get the " BEST " treatment back . But i mean ... there's gotta be more to life . my Ncc memories ? the happiest moments of my life lies in NCC . my parents ? my brother ? lian hua dang ? all of them make me appreciate life ever more .

Love never sucked , love never tasted bitter . Non - believer of true love ? then continue the way u wanna be . cause my parents are always my motivation .

So then there's another type of people , ALL TALK , NO ACTION . build castles in the air lah ... if not TALK , then never implement all that hard work behind it . arrrggghh , useless pussies i would say.

Stop complaining that God is unfair . the fact is , LIFE IS NEVER fair . then what can you do even when life is never fair ? make the best of everything . Survival of the fittest , understand this phrase well .

one more thing , my social circle lies ard people of age 16 - 20 . so what are our main priorities ? study . not to get ourselves into stupid relationships and get ourselves all sad about it . of course , there are relationships that are very worth to respect . what i'm saying is , if love is OVER , then get on with life , stay focus on that one objective . if dumb love affects ur studies , i think the one who is stupid is you.

you may wanna ask me , why the sudden change in Ng Hong Bin Ben ? i'll tell you why . cause i don't wanna be a fucking loser , working so fucking hard , earning only a fair pay of 2k , struggling with household income and bills , to pay for my kids university education , unable to get my dream car FD .

" Love is fun , but not required . " - WC horoscopes

sorry for all these words in a serious tone , it's just some people , who allow me to ponder quite a bit . =)

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

ACT.269 - the past ain't over with me .

i woke up at 11am on monday . and i'm awake at tuesday 8.35 . and i don feel tired , although i had a tough gym session ytd . WHY ??!! arrrrgggghhh .. haha , hope i can sleep well later . i have lots of trouble sleeping lately .. both in the night and day . =(

everytime my parents come home , they would hear this song , and they will : " OH MY GOD !! this song again ??! " haha , i have been playing this song on repeat for about 2 months . and i ain't stopping ... probably one reason .

mummy's gonna give me 50 bucks for me to celebrate my bd . haha ... i was expecting at promotion to 100 ! but it doesn't matter anyway ... she asked me , what would i like to have for my bd , a celebration or just a simple cake that the family can share ? i say , i want no nothing , just pay for my car license . that's good enuf and well appreciated by me =)

she saw my adidas shoes in ruins .. and offered to pay for a new shoe . i said no .. i just didn't wanna get a new shoe . she offered 100 bucks to get a new shoe as a bd present .. i said no . i JUST didn't wanna get a new shoe . first thing , running shoes are stupidly ex , and i'm lazy to go get one . i just wanna wear this pair of adidas shoes although it's all broken with holes .

Dad gave me the go to drive his vehicle once project. car license is achieved . HOORAY !! to night life !

my parents are wonderful , and thank god for my bro and them . Thank God for all that has happened this year too . you sent 2 guardian angels down for me . i can't explain what they did , but i bet they couldn't explain what they did . But they brought a huge impact to my life .

that moment to remember . short-lived , but everlasting memories . i won't let go . Thank you , for bringing warmth into my life . you are indeed ... an angel.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

ACT.268 - save me . that's a city on fire.

the unbelievable has happened , there's no turning back. intensity and tension rises , red boiled heads we see everywhere. but i don't care right now , we don't have time to lose .

i'll raise my intensity level to the max . beyond my body limits , even if i break down . i don't have anymore time . my preparation is all almost done . i can't think of anything else , not even you .

it was a huge mistake to shrink . now i have even more to catch up . now all that's gonna bring through hell , is my mind .

we have no choice , but to prove ourselves . 24 men , one spirit , one fire .

motivate me , FD .

