Sunday, January 30, 2005

ACT.19 - Misunderstandings =(

Piak - Hey i'm sorry .. i was kidding .. i ain't serious bout what i said .
yes yes , i know u were kidding ... and i was kidding as well .. so don take it to heart all right ?

I just watched finish The Apprentice .. The tables turned so quickly .. and in the end Bradford got fired ... Donald Trump is sure a very smart and powerful leader .. he knows what to do .

Oh manx .. why me so interested in such business stuff ?? jia lat liao lah .. don tell me i'm supposed to be in business when i'm in logistics ! haha ...

Bradford from Apprentice has quite some similarities . He is GOOD , but sometimes , or most of the times , he talk or does thing without things processed in his big head . that causes him his death . haha .. so wasted .. but seeing him in the show also irritating lah .. bad team player .

it's time i make some turning points in my life .. been thinking bout some stuff lately .. haha .. i guess i'll head on with it .

Been a little sick since morning ... having a running nose for the whole day .. ain't feeling good ... just hope tomorrow will feel better .

Saturday, January 29, 2005

ACT.18 - Fly Me up To Where You Are

muhaha .. today happy day for me ... my clan won the match ! muhaha ... thrashed !!! thought we were going to lose when things looked really bad for the first 15 mins .. but then after that we kicked some serious butt ! =o.0= operation zero rocks !

So i spent the whole day at home today ... haha .. nv go gym , just study a little .. haiz , die liao lah ... haha ... i haven't study finish !

Then that bodoh alex msg me , 7th feb that time he intro me that girl birthday .. haha , like what am i supposed to do ? haha ... somemore 7th feb so so close liao , give me such a tight deadline .. And somemore wu yan wu gu give people pressie when u don even know them .. kinda weird though .

Anyway , see how how bah .. haha .. Wan Hua told me that girl very pretty .. haha , ya lohx , i don't get it why alex and wen zhong keep telling me , ahemx , is better lohx .. lol ..

Anyway , i'm gonna rush ECONS tomorrow .. common test , gone in 5 days ! 5 days sure very fast one .. muhaha ...

oh yeah , i went to collect my Mazda shirt from the Mazda club people .. and i went to Yishun Seletar there with bicycle .. then i approached the guy in charge to get the shirt .. and his friends were like " BICYCLE ????!!! hahahhahahahhaha "

i knew this would happen , people come with cars , not bicycle ! they made me felt like a fool , but one day , i'm gonna prove them wrong . YOU GUYS ARE JUST HAVING PATHETIC 323s OK !! i'm gonna own a rx-7 of any gen , one day . then let's see who's laughing at who . The kid they are looking at ain't any kid dudes .

haha , and PIAK !! Stop asking me whether i miss u anot ... buay PAI SEI LEI !! people off light , off tv liao , then HP ring ... " from piak : miss me anot ? " oh my .... i can never go to sleep every nite sia .. muhahaha .... spoil my sleep and day ... haha ..

anyway , today is a good day ! may the sun shine brighter for me !

Thursday, January 27, 2005

ACT.17 - Too Much Heaven .

Well , had a pretty nice day today ... let's start off with me waking up late , when i'm supposed to meet Wen zhong at 11a.m and it is already 11.am !!

Then I got Alex's msg , bout the girl he's gonna intro me , and he say she's gonna do project at library , at 11pm , so it was actually perfect timing , and i spoilt it all by waking up late !!! ARRRGGGGHHH !!! LOL !!

Not to disappoint Alex's plans , so i got up and bathe right away and got my hair up and ready ... haha , reached school at 12pm ... so let's talk bout the incident when i alighted off the bus .

my sch there got one zebra crossing ... And there were a whole line of cars waiting to turn while the traffic cleared , so i waited , and decided to just cross the crossing , then i saw a toyota at the 2nd lane closing in , so i hesistated in the middle of that small zebra crossing , afraid that that guy nv see me , then that asshole at the first lane horn me , i didn't care or didn't even react ... and after i crossed the zebra crossing , i really wanted to go back time , point my middle finger at that asshole , and point on the floor , that it IS A ZEBRA CROSSING GOD DAMN U . haha , i'm a guy with no DRIVING Licsense , and u somemore like driving a Toyota Camry , what's up GUY ???

if i was in a bad mood , i probably opened that guy's door and settle it all . haha ... crazy huh ? Open ur eyes wider b4 you horn me , esp MR NG HONG BIN BEN .

ok , so i went over to Canteen 2 to meet the guys up .. haha , ALex tell me they were in canteen a split second ago .. ARRRGGGGHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!! haha .. anyway , who cares ... so just go get my food .. hungry manx ..

then go over to library .. and that alex nv tell me his plans and bring me right over ... WAH LAO !!!!! haha ... anyway , wanna thank him for his help ... at least he bothered to care to help this pathetic soul ;) LOL !!

Yup , she's prettier at real person than on pic ... Alex's gf power lah , in the morning show her the video alex recorded in MAC ... wah , that one really throw face lah ... haha ... first , i'm doing stupid stuff , that's bad enuf , and i'm eating .

ok , so i got to library , and i learnt that martin is having some problem with his gf ... Martin who someone i know , is best with girls , this time is having problem ... i don't get it , somemore this girl seemed to me to be just a simple girl , is one that he can't handle at all ... Looks can decieve huh ?

