Anybody that has worked in health care for an extended period of time has come to the realization that one of the most difficult categories of treatment is dealing with patients or family members with a health background. With such an intricate education, experience, and understanding of the system that they’re now a patient in, health professionals often have a difficult time keeping their own diagnoses, prognoses, and criticisms of care to themselves. So, the next time a patient or family member of a patient tells you that they’re also a nurse, should you alter your care for the patient? Imprint, the professional magazine for student nurses, states, “While stereotypes exist about patients who are nurses, it is very important that nurses who are patients be treated with respect, concern, and in need of professional nursing care, just as any patient should be. Just because a patient happens to be a nurse, does not mean care should be given any differently”. Although this states that you should not change how you would treat the patient, here are some tips for doing so in the most effective manner possible:

Maintain Self-Confidence:

One of the most important things to remember when dealing with a patient or family member who is a nurse, is that you are qualified. You have gone through the schooling, gone through different placements, and the floor you work on believes that you were the best-suited nurse for the position that you are currently in. It is crucial not to show hesitation or doubt in front of a patient like this because they will see that as weakness and become more skeptical of your skills. If they begin to question your technique, decision-making, or anything else, remember that you most likely have the more qualified opinion.

Also remember that it is important to exude self-confidence, but not arrogance. Confidence is a learned behavior of preparedness that is the direct result of practice, studying, and repetition. A nurse with confidence is the best kind of nurse in any situation. An arrogant nurse, however, has confidence that stems from a superiority complex, not from repetition. Arrogant nursing leads to accidents and confrontations while confident nursing leads to well-treated, healthier patients. As long as you maintain your self-confidence in front of a patient or family member who is a nurse, you will command their respect, even if they give you a tough time in the process.

Avoid Being Dismissive:

In addition, it is incredibly important to avoid being dismissive to a patient or family member who is a nurse. It is pivotal to remember that the patient does not want to be sick, they are likely scared, and your care should still be as good as humanly possible. Because of these factors, they cannot help but give pointers, ask challenging questions, make criticisms, and maybe even question your knowledge. This is where the difference between arrogance and confidence becomes clear.

Dismissiveness directly results in confrontation. If a patient who is a nurse asks you a question, answer it; if they ask for your qualifications, tell them; if they give you a pointer, consider it and reply with why you are doing things the way you currently are. Avoiding answering these questions, or telling them to let you do your job is confrontational, and makes them more uncomfortable. Would you avoid telling any other patient why and how you’re carrying out a certain type of care or treatment? Like Imprint mandates, treat the patient nurse like any other patient.

Don’t Lose Control of the Room:

Sometimes, following the above advice will not diffuse an escalating situation. Again, showing any sort of weakness is what the patient nurse is looking for. If you have been accommodating, answered all questions and criticisms, and maintained your confidence and yet the situation is still escalating, it is time to respectfully demand respect. Let your charge nurse know that the situation is not diffusing, get advice from them, and suggest that you will try to finally resolve the dispute the next time they interfere. The next time the patient nurse begins to cause a disruption, tell them, “I took [2/4] years of nursing school, and have earned my [BSN/RN]. This unit hired me because I am a great nurse. I have [x years] of experience in [oncology, ICU, etc.] nursing and have seen dozens of similar patients. I am acting on my knowledge in the best interest of you [or your family member]. You are obstructing my ability to give [you/your family member] the best care that I can”. It doesn’t need to necessarily be this formal, but it is important that you dismiss all invalidations of your ability so that you can continue treating them effectively. If this response still does not resolve the conflict, it is best to report back to your charge nurse.