ACT.267 - that spirit within.

dragonboat training is tiring today . we went to eat and hang ard orchard after training ... i bought my rotary engine keychain !! hahaha... i'm so happy! it's the last one somemore ... =) this keychain shall belong to my first pair of car keys .

we went around and look at clothes , i'm getting 2 pair of Levi's jeans . and ZARA CLOTHES ROCK OK !! i also one jacket , CHEAP ! and 2 tops ... 29.9 and 16.90 ... CHEAP !!! but i just bought supplements and i ain't got no CASH !! arrrggghhh .. it's that jacket i don wanna miss out .. it's not bad looking and so cheap !

i'm on the spending MOOD . i can't wait for school to start ... then i shall start my gym frenzy , start my clothes frenzy , and start my studying frenzy ! hahahaha ...

regatta in 4 weeks time . floor that pedal , guys .

ACT.266 - promises that stand , forever .

i just went out with derrick and andy . these crazy pair . we updated .. yesh , andy is once again attached almost right after he broke up . derrick is struggling a little with his As . me ? i'm struggling with my life right now .

Andy asked me : " oei , hb , got gf anot ? " i say no.... and he say : " don't bluff lah ... " lol .

haha , they tried they figure out why i'm single , but they can't . haha .. anyway , this kind of things , you've gotta wait . doesn't mean , being attached means you will be happy anyway .

i have no time for anything else right now . Regatta is in 4 weeks time , and here i am , struggling . i'm not at my peak , seriously . first , i've so awefully weak , next ... all my techniques are all messed up . if i shrunk , i can accept that . but why are my techniques messed up ? i don't get it ... i came for every training .
the only reason i could came up with ... is that i have distractions in the mind . i don't know ...

But , i have no time to lose , and i must really get back on track . studies , dragonboat , gym , sleep , eat , driving lessons ... will be all my life comprises of . No social life ? not really ... but i'm happy anyway .

haha , with such great friends , what do i have to ask for ?

life's been such a rollercoaster . i don't know where i was heading . but right now , i know . and i can't lose track once again .

Saturday, October 22, 2005

ACT.265 - the days when we were young .

just went to the doc's with mum , mum's so persistent to tag along :S . so i'm fine .. =) i hope . just some regular eye problem .

hmmm ,she asked me bout some stuff , i just told her , i wanna study . that's all to my mind . to be frank , i don't know since when ng hong bin , can ever say this . lol , it's insane , for such a guy like me ! it's like ... i hated studying ever since i was borned , i only loved school and studying in p6.

but when i was studying for the O's , i kept doing maths . esp Paper 1 . i had dozens of past year exams from prestigious schools , and i just kept doing and doing. i loved the feeling , cause everytime i finished one paper , i just want more . haha .. i'm mad .

right now , this is me . One chance , in one life time . it's now or never . i can never resume my primary school PSLE , O levels , or my diploma . i can't waste this opportunity . it's about 6.6k my parents are paying , and i'm not gonna waste their effort . haha ... finally , at the time when i'm gonna become 18 , i understand what hardship they went thru . Mum doing that stupid production operator shit for 20 years , Dad driving and doing construction work in the past , for 20 years as well . well .... all that SUCK ! haha .. and their 2 son's education is such a burden ...

haha , arrrrggghhh , working in the night sure suck . sunshine upon ur eyes , u can't sleep .

and haha .. i told mum one more thing , love is trouble . love is a waste of my time . lol .. i bet she didn't know how to react .. but she just said concentrating on my studies is good ... haha , you've got what u want from ur kid , after 14years of education .

oh yeah , here goes my budget for spending my entire salary of 1.2k !

pariss buffet = 120 [ spent liao ]
mass factor = 80 bucks . [ spent liao ]
GNC Mega Men's mulitvitamin = 40 bucks .
Creatine Cell-tech = 97 bucks .
Protein = 70 bucks .

Bag = below 80 .
new phone with 2GB memory card and extra batt = still considering .
mp3 player = still considering.
Clothes +2 pair of Levis . = rest of my salary .

1.2 - 410 = 790 left for bag and clothes .

current theme : SPEND !! JUST SPEND !! woo hoo !!