Then i realised ... actually it's good to be single ! maybe u envy ur buddies when they are having a sweet time with their gfs ... but when the storm comes , it ain't sweet at all .. and the worst is when that storm is a long term one , it really gets tiring and devastating .

So i'm not too sure how to help him , when he's someone who is supposed to be the best of the best . I think , sometimes when she / he is not the one , u just gotta let go .

Besides , she's someone he met in the airport , went up to ask for the no. , it's just a coincidence she lives near him , maybe it was planned not to work out at all ... now u see , why i don trust such ask no. thing liao ... haha ... aiya , actually is excuse , cause not daring enuf to go ask lah . but i did ask b4 once k !

tomorrow gonna meet up with Mazda Club people ... man man , i wanna how are they gonna react , when i drive a bike as my ride , and they have mazda 323s as theirs . i will look like an idiot lohx .

Oh yeah , i bought Squall's Griever ring on Monday .. haha , So i've got 2 rings on my necklace liao .. more unique right ? haha , got the idea from Rinoa's necklace ... haha , not really that Unique of an idea lah ...

I think i can move on with life better le ... at Least i have very good classmates in poly .. i'm very contented with that blessing liao .

Just gotta find a way to forget the past , concentrate on the future , let go what i gotta let go , cause now , my responsibility is to study hard [ adults like to say this right ? ]

at the meantime , plan with my buddies where to go on V day ... muhaha .,


Wednesday, January 26, 2005

ACT.16 +17 [ add on ]- Back at One .

Well , i have all of a sudden felt like i'm back at One . I realised that sometimes , things are just irreversible , once you lost it all , u can't get it back . Same goes for chances , they come one time , and they never come back again .

I really missed the times in secondary school days . i missed the times with andy , derrick and edwin , the ncc dudes especially . Where we would hang out at Changi airport .. play monopoly ... ride on the trolley ... Sprint from one end to the other , even have picnic there ...

If i could turn back time , i would . i wanna start a new life . as a brand new child . i've made many mistakes ... I wanna cherish those times with my ncc pals and buddies ... b4 each of us change into someone else ...

I wanna rescue her b4 everything started . So she doesn't have to go through any pain and suffering . I wanna study hard , make Dad and Mum proud . I wanna hold on to the chances i had tight when i had someone in my heart ..

But life goes on i guess .

14 Feb Valentine's day , guess it'll be another bachelor nite with the guys again ... haha .. PAthetic .

Time sure passes by very quickly . Gotta wake up to reality soon ...

Ytd , bro went missing for a time period ... he didn't bring his hp , or even his keys out ... then it suddenly hit me , if something happens to him , what will happen ?

He is one bro i really love , although sometimes he might treat me very bad , scold me or whack me , he's still my one and only Bro . So i start to imagine the day he'll be gone , i can't picture it .

You can say i'm worried for him yesterday .

Starting to feel that .. i have no one to confide in ... although i have entered poly .. life didn't change ... i've made new friends .. but the fact didn't change .

Are my wounds still there ? must it really take an angel to heal them ? i wanna free myself from the past ...

" No matter how hard i try , i can't catch up ... everyone's ahead .... " FF8 - Rinoa

Sometimes , no matter how hard i try ... things don't work out ...

My lecturer is right , humans have to interact .. they can't live on their own . i can imagine people who lead solitaire lives ...

Well ... i guess tomorrow's gonna be a better day .. Alex got something up for me .. can't wait !







Tuesday, January 25, 2005

ACT. 15 - When the World turns one Round .

So i spent the day at sch today for POA lesson ,although it was a very brief lesson , i have a pretty good idea of what's going on ...

Then went to cut hair .. muhaha , gonna dye hair next round liao ... he was convincing me to dye today .. but ... cannot lah .. mum sure screw me sia ... haha .. But cant' wait ! the colour very styro lei !

Anyway ...so happy with the hair every time he cut for me .. but the only problem is my rough hair and the maintenance ..have to go cut often then can ... if not , have to find a suitable or more expensive hair product for my hair .. yawnx ... my hair can't just use Gatsby stuff ..

Getting a little sick of life .. can't motivate myself to study ....

hmm , but i think i have to someone start the ball rolling .. then can liao .. if not i will never ever study ... i like to describe things in a automotive way . Like , i study like the car engine , once started up , it keeps going and going , once i start studying , i get more excited and more engrossed in studying , Cause getting questions right and gaining more knowledge gives me a satisfaction .

Well , when i get very lonely in life .. i will use Initial d , cars and the Rx-7 as my companions .. like as if they are my friends , they motivate to move on with life and my goal . it sounds silly ... but i not too sure how is that supposed to work as well .

I guessed i got used to being alone . I can shop alone , watch movies alone ... do anything on my own alone . Not bcos i chose to ... but i don have a choice . it feels very sad to watch a movie alone ...

