So as you probably know, I have this nanny (who continues to be great) 3 days a week. We switch up the days based on when I think I'm going to be busy and so far, it had been working out perfectly. On the 2 days she didn't come, I'd check emails and make a couple calls, but it was no big deal. And the came last week. The nanny (who I'm just going to refer to as L from now on) came Mon-Wed and then Thursday came and work was just insane. Constant phone calls and emails and crises that needed my attention and trying to take care of Jack at the same time. It's not that it was a disaster in the sense that he was ever in danger or unsafe, but there was a lot of solo playing, hanging out in his crib, and otherwise entertaining himself while I dealt with my shit. The worst part was that I was on a conference call with some folks from the studio and I could hear him wake up from his nap and (as occasionally happens) start screaming. Now while there are many folks I work with whom I could have said "let me call you back, my baby is yelling", the people I was on the phone with were not some of them. So 6 minutes of screaming child later, I got off the call and went to tend to my child. It was not a good day for the work/life balance. I know logically that he was fine. It's not like he didn't get fed or take his naps. It's not like I didn't hang out with him at all - I did. But I felt like a shitty mother. And that's not a great feeling.
On a happier note, he's actually doing really well. He's gotten to be a really happy baby and I feel like his personality is really starting to come out. He's (sometimes, sort of) responding to his name, which is so cool, and I'm really digging the phase we're in. I've kept up with the no pacifier for night sleeping - Rebecca, to answer your question from my last post: I have absolutely NOTHING against the pacifier, lord knows it's been good to me. My problem was that he was waking 4-8 times a night looking for it, which meant I was waking up 4-8 times a night to stick it back in his mouth. He'd go immediately back to sleep and I'd lay there for 20 minutes, which was not a sleep pattern that was working for me. A lot of people told me that if I could get to the point where he could find it in the crib and put it back in his own mouth I'd be golden, and that would have been awesome, but I just wasn't getting enough sleep to function as a normal person. Hence the pacifier removal. He's consistently sleeping 7-4/4:30 and I'm trying to not feed him until 5am each morning (hoping to start moving that slowly forward to 6am, but we'll see) He's legitimately hungry at 5am, so I have no problem feeding him, but it will be nice in the next month or so to be able to push that back.
Here are some "rejects" from the holiday Christmas card photo shoots I've been doing all week in an attempt to get the perfect picture, only to realize that there's no such thing and no matter which one I choose, the kid's adorable...
Off to get the Christmas tree tomorrow. If anyone reading this has a good suggestion about where to get a cute 1st Christmas ornament, let me know. I'm on the search...