Friday, October 21, 2005

ACT.264 - forever memories.

my eyes are once again swollen and red . red to the extend , no one can imagine . haha , i'm supposed to go out with owen and db guys for fish and co. but .. can't make it . i don wanna scare everyone on orchard road .

this time , it's a little different . there's pain in the right eyeball . nope , not the swollen whatever that is causing the pain . maybe some vein has broken , i don't know . if it gets worse , i must really go seek help . hope everything's gonna be fine =) besides , that miracle eyedrop i believe .. causing blindless over long period of time . i'm off the doc's tomorrow .

haha , i'm so full of problems . whoever's gonna be my wife , my employer ... haha , will suffer !

i just finished watching A Moment to Remember . simply touching and nice . Everything was so beautiful and it all came crashing down . it was like as if in korean shows , God never allows beautiful love stories with good endings . haha , but i give it a 4 out of 5 . and a show that would get 5 out of 5 is .. lord of the rings !

shit , thanks to this red eyeball , i can't go work .... arrrrgggghhh !!

if tml can't go training ... i'll kill myself !

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

ACT.263 - a beautiful love story .

just started watching A Moment to remember ... haven't watched finished though .. gotta go work ... but , it's such a sweet love story ~! but u know .. korean shows seldom end happy , so i'm expecting a twist in the end to all that happiness . and i can already see what's coming .

it reminded me of the memories i had . sweet . and they seem everlasting , they might come with sad endings but ... i'll hold these memories dear to my heart . =) cause what's meant to be , is meant to be , i mean ... let's not call the endings sad .

haha .. life's beautiful , life's great .

Regatta in 5 weeks . to think of it .. i have 5 weeks to get fitter , and weight reduction . hmm ... i must really make use of time . i can't improve cause i'm working stupid overtime . my body is messed up now . so that means , i have 3 weeks , not 2 .

haha ... and i'm aiming at a new phone ..... motorola A1000 !! wah .. but very expensive sia .. but , it just rocks ! must spend my salary wisely .. plan out budget ... =)

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

ACT.262 - happiness .

hmmm , there's quite a few stuff i wanna say .

i have decided , not to go overseas university , cause i just can't fork out the cash myself without using my parents' cash . since bro gave the reminder that i shld never use their assets... i shall abide with it .

and yeah , u can never see me at NUS or NTU . i'm not of that caliber ... at least a SMU . and i'm gonna do a double degree , that's for sure . =)

well , i indeed envy those professionals of prestigious degrees , or majors in universities .. really . i know , i can't reach that level . i know .. i'm not smart . i'm really not .

But the fact that i'm not smart , doesn't give me or anyone out there the excuse of not working hard . Cause with that fact in mind , i wanna tell myself at the end of the day ... yes , i have did my best . i can only go this far , this is my peak . Then i'll give in to reality .

There's where motivation and determination plays a huge part. really they do . There's one thing called , building castles in the air . And that's what a lot of students are doing . claiming they will get a big apartment next time , 5Cs and shit . But they don't know what past the professionals who actually own these stuff , what they went thru . they went thru pure hard work .

Motivation . my motivation comes from u , FD .

I think if there was a God , god really planned it all . i did badly for my secondary sch , got into the worst class [ combined science ] , get bad grades for O's . But u see , if i scored better , i would enter Aeronautical eng . and that course wouldn't let me discover my personal potential . Logistics was actually the right choice , and i can't stop loving it everyday .

So i was building castles in the air in the past . All that talk about Automotive degree , Pro racer . it can't happen . First thing i know bout myself , i'm not good at mechanics . Never i was . i have zero talent in that field . i must admit ... it's such a pity when i love cars so much .

i have changed ... so much within this semester . so much .. until it becomes scary . like how i always described Technology , i always call technology scary .
i just wanna work hard ... as mum has said b4 , she wanna see the world . with dad of course . even if i'm a guy who never earn up to 5 digits , i'm gonna try my best .