Life is so tough . we have to face emotional, ecomomic , society and individual challenges . I really wonder what are we born for . We are given the gift of life , but it's made in a way that not everyone can appreciate it . Someone hate to be alive , some thinking they are better off to be dead .

it's true , sometimes people tell u that they are there for u , they care . I sometimes totally think that it's all bullshit ... Even after you're dead , after some time , they will forget . Humans take everything for granted on this planet earth .

So my mindset changes . I used to be someone to be so zhuang yi in love , maybe now not anymore . I used to always tell people that i'll be there for them anytime , anywhere ... and i did , but i guess i shldn't even bother bout them . Cause they don even care bout me .

I used to care more for others than myself . I guess i should finally take sometime to care for myself than for others that ain't worth it .

Friday, January 21, 2005

ACT. 14 - Final Stop .

Well , things turned pretty fast again this time ...

This rollercoaster Train ride started more than a year ago .. And i guess it's heading for the final stop soon . Well , i ended my train ride bout half a year back , so now it's your turn . I hope this will be your final stop .

Alighting and boarding this horrific train again and again . You never seem to be able to refrain yourself to entering it again . I guess that's the power of Love as well . No one can be blamed . You can say it's Human Nature . But now it's not too late to get off . Once and for all . As long as you stand firm .

i'm not too sure whether we can be best friends once again , the odds aren't very favourable , but at least i know i'm trying . It's ok if it doesn't work out like last time ... i guess knowing the fact that i have forgiven and forgotten everything in the past , is a consoling factor to you .

Someone came into our lives and messed things up between us . I seriously think it wasn't worth it , and this incident showed both our weaknesses , how possessive i can get , how high i can expect from someone , but i have changed . I got rid of all those bad points . I learnt that i don't own every single soul on this earth . It wasn't his fault , it was everyone's fault .

I'm glad you've changed . For the better .

ACT.13 - We'll See Heaven.

Very peh chek bout da fact that cannot dl anymorre movie or videos ... my initial D 4th Stage !!!! How to watch ???! alamak ... now so exciting then like that .... want to cry liao .. haha ...

Well , so May Anne , you're still with Jeremy eh ? i can't say much and i can't oppose ... well , i hope you know what you're doing , cause it seems to me you ain't . i'm no longer gonna treat u like you're mine or my own , you make decisions for urself . My hand for you will always be there to save you , but it's matter whether u wanna grab it . I won't go the extra mile this time and get into all that shit again . U make your own decision , i shan't interfere . You die , suffer , i can't do anything as well . As i have said , Everyone chose their own path . You did for yourself as well .

You messed things up for 1 or 2 years .. and if u wanna cont. , i have no comments .. well , tink bout it . Make sure that's what u want , told ya , i hope my friends are free from regrets .

Hmm , woke up this morning , had a little tiff with mum ... cause i was just gaming for a while and she expects me to do housework and all that right away ... i sure have no life sia .

Monday = School , Gym
Tuesday = School , Dragonboat . 8a.m occupied til 11.00pm
Wednesday = School , Gym
Thursday =School , Dragonboat .
Friday = School ,Gym
Saturday = Dragonboat
Sunday = Housework and a day doing no shit cause i have no plans .

Man .. what kind of life am i leading ? Even if i have no dragonboat .. that's much worse .

I sort of lost faith in many things . I can't say i have faith in myself in love anymore . I don't have faith in many things ... What's happening to me ?

So am i Still alone ? I may have my buddies ... but are they described as " buddies " inverted ? i wonder if they take me for granted ... i guess i have too many questions . Too much unsaid and undone . Squall Leonhart in Reality ? could be ..

Well , Thinking too much le bah ? maybe .. i guess should be as well . But there must be a reason why i'm thinking this much as well .

At least i've got an answer from myself bout a certain issue . Decided and shan't change it .




Thursday, January 20, 2005

ACT. 12 - Lost in a Fantasy World .

Just changed the skin and stuff ... cool ? haha , actually wanted to Put RE Amemiya Rx-7 as the background .. but can't get it to work .. so just anyhow sub one Initial D , Takumi VS Ryosuke one in ...

Loaded a load of pics right below .. haha , The Satan Rules Pic .. is just for fun .. i was so bo liao in sch that i typed Satan rules in the image search engine and this came up ... haha , i read bout it , it's a guy at his office thingy and his friend pasted this at his door ... haha .. So i decided put this up cause it's kinda comical ... haha , from all the weird pics , i think u guys probably guessed i'm a mad guy with mad friends ...

Hmm , Dragonboat again today ... Open hse as well , didn't see any familar faces .. but i went the recruitment drive Army there to ask bout a Bond / scheme , cause it could bring me extra cash and link me directly to the pilot career .. unfortunately , there ain't any officers Bonds and of course , pilot scheme . So it's out of the question to sign any cause i know , i'm gonna regret it . Yawnx .. life's tough .

Guess what again ? Gonna be lonely on Valentine's day i guess ... Except for hanging out with either my Buddies or my classmates .. A group of guys Dating once again .. haha ... can't believe i'm single for almost 2 years ... haha , just kinda getting used to life being alone ...

