From the course: Having Difficult Conversations

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Learn the magic phrase to test for resistance

Learn the magic phrase to test for resistance

From the course: Having Difficult Conversations

Learn the magic phrase to test for resistance

- Resistance in a difficult conversation can show up in many ways. People complain, argue, they procrastinate, and they avoid the conversation altogether. Resistance is a huge barrier to forward movement, growth, and productivity. I define resistance as any form of negativity or non-acceptance; an unwillingness to move forward. Listen to all the ways that people resist in a difficult conversation. "You aren't giving me any options." "This isn't fair." "I don't have enough time to do what you want." "It would cost too much." "What you're asking for is just not possible." "I told you I've already tried that." What do all these phrases have in common? A lack of willingness. Where there's a lack of willingness, there's stagnation. And nothing happens without willingness, it's the fulcrum point of change. When you start a difficult conversation, you should expect a lack of willingness. After all, you may be sharing bad news or you're asking someone to make a change. With change comes…

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