Learning is a life issue . it's never too late to learn , it's never too late to turn over a new leaf . Learn as we grow , take obstacles as motivation . Not to let them over run you . But become stronger , not weaker . Learn to swallow ur pride , cause it frequently gets in your way .

one by one , my friends are gonna leave me . first gi kian , next jia en . best of luck .

and i pray for one friend , who chose that wrong path . i have done my best to reach out for u , but if u want to choose to learn things the hard way , it's your choice . but i hope at the end of the day , you will wake up ... from that fantasy world . this world is travelling at a fast pace , none can imagine . and if u slow down .. you will never catch up . remember , time is heartless , it never waits .

Monday, October 17, 2005

ACT.261 - you're my all . rx-7

i have watched project D. repeatedly for a dozen times , apparently .. i'm still not sick of it . maybe ... cause it rocks !!

haha , still brainstorming on what new phone to get .. E680i or 3230 ? or something new ? wanna get a PDA .. or just some phone with good task organizer ... i don't really like the touch interface of PDA .. cause it's sickening to sms . E680i is cheap and can view office documents ... arrrgggghhh !! why did my GD88 died on me ... haha ...

going to the gym right now ... woo hoo !! i dont know why i'm looking forward to gym sessions . gonna go get a pullup bar in my room =) provided my parents allow , cause the HOUSE stuff ... they will bother one . anything else , nope . besides .. can serve my bro lei ...

i'll be a different man when sch starts . i have 2 more weeks to play with ... cherish !

Saturday, October 15, 2005

ACT.260 - moved on.

i woke up and ... my right eyeball is swollen to the extend i can barely open them .. and to the extend , my miracle red eye drop can't work ... so i have no choice , but not to go training . ARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHH !!!! =(

oh well , anyway , my workplace at jurong is great . what i've realised is this . when everybody reports for work ... they dreaded work . they think work sucks . but whether work can be enjoyable , it's up to u . it's bout u and ur colleagues . learnt this on the net when i was doing marketing project . it's a very very valuable educational issue . i'll keep it in mind .

haha , i got so used to riding on the Pellet jack [ some thingy to carry stuff ] , like a kickscotter .. and everywhere i go , i'll be like ... if only here can have pellet jack ... LOL . haha ,,,

i wonder how's my classmates . haha , it seems like the holidays , i get more busy than ever .. so it's hard for them to meet me even more . then when sch start .. i'm back ! i've got a bad timetable as well ... arrrgggghhh !

and suddenly , everyone is having teeth problems ... may anne , wen zhong , alex ... lol... wisdom teeth somemore ...

i'm back to sleep . i don wanna be bored doing nth , cause i am not at training !

Friday, October 14, 2005

ACT.259 - one man standing .

i just wanna be alone for now . i just wanna be with lian hua dang and gi kian right now . i just miss them a lot . derrick and gang .

as i was working , my mind went wild . i started thinking ... and thinking . and did soul searching . suddenly .... i was l o s t . oh well ... the only people who really can make me feel at home .. are the guys i mentioned above .

quoted from jun wei : " i can give u up , but not my paddle ... " haha , although it's so " WHAT THE HELL " but .. think about it ... it's true .

Tired from training ,from work . haha , i don't even get to see my parents everyday now ... and .. i don't know why .. they let me go this time . they are starting to see .. the fact that ... their boy has to go . one day . i'll be gone one day . very soon . haha , but if i'm lucky , i get to settle down for a local Uni .

and by the way , guys who listened in that day , i wished u guys respected me more when i was talking bout that issue . as requested from jun wei , i said it all out is for him . and to think that u guys can make some stuff into a laughing matter ... i don't know what to say . yes , i've cried , over it . cause it was heartbreaking . and the fact why i didn't want to talk about it all these while , cause i didn't wanna recall . i didnt' wanna go back into the past.

sigh . i'm gonna leave it all behind . from michelle's nick : " my heart can't possibly break , when it wasn't whole to start with . "

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

ACT.258 - enduring .

seriously , i can quit if i want to . i mean my job . it's really torturing me . causes fatigue ... and the worse thing is .. when i reach home in the morning ... like 8 plus , i can only sleep til 3 or 4 . that's the max . and that sucks ! i wanna sleep more . haha ..