Well , the patient search still continues , never giving up ... Maybe this is the time to sort my thoughts and set my career on route .. if not , if my girl comes by , it could affect me instead of help me ... I'm no multitask man . Gotta put all my concentration into what i'm doing and don't let other things distract me ...

But Sad lahx ... never really get to enjoy a day of Valentine's day with my loved one .... Christmas also !! Why my life so like that ... Haha ... Waiting goes on ..

Hmm , i suddenly felt lost this afternoon too ... i don feel like myself . I'm getting more blur in my thinking as well , can't be decisive anymore , can't decide or lead anymore , lost that firmness and discipline in me ... What's wrong ?

When i was ard the sch , these people passed me a brochure on Tsunami .. at first i tot i was tsunami .. then i read it after DB on the way back home ... it was A christian Shit . When i read the Questions they posted " Where was God during the times blah blah blah ... " And some other stuff , i tot they had the same thinking as me .. but their reply to those question were utter bullshit ... Then last page still say , how to become a Christian ....

Man , i'm gonna stick to my Genes man !! u can call me anti christ or whatever it is ... I believe in Myself , and i believe where i am is because i chose to be here , what i did , not bcos of God . And i don't give credit to him cause i done things myself . And i shan't forget these Tragic incidents of pain , suffering and devastation . IF God was here , get him to talk to me . I'd like to know why he creates a world to end it in the end .

Anyway , if u want something or like something , i think you should pursue it and not let it end there . If u like someone , u may wanna get closer to the person and not wait for the skies to turn black or for heaven to feed u . Or If u wanna be a celebrity or something , u don't just stay seated forever in ur life . U stand up and do something bout it , and get yourself a chance or grab one . Moral of the story is : Don't wait for something to happen , make it happen .

Monday, January 17, 2005

ACT.11 - A small boat in the vast ocean.

"We're a small boat in the vast ocean .
When we see someone drowning in the sea , we are unable to save him ...
But if we all follow the stars and our heart . we can find the answer . "
-Searchin' For My Polestar

guess the quote was something like that ? can't rmb ...

The last ep for "Searchin' for my Polestar " ended yesterday ... i missed 2 epsisodes ... ARRRGGHH ! thanks to ren ci last week and one time don't know what ...

It's a really nice show ... i watched last ep ytd and almost teared .... haha .. That shows how nice it is ... i think it will be very worth it to get the Vcd ... haha , but i think kinda waste of money lei ... Contradicting again arh ? but it's a really meaningful show ...

Was bothered by something when i was about to sleep ... i was so so tired .. then when i laid down on my bed ... i can't sleep ! and thoughts keep hitting me , i flipped left and right ... can't sleep .

So switched on my desktop for some music and called May Anne up .. not too sure why , but she was the first that came to my mind . guessed she's the best person i could speak to as well ... haha , unfortunately she has exam tml morning .. can't spend much time , so aft a while , we hung the phone .. so i'm back to my bed , flipping here and there .. So after some great time , i managed to sleep ..

Well , i wanted to sleep .. haha , but that certain issue keeps bothering me ... Heaven doesn't give me a chance when i needed sleep so much ! well , it was something related to my post ytd ...

Anyways , i went shopping after DB and got some real cool shirts and jeans .. woo hoo ... and i ordered a custom made polo tee automotive shirt ... song BO !!!! haha .. really happy bout it ... bout somehow , i didn't have much time to think how to design it , so i realised my idea wasn't very good ... i shall be his regular customer manx ... muhaha ..

Playing bball with my DB mates as well as TX and JX later... i really hope to play bball once again in my life .... really missed it .. i think i'm gonna fix it on sunday every week .. think i really need to play bball ... muhaha ... can slim down somemore ... but really missed it .

Now i have a entirely packed schedule for the week . Monday to fri sch , sat DB , sun house work and bball and gym . i need more time . hai ... if only this guy doesn't need to sleep ... haha , but he's such a piGGGggG!!!

Sunday, January 16, 2005

ACT. 10 - One chance . One life .

Ever Regrettted that in the past you didn't grab a chance tightly ? instead u let it go when it was in ur hand .... Yup , i bet many people encountered this .. In studies , in careers , in dreams , in Relationships , in Life .

Well , i'm thinking bout it now . The chance i have now , shld i just grab it and give it a try ? or should i just let it go like what i planned to do ?

you know , there was a girl who really liked and loved me when i was in sec 1 . Well , she was a nice girl... but wasn't a really pretty girl . and i guess i was a very immature boy back then . So for a year she loved me , and a year i have hurt her .

Guess what's the story now ? She became a very pretty girl right now , and yes ... her character is still as good ... but i guess it's too late to amend mistakes . Besides , i was still a small boy back then . I can't choose character over beauty i guess . But we're still good friends . =)

I always wanted everyone else in the world and myself to avoid regrets ... But can i ? sometimes ... i seem to make real dumb decisions ... yes , MY lian Hua Dang gang will start whining bout my 2nd stead again .... ARRRGGGHHH !!

So this might just be the Test that Heaven is putting me up against ... in a dilemma ... Guess i shld let nature takes its path ... That's the best way when you're stuck right ? haha...

oh Well ... life's unpredictable ...

