Hello from
my own little corner of the world. I apologize profusely for my lack of
writing. Things have been a little crazy as of late and I just haven't found the
time to write to you all. My great news of the week: Transfer calls came and
went and our phone stayed blessedly silent. So... I get to stay on Jeju for
another transfer! This also means that I have broken my streak of having my
companion dump me every transfer. I'm so excited.
Thanksgiving
was of course this past week and I might have been the only one on this island
who cared. However, all it takes is one enthusiastic celebrant, so it turned
out pretty good. Since I was the sole missionary determined to suffer for
food’s sake I cooked. I made us some stuffing and an apple pie in our little toaster
oven. I may not have previously mentioned that Koreans do not bake as a general
rule, so we do not have ovens. This has been the most difficult cultural
practice that I have had to adapt to. Since my toaster oven could not fit a
turkey we ordered some fried chicken. Anyway, I felt very festive, and it was a
beautiful affair.
As it has
been a time to ponder all that I have to be thankful for, I have been thinking
this past week about the many wonderful things in my life that I am grateful
for. While I have been on my mission I have been daily thinking about the
guidance I receive from my Father in Heaven and how much of a blessing that it
is.
It has been
particularly evident on my mission that we need to look for inspiration and
guidance from our Father in Heaven in order to receive it. In tuning my mind
and soul to the whisperings of the Holy Ghost I have learned something a little
better about how to recognize that guidance, and that is that it doesn't come
without our work. Also, it doesn't always come at the beginning of the path;
sometimes we have to walk a little bit in darkness before the light gets turned
on.
There is a
wonderful quote by Elder Dallin H. Oaks about acting before guidance comes.
It says, "We will get promptings of the Spirit when we have done
everything we can, when we are out in the sun working rather than sitting back
in the shade praying for direction on the first step to take. Revelation comes
when the children of God are on the move." (Ensign Aug. 2013)
There are
many examples of this direction in the scriptures, but I found one in
particular especially meaningful to me right now. In Ether, when the brother of
Jared prays to receive guidance of where to go the Lord gives him specific
directions of what to do and then instructs him, "And when thou hast done
this thou shalt go at the head of them down into the valley which is northward.
And there will I meet thee." Ether 1:42
The Lord
gave him a task and then promised that after this had been done he would meet
him. After the brother of Jared had done his part and worked on his own. Then
he received the further help.
If you are
like me then sometimes when I am reading the scriptures I think “of course the
Lord is instructing prophets, they are leading nations and peoples, but why
would He care about my issues as they seem so insignificant”. I think one of
the greatest opportunities that my mission has offered me is to travel.
Traveling allows you to recognize how small you really are in a vast world. It
shows you that your troubles are just a drop in God’s overflowing bucket of
troubles–so many of which are proportionally greater than my own. If I can quote
Oscar Hammerstein, “In my own little corner in my own little chair”, I know He
still cares about mine. I have received comfort, knowledge beyond my own
capacity, and inspiration to guide my daily life. This I cannot deny. And it
testifies to me that even though I am a drop in an unfathomable pool of need I
am recognized and loved as an individual. As I sit in “my own little corner” of
the world He needs me to seek out my own personal inspiration, because this is
the designated way that I can share my testimony of the Savior, and it is the
way the message of Christ is spread–one drop at a time, to another drop, slowly
filling the sea, and reaching every “little corner”, of someone else’s
testimony.
It is
through our struggles that our testimonies grow. However, in order for them to
grow we have to build them, and in order to build them we have to seek
instruction, and in order to seek instructions we have to study the scriptures
and pray, and it is through searching for divine guidance that we recognize our
blessings, and it is through recognizing our blessings that we become grateful,
and it is through our gratitude that we share the message of the Savior and His
love for us with others…in their “own little corner”.
My greatest
struggle, as I am sitting in my own little Korean chair, has been to learn the
language. It has been a blessing that my companions have all been able to speak
Korean fluently. I do not know what I would do if I had to navigate the
language on my own. I have often thought about the Apostles who went to preach
of Christ to what was considered the ends of the earth at that time. They went
alone and without an interpreter. I have thought how powerful their desire must
have been to spread the news that “He is not dead–but lives!” It puts into
perspective the training and guidance I have received to prepare me to serve in
a foreign land. One major bonus I have is a companion who speaks the native
language. But if my companion were to take care of me all the time, speak for
me, read for me, figure everything out for me, I would never learn the language
for myself. I would never have to struggle to share my testimony, and I would never be required to meet the lord half-way there. When your
words are limited it really makes you think of exactly what you want to say
about the gospel. It forces you to define your testimony. This has been one of
the unforeseen ways that my testimony has grown. This has helped not only in my
personal progression, but it has strengthened my testimony of the Savior. It has shown me that when I do all that I am asked then the Lord will "meet me there" and fill in the gaps. It is
the same in our lives. Sometimes God allows us to struggle and work on our own
so that we can learn and grow. I also know that although we often feel like we
are in our corner–facing the corner–in our chair–feeling a little punished, He will help us turn out and
see that we are part of a room that encloses all of humanity, where each one is
numbered and each of us is counted in His Kingdom ..."and there [He] will meet [us]". I am grateful for the
scriptures and thankful for the opportunity to seek personal revelation, which guides
and directs me in my daily life.
I love you
all and hope that you recognize the love of your Savior in the small things. I wish
you a wonderful holiday season!
Love,
Sister Annie