my new comer colleague happens to see me b4 in yishun bball courts i think . and he finds me familiar maybe bcos of my bro or whatever ... but the fact that he is in NTU , i'm kinda of jealous . i tell myself ... HELL i must get myself into a university. haha ...

i haven't met up with any of my friends except DB humans lately . Lian Hua Dang and my classmates . i hope this shit ends [ work and training ] but i don wish to start the semester as well .. although we all might think , studying is better . haha ... but at the end of the day , what motivates us is .... 1.25K BUCKS !!!

haha , and Edwin better stop talking bout how good wan hua is , everyday ! or what he'll be doing with wan hua later .... ARRRGGGGHH !! U DRIVE ME MAD !!

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

ACT.257 - a battle against time .

Regatta . november . i only have 1 mth plus to play with . and within that one mth , i have to get stronger . i have no time to lose .

the guys have been always talking about it . if any team were to beat NJC , it would be us . we'll crush NJC in regatta .

Thanks Qijia , it was really great having u behind me . haha , July Race u were there too ! Sava as well . =) we'll do better for Regatta this time , no more 3rd k !!

anyway ... i was so tired in work ytd . cause i woke up at 11am . then go gym , financial planning ... then go home slack a while , then work . i was too tired . even my line leader saw . sian ...

haha , but i woke up today at 430 , and found out that ..my bro's gf actually bought me lunch , when actually i REALLY NEEDED LUNCH !! is this for real ? haha .. thanks anyway ..

oh man .. i'm off for gym =)

Sunday, October 09, 2005

ACT.256 - a moment to remember . my poly days.

this mark the ends of Sava sprint . i rowed in Mixed team only today .

There were 2 teams down for Mixed . i was in team b . Team b made it to Semi finals , but team A didn't . Ah huat said he's gonna call in a very strong team in for the Repecharge for team A . [ last chance to go Semi - finals . ]

I had that fear in me . we were up against Commandos . from the start , we locked them there , they couldn't get us off their tail ,the 2 teams were flying high . and it was so intense ... i kept shouting : " lock it ! lock the stroke rate ! " and when ah huat called for : " UP 10 ! READY FOR CHARGING !!!! " and i really whacked . and we crushed the commandos . it was almost impossible . but we did it .

Then came Semi Finals . i was back to team B . Up against ngee ann team A , safra , Pairos [ Philipines international team ] , and Nexus works [ national Canoeing federation ] . judging from what i saw , i told jian sheng ... we just gotta keep on tail of Nexus . even if we lose to them , it's ok .

Right from the beginning , Pairos and Nexus pulled a boat away . and til the middle ... they were more than a boat away . and i asked myself .... : " is this the end ? " i wanted to give up so much ... but i kept going . i kept my cool . i told myself : " this is not the end ... "

we lost . so we entered plate finals . and we got first .

Only ngee ann dragonboat team can give me this adrenline feeling . esp the intensity during charging ... i can't describe . and this is really where i wanna be .

The men's lost . the Men's team were all strong , NTU , NUS , Commandos , Pairos , pacific west , Nexus . it's really hard ...

but we promised to return during River Regatta in november . i remembered that promise to Ryan ... National Champion . we can .

right now , it's all gonna be dragonboat , gym [ gearing up for regatta ] and studies .

thank you Ngee Ann Dragonboat team . if i were to quit bcos somebody asked me to do so .... it would be the biggest mistake ever in my life . really .

Saturday, October 08, 2005

ACT.255 - but why ?

Sava sprint day 1 . - only 200m race , participating in Mixed and Men's open team .

Mixed was tough . very . we made it 3rd anyway .

but Men's was even tougher . we did our best , but we still got last for semi-finals . all the timings came in within that second , so we all lost by split seconds .

then came the Men's plate final [ finals for the 4th , 5th 6th in semis ] we got 2nd . we lost to the commandos ... but in the end , we went home empty handed . there was no medal for plate final 2nd or 3rd . we all were disappointed and sad .