ACT.9 - Never gonna Leave Your side .

Yawnx .. another boring day ... was thinking of studying micro econs .. but sianx sia .. someother day lah // ;) haha ...

Well , still configuring my desktop ... and i realised , i seriously need a new keyboard !! and more games ... haha , i completed Splinter Cell liao ... and that makes my life boring again ... no new online games lately though ...

Piak told me she just cut short and dyed her hair .. i guess it will be something REALLY surprising on Monday ... to think of it , it's time for me to cut and dye my hair as well ! haha ... must tahan , for my long to grow long ...so more WU Hua ... haha ....

Hmm , still thinking where and what i shld dye ... At Storm [ monsoon ] it's 69.90 plus 19.90 hair cut ... Ex right ? damn ex sia .. but then Ivan help me dye lei .. sure very very nice one ... but so EX !!! Then if i go somewhere else dye , i go back there cut , sure very pai sei and he sure bit pek chek one ... haha ... cause i totally trust my hair with him man ... ARRGGGHHH !! Money again !!! I shall negotiate with him on my next trip .. Say , if i dye , u help me cut for free ??? muhaha ... i think this is a 50:50 probability .. cause he has a GREAT character and personality .. except for the Sissy part of him and his manager ... lol !!

Later go running Long Distance again then gym ... haha ... my life is really very boring lei !! How a way to enjoy Teenage life !!

Haha ... my bro just told me my relative at thailand is pretty rich ... then he told me the details .. then i was like " ask her buy a Rx-7 la ;) "

guess what went thru my mind just now ? Maybe i can develop my Racing career at Thailand ... *evil* ... haha , since a rx-7 and lots of big mods costs peanuts ... haha ..

i gtg ... busy busy with configuring my com ...

Friday, January 14, 2005

ACT.8 - We lost our dreams along the way .

Just came back from KAP mac with my classmates ... well , today sure is a nice day ... i Love Mrs Ng Kay Yi man ..you rock ! haha .. of all people , u scold our "fav" character in the class ... muhaha ...

Well , to answer the girls question .. bout me being childish .. yup , u can say i childish or whatever ... this is me . Ng Hong Bin . At least i present the real me in front of everyone in the world . i don't hide myself . i don't act as a gentleman in front of girls . i will be who i am . There's a serious side of me and a playful side of me .. and as well as a lazy side . so u girls say childish .. say lohx , i don really care much bout what people say of me esp in this sector .

i was reading the newspapers the other day and i happen to read a Air force advertisement . And i went to the website ytd .... and yeah !! i can apply for pilot there !!! at least this raises my chances once again ! i didn't lose my dream in the end ...

Well , since this is revived and NS is coming soon , i shall take a shot at Pilot b4 going for Automotive ... Pilot = big $$$ ... haha , childish ? i have only one reason for choosing this path . And that is family . it's not bcos i wanna earn big bucks to have a good life and drive a sports car in my life .

Tired ... DB was crazy ytd ... haha ,but of course , worth it ... and i just recieved news from pei wen that Wei ling joined Dragonboat !! ARRRGggggggHHHHHhhhh !!!

haha ... well , i can't stop her ... but it was pretty shocking ... Well , i do hope i meet her in the race . And shall show her sch what my team is capable of . i believe this team has a lot of future in it , i'm sure .

gotta go ... Running and gym later ... yawnx ...

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

ACT.8 - Mr . Perfectionist.

Haha , lately discovered something new bout myself .. but it's not supposed to be a good thing lah ...

i want everything to be perfect . esp work . projects have to be perfect . Basketball play have to be perfect , and the worst of all , i expect everyone working with me to be perfect , and when i made mistakes , i didn't blame myself the way i did to my friends ... well , i guess this is a good thing to change bout myself ..

i'm too realistic . i judge people , criticise and gibbering jabbering bout it . think i shld hold back to my comments . No man can be perfect at everything . A man can only be good a certain stuff . ARrrGggh ... gotta drill that into my mind ..

Went to the MDE idol today ... yawnx ... there could be certain improvements .. but i only tot of one . when the singer is singing , maybe u can tone down the lights over at the spectators ? didn't u realise that all idol competition are done this way ?

anyways ... not all were bad singers lah .. only got one ... i think i can sing a hell lot better than him ... haha , no lah . he's not THAT bad lah ... [contradicting myself ? ]

aiya .. whatever it is ... Found a Mazda club website ... so awesome ! there are quite a few Rx-7 owners there ... and they frequently organise meet ups ... and even trips overseas .. and to meet the rides of other region .. and wow ! they are just like the ones u see in motorshows ...

Can't wait to participate in it man .. and have a friend owning a Rx-7 .. muhahaha !!

