IMAO Has an “Office of Alternative Employment”: It’s Called Getting Fired

About that Secret Service Agents’ free trip to LGBTQ conference at Disneyworld …
American Thinker | 27 Sep, 2024 | Ed Sherdlu

We are in the middle of a hotly contested presidential election. There have already been two attempted assassinations of Donald Trump.

Reliable sources report Iran has sniper teams here to kill The Donald. So what does the Secret Service do? It sends needed agents to an all-expense paid LGBTQ conference at what Disney calls “The Most Magical Place on Earth.”

The Secret Service leadership finally admitted they did not assign the full complement of agents to Trump’s detail in Butler, Pennsylvania. Only a few were fully trained Protective Detail agents. The rest of the squad came from the B-Team. They usually spend their time chasing counterfeiters and credit card fraudsters. The temps’ protection training was watching a two-hour video. That’s less than a good movie and popcorn.

The Service doesn’t have enough time or manpower to answer even the simplest questions the Congressional Committee asks. USSS leadership claims they don’t have enough money to complete their vital mission. But they have the time, resources, and budget to solicit agents for the free four-day trip to what we Floridians call the Mouse House.

The story went public when the service’s DEI office sent a memo to every assistant director asking them to nominate candidates for this fun-in-the-sun trip

… or fun in the son …

to Orlando.

Susan Crabtree of Real Clear Politics uncovered the details. She learned those assistant directors had to send a list of their preferred people to the Secret Service Office of Alternative Employment.


 

I Thought This Was a Babylon Bee Article

FEMA sends dozens of electric chainsaws to North Carolina town without power.
threadreaderapp.com | October 08, 2024 | M_C_Masters

We are on the mountaintop in Little Switzerland collecting airlifted donations and distributing them to homes that have no power or are inaccessible. The community is self-organizing incredibly well. This is the only federal government response I’ve seen so far. {Image} Almost all the pallets we have received are donations coming in from citizens and orgs. Feds usually don’t come this far up into the mountains.

This has been the government donation: pallets of electric chainsaws to communities that have no power.


 

Religious Corner: This Made Me Reflect Upon Christmas

FrankJ is a very, very Christian man, so here’s a tip of the hat to those who venerate the Christian religions. And to those who don’t, no disrespect. Certainly no vest-bombs.

Luke
 English: Douay-RheimsLatin: Vulgata ClementinaGreek NT: Byzantine/Majority Text (2000)
 Luke 9
42. …επετιμησεν δε ο ιησους τω πνευματι τω ακαθαρτω και ιασατο τον παιδα και απεδωκεν αυτον τω πατρι αυτου
43. And Jesus rebuked the unclean spirit, and cured the boy, and restored him to his father.Et increpavit Jesus spiritum immundum, et sanavit puerum, et reddidit illum patri ejus.εξεπλησσοντο δε παντες επι τη μεγαλειοτητι του θεου παντων δε θαυμαζοντων επι πασιν οις εποιησεν ο ιησους ειπεν προς τους μαθητας αυτου
44. And all were astonished at the mighty power of God. But while all wondered at all the things he did, he said to his disciples: Lay you up in your hearts these words, for it shall come to pass, that the Son of man shall be delivered into the hands of men.Stupebant autem omnes in magnitudine Dei : omnibusque mirantibus in omnibus quæ faciebat, dixit ad discipulos suos : Ponite vos in cordibus vestris sermones istos : Filius enim hominis futurum est ut tradatur in manus hominum.θεσθε υμεις εις τα ωτα υμων τους λογους τουτους ο γαρ υιος του ανθρωπου μελλει παραδιδοσθαι εις χειρας ανθρωπων
45. But they understood not this word; and it was hid from them, so that they perceived it not. And they were afraid to ask him concerning this word.At illi ignorabant verbum istud, et erat velatum ante eos ut non sentirent illud : et timebant eum interrogare de hoc verbo.οι δε ηγνοουν το ρημα τουτο και ην παρακεκαλυμμενον απ αυτων ινα μη αισθωνται αυτο και εφοβουντο ερωτησαι αυτον περι του ρηματος τουτου

I always tend to choke up when I read those words. Would I, myself, have been “afraid to ask him concerning his word”? He would have answered in more riddles or parables, I expect. But He knew what was coming.

