Marinka: I have a stomach ache. I will probably die.
Husbandrinka: What do you think it is?
Marinka: It feels like the fat in my stomach is fighting the alcohol in my stomach and it’s a bitter battle.
Husbandrinka: You think you have cancer, don’t you.
Marinka: Just a touch, yes.
____________________
Also! even though I was going to post this exchange this morning, right before I did, I read Finslippy‘s post. So now I feel like I’m copy pants. I mean, copy breasts.
One year ago ...
- A Very Reasonable Person - 2012
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
HA stands for Hypochondriac anonymous.
Please guess what HAHA stands for……..
Do you realize I think I am dying almost daily, too? Any pain I have is something terrible. It’s so much worrying all the time! Left arm pain – heart attack. Slight quiver in my calf – blood clot traveling to my brain. Headache – tumor. Sigh. No wonder I’m crazy. I wish I lived with a doctor and an MRI machine. Seriously.
So much FUN worrying all the time. See, I forgort a word, and now I’m REALLY worried about my head.
In the past few days, I’ve been convinced I have cancer, tendonitis, MS and ALS.
And tinnitus, but that’s because there are UNION PROTESTERS on the corner BLOWING WHISTLES.
I love your domestic conversations. Very funny and so endearing. (Sounds like ours minus the funny).
Twitter: AdorkableKati
March 22, 2011 at 4:44 pm
I can’t believe none of you believe Marinka. Now she will probably die of a broken heart. Or stubbed toe.
Either way, her headstone will surely read “See? Told you I was sick!”
and you will all have to live with your guilt FOREVER.
Dammit! I knew it! Me too!
Twitter: gdrpempress
March 22, 2011 at 6:33 pm
I have hypochondria..but only about my children.
I think I’m invincible.
Them, on the other hand? I just stay away from WebMD when it comes to them.
This is why I’m canceling all other publications and sticking with US. I got my Redbook the other day and was convinced I had their disease du jour (or du month…I don’t speak French). I have to take issue with those articles though, because every single “The Dangerous Health Issue You Didn’t Know You Had!!!” blurb has the same diagnostic checklist: Are you tired? Are you always hungry? Are you irritable? Do you wish you were a size 6 on a regular basis?
So far, based on my my armchair diagnoses, I have a life expectancy of approximately 3 more days.
Twitter: Mamabirddiaries
March 22, 2011 at 8:05 pm
I absolutely know that you did not copy finslippy. You are a hypochondriac at heart.
Twitter: rimarama
March 22, 2011 at 10:22 pm
I went for a physical last week and asked my doctor if I was dying. She said, “We are all dying slowly every day.”
I can’t decide if I love or hate her.
I had a stomache for days and the ‘c’ word never crossed my mind. Hmmm…..
I think that means you’ll be fine. If you worry about it, it doesn’t happen. xoxo my friend
Twitter: OldTweener
March 22, 2011 at 11:52 pm
When the fat and the alcohol fight? It’s just wrong…two wonderful things that should just get along, dammit.
But I always think it’s something more sinister, too.
Twitter: theflyingchlupa
March 23, 2011 at 1:01 am
A glass half full is decidedly not funny. And this is why I love you.
PS – I’m really rooting for you to beat this.
As long as you don’t touch chest pain. CHEST PAIN IS TOTALLY MINE.
Twitter: allfookeduptoo
March 23, 2011 at 12:56 pm
well, i don’t read finslippy so i don’t know if you copied or not…
but i’m not sure those are cancer symptoms…
but it sounds like your hubby is awesome
The fat in my stomach is fighting the fat in my thighs. No one will win. And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, don’t die. Of C or any other letter ailment. What would the world be without your pale loveliness?
Twitter: homschlr4ever
March 23, 2011 at 4:45 pm
You sound like my daughter. It’s like coming home, only in your scenario I would be the husband. God forbid that she would miss any updates on WebMD.
But.., you are so much more fun to read than listening to E describe her newest disease. Wait, rewind, you made me laugh. Thanks.
Twitter: mommyshorts
March 24, 2011 at 12:42 am
I hope the alcohol and the fat start playing nicely by tomorrow morning. Sleep well!
Twitter: BrittanyVandy
March 24, 2011 at 7:55 pm
Ugh. After losing my sense of taste and smell last week and realizing that I could still taste wine I remembered my mother telling me that her friend with brain cancer had those same things. The cancer took her taste and smell. I had a total frak out moment and went to the doctor thinking cancer, cancer , cancer. Nope…but I am a grownup with a freaking ear infection!
Hope you feel better!
Only you could have a touch of cancer. I hope the worst is over.