We entered a race , we changed our strategies to strategies we had never done b4 in a race . but ... the Teams that won us ... was just too strong . Philipines and Pacific West . Ah Huat said , they was just too strong , above our class . but i can't have that . i don't really agree . but they are people who rowed for at 5 or even 10 years .. i don't know . but .... the guys really tried our best . but still ...

the guys gymed like crap everyday . life's unfair ....

tomorrow , is 500m at bedok reservoir . it's gonna be a real tough battle . everyone is saying like , it's our best category . i don't agree , it's gonna be tougher . much tougher .

hai . i did my best . i gave all i could.

Friday, October 07, 2005

ACT. - now or never .

Logistics Comm - B
Inventory Management - A
Priniciples of Marketing - B
Biz Ettiquette - B+
TV beyond entertainment - A
quantative Logistics Analysis - B+
Supply chain management - B+

GPA 3.4 .

it's not enough . and i haven't worked hard enough . i saw my results , i was happy for an instant . and next ... i felt fucked up . cause it's not enough . it's PATHETIC .

to me : you better work harder , and allow no distractions this time . nothing shall ruin anything , no one , no nothing . if u can have 8 hrs sleep per day , think again .

ACT.254 - but if i let u go .

sava sprint tomorrow . do my best tomorrow .

i've got real busy with stuff lately . work , training and so on . but sometimes , i stop in my path , and start to wonder .

i shall erase the memories , one by one . like how i did the other time . and i can do it .

braving through it all . i have succeeded . it's a surprise , and simply amazing , over how much i have grown in these 2 years . stronger , much stronger . haha, a while back , i was happily in sec 4 playing basketball everyday . then a while back , i was having my NCC hectic life in sec 3 .sec 2 blah blah blah .. and sec 1 in playstation world .

i can't believe years have passed so quickly . Love came and love went . i was dumped and someone new came . And as we move on , more friends who really appreciated me came by . and next up , God placed the biggest crap in front of me . Whatever comes next , i could fight them easily .

But he planned it .... that i'll change into who i am today . a man who loves a fast-paced world and a society full of challenges . to somebody who doesn't wanna reject work . and i really can't believe i have turned into a workaholic . it's crazy . but it changed my heart into one of zero degrees .

anyway ... i love my results and i want more . hope my short tempered ness go away soon . =)

Thursday, October 06, 2005

ACT.253 - When God defies u .

this is gonna be a long entry . i was enthu bout work on monday ... and when i started work , everything started to cock up , REALLY BAD . no idea why , but it's the luck issue . and i was so demoralised , telling myself : " why can't i do such a simple thing . " i don't know anyway ...

but work ytd was GOOD !! haha , my partner [ senior ] , said i have finally woke up .. haha , now i know how to do liao K !! but i am tired ... it's really tiring .

anyway , the factory is doing on HP products . and i have just done the Supply Chain Management project on HP . it's like .... it's a blessing ? er .. or how shld i call it ? i got to learn more .

And ... Somebody wanted to whack Jian Sheng ytd . hmm , stupid story , i wouldn't say . But , if he wanted to whack him , i'll knock him down straight . besides , i wouldn't need to worry .... cause Js can deal with the 2 of them himself . and besides , he's stupid . we've got 5 , he has only 2 . and look at how thin u are . stupidity . but i'm glad nth happened ytd , cause if we were to engage , it would be real bad , security was near the spot ... police will be called in real fast .

i got MY RESULTS BACK K !! i've got a 3.4 !!! hahaahhahahahhahahahaha , but why is my MARKETING B ONLY ??!!! the project ... i have put in so so so so so much effort , made it into so professional . kao , this is stupid when u get stupid teammates.

3.4 .... not enough . i'm gonna push it to 3.6 at least . next sem will be the toughest of all ... when Dragonboat , gym , studies , projects will occupy my entire life . i have no time for anything else .

