Monday: Although you are technically only supposed to participate in each puzzle once per day, I discovered there was no limit to the Sudoku mode. I've solved 45 puzzles in one marathon Brain-enhancing logic barrage in the hopes of asymptotically approaching some sort of intellectual singularity.
Brains!
This morning I repeated the Brain Age examination activity and discovered that my intellect had soared to a Brain Age of 25. I definitely attribute some of these spectacular results to last night's intellectual training regimen, although I also credit some part of my success to my ability to say the word "Blue" aloud, clearly and without accent -- a skill my Editorial compatriots are conspicuously lacking in. I shall endeavor to continue my experiments, working toward the ideal Brain Age of 20. Also, objective evidence indicates that I draw a mean Koala bear.
Tuesday: Woke up this morning with a headache. Too much Sudoku. In the shower I used a bar of soap to fill in my bathroom tiles with the numbers 1 through 9.
Afterwards, I took the Brain Age test and -- can you believe it? -- It tells me I've got a Brain Age of 29. I'm slipping. I hate the color blue.
Unfortunately my co-workers at GameSpy are no help whatsoever. "Maybe you're getting senile?" Justin suggested. I refuse to believe that Brain Age is tracking my descent into imbecility with some frickin' line graph. I'll try again tomorrow. After I finish this Sudoku.
Wednesday: Sudokus are hard. They're like crossword thingers but for numbers instead of people. I couldn't figure this one puzzle out at ALL, then realized that it was like WAY easier if you're allowed to use the numbers 10 though 14. I'm smartering by the minute!
But when I took the test quiz, the game told me that my Brain Age was 41! 41!
Pretty soon I'm going to go through menopause!
I'm sad. And the game showed me that Gerald's Koala was betterer than mine.
Tursday: Tried to play the smart game today but all the letters and the man guy dude was like TOTALLY upside down!!! I took it back to the store but the guy with the shirt that had the tag on it showed me I was holding my Nintendo WRONG! They should have a sign.
My GameSpy frends are worried. The Nintendo says my Brain is 67, which sounds SWEET but they tell me it's bad. Justin says I need to stop doing Sudoku. But he's dumb -- he tried to tell me not to use letters!
"Maybe I ARE more stupid!" I said, when he showed me the chart with the line going down. But then, when he left, I turned my Nintendo upside down again and the line was going back up. THE LAUGHS ON YOU NOW JUSTIN!
FIVE: i lose my pencil thing but my game box works fine if you lick it i am now 80 years old for brains!!
THIS MANY IIIIIIII: truned on game box but funny brain man talk. "Where's Wrestlemania Smackdown vs. Raw!?" i yeel.
justin and gerald tooks away my sodookies. •
[PlanetFargo appears every Friday on GameSpy.com, lowering the IQ of an already desperate population. Fargo also writes Flintlocke's Guide to Azeroth, a daily World of Warcraft comic. Mail Fargo! Then visit the PlanetFargo Archives or the really old PlanetFargo Archives for more.]