Monday, January 10, 2005

ACT. 7 - Qian Bu Gou Yong [ Money no Enuf]

Oh man , i just spent my allowance on my desktop .. and now i got nothing left .. actually , not that bad lah .. mum gave me another 10 bucks although i keep refusing ... i can starve , but can my body do without food ? that's the thing , i need energy and all the nutrients to survive .. wanna save $$ also cannot :s

let me list the things i wanna spend on ,

Mx500 Mouse = 49
Barrucuda Mousepad = 32
Keyboard =10-30
Wireless Lan Card = 40-100
Supplement Protein = 80-110
running shoes = 60 - 100
Clothes = Mum Sponsor
Cut hair = 19.90
Dye hair = 20 - 69.90
Contact lenses = 60
[ this one cannot delay lah , my contact lense a few mths old]
Bag = 20-50

Haha , and to rely on 50 bucks a week , for all these stuff ? guess it's time for some saving lessons ... oh man , then if a gf come by at this time .. i sure die arh ! i'll be a broke man , and i mean really broke ! haha , die lahx ..

u see that some items actually don't need one , like dye hair ? haha , i wanna look Better mahx .. more styRo ! haha , i want a bombastic colour this time ;) haha , pai sei lahx , i this person very ugly liao , so need to rely on such stuff to look better .. haha ..

i'm outta here .. tired like mad .. got my desktop today ! 3.0Ghz Sapphire Atlantis 9800 pro blah blah blah ... song sia ! but i feel so guilty .. ARRGGGHHHHHH !!




Sunday, January 09, 2005

ACT.6 - Fly away .

Had a pretty nice day yesterday .. esp the walk with rajif to the bus stop .. was laughing and talking cock totally ..then went to bugis to shop for clothes ... can't find any , but the bugis street was partially closed ... so we are heading there today again ..

Later have to go Ren Ci ... wonder how will it be later ... haha , later i say so much , i never get selected to go up ...

Well , yesterday dragonboat was crazily tiring ... everyone got blisters in their hand .. i was controlling my left hand .. i was very afraid that my left blister will break and bleed .. cause it feels like it's gonna to !

haha , so one of my fingers is handicapped now ...

Hope to find automotive polo tees at the shop at bugis street today .. haha, " shop for new year clothes " mah ... mum sure scold me if i buy more than 1 ... cause it's totally not practical !

i guess that's it for today .. school's tomorrow again .. i need a breather .

Saturday, January 08, 2005

ACT 5. - Tomorrow never dies .

well ..i feel a little better now ...having dragonboat later .. tiredx ..

watched spiderman 1 yesterday night ... learnt quite a few new things from the show though ..

I should cheer up .. maybe tell myself the words i always use to console myself ... Although how rough life can get , i must go on . Until my body fails , that's the day my heart will die . I guess , i can only find the answer further on in my life , not here . So i must live on on the search for my purpose ... to get the reasons why i have such a life .

Tomorrow's gonna be Sunday .. hope to spend some time with Dad and Mum .. recently on pretty good terms with my bro .. that's great .

I guess there's just this empty hole in my heart , i just gotta move on with life to fill it up .. Although heaven may deny me and everything else , i must brave everything that stands in my path , alone it shall be , with buddies it shall be .

People change , and i must know that . I guess i should learn to forgive and forget ...

Well , i believe the wounds in my heart will be healed one day .. i'm sure ... Ming Tian hui gen hao . For the time being , shall concentrate on studies and dragonboat .. nothing else .

Friday, January 07, 2005

ACT.4 - Am i a character on earth just like Squall Leonhart?

as i was on the bus ... a lot of thoughts run thru my mind ...

i realised .. i have material stuff .. love , care and concern from my friends are not so much within my reach .... The only love i get .. is from my family .

i don't know why .. my friends do not cherish time .. i always ask them out .. to spend time together .. is because i cherish them a lot .. and i know .. one of us might be gone anytime .. so the more we should appreciate each other and time together ..

But they don't . They take me for granted ...

i always thought i had the bestest friends on earth ... but .. it guessed i was blinded by a lie ... a lie said by myself ..

i'm not too sure why i have such a rough life ... i guess until now ,i don't know what is my purpose .. am i a experiment by God ? to be played over and over again ? Given such intelligience yet unable to use it ... i'm denied by Heaven again and again . No matter how hard i try .. i never seem to hit his expectations ..

People claim that they cherish and appreciate me ... well , they seem to be lies everytime ... i shan't trust anyone anymore . i know i can't do this .. but everytime i trust someone .. i'm betrayed . i don't get it . Even my bestest friend ...

The only reason why i wanna have a dog ... is because i want a companion . someone who can share my sorrows and joys .. someone who i can talk to at night .. who can spend his life with me ... well , i know i won't last long this lifetime .. but i'm trying my best to make my time worthwhile ...

In my whole life ... my parents .. sibling , teachers and me , were disappointed again and again because of me . i failed to reach to their expectations . But everytime i failed .. my parents were always the ones who believed in me . They tell me as long as i did my best ... it's ok . Life still goes on .. i did my best everytime in everything . But it just doesn't work out . it just doesn't .

everywhere i go .. people look down on me ... studies , basketball ... gaming ... even in love . do i deserve all this for 17 years ? even sometimes my friends look down on me ...

i feel like a boat ... a helpless boat .. in the middle of the sea ... drifting and drifting .. and i can see no shore ..no help around .. and i just wait .. and wait ..

Every obstacle i face .. i face it bravely by myself .. i really wish for a pillar of support .. cause i'll fall one day ..

i'm not sure whether i can walk this journey of life myself .. braving through storms and every battle ... i know , i won't make it .