Source


 

More About CBS Editing Kamala

Not sure how badly the formatting’s going to come out on this from PJ Media, but:

… But the most damaging part of the interview came when Harris was questioned about her flip-flopping on major policies like fracking and immigration. Instead of directly addressing these changes, she offered evasive answers about traveling the country and listening to people, raising doubts about her consistency.

But the real interview was likely so much worse than what was broadcast. You see, ’60 Minutes’ has been caught editing Kamala Harris’s responses in true Orwellian fashion.

Check out the following exchange that was posted on social media before the interview aired:

KAMALA on ISRAEL: Well, Bill … the work that we have done has resulted in a number of movements in that region by Israel that were very much prompted by or a result of many things including our advocacy for what needs to happen in the region.

WHAT? 😳 pic.twitter.com/7PWQ0JcLAr— Trump War Room (@TrumpWarRoom) October 6, 2024

This was a nonsensical word salad that didn’t make much sense. So ’60 Minutes’ decided to do what passes for journalism these days and literally edited the interview, splicing her response to a different question in place of that monstrosity.

But that’s not the version of the interview that was aired.

Here’s a video showing what transpired in the interview, and then what was actually aired:

Remember Kamala’s word salad answer about Israel on 60 Minutes? It’s gone.

This is what many Americans will now see. pic.twitter.com/H4w7btDv6x— MAZE (@mazemoore) October 8, 2024

Here’s a transcript of the real interview:

BILL WHITAKER: But it seems that Prime Minister Netanyahu is not listening.

KAMALA HARRIS: Well, Bill, the work that we have done has resulted in a number of movements in that region by Israel that were very much prompted by or a result of, many things, including our advocacy for what needs to happen in the region.

Now, here’s a transcript of the broadcasted interview:

BILL WHITAKER:  But it seems that Prime Minister Netanyahu is not listening.

KAMALA HARRIS:  We are not gonna stop pursuing what is necessary for the United States to be clear about where we stand on the need for this war to end.


 

News Babes

I might as well post these here — a photo dump, as it were — since I went to the trouble to download them.

Happy Thursday!

How pretty can you get?

“Oppo, …”

“… now, Oppo …”

Notice how all temperatures increase the closer they get towards her?

“Yeah, we know, but you only get to choose one, Oppo.”

“I don’t know how to describe them — her breasts are like . . . “

Sign language for Oppo, in words he’ll understand:

“Whew! Got through it without him including me!”


 

Straight Line of the Day: Why Would You Want Kamala Harris To Be Your President?


 

Welcome to IMAO! We Literally Spend Most of Our Day Doing This:

There are worse places to work.

Except for The Emu.

Wait: I hear interns laughing down the hall. Gotta go.


 

Cartoons and Memes

“Hey Mr. Walrus, ready to take ‘er for a spin?”

“You betchya!”

“Well hop in the car and let’s go.”

“Car?”

Winner

10.

This week

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

Which one is funniest?
37 votes · 37 answers


 

Blade Runners

State (Iowa) sues company accused of dumping wind-turbine blades
Iowa Capital Dispatch | Sept. 26, 2024 | Clark Kauffman

The state of Iowa is suing a Washington-state company and its executives for allegedly dumping tons of old wind-turbine blades around Iowa, in violation of the state’s solid-waste laws.

The lawsuit alleges that over the past seven years, Global Fiberglass Solutions has failed to properly dispose of decommissioned wind-turbine blades and stockpiled them at multiple locations across Iowa.

The lawsuit, filed in Iowa District Court for Jasper County, seeks payment of civil penalties and a court injunction to prevent any additional violations of the state’s solid-waste laws.

Global Fiberglass Solutions and its CEO, Donald Lilly, are named as defendants in the case, as is Ronald Albrecht, one of Global’s corporate officers. The defendants could not be reached for comment.


From last year and Texas (but I repeat myself), here’s a story that’s behind a paywall, but the headline says it all:

General Electric Sues Texas Recycling Company Responsible for Sweetwater Wind Turbine Blade Dump The site in West Texas has been storing thousands of defunct turbine blades for years.