Sava sprint on Saturday and Sunday at bedok reservoir . i am so no comment about it ... i just hope .. we'll be at peak point .

initial D stage 4 has come to an end . keisuke's FD is repaired and ... er... i wouldn't say it looked nicer . it looked .. kinda weird even though with the Big wings and body . lol .... but who cares .. cause it's a RX-7 ... =)

haha , when i got my results , the first thing i did was call Mum and Dad . next call Da jie .... haha . i gotta go ... training !!

Monday, October 03, 2005

ACT.252 - just you and me , fd .

i'm trying my best .... to catch up . but i fall behind .... everyone's so pumped up . and i'm like .... not anywhere near .

i spent my day in the gym today . wanted to cut hair ... but , there wasn't enuf time . haha , still need to go back home get $$$$ . so din bother le ... cut on FRIDAY . woo hoo ...

Sava Sprint is on Saturday and Sunday . i wonder ... where we'll stand against these internation teams ? i just gotta try my best ... stay focused . i can't afford to let my thoughts wander anywhere else .

this will be a very hard time for me , from right now , until the end of the year . 3 races , never ending and harsh training . to cope with studies , i'll enter a whole new level of pressure handling . i'll appreciate this chance . =)

haha , FD is getting me crazy !! although the fuel consumption is crazy , i'm so bent on getting it ! 65 K nia !! where to get such a deal ??!!!

results coming out on thursday . is it arh ? whatever it is ... God , please bless me . i know i haven't worked hard enough . i'll push myself over the limit next sem . beyond my personal limits .

Sunday, October 02, 2005

ACT.251 - meant to be .

am i a workaholic ? today have training , and i kinda feel weird cause i'm not working . maybe i don't get to see my buddy edwin ... but . i just feel so SIAN for today.

kristie mentioned something about my social life . hmmmm ... i do agree , life shldn't be only about Dragonboat , work , sleep , eat , studies . in fact ... that's a pathetic life . but , this is the life i'm leading . i don't have social groups that love to hang out and talk during coffee or hang out at pubs .

i don't have friends that love to shop , or have dinner at Cafe cartel and so on . and sad to say , my social group is only made up of guys . never in my life , they involved girls .

i wanna enjoy my young days too . but apparently , i'm not making use of it . oh well .. bu i do love life . =) that's for sure ! i love work too . now that it's holidays , i'm so bored .

i take a look back . and i feel so foolish for the 18 years of my life . bcos of these past 6 years .

ACT.250 - hen xiang ni.

i miss you very much.
do you hear me ?
the only tough time , i can't get through. i can't figure out.
and when the past doesn't wanna pass .

no matter how many people i see , i meet .
i ended up sighing.

they ain't you .

cause i only wanna love you .

Saturday, October 01, 2005

249 - there you'll be.

celebrated mum's bd by going Pariss eat today . Bro bought her a pressie , his gf and me also shared , it was totally cool . some cuff with diamonds on it .

Pariss ... although have all the abalone and all that , .. hmm .. i'm think they don't taste that Great anyway ... 45 bucks per person sia . never gonna eat this again .

had training today ... oh crap , i can't last . i doubt it's the reason i worked overnight ytd . but i think .... it's bcos ... i'm weak . seriously . maybe in the past i could . but now ... i must really dig out time and energy to train . with my work taking up my time , i have barely enuf sleep .

haha , i think about it ...darn , my brother have ... 3 gfs le in like 2 years , and me ... still nothing ? haha , pearlyn [ his current gf , which is also my sec sch mate , and thanks to me , my bro knows her ] i bet she sometimes wonder and asks my bro ... how come ur bro doesn't have a gf ? or is that he don like girls ? haha ..

haha .. but anyway , if what is meant to be urs , it will come . u can't POINT a knife at God and demand for a baby chick to come into ur life right ? haha .. i'm talkin nonsense ...

rx-7 . miss ya !!!! !! !! !! !! !! !!!!

rockin' my world.