Hope . Believe . May a miracle fall upon me .

Thursday, January 06, 2005

ACT. 4 - Alamak ! i forget to post new year resolutions !!

haha , i tot it would be interested to put mine as well .. so here we go !

1. BE a hell lot fitter !!
yeah baby , i wanna be very fit and i want bigger biceps , triceps , better back muscles , better figure , have abs , more refined qualtricepts , better ham strings , more refined calf muscles , bigger forearms ! er ... run faster , do at least 20 pull ups blah blah blah ..

2.Make my brain bigger .
Haha , no lahx , it's to study harder and get better grades .. increase my knowledge , on microsoft office ,computers and much more ..

3.Be independent , year of my 18 .
It's time to learn how to save save save ! and learn how to gain more of my parents' trust .. learn to take care of myself more , learn to keep my room tidy lah !! wah lao , my room everyday so messy ... why my bro room so tidy arh ?

4.Learn to be stronger . more mature.
hope to be more mature this year as well .. As more life experiences pass by , got to be stronger and mature .. haha more mature , means i can be a much better bf ! and learn how to help my parents more ...

5.Find the right one .
hmm , for the past 17 years , i haven't learnt how to choose the right girl . gotta learn to see through a person more ... always got tricked by them .. haha .. well , hope this year will be different as well ..

6.Advance my knowledge on automotives .
muhaha , it's time to research more on cars ... didn't have much time to go read up on my mags ... really busy .. but i hope to meet a friend who is very experienced in cars , preferably a car technician or a RACER !! haha ...

7.Become better looking .
haha , i'm a pretty vain guy , ai mei lahx .. i go out arh , must wear til nice nice .. unless i going out with my buddies , then i heck care ... haha , my hair lah ! ma fan lei .. why Heaven don want give me better hair ! then give my brother ! wah kao ! haha , learn how to buy nicer clothes as well ...

8.Lead a better life .
aiya , whatever it is , become a better me ! still on the process on changing .. haha ... shall 2005 rock !

there's another entry below as well ..

ACT. 3 - Swear it again .

" i Wanna know .. whoever told you i was letting go ,
the only joy that i've ever known .
Girl , they were lying .
So you should know this love we share
was never made to die
i'm glad we're on this one way street , just you and i .
I swore to share your joy and your pain ,
And i swear it all over again . all over again . "

This song was out in the year 1999 and it sure was hot ! haha .. it's by Westlife .. really love this song , pretty meaningful too .. and somehow and rather also , i sing Westlife's song best ... if u ask me Clay Aiken or What guy arh .. i sure will die sia ... haha .. well , i don't sing that well anyway ... if not i'll be in SI already ..

So today's another day ... and i came to sch at 10 .. realising that class for econs has been cancelled !! damn Microeconomics man !! i could have slept at home lei .. tired ..

Today's fitness test for dragonboat ... hope there's in improvement ...

Life's been smooth going for a long time .. ever since my poly started ... yawnx , haha , maybe i add another adjective , dead as well . haha , except for my buddies and poly mates that perk my life up ..

haha , it's time to cut my hair as well .. muhaha , no more short hair and black hair ... if i'm not in dragonboat , i sure dye or highlight grey or ash grey .. haha , not those type exaggerating one lahx ...

I have to spend on so much lately .. mouse , mousepad , clothes , bag , shoes , hair , supplements and blah blah ... and i don't wanna take any cash from Mum . This makes my life hard ! haha ... save lohx ..

The good thing being single is .. u have all the money to yourself !!!! muhaha haha .. the other time when i was attached .. i starved and spent none of my allowance just to date on saturday ... haha , that week was pathetic !

Hmm ,allowance may have increased now .. but , my expenses has increased as well ... haha , must learn my brother liao ,everytime bring gf come home watch movie ... haha .. no lah , i won't be like him ... haha .. he's a pathetic guy .. ahem ahem ..

i was very attentive and impressed when my WAA lecturer was teaching .. i had a bad impression of her at the beginning .. but now i really admire . She's a person of intellgience , wisdom , incredible judging skills .. haha , then when my friends ask me next year IS choose what module .. i say , i'll follow wherever she go .. there's a lot a lot to learn from her . haha ...

i think i'll stop here .. just really hope this year will be a meaningful year .. 2005 , kinda not used to it ... well , another year nearer to getting my driving liscense !

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

ACT. 2 - it's time ?

ACT. 2 - it's time ?

i was late for sch today . .but it's ok .. mr Ng being the cool dude , started class after 30mins ... haha , i went to the toilet first to fix myself up first , then as i was on my way out , he came in ... haha , i don wanna give him a idea that i smoke ...

So had a long long day .. yawnx .. rain in the morning .. i slept in the bus for 1 hr plus ... but i guessed it was nt enuf .. my eyes cld barely open even though i wake up ..

then during POA class .. lecturer gave us a break .. then my gang went to sleep right away .. haha , then piak go toilet come back , whack my table ask us to wake up , i woke up , then i pointed her middle finger then went back to sleep ... well , it wasn't intentional ... but when i'm really tired and sleeping , i'll kill anyone who wakes me up.