From Iowa, 2021…

State: Company illegally storing hundreds of old wind turbine blades at three Iowa sites


 

For the First Time in Ten or Twenty Years…

… FrnakJ logs in to see what’s become of his beloved website. His reaction:

… and he has no idea that an Emu has been hired.


 

CBS Maintaining Its Usual High Standards of Journalism, Again

CBS ’60 Minutes’ airs two different answers from VP Harris to the same question
Fox News  | October 9, 2024 | Brian Flood, David Rutz

CBS aired two different answers to the same question in its “60 Minutes” interview with Vice President Kamala Harris, replacing a clip from the Democratic nominee that aired on “Face the Nation” Sunday when the interview package aired in a primetime special on Monday.

Harris was mocked by conservatives when footage of her offering a lengthy “word salad” that was aired by CBS on Sunday’s “Face the Nation” to promote the “60 Minutes” sit-down, when Bill Whitaker asked why it seemed like Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu wasn’t listening to the United States. However, the vice president’s lengthy answer didn’t make the version that aired on Monday night on “60 Minutes” and a shorter, more focused answer to the same question was shown instead.

“Well Bill, the work that we have done has resulted in a number of movements in that region by Israel that were very much prompted by, or a result of, many things, including our advocacy for what needs to happen in the region,” Harris responded in the “Face the Nation” version.

Sometimes interviews are edited to save time, but when CBS aired the interview on Monday night, Harris had a different answer to the exact same question.

“We are not going to stop pursuing what is necessary for the United States to be clear about where we stand on the need for this war to end,” Harris said.

The Trump campaign called for CBS to release the full interview unedited on Tuesday.


 

CBS News Maintaining Its Usual Journalistic Standards, I See

Pedestrian possibly killed in crash that saw car being driven by DUI suspect plummet into Santa Ana River
CBS News | October 8, 2024 | Dean Fioresi

A pedestrian was killed when they were hit by a possibly drunk driver who drove their car off the road and into the Santa Ana River in Anaheim on Tuesday evening.

It happened at a little after 6:30 p.m. near E. Wagner Avenue and S. Rio Vista Street, according to the Anaheim Police Department.

Crews arrived at the scene to find a car that had landed in two feet of water in the Santa Ana River after veering off the road, police said. They’re investigating the driver as possibly being under the influence of an unknown suspect when the crash happened.

Both the driver and a passenger were able to exit the car under their own power, according to Anaheim Fire Department crews.

Video from the scene shows that the car drove through a fence that runs along a pedestrian walkway near the riverbed.

The video player is currently playing an ad.

While on scene, officers received information on a woman that was reported missing in the area. They say that her husband called to say that she had gone for a walk along the riverbed but had not returned home.

They discovered a body in some bushes at the scene, but are working to determine if it’s related to the crash.

Investigators believe that the car was traveling over 40 miles per hour when the crash occurred.

Y’know, maybe I’ll go into the police detective business. I’ve seen their magazine covers, and they’re hot. It doesn’t appear to be all that demanding or time-consuming a job, either.


 

New Fun Game: Try To Guess the Simple Direct Question Kamala Was Asked

Kamala Harris Dodges Colbert’s Question on . . . [truncated]
Fox via Yahoo | 10/9/24 | Joseph Wulfsohn

“And so when we think about the significance of what this next generation of leadership looks like, were I to be elected president, it is about – frankly, I love the American people, and I believe in our country. I love that it is our character and nature to be an ambitious people. You know, we have aspirations, we have dreams. We have incredible work ethic. And I just believe that we can create and build upon the success we’ve achieved in a way that we continue to grow opportunity and in that way, grow the strength of our nation,” Harris continued before touting her “opportunity economy” pitch and talking about her small business owner mother.


 

Straight Line of the Day: Pro Tip (or Life Hack) …

For the kids out there.


 

Welcome to Terrorist McTerrorTown

Why aren’t there freaking windows in these buildings?

OK, who wants to take point? I’ve got this blasted sprained hamstring, you see …