Reached home .. then went for a run to Seletar reservoir ... was looking out for dogs .. don't want another one to chase me .. then headed for gym with Js and Gk ..

Then we saw a girl we recognized from our previous gym sessions .. this time 2 friends with her ... then while we were at the quatricepts (whatever u spell that ) section , then we were talking crap , then they happened to be nearby , i think it was intentionally nearby , then i shouted " na Bei ! Where got place to set fire !! " lol .. i was crapping .. then they laughed .. and the girl smiled at me .. i was like " ??????????" then i asked my friends , what the heck ! they laugh for ?

haha , then when we were abt to sign out , went to get our stuff , they were also dilly dallying signing out and looking at us ... then i was more curious .. cause during one of my previous sessions , my grp was joking crap again bout her , then she turned and smiled at me ...

Sad to say , she's older than me , bout 18 or 19 at least ... haha !!!

Well ... i'm not too sure bout this .. maybe chances are gonna slip by .. and it's up to me to go grab them ... well ,i've learnt how to grab chances and cherish them well .. this time , no more regrets .

Can't wait for The Apprentice to be aired ... really excited bout it , why ? cause i like to see how people react under pressure , against all odds , people argue , and how things got worked out , and how Donald Trump judge and make his decisions ..he's a very respectable man . i think he can become another of my idols =) A companion for Gandalf , lol !

Hmm , wondering who can fill this empty hole in my heart ... haha , if not my friends will use all the girls in the world and di siao me ... i must put a stop to it ! haha ..

muhaha , this week sat going bugis after DB .. must make sure i rmb to go pray ... it has become a habit that everytime i go bugis , i'll pray .. always prayed for my family ...

haha , i wonder how come , i have so many romantic ideas .. for presents , events , birthdays .. but i can't use them ! always have to share with edwin ... if not he no ideas ..

oh yeah , pray for The tsunami victims as well ... hope for them to recover soon ... Thailand must jia you .. my skin very different from them hoh ? lol ... " never forget ur ancestors .. "

Changed my skin .. self designed .. it doesn't look very nice though .. but this is the best i can do .. i tried my best not to make it look messy le .. haha .. cars are my life !

" You're the meaning in my life , you're the inspiration .
You bring meaning to my life . "














Sunday, January 02, 2005

ACT 1 . - 2005 : A brand new start .

Just came back after 2 days of Tonning .. new year's nite was at Edwin's hse after hanging out with Piak and gang ... then next was Ting Xian's hse .. just came back from there though ..

Haha , not to mention , the Gym is a must for everyday ... pump those muscles !!

Hmm , the initial D flame rekindles in my heart again ! haha ...gonna go play at Jurong point with Andy tomorrow ... Can't wait !

My New computer is ready for collection .. was intending to go collect after Jurong point but Dad don't know say this say that .. say i anxious or nervous .. like what the hell ! i'm only free on Monday lei ! it's not whether i nervous or excited or whta crap .. i don't have the time to run about ! somemore i'm heading Jurong tomorrow , then what the heck is it bout ? haiz ..

Anyways , i have to get on with work also .. hope that Computer can access me better to work ... hmm , i shall brain storm for ideas that the computer can help me .. like photoshop or whatever crap ...

Hmm , i have a gut feeling that this year's gonna be kind of special for me ... not too sure what type of special it is .. but , hope it's for the good ! Study study and study is all that is on my mind ! Automotive Engineering and management !!

When i was at Yishun Ten GV arcade .. there was quite some people at the initial d machines .. yeah , they are better than me at racing there . But i realised something . I'm someone who dares to dream and dare to make it happen , while they are a group of day dreamers . Cause i dare to make Racing my career .

Evil to say that ? haha ... aiya , not all people who play initial d are nice people .. in fact more than half are losers , ah bengs , morons and unfriendly people .. Lose already , fight or scold , or change card .. i'm forever Mazda i guess !

So pissed when Some guy in the forum said Mazda Rx-8 looks like crap .. it's a design car with Future imprinted on it all right ???!!! go stick to Kia cars lah ..

Er ... i nv really done anything on the Ton days ... sleeping ? haha .. played Uno STACKO at Tx's hse ytd .. haha , his sec1 bro was ard .. and we played Uno stacko like as if ... ahem ahem ... So hilarious .. esp when Andy is ard !

and also ... Saw Ryan DB at City hall on new year's eve ... saw him at mrt when i just reached City hall .. and when i took night rider .. saw him again .. with his GF ! haha ... hmm , so his fate has turned ard eh ?

planning to permanently resign from NCC .. i think it's time to concentrate on DB and my studies .. i can't afford to take on any more burdens to take up my time as well ... hmm , was wondering how am i supposed to tell this...

just realised my blog skin not very nice lei .. shld have stuck with the old one lei .. but very sianx sia .. haha , on the search for a new skin ... haha , no more final fantasy ok ! gotta look for something real nice ...

Well , i guess that's it for today .. might wanna go rest now .. my back esp .. if not later i cannot do gym effectively .. happy 2005 guys !